Showers for all babies, or just the first?

[tkyes]

The SIL giving the shower, hadn't planned on doing it originally.

The SIL who's pregnant was offered a shower by someone on her husband's side of the family, then was told that she was no longer able to host the shower.

SIL was upset and her sister offered to have it instead since she was so upset.

I have absolutely no problem with celebrating the birth of my new nephew and will attend to do just that.

We already did give them a gift, as did the rest of their close family members.

I think this might be one of those situations where you have to know the people involved and how they react to these things.


Thanks for your opinions everyone - just wanted to know other's thoughts on the issue.

Tamie

 

[suzannen]

Okay, may I add another perspective. Although, there was a 14 year gap between my first DD and my second DD, when my friends wanted to throw me a shower for the second, I said "No way!"

During the early part of my pregnancy, a very close friend lost twins in her 9th month of pregnancy; another had a full term baby that was stillborn. Towards the end of my pregnancy, my SIL gave birth to my nephew who was born without an eye, blew out a lung and was in intensive care for 6 months. All of them had to deal with gifts that either had to be returned or put away until they knew the baby would survive. After seeing their incredible pain, I told my friends, I think it's great you want to help me celebrate this baby, but please let's wait until after the birth. Once she was born, I received the most lovely, thoughtful gifts without ever needing a party. Ever since these experiences, I have always been EXTREMELY uncomfortable at baby showers. Is it so horrible to wait and celebrate the actual birth instead of the "impending birth"?

But, if you must have a shower, I do think showers for 2nd and 3rd babies are usually on the tacky side.

 

[helenabear]

I must say many of my friends are guilty of throwing a shower for a 2nd and 3rd baby. The mother didn't ask for it, we just wanted to do it and celebrate the birth! I guess my thought is that if you think it is tacky, you don't have to attend. My friends though, just love to do things like this and it doesn't matter if it is the 1st or 12th kid, we just have a blast throwing them

 

[rbuzzotta]

My Dad's side of the family has baby showers. My Mom's side does not (they by a gift once the baby is born!! superstitious I guess).

I have 3 DD's and was given a small baby shower by some friends for DD #1 and again for DD #2!! There is 4 1/2 years between #1 and #2 and only 25 months between #2 and #3!!

I have been to baby showers that are like wedding showers and have wondered if the child that is born will actually be able to wear all the clothes he/she will get or even use all the stuff!!

I like to give gifts once the child is born and with that it is usually a Savings Bond!!!

 

[Banshee]

My sister in law had a situation, her family threw her a shower for her first her pregnancy was normal and great but sadly the baby passed a few hour's after birth. She wanted EVERYTHING removed from her house that even remotely seemed like a baby item,and it was given to good will. For her second we tried to have another shower and she REFUSED she felt like she already had one so it wouldnt be fair to have another!! And she did not want to jinx anything. A situation like that or a big age gap I believe would merit a second shower. But definately celebrate that baby! We celebrate all the baby's in our family with a little get together after the baby is born, and gift's are not a requirement.

 

[Tuffcookie]

I was given a 2nd shower because my DSs are 18 years apart!!!!

TC