Scared of planes....seeking advice.

[Dylan_&_Blake's_mom]

Ok, I have never been on a plane before and vowed that I never would. However, we hope to go back to WDW this year and it normally takes us 2 full days in the car to get there(with kids). It about makes me sick when I heard we could be in Orlando 4 hours from leaving our airport if we would just fly. Needless to say I am tyring my hardest to convince myself to bite the bullet. I am SCARED OUT OF MY MIND about plane rides though, always have been. I am looking for any advice, encouragement, etc. from either people who fly all the time(so I could see people make it all the time,lol) and people who maybe were scared but took their first flight. Any photos, tips on what to do to calm my nerves, anything would be VERY much appreciated. Also, we would be taking our 3 boys ( 10,7 and 18 months at the time) so advice on planes with kids or kids first flights would also be appreciated. Thanks in advance to all who respond!!

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

My DH is an aircraft mechanic, so we fly all the time.

Why are you afraid to fly? You actually have a better chance of being in a car accident then a plane crash.

Its difficult to know what to say to you unless I know your reasoning of why you are scared to fly.

 

[Not so Dumbo]

I was exactly in your shoes back in December 2006. That's when I had to get on my first plane to fly to WDW with DH and all 3 kids. DH ended up taking care of the oldest two and I had my DD (who was still a baby) in the baby bjorn carrier(yes, they let me wear it) My doctor prescribed Xanex 50mg and that made me so tired and in la la land that I honestly didn't care what happend on or to the plane. My DD slept the whole trip too, so it worked out great for me. DH on the other hand had his hands full. We had horrible turbulance taking off from DTW and he was sick to his stomach the whole flight on top of having to manage the boys.
I guess what I'm saying is, see if you can get your doc to prescribe you something. It was the only way that I was able to get on the plane. Also, if you are nervous before hand just try to put it out of your mind. If I really start to think about it, I still get overwhelmed and shakey so when I find myself starting to think about the actual flight I just stop and put it out of my mind. Good luck... if I could do it you can too.

 

[Dylan_&_Blake's_mom]

My DH is an aircraft mechanic, so we fly all the time.

Why are you afraid to fly? You actually have a better chance of being in a car accident then a plane crash.

Its difficult to know what to say to you unless I know your reasoning of why you are scared to fly.

I'm scared of the actual flight. The whole being in the air and possibility of crashing down to earth thing,lol. i have heard that a million times about the car crash thing and you think that would help but it doesn't. My thing is that there are LOTS more cars on the rode than planes flying so that's why there are more car wrecks. I don't know, I guess it's hard to understand the fear of flying unless you have it. Thanks for trying though.

 

[Dylan_&_Blake's_mom]

I was exactly in your shoes back in December 2006. That's when I had to get on my first plane to fly to WDW with DH and all 3 kids. DH ended up taking care of the oldest two and I had my DD (who was still a baby) in the baby bjorn carrier(yes, they let me wear it) My doctor prescribed Xanex 50mg and that made me so tired and in la la land that I honestly didn't care what happend on or to the plane. My DD slept the whole trip too, so it worked out great for me. DH on the other hand had his hands full. We had horrible turbulance taking off from DTW and he was sick to his stomach the whole flight on top of having to manage the boys.
I guess what I'm saying is, see if you can get your doc to prescribe you something. It was the only way that I was able to get on the plane. Also, if you are nervous before hand just try to put it out of your mind. If I really start to think about it, I still get overwhelmed and shakey so when I find myself starting to think about the actual flight I just stop and put it out of my mind. Good luck... if I could do it you can too.

Thank you so much for the advice. I already told my husband that I would have to be drugged for sure in order to do it,lol. I'm glad to know there is something they can give you for it. Your kids aren't too far off in age from mine. That's pretty neat. How did the older two do? I keep getting myself convinced I can do it but I know that when we get to the airport I will try to escape at every entrance,lol.I guess I would just have to let the medicine kick in before we got there. So glad to hear that their are other people who conquered the fear of flying also. Thanks again.

 

[karajeboo]

I have flown a bazillion times, but ever since my DD was born, I'm scared to death. The last time we flew was also the first time DH and I went away without DD - to Jamaica! I was a basket case. I have had to fly for business, too. As long as DD flies with me, I'm okay (I don't like it, but it's okay). But I like what the pp said about the prescription. That is what I should have done, and I'll do it next time. I tried to be brave and it was stupid.

