Single Parent Support Thread

[MNT568]

I hope everyone has a great 4th of July! I'm having a cookout for my mom and my sisters family tomorrow. It is going to be HOT! I have the super soakers ready to go for the kids (any maybe the adults too!). We are at our 25 day mark, we leave for WDW on July 28th! I can't wait, work has been so stressful. I hope I can make it!

 

[newdisneymum]

Hi everybody! I am a single mom to DD4 and DS2, I've pretty a single mom pretty much since the birth of DS2..there father hangs around sometimes and every now and then he will give support but not regularly...DD4 has been to DW 7 times and DS2 5 times. We just got back from the Contemporary for DD's 4th birthday, we are planning to go back to go back to the Beach in May for DS's 3rd birthday

 

[Singleminnie]

My three DDs and I are going to WDW at the end of Oct. 22 through 30th. We are staying with my brother who lives in Tampa (one of my money saving ideas) we will be spending a few days at WDW, but we also planning on going to Sea World and Bush Gardens too! Also want to take my girls to see the ocean, they have never seen it before. I think my brother is as excited as my girls, my oldest has been to WDW when she was 6, but the other two have never been. They have also never ridden on an airplane, so they are in for a lot of new experiences! I can't wait !

 

[2Tiggies]

Hi, I'm a single mom to an 8 year old DD. We are going back to Disney World in October (haven't told her yet, I'll tell her the day we leave ).

Her dad works and travels internationally and he lives halfway across the world from us now. He has only been to visit her twice since he left in 2003. I invited him to meet us at WDW in October this year and he was quite excited about the idea of surprising her. By the time ADR time rolled around and I asked him how many to make the reservations for, he said to just go ahead without him. I am glad this is a surprise trip and DD never has to know about that. Never mind, Disney is our special place (mine and DD's) and we are going to have a great time!

 

[Melissa]

Great thread idea, I'm a single mom for just about a year now, before that I was happily co parenting with my husband of 15 years. Our daughter is 12. Kind of sounds like he died doesn't it? Nope he basically got up one day announced he hadn't had enough fun in his life and he needed to go to be with a woman he had had been having an emotional affair with for 4 months. His midlife crisis progressed and I divorced him pretty quickly. He is in the throws of a very bad depression and couldn't/wouldn't work with me to save all we had built. He went from a very involved and loving dad to being a ride and a pay check to our daughter. 2 weeks before this all came out we were at Vero Beach and WDW on a family vacation. No one who knows us ever would have seen it coming he literally became another person. But on I go, adjusting to being a single parent is hard but I am doing it. I am just now feeling able to think of going to Disney again. WDW was a very special family thing for us and to know that on our last vacation he was calling his girlfriend kind of soured it for me for a bit for awhile.

 

[Kat&Dom]

Great thread idea, I'm a single mom for just about a year now, before that I was happily co parenting with my husband of 15 years. Our daughter is 12. Kind of sounds like he died doesn't it? Nope he basically got up one day announced he hadn't had enough fun in his life and he needed to go to be with a woman he had had been having an emotional affair with for 4 months. His midlife crisis progressed and I divorced him pretty quickly. He is in the throws of a very bad depression and couldn't/wouldn't work with me to save all we had built. He went from a very involved and loving dad to being a ride and a pay check to our daughter. 2 weeks before this all came out we were at Vero Beach and WDW on a family vacation. No one who knows us ever would have seen it coming he literally became another person. But on I go, adjusting to being a single parent is hard but I am doing it. I am just now feeling able to think of going to Disney again. WDW was a very special family thing for us and to know that on our last vacation he was calling his girlfriend kind of soured it for me for a bit for awhile.

I got the call from the other woman on Mother's day so that day has been spoiled for me so I totally understand your feelings!

I divorced my ex for adultery really quickly when I realized the web of lies that he was living and it is almost unheard of because most people do the living separate and apart for one year to get their divorces. I am glad that I did it as adultery because our divorce is a legal document and he needs a copy of it in order to remarry, so someday when he remarries, in big black bold letters "ADULTERY" stands out.

