Seats on the bus

[Disneylvr]

Frank that may be true but I would rather give the kid the benefit of possibly being on the spectrum then assuming he is a brat. He/she may very well just be a brat, but the rude remarks made to someone who is on the spectrum can impact their treatment goals. If DD is trying her best to act appropriately in a situation treating her like a brat is not going to help.

I know I've told this story on here before. My neice was yelled at by a woman in WDW for playing in a wheel chair. Basically told it should be used for someone who needed it. My neice has juvenile rheumatoid arthritis. Her mother convinced her to use a wheel chair because the pain was too much and this is what happened. She refused to go back to the parks after that. It has been several years and she still has not been back.

I could give you examples of my own DD but quite frankly some still bring tears to my eyes thinking about.

So yep I will continue to take responsibility for my family and will not judge others that I know nothing about.

Denise in MI

Thank you Denise for your post. My DD is on the spectrum and that is probably why I took such offense to FireDancer's post. The subject is very sensitive to me. Knowing how crowded and uncomfortable the buses can get we have chosen to rent a car and drive to the parks for the comfort of everyone involved. Should it be that way, I don't know.

 

[ocean134]

Here we go again....

Yup, grabbing mine too....

 

[dzorn]

I totally think it's rude. I won't sit there and glare at people because as previously stated, you don't know what issues that person may have. I wouldn't want someone to move who wasn't well. I also don't need anyone to move just because I have a kid. But some people clearly need a seat more than others.If you are an able person with no problems, and you will keep your butt in your seat just because you are tired too and you got there first (as many have stated they would throughout this thread). If you don't care that there is a 60+ year old woman, or a very pregnant womant, or a parent carrying a snoozing baby/toddler....yeah, I think it's rude. But it's your judgement call to be a jerk. I (and my family) will be the ones giving up our seat for those people everytime.

See I think it is rude to expect others who have waited in line for their turn and possibly for another bus to get up becasue some chose to ride a standing room only bus.

The person that waited for the seat is the one entitled to it. If they willingly give it up good for them.

I would also assume you always stand up on the bus because you never know who needs a seat more than you, unless you have the world medical records and can extract in a nano second.

Denise in MI

 

[dheinz]

The true measure of kindness & generosity is not how easy it is to help someone. In fact, it is how much you have to give up or endure in order to help your neighbor. Thus, sometimes doing the right thing is not always the easiest thing.

I can only assume that OP thought that able-bodied persons might give up a seat. I can assure you that myself, my husband, and my boys would have given you a seat for your sleepy babies. However, my sweet visually able-bodied 12 year old daughter would not, as she has injuries that would prevent her from doing so.
However as Rosa Parks taught us, we never know how hard a person may have worked that day or the troubles in their life. She was the first one to the seat and deserved it.

 

[FireDancer]

Your post is completely uncalled for and just plain rude.

It's what happens.

No one that has been here a while and is able to look at it objectively can possibly deny that on almost every thread, especially on the community board, the "hidden disability" or "on the spectrum" card is thrown out without any proof that it is the case.

Are they sometimes the case? Sure. Obviously both autism and hidden disabilities exits. Are they usually the case? Nope. Most people are normal hence the definition of normal: "The usual, average, or typical state or condition"

It's nothing personal, it just is what it is.

 

[ocean134]

not agaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaain

Yup...again.

 

[dzorn]

Thank you Denise for your post. My DD is on the spectrum and that is probably why I took such offense to FireDancer's post. The subject is very sensitive to me. Knowing how crowded and uncomfortable the buses can get we have chosen to rent a car and drive to the parks for the comfort of everyone involved. Should it be that way, I don't know.

We do rent a car on occasion but for MK you need to transfer to the TTC so we usually just bus it for that. We either leave at a low crowd time or if we are there at park close we get an ice cream, have a seat and wait for the bus lines to die down.

Denise in MI

 

[blondemom]

Maybe they should just take ALL the seats out of the bus and just put up railings. This way no one gets offended if they're not offered a seat and no one feels they will offend someone if they don't offer their seat. This could solve a lot of problems...

 

[sharadoc]

Thank you Denise for your post. My DD is on the spectrum and that is probably why I took such offense to FireDancer's post. The subject is very sensitive to me. Knowing how crowded and uncomfortable the buses can get we have chosen to rent a car and drive to the parks for the comfort of everyone involved. Should it be that way, I don't know.

We grapple with that all the time. My DS is 16 and is growing up so he's getting very tall. He has been yelled at for touching a woman in a shoulder to shoulder crowd at a parade when he had no idea what he was doing.

But, I am very sensitive to his behavior impacting others. It's why we drive, so as not to cause problems on a plane. He doesn't have behavior issues, UNLESS something upsets him, like whistling, or high pitched noises, or ... we don't know what causes it. Then it's rocking, gritting teeth, stimming his fingers so fast you can't see them, "odd" behavior to the casual observer.

