School Reading Program

[LittleMissMickey]

Okay, so I haven't posted on this thread in awhile, but I had a question...

Would you lie for your child on their school reading program to help them get the big prize?

I teach Kindergarten in a district where most of the families are doing quite well just outside of the suburbs. Just last month we began our M.A.G.I.C. Reading Program (Make A Giant Impact on Children). The goal is to have children read a little bit each day. At the end of each month a prize cart comes around and the kids get to pick from different prize selections for the amount they've read. Every child will get a prize.

Anyway, a couple weeks ago a mom came to me and said, "Ashley, I just don't have any time to read to my kids! How do parents do it? I feel bad that we've not really participated in the program." This was two weeks into the program. Later, when I was going through folders and putting them in mailboxes, the mom said, "Oh, I guess I DO read to my kids, but I wish I could do it more." I look down to see that she had written 30 minutes on each day. She had openly admitted that she had asked her husband to go read to their four year old daughter and that he didn't know what to do.

Now I don't know what to do. This family lied and now the child has logged more minutes than any other child in my class. He is going to get to go have a meeting with the principal and get the big prize package for being in the 600 Club.

Is it a shame that parents teach their children to lie at such an early age? Am I looking too far into this? I just wonder what kind of an "impact" these parents think this will have on their kids...

Thanks for reading, if you are still with me! I look forward to your responses...
Ashley

 

[luvthatduke]

Well, my answer is a resounding, "NO!" I would not lie.
Shame on that mom for doing that,
and I'll bet she'll be the first one in a year or two saying,
"My little girl, lying? Wherever did she learn that?"

What an awkward position you're now in, also.
I don't have any real advice, except to suggest
that you discuss it with your principal and let he/she
know what you know and maybe you both can come up with a plan?

 

[dbarker]

no flames. just another thought. Maybe the mom realized how important this program was and found the time to read. Maybe have the principal or counselor speak w/ the child to find out the truth and then let them make that call. (most children are brutally honest that age)

Also, it could be that the mom is the only one reading, and the dad is not a very participative parent (my ex was like that--totally clueless when it came to our DS)

To answer your question, no I would not lie. But my son would probably guilt me into reading to him so he could get a prize. DS6 is very motivated by positive reinforcement (prizes, stickers, etc.) And if there is a prize from the teacher involved he does not let up until he is satisfied that he will get that prize.

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

I have to say no, I wouldn't lie. I remember doing the 600 minutes reading club thing when I was in elementary school and getting scolded (by my parents,who only wanted us to do the bare min,not by the teacher,who was happy I read for like 3 hours every day) for doing MORE than 600 minutes. I read every book I could get my hands on and am hopefully teaching Bugs to do the same because I read to him at least a half hour every night at bedtime.

And I don't read just children's books. We've made our way through HP book 1, Lemony Snicket book 1, Redwall and several other books that I happen to like (including Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood which got me into trouble with my MIL ).

TOV

 

[barkley]

i don't let my kids participate in these types of programs. i've told their teachers/principal that i don't believe in rewards or prizes for what i believe should be a regular part of their education. my kids are not happy with my position on this, but i do have 2 children who read for the purpose of learning as well as a love of books in general. i see nothing wrong with setting a goal and then celebrating EVERYONE who participated in working towards that goal, but i do not feel that "prizes" should be the initiative.

 

[aprilgail2]

We have 2 major programs like that a year and normally my daughter is at the top of the minutes read for the whole class....and YES...we do read all those minutes..there are some nights where we read together for 2 hours or more so the goal last year was 60 minutes a week for a month...well we did those in 2 nights...I would not write down what she did not read though, she loves reading and these programs encourage her to read even more which is great...we have parents as reading partners., web books program and in the library in the summer she does the summer reading program and at the end all the kid who met their goal get a cool party...also last year Six Flag has something where if you read for 6 hours in the month you got a free six flags ticket through your kids school so we did that too...

 

[eeyore kelly]

I wouldn't lie, and the parent that did lie is teaching her child a lesson that you lie to get what you want. If I was the teacher, I would mention it to the principal. It is just not fair for this child to get rewarded for the parent lying.

 

[swilphil]

It's terrible that a parent would lie about such a thing. I would call or e-mail the parent and say I needed to clarify the number of minutes that were read. The mom may not have realized that her child was going to get the big prize. She probably just wrote down 30 minutes each day to put something down. Now it is possible that they started reading to the child that much, but your instincts are probably right.

 

[Toby'sFriend]

I understand your suspicions, but I don't think there is really anything you can do about it.

I am really bad about filling out those sheets also. Usually I sit down the night before they are due and try to remember what reading my kids have done. I don't like to turn free reading into homework and I really don't like "paying" them for it. It makes it seem like it is something that they shouldn't want to do --- like being promised desert if you eat broccolli or something.

 

[disneymom3]

I don't like to turn free reading into homework and I really don't like "paying" them for it. It makes it seem like it is something that they shouldn't want to do --- like being promised desert if you eat broccolli or something.

First to the OP, I like the idea of talking to your principal about this and letting it be his or her call. How sad for this child that not only is their parent lying and they obviously must be aware of it, but that they have parents who can't take 10 min to read to their kids everyday. Have they never heard of a bedtime story??

Toby'sFriend--I sooo agree with this. DD is an avid reader--reads two to three books a week and on occassion, I feel she really needs to do a book report basically so she knows how to do them. I think it's an important skill. (We homeschool.) What I have found though is that I can't tell her ahead of time which book she will be writing a report on because then the reading is no longer fun. I generally will just announce the day after she finishes a book that I would like a report done on it. Personally I think a love of reading for the sake of reading is one of the things that takes kids far in the world and I don't want it to need to be rewarded. The reading itself is the reward. We have the program to do the Pizza Hut Book It program this year and DD asked what our goal was for each month. I told her it was to read read read and read some more. Then at the end of each month, they tell me what their favorite book is they have read recently and we talk about what makes it a great book.

 

[disykat]

I too wonder if she just wrote down "30 minutes" as an "I don't want my child to get in trouble for not participating" thing. I'd be tempted to call her and prenotify her of the win (if the principal decides to let her win) so she'd have a chance to backpedal if she chooses.

 

[Skylarr29]

I wqould not lie because then my children would learn to lie.. lead by example. Just because I wouldnt doesnt mean that mom didnt..... but it may not have been intential on her part.. she may have just wanted to look like they participated etc.