DH tells me all the time that my fears are irrational, and they probably are, but they are MY fears, right? So talk to your Dr, especially if it's a 4 hour flight. You'll sleep the whole way and wake up in (ok, really CLOSE to) the happiest place on earth!

 

[JeremyGNJ]

Just think about how much you put your kids at risk DRIVING thousands of miles on high-speed roads, compared to the slim slim slim chance of ever having even an incident on an airplane.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

I'm very nervous about flying and have only flown 5 times in my life. I live in NJ and work in NYC, 2 blocks from Ground Zero. After 9/11 I swore I'd NEVER get on a plane again; fastforward to 2005. I wanted to go to Disney SOOOOO bad and I refused to drive from NJ, so there I was, on a plane. Unlike most people, I love the take off and landing, and hate the actual flying part, but I hated the idea of spending 24 hours driving, and then being so wiped out by the time we got to Disney that I wouldn't enjoy myself. 9/11 taught me all about picking myself up by my bootstraps and pushing forward. I'm so glad I faced that fear and got back on a plane. I flew in 2005, 2006 and we're going back to Disney this summer. If it's my time, it's going to happen no matter where I am. Life's too short to worry about the "what ifs". Get on that plane, go to Disney and enjoy yourself. Just be cognizant of the fact that your fears might affect your kids. If mom's worried, obviously there is something to be worried about. Take a prescription if you can, and bring along an IPod or a good book -- something to try to divert your attention. Good luck!

 

[karajeboo]

Just think about how much you put your kids at risk DRIVING thousands of miles on high-speed roads, compared to the slim slim slim chance of ever having even an incident on an airplane.

OK, you are right, and I know you're right, but here's my argument. When my car breaks down I can pull over to the side of the road. When a plane breaks down it's not like there's a cloud to stop on! I know, I know, I'm being irrational. And I'm sorry I'm not helping to alleviate your fears. But you are right about people not understanding the fear if they don't have it.

What helps calm me somewhat is the people that I know that fly weekly - I even know a pilot who flies all the time! And they show up at home after every trip. So I know it's safe. But then, there's the fear.... So I know exactly how you feel!

 

[karajeboo]

I'm very nervous about flying and have only flown 5 times in my life. I live in NJ and work in NYC, 2 blocks from Ground Zero. After 9/11 I swore I'd NEVER get on a plane again; fastforward to 2005. I wanted to go to Disney SOOOOO bad and I refused to drive from NJ, so there I was, on a plane. Unlike most people, I love the take off and landing, and hate the actual flying part, but I hated the idea of spending 24 hours driving, and then being so wiped out by the time we got to Disney that I wouldn't enjoy myself. 9/11 taught me all about picking myself up by my bootstraps and pushing forward. I'm so glad I faced that fear and got back on a plane. I flew in 2005, 2006 and we're going back to Disney this summer. If it's my time, it's going to happen no matter where I am. Life's too short to worry about the "what ifs". Get on that plane, go to Disney and enjoy yourself. Just be cognizant of the fact that your fears might affect your kids. If mom's worried, obviously there is something to be worried about. Take a prescription if you can, and bring along an IPod or a good book -- something to try to divert your attention. Good luck!

Good for you! You are exactly right! Also, you are correct about not letting the kids feel the fear.

 

[fortheluvofpooh]

I too hate to fly, but do it anyway. We have only ever had great experiences on the flights, but still I am terrified. I too take a rx for the flight. It does help. If only I could take it everyday up to and including the flight. I actually don't have a fear of flying, I have a fear of not being in control, dying, crashing. So I guess you could say I love to fly, just hate the other stuff.

 

[Tink-n-Belle]

I used to Love to Fly and actually wanted to be a flight attendant but now I get very nervous especially since I've had kids.

However, given the alternative of 3 days in the car I much rather fly 3 hours . I usually fly at least twice a year with my most recent flight 10 days ago. What has helped me so much is a book called "Flying without Fear" by Browne--- you can probably get it from Amazon.com.

It explains everything and give you coping techniques to use on the plane. It explains all the noises, take off, turbulence and air pockets etc. My biggest concern while flying is taking off- but the book take you through step by step so you know that after you actually take off and feel like you are falling it is actually suppose to feel that way. Its a great book.

While you are flying make sure you bring gum for the older kids and bottles for your younger one. When you take off and land pressure builds in your ears which is alleviated when you chew and swallow. A little girl on our last flight fell asleep and when she work up she had a terrible earache. But I have found that if we chew gum or suck a bottle we don't have a problem.