On the other hand, I don't want to live my life by what others think. So we make sure we're aware of what situations to put him in, and where we'll all be comfortable and take it from there.

Anyone who feels they have a right to judge any kid's behavior, whether due to neurological or "environmental" reasons, is just selfish and closed-minded. You have no idea what we go through every day, don't judge our attempt at enjoying ourselves.

 

[Bonniec]

See I think it is rude to expect others who have waited in line for their turn and possibly for another bus to get up becasue some chose to ride a standing room only bus.

The person that waited for the seat is the one entitled to it. If they willingly give it up good for them.

I would also assume you always stand up on the bus because you never know who needs a seat more than you, unless you have the world medical records and can extract in a nano second.
Denise in MI

Denise, why are you trying to pick a fight with me? YES, I think it's rude to make a 9 month pregnant woman stand just because you got there first. If you are not sick or have issues, you should get up. It's called manners. Maybe you think it's okay to sit there, and that's your opinion. But I couldn't do that.

The part I bolded just makes no sense so Im not even sure how to respond.

In the end, I will always do the nice thing to people who need it.

 

[dzorn]

It's what happens.

No one that has been here a while and is able to look at it objectively can possibly deny that on almost every thread, especially on the community board, the "hidden disability" or "on the spectrum" card is thrown out without any proof that it is the case.

Are they sometimes the case? Sure. Obviously both autism and hidden disabilities exits. Are they usually the case? Nope. Most people are normal hence the definition of normal: "The usual, average, or typical state or condition"

It's nothing personal, it just is what it is.

Frank I think you also underestimate how many people with disabilities choose to vacation at Disney because Disney is more accomidating to those with disabilities.

Denise in MI

 

[Disneylvr]

We do rent a car on occasion but for MK you need to transfer to the TTC so we usually just bus it for that. We either leave at a low crowd time or if we are there at park close we get an ice cream, have a seat and wait for the bus lines to die down.

Denise in MI

DD has a special needs stroller that she can stay in on the monorail or boats (most of the time). Her's is not the type we could just roll onto a bus as it cannot be strapped down which is why we do drive to the MK (well, the TTC actually) and fold it for just the tram, where you definitely get a seat and no standing, and then take the monorail or ferry to the MK. With all the complaints about large strollers on the buses and people expecting those who appear "able bodied" to give up their seats, we will continue to rent a car and drive to all the parks. But like I said above, should it be that way? I don't know. I personally think standing shouldn't be allowed on the buses at all but from a budget standpoint, it would be very expensive for Disney to change it. Simply put, it ain't gonna happen.

 

[dzorn]

Denise, why are you trying to pick a fight with me? YES, I think it's rude to make a 9 month pregnant woman stand just because you got there first. If you are not sick or have issues, you should get up. It's called manners. Maybe you think it's okay to sit there, and that's your opinion. But I couldn't do that.


The part I bolded just makes no sense so Im not even sure how to respond.

In the end, I will always do the nice thing to people who need it.

But my point is you do not know who needs it.

If a woman is 9 months pregnant at disney then guess what shes healthy, if not then she would not be at disney. If she felt she needed a seat then wait for another bus.

But I do have issues and so does my DH and my DD none of which you would know by looking at us.

Denise in MI

 

[MsTinkerChele]

This doesn't surprise me. The older generations care more about manners in general. Manners are severely lacking nowadays. It's always about doing what is best for you and screw everyone else. It also makes it hard to teach your children why they have to be polite and give things up when no one else does. But what can ya do? we just go in expecting the rudeness from guests. We try to be polite wherever possible. And when someone goes out of their way for us, I make sure they know how thankful we are.

And sexist or not, my boys will always give up their seat or open a door for a girl. Screw equality. In my household, hubby and I are equal on some levels but he still has his manly duties and I still have my womanly duties. I.e. If I see a spider....his manly butt will take care of it!


ETA: sure seems like a lot of people are anti kids at Disney. Maybe kids just shouldn't be allowed to go. Or only during certain hours. sheesh....I'm goin to bed, lol.[/QUO

This is awesome.

 

[dzorn]

Maybe they should just take ALL the seats out of the bus and just put up railings. This way no one gets offended if they're not offered a seat and no one feels they will offend someone if they don't offer their seat. This could solve a lot of problems...

Except for those that do need seats.

Denise in MI

 

[Bonniec]

Yes but I am talking overall politeness. If you asked me for my seat because of x-reason, I would certainly give it up. Im talking about people who are fine and just dont care. Like I said, I would never glare at you if you sat, because as you said....how am I to know what problems you have. I just think its rude for someone to have the attitude of "Oh well, I got there first" as opposed to "Maybe I should be nice and give this person some help". Several people have stated in these threads that is exactly how they feel.

