Santa Claus and 9 year old?

[princesspumpkin]

Now that one of DD's friends has mentioned that there is no Santa, I am waiting for her to ask me if it is true. I have spoken to DH who wants us to say that Santa is real, but I feel that children should learn at some point, so if she asks, I would tell her the truth. I wouldn't just come up to her ans say "Ya know, Santa isn't real", but if she tells me that her friend said that Santa isn't, and she asks me if it's true, I feel that it's time to tell her the truth. What do you feel? BTW, DH says he still believes, so he's not much help!

 

[tjmw2727]

I had this happen last year with dd 10 - the best thing I did was sit back and let dd take the lead. I am soooo glad I did as she just wasnt' ready to give up yet. We were on the way home from Choir practice when one of the kids in the carpool proceeded to tell the story of how her dad told her that the tooth fairy, santa, Easter bunny etc were really the parents. Luckily she was the first drop off and I had a chance to talk to the others, including dd's other best friend then 9, her sister then 8 and my youngest then 7, UGGH

My dd's 9yo best friend asked me - Mrs _____ what was she talking about? I was so dumb struck that I just asked questions and said - I don't know what do you guys think? They proceeded to give me many many examples of things that happened in their lives that gave them reason to believe. I summarized it by saying something like "I beleive in all the magic of Christmas including Santa Clause.

My dd's friends Mom called to ask me what in the world happend and thanked me on handling it. Honestly I don't know how I did it so on the spot.

I would ask questions and see if your child is ready or wants some more convinicing. She/He could have a few more years and you don't have to lie.

TJ

 

[dmslush]

I never actually told my dd that he was not real and she never asked. When she got about 7 or 8, we really started talking more about santa and the spirit of giving. She is 14 today, and she still gets gifts from Santa under the tree.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

She's 9? I'm surprised it's taken this long! Time to 'fess up!

 

[KAMLEM]

9 is not too old to believe. Some kids are more naive than others and personally I think it's fine for them to be naive when it comes to this. There is too much pressure on them to grow up quickly. Let them be kids.

 

[graygables]

We had a don't ask don't tell policy growing up. Actually my brothers threatened me if I said anything b/c then we wouldn't get "the good stuff" anymore.

My DDs have never mentioned it, either, although the now 17yo said something one year while thanking "Santa" for a gift, she thanked me instead and I just shrugged and said, "I don't know what you're talking about" Our youngest are 9 & 7 and we've had a few moments of so-and-so doesn't believe in Santa, and we say how sad for them, b/c Santa is so magical and his gifts remind us of the love that came the first Christmas.

I'm hoping that I'm never directly asked, but I will also never tell my DDs that there is no Santa. Even as an adult, there's still that sparkle of magic by not having it blown by "the truth".

 

[Alice28]

My 8 year old is teetering- he says his friends say there's no Santa and it's just your parents. I said, "Well, what do you think?" He says, "I think there's Santa..." So I don't discourage him. Santa only gives the kids one medium gift anyway- it's not like they expect Santa to bring all the gifts. He'll figure it out soon enough, right?

 

[casey49781]

first off, i have no problems what so ever to let a kid believe in as long as they want. kids grow up way to fast these days,,my friends daughter who is 9 came home from school the other day and she was faced with the same thing , she told her it was all in what she believed in and what was in her heart, she used the some people believe in GOD and some don't example and that it was totally up to the 9yr old to decide, and that no one is wrong for what they believe in,,,and that was the end of the conversation between them,,,,my daughter is 8 and this yr she asked me how come i never buy her anything for christmas, because i only put there names on the packages and not the from part so this yr will do that,,i dont have a santa house at christmas mostly snowman but i do take them to see santa and give him a list....

 

[Disneyglobegirl]

She's 9? I'm surprised it's taken this long! Time to 'fess up!

My 9 year old still believes. Why make them grow up to fast?

 

[Dislifer]

She's 9? I'm surprised it's taken this long! Time to 'fess up!

WHY?????? And...BTW...why do you feel it necessary to post a picture of your daughter on the internet??? Just curious. Really...I don't mean to sound malicious, but I do wonder with all the horrible internet stories, why do people put their children's pictures on line?????

 

[clh2]

DD and I had that conversation about 3 years ago.

She would ask a question - I answered: well, what do you think?
She asked another question...I answered: well, what do you think?
This went on for about 10-15 minutes.

She finally said..."well because of fact 1, fact 2, fact 3 etc. There must not be a Santa".

I answered back that she was sort of correct, and explained that Santa part of the magic of Christmas, and that is why it is so important for us to do nice things- like Toys for Tots - at Christmas so that other kids can experience the magic of Christmas too.

The conversation ended with a comment like - well I guess there will always be Santa - he just looks different than I always thought - and then DD went on to describe me.

 

[tiggerlover]

DS has been questioning about Santa since he was about 7 (he is 9 now). My reply to him has pretty much been the same.....those who believe in Santa will receive gifts from Santa. It isn't a lie and it is fun to believe...heck I still believe. I agree that kids are forced to grow up faster these days. I think having a little magic in ones life is a good thing.

 

[RUDisney]

I'm 39. My parents have still not told me there is no Santa.

I must admit, each year, when I'm setting up all of the gifts under the tree for our kids, there is a part of me that bubbles with the excitement that Santa will come down the chimney.