While you are on the plane, make sure you bring something that makes you relax. You may want to bring an ipod, hand held video game or even an audio book that will distract you to the fact that you are on a plane. A few years ago, when my flying anxiety really peaked, Song (Delta) had planes that had TV's and with the combination of the above book and the TV's flying became a breeze. I actually got so caught up in the trivia game I was playing against all the other passengers that I was so happy when they announced that Pres Bush was waiting to take off and we couldn't land until he did and we had to circle for about 20 minutes. (I was like Oh good I get one more chance to come in first) If you don't want to take a heavy duty drug to get you thru the flight you may relax just by taking an Advil. they used to help me relax preflight too. See what works for you in everyday stressful situations. Maybe a Latte calms you or a stiff drink!!

When pilots are asked what the most dangerous part of the flight is they all response ---the trip to the Airport!! And it is true. In the last month over 1 million planes have taken off and landed safely just in the US. Over 12 million flights per year!! Yes I know its make so much sense that flying is safe but it still causes so much anxiety. (I still am afraid, but have reduced my anxiety alot) Just think of it a transportation, Just like getting on a bus at Disney and being driven to the parks. Really, we all just hop on the bus and none of us knows anything about the bus drivers accident history or health history but we all don't fret about that -- And just how many bus drivers do we trust down in Disney? Same goes for substitute bus drivers we entrust with our kids. Or how about the Tower of Terror or the RnRC.

Since you have never flown, you may find that you absolutely LOVE it. Then you can help me next year prepare for my next flight!! GOOD LUCK!!

 

[stacy6552]

Ok here's some crazy info that may put your mind at ease. Did you know that a plane on autopilot will recognize that its reached its destination and can put itself in a holding pattern waiting for hte pilot to take over and land? Planes have anti stall features that can save a plane when a pilot might not. A plane can coast for as much as 15 minutes and land without power. I am a regular flyer but every time I hear these stories I am amazed at just how advanced and yes SAFE planes really are.

As for your own flight, I say educate yourself about what scares you. It always makes me feel easier when I'm a girl with a plan. Stuff like count the seat backs between you and an exit, in case you can't see during an emergency. But ALL of your children tickets and put the baby in a FAA approved carseat for the flight (coffee pots are required to be strapped down, make sure your chilren are too). And of course dont forget the valume.

 

[Tink-n-Belle]

OK, you are right, and I know you're right, but here's my argument. When my car breaks down I can pull over to the side of the road. When a plane breaks down it's not like there's a cloud to stop on! I know, I know, I'm being irrational. And I'm sorry I'm not helping to alleviate your fears. But you are right about people not understanding the fear if they don't have it.

What helps calm me somewhat is the people that I know that fly weekly - I even know a pilot who flies all the time! And they show up at home after every trip. So I know it's safe. But then, there's the fear.... So I know exactly how you feel!

You haven't seen the new plane repair stations on cloud 9?

the book I suggested to the OP "Flying without Fear" address the problem of having trouble in the air. Did you know that a plane can lose both engines and not crash, because they are designed to glide. Now if my plane lost both engines I'd be flipping out but the plane won't be According to the book, even if they lost an engine on take off the plane won't crash. Also, another thing the book says that make me feel better is that we actually fly under a column of air. If you ever stuck your hand out the window while driving down the road we create that column of air under our hand -- If you have ever done it, do you know what I'm taking about-- how you hand is just floating and if you angle your hand up or down it moves in that direction but doesn't crash down. It you haven't done it, try it.-- its pretty cool. I guess its the law of physics.

 

[disnut1149]

Hi
I hate to fly also!! Just get a prescription for Xanax and 20 minutes before you get on the plane, take one and you'll be asleep the entire time. I wake up when I get to Orlando. It's the only way to fly. (Otherwise, I'd never fly anywhere)!!

 

[Harvestmooner]

I am also very fearful of flying. I started seeing someone about this issue in the hopes that I could fly on our next trip. My person has made me cd's to help me get through the anxiety. And it is really good to educate yourself about flying and planes. I have even taken several trips to the local airport to become familiar with the layout and the whole process and to watch planes land and take off. It seems to help.
There are also some really good sites on line where you can read about flying and overcoming your fear. One site is www.anxieties.com/flying.
Also, know you can get some help in medication form from your doctor if you need it.
GOOD LUCK!!!!
it is now one of my goals-so I can fly to Disneyland!!!

