Sigh, why are people so difficult...need a little advice please

[3prettyprincesses]

My DD8 started horseback riding lessons. At her 1st lesson, the instructor yelled and snapped at her (and 2 other girls) so much so that my DD was crying her eyes out while on the horse. Then she asked my daughter a question and my DD said she didn't know the answer (something about the difference between ponies and horses). Well, the instructor then yells at her, telling her it's a simple yes or no answer. I was livid as I watched all of this unfold before my very eyes. Needless to say, the next day I called the owner and told her we would be discontinuing with lessons there. Here's the kicker, she won't refund my money (minus the cost of that one lesson). Nowhere on the paper I signed did it say that the money was non-refundable. I'm very frustrated and not sure how to proceed. I hate confrontations but I really feel this owner is taking advantage of me and my DD. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

ETA: My DH told me to put a stop on the check I gave her.

 

[lacrosse_lady72]

First of all, I'm sorry.

But the thing is, as absurd as she may be, you did sign the contract saying the money it NOT refundable, period. With what you signed, and you stoping the check payment, I think (and correct me if I'm wrong) she can sue you for the payment.

 

[MichelleVW]

My DD8 started horseback riding lessons. At her 1st lesson, the instructor yelled and snapped at her (and 2 other girls) so much so that my DD was crying her eyes out while on the horse. Then she asked my daughter a question and my DD said she didn't know the answer (something about the difference between ponies and horses). Well, the instructor then yells at her, telling her it's a simple yes or no answer. I was livid as I watched all of this unfold before my very eyes. Needless to say, the next day I called the owner and told her we would be discontinuing with lessons there. Here's the kicker, she won't refund my money (minus the cost of that one lesson). Nowhere on the paper I signed did it say that the money was non-refundable. I'm very frustrated and not sure how to proceed. I hate confrontations but I really feel this owner is taking advantage of me and my DD. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

ETA: My DH told me to put a stop on the check I gave her.

Wow...what a loser barn!! My DD16 had ridden at barns in North Carolina, Texas and North Dakota and never has she been treated like that. You need to run far away from that place. I can't believe you had to pay for a package of lessons up front without a trial lesson first?

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

I would stop payment.

Now she likely will take you to small claims court and your paper (if you have a copy) would be sufficient to prove your case. You'll need to issue a check for the new lesson though.


Funny story--my mother did this to a pageant once b/c she was so ticked that I lost. (don't get me started! ) She was subsequently sued and she was fine to pay the fee after that. She just wanted to tick the pageant people off right back.

Oh lordy lordy. I believe that was the last pageant I ever did.

My mother had no claim, but I can't believe she was that mad to do that.

If the instructor doesn't have a clear "no refuned policy"--then you shouldn't have to oh her any money especially after the way she treated your daughter.

You don't need to confront the instructor until she sues you.

And if you have a lawyer friend, you may have them help you write a response and likely can avoid a courtroom.

ETA: I THOUGHT YOU SAID THE PAPER WORK DIDNT' SAY IT WAS NON-REFUNDALBE. MY MISTAKE. You will lose a small-claims case then. Just like my pageant mom. Even though your complaint is wayyyy more valid.

But if anyone ever asks you about places to get horseback lessons. I would make sure to mention you do not recommend this place and state your case. That is not illegal or immoral to do.

ETAA: You can always look up contract law in your state for sales. If you signed the contract on arrival, maybe there is a 72 hour loophole. We have those here in Florida. It is on any sales slip for anything from a tupperware party to a timeshare sale. You MAY be able to get out of the contract anyway regardless if her policy is no refund. Not sure if it applies, but it may be worth looking into to see if it does in your case.

 

[tileman]

Sorry to hear some people are just crazy.

I know me after the 1st time she yelled and snapped I would of asked for my money back.

Good luck.

Ron.

 

[3prettyprincesses]

First of all, I'm sorry.

But the thing is, as absurd as she may be, you did sign the contract saying the money it NOT refundable, period. With what you signed, and you stoping the check payment, I think (and correct me if I'm wrong) she can sue you for the payment.

Thanks. Actually, the paperwork did not say that the money was non-refundable.

 

[lsyorke]

First of all, I'm sorry.

But the thing is, as absurd as she may be, you did sign the contract saying the money it NOT refundable, period. With what you signed, and you stoping the check payment, I think (and correct me if I'm wrong) she can sue you for the payment.

She said it didn't say it was unrefundable.

Contact the Better Business Bureau and spread the word around about the horrible service. You may not get your money back, but you'll feel better.

 

[laurie31]

Wow, that's terrible.

My girls have been riding for 8 years and have never been treated that way. I'm surprised she didn't start off with private lessons on lead-line. Even *I* did, and I was an adult when I started riding.

It would be one thing if your DD just changed her mind and didn't want to take lessons anymore, but since you're quitting because the instructor was such an...um...horse's behind, I think you should get your money back.

I also hope you can find another barn with an instructor who is good with children. Riding is great exercise, and also teaches so much; our girls have to tack up their own horses (now that they're older) and groom them after their lessons. Please tell your DD that *most* instructors want to share their love of horses with their students and don't yell at them, especially on their first day.