Anyway, hugs to you and your daughter - you are much better off without him and his selfish ways!

 

[Melissa]

I got the call from the other woman on Mother's day so that day has been spoiled for me so I totally understand your feelings!

I divorced my ex for adultery really quickly when I realized the web of lies that he was living and it is almost unheard of because most people do the living separate and apart for one year to get their divorces. I am glad that I did it as adultery because our divorce is a legal document and he needs a copy of it in order to remarry, so someday when he remarries, in big black bold letters "ADULTERY" stands out.

Anyway, hugs to you and your daughter - you are much better off without him and his selfish ways!

Lucky for him Maine is a no fault State so I couldn't legally brand him an Adulterer but I did get the house and he got all the debt, so Someone said to me today you got divorced so fast! But for me it was best if we weren't actively fixing it then we were going to be done. Hopefully time will help those triggers fade for us.

 

[KnoxDisney]

I am a single mom of two, DS 12 and DD 8. I have been divorced for 2 years. My ex had a midlife crisis...now he wants us back. Trying to decide what to do...it is very hard.

Anyway, I have no extra money for Disney. Really makes me sad. We had a great time when we went 4 years ago. I am thinking about getting a second job to save for another trip...we will see!

Dating...ummm...did that. I was in a relationship with a single dad of one. He couldn't warm up to my daughter because she was everything his daughter was not. In addition, he hated that my kids got excited when they talked to their dad. He was hurt. Seriously????

 

[Melissa]

I am a single mom of two, DS 12 and DD 8. I have been divorced for 2 years. My ex had a midlife crisis...now he wants us back. Trying to decide what to do...it is very hard.

I think about the whole what would I do if he wanted to come back thing... so far it hasn't happened. He has said he wishes he made a different choice, he wishes he tried harder and longer to fix things ( apparently he now realizes 3 weeks of marriage counseling wasn't a good try.) But he has done nothing beyond say how he has ruined his life to try to change anything. It is a hard thing b/c you had something good once and he is your kids father. No advice on that one. But it is good to know we aren't alone. I had it in my head that everyone on this board was in a perfect "whole" family and it was just me that was out here alone. Good to know I am not the only one.

 

[disneymom/teacher]

Hello! I've been reading the disboards for about 3 years. I am not very good with a computer, so I really never knew how to post a message. Well today I found this thread and it made me try to be a part of this community. I was married for 21 years, have a 14 year old daughter and a 6year old son. I found out that my husband was cheating on me with a girl from his work on Nov. 11, 2008. He moved out the following Valentine's Day, and 3 weeks later he lost his job. Thanks God he was already moved out! We were officially divorced this past Nov. I am very glad to not be with him anymore, but being single after 21 years of marriage isn't easy. I have a love of all things Disney, my friends and family always tease me. Last year a friend came on our trip to Disney to help me with the kids since there is such a big age difference and she had never been there. We had a great time even though my son HATED lines and waiting for anything. Well this year I decided that I wanted to go to my happy place without my kids. My parents and friends think I'm crazy but that I shouldn't feel guilty for going and doing something for me. So my friend that went with me last year, is once again going with me for a very different trip. I am so excited! We are going from 8/1-8/9. We are staying at thr POP. I hope I can someday meet some disboarders. Is anyone going to be there on my dates?

 

[adsrtw]

Hi everybody. Long weekend is finally. Lots of family activities. Welcome to the thread to our newest posters. More comments after a few hours of shut eye.

 

[adaygaby]

Good morning to all..! Hope everyone had a great holiday weekend.

DS6 left this Sunday to spend the summer with his dad out of town. 35 more days 'til I get to see him again...

It'll be a nice break for these first couple of days but it will sure be a struggle after next weekend. Never been without him for more than 8 days.

So for now I will try to keep myself busy with getting things ready for our disney trip which is in 38 days.

Welcome to all the new posters on the thread.