 

[FireDancer]

Frank I think you also underestimate how many people with disabilities choose to vacation at Disney because Disney is more accommodating to those with disabilities.

Denise in MI

Oh, I know. I still don't think it is anywhere near the majority.

It also isn't just Disney situations it happens on. Over on the community board you should see the stuff that is chalked up to the two assumptions I mentioned earlier.

I remember a thread about a neighbor who never drove the poster's daughter to any after-school activities despite the poster driving her daughter all the time. There was a post about maybe the neighbor is on the spectrum and doesn't know to ask. Really? That is the logical assumption? You also have people who leave their carts in the middle of parking lots because "they have a hidden disability". No, usually they are just too lazy to take them back to the cart corral.

I was just letting a newer poster know that it happens here because it does. It isn't meant to belittle anyone or anything.

I don't say anything to seemingly normal people who won't give up the seat on the bus but I also don't assume they aren't doing it because of some hidden disability. I don't really care either way, I only worry about me.

 

[LilyWDW]

If there is no difference between moving bus and firm ground in line, then I do not see why anyone holding a baby would need to sit, people hold babies in lines all the time, strollers are parked outside as far as I remember.

Good catch!

Second: Whenever people say they always take the bus at WDW because they're on vacation and riding the bus is so much more relaxing, I think about these give-up-your-seat-drama threads. Every time I read one, it reminds me why I love just heading to my vehicle at the end of a long park day.

What is funny is I have never seen these issues when actually there. Usually it only comes up because someone was looking for a problem (expecting a seat on a bus perhaps). It is actually very rare for there is actually BE any sort of problems on the buses. However, this is a discussion board so someone who posts something as opinionated and multisided as this should expect people to call them out and have other opinions.

It's what happens.

No one that has been here a while and is able to look at it objectively can possibly deny that on almost every thread, especially on the community board, the "hidden disability" or "on the spectrum" card is thrown out without any proof that it is the case.

Are they sometimes the case? Sure. Obviously both autism and hidden disabilities exits. Are they usually the case? Nope. Most people are normal hence the definition of normal: "The usual, average, or typical state or condition"

It's nothing personal, it just is what it is.

The only reason I brought up my issue (my "hidden disability" so to say) is to give an example. I am not saying I deserve a seat any more then any other person, no would I ever expect one if I got on a full bus. It is simply to explain how someone who "looks" fine can actually not "be" fine and how it is rude to make a judgement of someone based off of looks.

I will be one of the first to admit that most likely not everyone sitting on the bus has a disability. However, simply calling all of them rude just because no one would stand is just as rude.

Denise, why are you trying to pick a fight with me? YES, I think it's rude to make a 9 month pregnant woman stand just because you got there first. If you are not sick or have issues, you should get up. It's called manners. Maybe you think it's okay to sit there, and that's your opinion. But I couldn't do that.

The part I bolded just makes no sense so Im not even sure how to respond.

In the end, I will always do the nice thing to people who need it.

Then why did the 9 month pregnant woman get ON the bus if she needed a seat? Shouldn't she have taken some personal responsibility and done something to make sure she got a seat if it was so badly needed? Isn't it just as rude to get on a bus with expectations and then judge those around you who don't do what you want?

 

[mefordis]

Yep, I agree. And no way is this post rude.

I see, you are new here. What you will notice is that on the DIS the abnormal is the normal and the exception becomes the rule.

In almost every situation it will be assumed a kid that can't behave is "on the spectrum" and not just acting like a brat despite the fact that the vast majority of kids are completely normal but misbehave from time to time. It will be assumed that every normal looking person has a hidden disability even though the vast majority of people just don't.

It is just how it goes.

 

[dzorn]

Yes but I am talking overall politeness. If you asked me for my seat because of x-reason, I would certainly give it up. Im talking about people who are fine and just dont care. Like I said, I would never glare at you if you sat, because as you said....how am I to know what problems you have. I just think its rude for someone to have the attitude of "Oh well, I got there first" as opposed to "Maybe I should be nice and give this person some help". Several people have stated in these threads that is exactly how they feel.

But is it polite to ask I say no, because I should not have to explain my situation or justify my sitting to anyone. There is no reason for a stranger to know my medical condition. If I need a seat I need a seat. And I have waited for another bus for just that reason. We have also rented a car when we feel it is necesary. If you need a seat you should plan appropriately and not expect others to move because you did not take personal responsibility.

If someone wants to give up their seat more power to them, but if everyone took personal responsibility it would not be necessary. If someone whats to go out of their way to help a fellow traveler then good for them, but I will not judge others that have waited their turn and feel they need to sit for whatever reason.

Denise in MI