BTW, we combine our presents with what Santa brings. That way, it helps to explain why we get so many packages in the mail. The kids just don't know what was in them compared to what Santa brought. Also, Santa is nice enough to wrap everything in the same paper.

 

[damo]

I always said there was a Santa. If they still are young enough to ask your opinion about Santa, they are still young enough to believe.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

DS has been questioning about Santa since he was about 7 (he is 9 now).

Same with dd except it is all over with. She adamently wanted to know when she was 8. She isn't into all the gifts and things so she is actually happy that we don't have to pretend anymore.
Now 14yodd refuses to give up on Santa, she wants gifts from him. She follows the "believe to receive" philosophy.

 

[va32h]

Here's what I told dd9 about Santa (which was later applied to Tooth Fairy & Easter Bunny):

She had pretty much guessed, but I took her out for ice cream and said "what I am about to tell you is a secret that you can only share when you grow up and have your own children".

I explained that Santa had lived a long time ago, and was no longer alive. But members of the "Santa Club" carried on his spirit of giving. I explained that I was a member, and that she was now old enough to know the secret, and join the club. Club members get to make special shopping trips for Santa presents, and stay up late "playing Santa" for little children everywhere. She was so excited about feeling grown up, and being in the club, and staying up late, that she didn't really mind learning the truth. Especially when I reassured her that she would still get presents.

Just curious. Really...I don't mean to sound malicious, but I do wonder with all the horrible internet stories, why do people put their children's pictures on line?????

I'm not Chrisnsteph, but I want to answer. What "horrible internet stories"? Are they any worse than horrible incidents that occur in neighborhoods all over America? The chance of a pedophile finding a picture on the internet and tracking down the child is surely smaller than the chance that any given neighborhood contains at least one pedophile. Why should a molester go to the trouble of searching for and travelling to one child when he can stroll over the the local park and have his pick of many.

Personal info is on the web. Personal info is also on a check one writes at the grocery store. A pervert could see my daughter in the Albertson's, stand behing me in line and copy my address from my check. Or just follow me home. Would you ask "why do people take their children to the grocery store"?

A child could be followed home from school. "Why do parents let their children walk home from school"? Or molested by the parent of a friend. 'Why do parents let their children go into other people's houses?"

In Las Vegas, a man was convicted for visiting the local Wet & Wild (which has since closed) and filming young girls in their bathing suits. Why do people take their children out in public in bathing suits?

If you have ever allowed your child to be seen by any other person, you may have exposed your child to a molester. So one can either lock their child up, or calculate the risks involved, and act accordingly.

People put their child's photos online because they want to, for whatever reasons that they really don't have to justify to anyone else.

 

[Lil_Tink]

Lol. I went through that and my parents said "What do you think, you can just figure that out yourself"

 

[Lil_Tink]

Here's what I told dd9 about Santa (which was later applied to Tooth Fairy & Easter Bunny):

She had pretty much guessed, but I took her out for ice cream and said "what I am about to tell you is a secret that you can only share when you grow up and have your own children".

I explained that Santa had lived a long time ago, and was no longer alive. But members of the "Santa Club" carried on his spirit of giving. I explained that I was a member, and that she was now old enough to know the secret, and join the club. Club members get to make special shopping trips for Santa presents, and stay up late "playing Santa" for little children everywhere. She was so excited about feeling grown up, and being in the club, and staying up late, that she didn't really mind learning the truth. Especially when I reassured her that she would still get presents.



I'm not Chrisnsteph, but I want to answer. What "horrible internet stories"? Are they any worse than horrible incidents that occur in neighborhoods all over America? The chance of a pedophile finding a picture on the internet and tracking down the child is surely smaller than the chance that any given neighborhood contains at least one pedophile. Why should a molester go to the trouble of searching for and travelling to one child when he can stroll over the the local park and have his pick of many.

Personal info is on the web. Personal info is also on a check one writes at the grocery store. A pervert could see my daughter in the Albertson's, stand behing me in line and copy my address from my check. Or just follow me home. Would you ask "why do people take their children to the grocery store"?

A child could be followed home from school. "Why do parents let their children walk home from school"? Or molested by the parent of a friend. 'Why do parents let their children go into other people's houses?"

In Las Vegas, a man was convicted for visiting the local Wet & Wild (which has since closed) and filming young girls in their bathing suits. Why do people take their children out in public in bathing suits?

If you have ever allowed your child to be seen by any other person, you may have exposed your child to a molester. So one can either lock their child up, or calculate the risks involved, and act accordingly.

People put their child's photos online because they want to, for whatever reasons that they really don't have to justify to anyone else.

I agree.. but I still dont give out information. I walked home from school with my friends since I was 7.

 

[MinnieM3]

I will never tell my kids there is no Santa..... DD was 20 yesterday, DS will be 17 next month, and God bless him, little DS is 6. Santa still leaves me stuff under the tree, so I still believe! We give the kids gifts from us (tagged from Mom and Dad) that are wrapped, but Santa never wraps presents...they are just there! Under the tree! Miraculously over night!

I also teach 3rd grade, when many start to question and I'm definitely not giving Santa up!

 

[Sparx]

Innocence is a gift. Let children keep it. Don't make them grow up fast if they don't have to. If she wants to believe that something good is out there, let her, if she doesn't don't make her, but don't take it away from her. jmo.

BTW, there actually was a "santa clause" a long time ago.