 

[Amg120499]

Hi! I am a single mom to dd8. She is the light of my life and I am so happy to have her. Her father just recently started getting her every other weekend and it looks like we will be doing every other week for the summer. He doesn't help support her financially and lives with his new girlfriend and her children a few towns over.

I am glad I found this thread. Wish I would have seen it sooner - I just started a thread looking for advice because my ex can only think of himself. If anyone has any pointers, let me know.

 

[adsrtw]

Hi! I am a single mom to dd8. She is the light of my life and I am so happy to have her. Her father just recently started getting her every other weekend and it looks like we will be doing every other week for the summer. He doesn't help support her financially and lives with his new girlfriend and her children a few towns over.

I am glad I found this thread. Wish I would have seen it sooner - I just started a thread looking for advice because my ex can only think of himself. If anyone has any pointers, let me know.

I have that with my ex too. For me, it's a losing battle. Hang in there!

I just have to hold on until Tuesday afternoon. I will have some much needed time off from work.

 

[Maggie'sMom]

my ex can only think of himself. If anyone has any pointers, let me know.

That describes my ex too. He is a true narcissist. As for pointers, even though your ex may do things (or not do things, as the case may be) that hurt your daughter's feelings, don't talk negatively about him to her or in front of her. She will already feel torn between still loving her dad and being upset about how he treats her. There's no need to add additional emotions to the mix. But if your ex is going to bail out on plans with your daughter, make him be the one to tell her. You don't want to be the bearer of bad news. Try to maintain a civil relationship with your ex. Be flexible with schedules if it benefits your daughter. And my number one pointer is: Just let her know each and every day how important she is to you and how much you love her.

 

[adsrtw]

That describes my ex too. He is a true narcissist. As for pointers, even though your ex may do things (or not do things, as the case may be) that hurt your daughter's feelings, don't talk negatively about him to her or in front of her. She will already feel torn between still loving her dad and being upset about how he treats her. There's no need to add additional emotions to the mix. But if your ex is going to bail out on plans with your daughter, make him be the one to tell her. You don't want to be the bearer of bad news. Try to maintain a civil relationship with your ex. Be flexible with schedules if it benefits your daughter. And my number one pointer is: Just let her know each and every day how important she is to you and how much you love her.

Absolutely! On top of this, kids are smart. They might not always express what they think/ feel about a situation, but they will remember it and hold on to it. That goes for good and bad situations.

 

[adsrtw]

With one eye open, I'm reading some older posts that I missed. I noticed that cheating is a common link for many of us. I kicked my ex out on Friday, February 13, 2004 because our son caught him with my best friend. I was pregnant with our daughter. What was a miserable night, ended up being the night I named her. I couldn't remember if i shared that. What amazes me is the lack of regret from him.

 

[Amg120499]

Oh do I have a cheating tale to tell.....I was the one who called the other woman (that he found online) when I got a cell phone bill that was over $300. Found out that he was telling this woman that he was a black man that was never married, had no children and lived with his father. In reality, he's an Italian that was marreid twice with three kids. He even went so far to send her a picture of the two of us and told her that we were his friends. Oh and he was sending her money too. She said he sent her well over $1,000 over a few months.

Jerk.

 

[adsrtw]

Oh do I have a cheating tale to tell.....I was the one who called the other woman (that he found online) when I got a cell phone bill that was over $300. Found out that he was telling this woman that he was a black man that was never married, had no children and lived with his father. In reality, he's an Italian that was marreid twice with three kids. He even went so far to send her a picture of the two of us and told her that we were his friends. Oh and he was sending her money too. She said he sent her well over $1,000 over a few months.

Jerk.

I'm so sorry! Horrible experience!

I'm in a Eeyore kind of mood today. Hoping I can get out of it quickly.

 

[adsrtw]

Hey everybody!

I am so looking forward to next week. I'm only working Monday and Tuesday. Yay! I'm packing up the kids and heading to Indianapolis then Cincinnati. I love road trips, but I can't wait for our BIG road trip in September.