 

[SarahKate]

Yep, fear of flying is totally, 100% irrational. When was the last commercial airplane that crashed where there were fatalities in the U.S.? When was the last fatal car accident? Fatal car accidents happen ALL the time all over the place.

I think what a lot of people have a problem with is the whole control thing. But when you're in a car, are you REALLY in control? Yeah, you can avoid accidents some of the time. If you're on an interstate (whcih would be a huge part of a drive to WDW from where we are) going 65-70 MPH and get into an accident, it's gonna be a BAD one most likely.

Do I love flying? Nope. As I've gotten older, I've gotten more and more anxious about flying. BUT, I'm actually even MORE anxious about driving. On a plane, I hate turbulence. But I can convince myself that turbulence is totally, 100% normal and can actually help the pilots fly the plane. And with the constant "hum" in the plane, I can usually doze off a little bit. My DD is now 5.5 but she flew at 3.5 and 4.5 years old - she did FANTASTIC. I think that helps me a ton.

With your kids, it is so VERY important to not let them see your fear. If I'm ever scared of something, I'll talk things through with her but really try not to seem fearful to her.

You can always medicate yourself. Talk to your doctor. Maybe he can prescribe somethign for you.

My friend and her family are flying to WDW for the first time later this year. Her husband has never flown and has been VERY scared. But she told him if he wanted to go back to WDW, they will NOT drive this time. So he has agreed to fly and will be taking something before the flight to calm his nerves. And they have two kids who have "lived in fear" of flying too, so they now have this ingrained.

I think taking that step and actually FLYING is going to help you overcome it (best way is to FACE your fear!) - you may never love to fly, and that's ok. But you will LOVE getting to your destination much quicker.

 

[CastleCreations]

As a nurse, I really can't recommend taking medication when you will need to be alert enough to look after your children, but what about doing some relaxation exercises at home, (find a happy place, as nemo's friends say) maybe through music or breathing exercises. Then while in the air, maybe put your hubby in charge of the kids, and get a seperate seat away from them, and pop in your ipod, and deep breathe your way to Florida.
Although, maybe having the children to take care of will distract you.

 

[Dylan_&_Blake's_mom]

OK, you are right, and I know you're right, but here's my argument. When my car breaks down I can pull over to the side of the road. When a plane breaks down it's not like there's a cloud to stop on! I know, I know, I'm being irrational. And I'm sorry I'm not helping to alleviate your fears. But you are right about people not understanding the fear if they don't have it.

What helps calm me somewhat is the people that I know that fly weekly - I even know a pilot who flies all the time! And they show up at home after every trip. So I know it's safe. But then, there's the fear.... So I know exactly how you feel!

Too funny! It sounds like you are a lot like me. I really do know that it's an irrational fear but I can't help it. That is what I try to think about also, all the people that fly all the time and always come back safely. Thank you so much for your advice!

 

[Dylan_&_Blake's_mom]

I'm very nervous about flying and have only flown 5 times in my life. I live in NJ and work in NYC, 2 blocks from Ground Zero. After 9/11 I swore I'd NEVER get on a plane again; fastforward to 2005. I wanted to go to Disney SOOOOO bad and I refused to drive from NJ, so there I was, on a plane. Unlike most people, I love the take off and landing, and hate the actual flying part, but I hated the idea of spending 24 hours driving, and then being so wiped out by the time we got to Disney that I wouldn't enjoy myself. 9/11 taught me all about picking myself up by my bootstraps and pushing forward. I'm so glad I faced that fear and got back on a plane. I flew in 2005, 2006 and we're going back to Disney this summer. If it's my time, it's going to happen no matter where I am. Life's too short to worry about the "what ifs". Get on that plane, go to Disney and enjoy yourself. Just be cognizant of the fact that your fears might affect your kids. If mom's worried, obviously there is something to be worried about. Take a prescription if you can, and bring along an IPod or a good book -- something to try to divert your attention. Good luck!

You are very brave for getting over that fear living so close to the 9/11 incident. That is another thing that has scared me about flying. I do keep telling myself the same thing though, if it's my time..it's my time regardless. Also, I am really trying to act unafraid for my kids sake. Unfortunately the oldest is already scared about it and I'm sure it's my fault I just didn't think about it. I'm trying to fix that now and it's actually helping me convince myself. Thanks a lot for the advice.