 

[3prettyprincesses]

I would stop payment.

Now she likely will take you to small claims court and your paper (if you have a copy) would be sufficient to prove your case. You'll need to issue a check for the new lesson though.


Funny story--my mother did this to a pageant once b/c she was so ticked that I lost. (don't get me started! ) She was subsequently sued and she was fine to pay the fee after that. She just wanted to tick the pageant people off right back.

Oh lordy lordy. I believe that was the last pageant I ever did.

My mother had no claim, but I can't believe she was that mad to do that.

If the instructor doesn't have a clear "no refuned policy"--then you shouldn't have to oh her any money especially after the way she treated your daughter.

You don't need to confront the instructor until she sues you.

And if you have a lawyer friend, you may have them help you write a response and likely can avoid a courtroom.

ETA: I THOUGHT YOU SAID THE PAPER WORK DIDNT' SAY IT WAS NON-REFUNDALBE. MY MISTAKE. You will lose a small-claims case then. Just like my pageant mom. Even though your complaint is wayyyy more valid.

But if anyone ever asks you about places to get horseback lessons. I would make sure to mention you do not recommend this place and state your case. That is not illegal or immoral to do.

No you were right, the paper did not say that the money was non-refundable. There wasn't any mention of a non-refundable policy. Nada.

 

[Bluestars]

I don't blame your daughter for not wanting to go back. When my son was little he went to a couple of free Taekwondo lessons. The instructor was so hard on the kids that my son did not want to sign up. We were lucky that the lessons were free and we had not signed any paperwork.

I hope you get your money back.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

She said it didn't say it was unrefundable.

Contact the Better Business Bureau and spread the word around about the horrible service. You may not get your money back, but you'll feel better.

caught that and edited..I totally missed it.

 

[Buckalew11]

I've heard we have pretty tough horse lesson lady here. She's very strict with the kids but needs to be--no messing around with horses. However, your lady sounds like she is just impatient, mean and intimidating to kids (and maybe adults). I know our lady is scary because my friend has told me that she makes her DD ask question istead of herself because of how she acts/answers. Strange if you ask me but the place stays busy.

PS, maybe you should call Kate and sic her on her.

 

[Lisa loves Pooh]

No you were right, the paper did not say that the money was non-refundable. There wasn't any mention of a non-refundable policy. Nada.

Check for a law that allows for any contracts to be cancelled within 72 hours of signing. (of course this only works if you signed the contract today).

And it helps if there is a law, to cancel it in writing via certified mail as that is your proof she got it within 72 hours.

And now I'm confused---

IF the paperwork did not have an explicit no-refund policy, then stop the check.

Dising at 11pm should be banned.

 

[Jennasis]

Sounds like you got one of the many instructors who have no "stall-side manor". I am amazed that there are folks who will pay these idgits to berate their kids.

FWIW, I have a no refund policy at my barn for lessons that are pre-paid. I only allow students to pay for 4 lessons at a time and it is clearly stated that we do not refund. We offer a significant discount on prepaid lessons.

I HAVE however refunded money for extenuating circumstances such as health issues that prevent a student from taking lessons. It depends on how comfortable you feel fighting the good fight, and if it's worth the hassle.

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I hope this hasn't soured your DD on riding and you guys can find a new barn with a more competant instructor. When you do find a new barn, take DD and go and watch a few lessons in progress to see if you like the teaching style. I always invite prospective new students to come out and view a lesson or two and to meet the other students.

 

[C.Ann]

"First" lesson and she was yelled at several times? Oh yeah - I'd be ticked.. And she would NOT be going back..

 

[lacrosse_lady72]

Thanks. Actually, the paperwork did not say that the money was non-refundable.

Oh... whoopsy, I misread that part! Then yes, definitely! Stop that payment immediately... the way she treated you about not refunding you what so ever I wouldn't even want to pay for that first lesson... someone unnecessarily yelling at my child like that, I certainly wouldn't stick with them!

 

[3prettyprincesses]

Wow...what a loser barn!! My DD16 had ridden at barns in North Carolina, Texas and North Dakota and never has she been treated like that. You need to run far away from that place. I can't believe you had to pay for a package of lessons up front without a trial lesson first?

Ya, that would've been easier, to have a trial lesson and then I would've seen right away that this instructor was insane. Lesson learned!

Wow, that's terrible.

My girls have been riding for 8 years and have never been treated that way. I'm surprised she didn't start off with private lessons on lead-line. Even *I* did, and I was an adult when I started riding.

It would be one thing if your DD just changed her mind and didn't want to take lessons anymore, but since you're quitting because the instructor was such an...um...horse's behind, I think you should get your money back.

I also hope you can find another barn with an instructor who is good with children. Riding is great exercise, and also teaches so much; our girls have to tack up their own horses (now that they're older) and groom them after their lessons. Please tell your DD that *most* instructors want to share their love of horses with their students and don't yell at them, especially on their first day.

