Sorority Rush

[HM]

There aren't any balls of any color used in today's membership selection. The whole thing is done by a complicated computer program utilized by every chapter.

This!

Even back in my day early 80s, there was no black ball and no one person making a girl lose her chance at that particular house.

 

[NCRedding]

This!

Even back in my day early 80s, there was no black ball and no one person making a girl lose her chance at that particular house.

It took more than one person for a person not to be extended a bid. Even in the early 80's, there were formulas, and ways of prioritizing the rushes to make it as fair and equitable as possible.

DD was on the membership selection committee for her sorority. Her sorority relied heavily upon other members knowledge of the rushee, and the mass of available internet information out there. The sororities are hampered by the quotas set by PanHellenic, and the computer programs.

I went through rush my freshman year, and got dropped from the house I thought I wanted, mainly because I was very quiet and shy at the time; not because my clothes weren't right, or expensive, or anything like that. People just didn't know me. I pledged a house and after spending some time with the pledges and sisters, knew it wasn't the house for me. I depledged, and went through rush the next year, getting invites from every other house on campus, because people had gotten to know me in the additional months. I ended up pledging a different sorority from the one I thought I wanted my freshman year. My daughter also didn't get a bid from the one she thought she wanted, but ended up extremely happy with her pick.

It's sad to read those who have had a negative experience with sororities. For me, it was a great experience, even with the initial hurt I went through. I didn't "pay" for my friends. I formed valuable, wonderful, life-long friendships.

 

[jodifla]

It took more than one person for a person not to be extended a bid. Even in the early 80's, there were formulas, and ways of prioritizing the rushes to make it as fair and equitable as possible.

DD was on the membership selection committee for her sorority. Her sorority relied heavily upon other members knowledge of the rushee, and the mass of available internet information out there. The sororities are hampered by the quotas set by PanHellenic, and the computer programs.

I went through rush my freshman year, and got dropped from the house I thought I wanted, mainly because I was very quiet and shy at the time; not because my clothes weren't right, or expensive, or anything like that. People just didn't know me. I pledged a house and after spending some time with the pledges and sisters, knew it wasn't the house for me. I depledged, and went through rush the next year, getting invites from every other house on campus, because people had gotten to know me in the additional months. I ended up pledging a different sorority from the one I thought I wanted my freshman year. My daughter also didn't get a bid from the one she thought she wanted, but ended up extremely happy with her pick.

It's sad to read those who have had a negative experience with sororities. For me, it was a great experience, even with the initial hurt I went through. I didn't "pay" for my friends. I formed valuable, wonderful, life-long friendships.

Lots of great points and information in your posts.

Other things that sororities offer is a national network of connections. This has been so invaluable when I've moved.

And in school, being able to study together was really helpful. Lots of times their were sisters who already had the class and could coach you, mentor you, tutor you.

 

[Grumpy's Gal]

sometimes the house loves the girl but she doesn't get invited because her grades aren't high enough.

 

[Jeafl]

As a mom of 3, I understand how awful it feels to know your kid is hurting and there is nothing you can do about it.

However, I was wondering why your daughter didn't give one of the sororities who wanted her a chance? She essentially rejected a whole lot of girls when she turned them down. It is kind of a two-way street. Maybe she would have been really happy with one of them. What was her reason for rejecting them?

 

[SLK1]

As a mom of 3, I understand how awful it feels to know your kid is hurting and there is nothing you can do about it.

However, I was wondering why your daughter didn't give one of the sororities who wanted her a chance? She essentially rejected a whole lot of girls when she turned them down. It is kind of a two-way street. Maybe she would have been really happy with one of them. What was her reason for rejecting them?

Very good question! I don't know...she met all the groups and when she had to narrow down her choices, the two who were on her final card (the two who did want her) were not at all her top choices. So I guess in her mind, they just weren't a right fit. As someone who has never done this, I think it may have been a mistake, but it's not my choice, it's hers. If it was me, I would have gone with the people who wanted ME! But our kids can be stubborn and narrow-minded, right?!

Things are looking up and of course she will live.

 

[Jeafl]

Very good question! I don't know...she met all the groups and when she had to narrow down her choices, the two who were on her final card (the two who did want her) were not at all her top choices. So I guess in her mind, they just weren't a right fit. As someone who has never done this, I think it may have been a mistake, but it's not my choice, it's hers. If it was me, I would have gone with the people who wanted ME! But our kids can be stubborn and narrow-minded, right?!

Things are looking up and of course she will live.

Just keep telling yourself "This too shall pass".