I definitely think that saving homework is a good thing. I saved ALL of my notes from chiropractic school. Still have them. If I ever unretire and need to take the Boards again, I have my info right there.
Probably one of the toughest classes I took was Spinology, and the teacher had his lectures memorized. He had his notes on paper, which he gave out, and then he read the notes (not in a boring way, it was actually quite nice), and we could LISTEN and really hear, without having to take scads of notes. IN order to study for his class, I would re-write his notes. And in that way I'd heard it, read it, and was now writing it. Most excellent. For my other classes, from the spinology experience, I would re-write my notes every night when I got home, making them pretty and neat. And when midterms came up, I re-wrote them again, and when finals came up, again. I did *very* well in chiro school (and the quarter when I didn't have a TV, I got straight As), and I think it's because I saved ALL of my notes, then studied directly from them.
So I definitely think that keeping homework and tests, and making sure to go back and correct wrong answers and learn WHY he had gotten them wrong, is a valuable tool.
Just last year, I finally said "OK this lack of organization is impossible and must change". I bought cheapie binders during back to school sales, I bought a hole punch, and a stapler. I had tons of files and had played with various ways of keeping those files, but for me, once it's in a file it's GONE. Similar to how your son will put a paper somewhere, and then not find it. The files were attempted for years, because "that's how you do it!" But it wasn't, not for me.
And at long last (I'm 40) I finally found the organizational system that works for me. I still don't have a strong habit of punching holes and putting things in the right place immediately, I'll still end up with a pile of stuff on my desk, but I even have labels on my binders.
Soon I'll be switching to the system that they sell at, hmm, Office Max...the InFile? something like that? system with sturdy plastic labels that slide down onto the outer edge of the binder, so my binders can be all lined up and pretty, with places for everything.
After years of losing every bit of insurance, medical bill, notes on calls to people like ambulance companies that were being a pain, etc etc, I finally finally have ONE place to put things, and it's all labeled. One section for bills, one for EOBs (which I print out), one for bill+EOB+receipt once it's done. I can put my hands on everything.
Would this system work for your son? I don't know. But it's worth putting some, let's face it, MONEY into it to find what does work for him. File cabinets? Binders? Boxes from Ikea that he can stack up? Who knows? All I know is that after decades of losing everything, I'm finally a more organized person.
I also keep lots of things I shouldn't. My bridal magazine collection was immense. I finally decided that I could go through each of them one last time, take out pages I thought were awesome, then tear off the cover of the Martha Stewart and British ones, and then recycle them. We've been married 7 years, and I only did this last year. they had no use, I couldn't even tell you what I got from having them, but I felt like I needed them...it took all that time to find something that I could deal with, some way to get rid of them without upsetting me.
So finding those little ways *earlier* rather than *later* really seems an amazing thing to do. Especially since it's a pretty big deal with him.
I don't see the point in saving the already graded homework.
Correct wrong answers, solidify the learning, and to study from. That's even without getting into what the teacher will do for the tests. (which, I must say, sound like really easy tests!)
You're right about that, he'll keep them- in his backpack, in the bottom of his locker, all over his room. He'll keep them, but have NO IDEA where they are.
I think I have a 3 ring binder upstairs I can use for this.
Good good. Just figure out what he might need, what might work for him. And then support him into getting into a system, and honestly I'd say to support that for as long as it takes! I had no support, though I had plenty of people on my case about losing things and needing to be more organized (and their answers were almost always to just throw things away, which I refused to do because most of the things I keep I do have an actual OR perceived need for...I just needed to organize it more). So support is good.
To Jack EVERYTHING is important- it's very frustrating.
Then he's got to learn to organize it. right now, in your home, it seems that throwing things away is the answer. But when he does get out on his own, he might not want to follow that rule, and so having a good solid system that works for him will be good! You have lots of time before it's that time, which sounds like it might be needed with him.
He really doesn't have a routine. Routines/schedules freak him out. It makes school the HARDEST thing he does.
I know the feeling from personal experience with my own self.
Throughout my daughter's education, she has had to correct the mistakes she makes on homework and tests, regardless if it is required by the teacher. It is required by me. I want to be certain that she understands where the mistake occurs and why.
Organization is a skill that we all need. It is certainly one of the life skills needed for success. Having your DS be organized will never hurt him, and will only help him. When he gets home from school, have him empty the backpack and together begin the organization process.
I totally agree!
Do you throw away a recipe after you've made it once? Most likely not. You probably keep your recipes tucked away in a neat place where they can be accessed when you need them. Think of his homework the same way.
I like the analogy! Uhoh, I need a system for my printed out recipes! Right now they are in piles in various places. I think a trip to Office Max is in my future.
I've known people who were so opposed to hoarding that they threw everything away - receipts, bank statements, warranty information, etc. - and that makes everything much more complicated.
That's the sort of thing DH does when he goes on a cleaning binge. After a few mis-steps, he now puts the things he wants to throw out (that aren't specifically and exactly HIS) into my desk area, and I deal with them.
I do see what you mean and I certainly DO NOT want to do this for him- but honestly I'm not sure if this is something he can be taught. We have struggled since day 1 with organization. He loses binders and textbooks- let alone a single sheet of paper.
I know many think Asperger's is the diagnosis du jour, but trust me it's real. Thirty years ago my son would have just been considered the "weird kid" by kids and adults. He has an IQ of 138 and the teachers admit if they tested him orally he would pass everything with flying colors (he's a sponge) but ask him to write it down and he's done.
It's frustrating to say the least. He has lots of potential but it's hard to tap into.
I never thought I would find a way of organizing my stuff. Don't give up. Even if it were 30 years ago and he were the "weird kid", he'd still need to be organized. And he's going to need to be organized as an adult.
With his plan, can't he be tested orally? I know in college they would do that for people who couldn't meet the testing time limits for various reasons. Sounds like the way I studied, with writing and re-writing, wouldn't work for him, BUT what if he had you reading the problems to him, so he could learn like that?
My brother, who is stinkin' brilliant and 3 years in school behind me, had two advantages. One, he's really smart. And two, he helped me study. And as he helped me, he was memorizing the info. So when he got into the class 3 years later, he knew it from helping me. (it's good to be the younger one!) So I know that one can learn by hearing (he would ask me the questions, I would answer), and it might be a great way for him to study, even if *reading* the papers doesn't work for him all that well. So you guys keep the papers because it's the rule, then to study you break them out and have a little study group.
Perhaps I'm a bit overprotective when reading comments that insinuate that my BFF is not doing everything in her power to raise a functional and productive son.
Sometimes it's also good to let outsiders toss in their 2 cents, though. My brother, blissfully childfree and a person that actively disliked children until he decided he liked my son, has some of the best ideas, and knows my son, in some ways, better than I do. If I didn't let him give insights, I would have lost out on a few brilliant moments.
Op good luck!
) I didn't take it as her accusing the OP of throwing away tax returns, but I definitely see that it could also be read that way. I know what you mean about being defensive on someone's behalf, though - I do that on here sometimes and once I start feeling that way I do tend to take posts as being more of an attack than they might have been intended to be. It's so hard to convey tone on here!
Just keep working with your son and the school. I've done everything but stand on my head to help my students...I have a feeling the head stands are going to be coming soon, though. A reasonable teacher will work out the details given the situation. Hang in there!