My DD is completely anti-riding now. What a shame that such a nasty person is allowed to treat children like that when they're supposed to be teaching them. I'm a former kindergarten teacher and I would never treat a child like this woman treated mine.

I've heard we have pretty tough horse lesson lady here. She's very strict with the kids but needs to be--no messing around with horses. However, your lady sounds like she is just impatient, mean and intimidating to kids (and maybe adults). I know our lady is scary because my friend has told me that she makes her DD ask question istead of herself because of how she acts/answers. Strange if you ask me but the place stays busy.

PS, maybe you should call Kate and sic her on her.

I recognized your name from the J&K thread Buckelew. Yes, this lady had zero patience not just with my daughter but with the other 2 girls who have been there a while. I literally was standing there in shock while she yelled and berated my daughter. The other moms were just shaking their heads in sympathy. My DH said he was glad he wasn't there because he would've marched right up to that lady and said we're leaving now.

Sounds like you got one of the many instructors who have no "stall-side manor". I am amazed that there are folks who will pay these idgits to berate their kids.

FWIW, I have a no refund policy at my barn for lessons that are pre-paid. I only allow students to pay for 4 lessons at a time and it is clearly stated that we do not refund. We offer a significant discount on prepaid lessons.

I HAVE however refunded money for extenuating circumstances such as health issues that prevent a student from taking lessons. It depends on how comfortable you feel fighting the good fight, and if it's worth the hassle.

I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I hope this hasn't soured your DD on riding and you guys can find a new barn with a more competant instructor. When you do find a new barn, take DD and go and watch a few lessons in progress to see if you like the teaching style. I always invite prospective new students to come out and view a lesson or two and to meet the other students.

It has soured my DD unfortunately. I appreciate your input especially since you own a barn and provide lessons. I'm thinking this lady is just going to keep my money despite the fact we are so unhappy with our experience there. I've tried contacting her several times and she won't respond. What a waste of money though, especially during this time of year. I certainly won't recommend her place to anyone.

Oh... whoopsy, I misread that part! Then yes, definitely! Stop that payment immediately... the way she treated you about not refunding you what so ever I wouldn't even want to pay for that first lesson... someone unnecessarily yelling at my child like that, I certainly wouldn't stick with them!

I don't want to pay for the remaining lessons but she has my check and I feel like I'm going to make things worse if I put a stop on it. I still can't believe the audacity of that instructor though, it was crazy watching her yell and snip at the my DD and the other girls. One of the other moms cringed everytime the instructor yelled or berated my DD. I will never go back there, ever.

Thanks everyone for your comments. I appreciate all of the input. Sometimes I just don't understand people but I think I've learned my lesson here...always do a trial lesson before you pay for a block of lessons.

 

[MichelleVW]

You need to spread the news about that "instructor" to everyone that will listen. Word of mouth is pretty big in the horse world.

There are some rotten barns out there...some that push the kids too fast, I've seen kids jumping that could barely stay on the horse and it was very scary to me, and I've also seen barns that don't let the kids progress either, they just keep taking their money every week, but don't teach them anything new.

I'm so sorry your DD is soured on riding right now. My DD took a break from riding for awhile because it was too much stress and she didn't enjoy it anymore, but now she's started riding again. Hopefully she'll get back into it....horses are so much fun!

 

[3prettyprincesses]

You need to spread the news about that "instructor" to everyone that will listen. Word of mouth is pretty big in the horse world.

There are some rotten barns out there...some that push the kids too fast, I've seen kids jumping that could barely stay on the horse and it was very scary to me, and I've also seen barns that don't let the kids progress either, they just keep taking their money every week, but don't teach them anything new.

I'm so sorry your DD is soured on riding right now. My DD took a break from riding for awhile because it was too much stress and she didn't enjoy it anymore, but now she's started riding again. Hopefully she'll get back into it....horses are so much fun!

Thanks Michelle. I'm part of a yahoo group for homeschooling that is large (like 70+ families) so I think I'll send an email around to let people know about this place. I'd hate to see another girl treated so callously.

Glad to hear your DD's interest is renewed. I'm hoping the same might happend with my DD. We'll see. I just can't believe how this woman treated her. You know how you have those experiences where you feel like you're watching it from outside your body? Kind of like shock I guess. I really wish I'd have said something right then and there but I don't like to confront people. Now my DH on the other hand would've had NO problem confronting this horse nazi! Have a great weekend!

 

[MichelleVW]

Thanks Michelle. I'm part of a yahoo group for homeschooling that is large (like 70+ families) so I think I'll send an email around to let people know about this place. I'd hate to see another girl treated so callously.

Glad to hear your DD's interest is renewed. I'm hoping the same might happend with my DD. We'll see. I just can't believe how this woman treated her. You know how you have those experiences where you feel like you're watching it from outside your body? Kind of like shock I guess. I really wish I'd have said something right then and there but I don't like to confront people. Now my DH on the other hand would've had NO problem confronting this horse nazi! Have a great weekend!

I understand totally about not doing anything right then...I think I would have been in shock too, especially at her first lesson.