Sorry this is a reply to an old post, but just wanted to add some comments! I read with great interest all the posts about the Raleigh area (live here) and there were some great points! My children are also your childrens' ages, and what was said about the schools is absolutely correct. Many people won't put their children in a regular public school because the children are shuffled around constantly. I think that it is honestly cruel to the children. Our oldest in in a year-round, and we figured we were safe from the shuffle, but unfortunately it is very likely we will be reassigned this year. It is near criminal how they will do this - it all simply depends on the free/reduced lunch percentage for that school. There are great private schools, which we many wind up doing - but this is a trade-off. The smaller private schools which include the Catholic schools, are good - but lack the resources of the public school system...so if your child is developmentally behind, gifted, different from the norm in any way, you are out of luck. The only private schools which have these resources (Ravenscroft, NR Christian, Raleigh School, etc.) run about 10K per year, per child, with no discounts for siblings.
As also said, Durham is considered by some to be a higher-crime, poorer area. Chapel Hill is beautiful, but less-family oriented, and much more artsy-fartsy (just our take on it). I am just letting you know about the attitudes we come across here in Raleigh! Cary is considered by some to be somewhat snobby, very structured (they actually have rules on how many cats and dogs you can have). Many people from up North reside in Cary, which is why the standard of living might be higher. Colleges are great...NCSU, UNC, Meredith (for women). Duke is famous but almost no one FROM NC actually goes there, it is so expensive and impossible to get into. Have heard it often called "The University of New Jersey at Durham".
One more thing that I didn't see I wanted to note about the area. If you are on this list obviously you like Orlando. One of the things we like best about Orlando is the ability we have while there to go out and find something interesting to do. Even with small children, one of our favorite things to do is go out and "hang out" (for lack of better terms) someplace, people-watch, get an ice cream, take a stroll (not necessarily an athletic walk). We love the DTD area, the Boardwalk, even the downtown of Celebration, where you can sit on benches and relax. I remember even the Mercado shopping center in Orl. having a nice area with benches and music. There are so many places to go and "be" without being inside a store or eating a meal in a restaurant (which we don't consider much fun anyway with small kids). Well, if you also enjoy those things...you won't find them here!!! I have lived here all of my adult life, and there really is just not that much to do. Oh, there are plenty of free-standing restaurants, we are getting many of the chains Orlando has. And there is every store under the sun. A couple new malls, too, but we don't really like walking around in a mall. You of course can also get tickets to various plays, concerts, and events. But there really is practically no place to just go and hang out when you want to get out. Before we had children, my husband and I would sometimes just go to the local Barnes and Noble at night to have something to do. It was that or a bar, and we are not really bar-goers. Other cities in NC do have more people-friendly areas...I am thinking of the waterfronts in Wilmington and Beaufort. But not the Triangle. I promise! One slight exception is the new Southpoint Mall, technically in Durham but really in RTP. There is an outdoor area, albeit surrounded by Eddie Bauer and Childrens Place clothing, with benches where you can people watch and get an ice cream. It is small fry compared to other areas which do it better, though. For this reason, we find the Triangle to be a very store-oriented, home-body , not-as-firendly-as-it-should-be place. We have actually considered moving to FL or somewhere else!
Wow, sorry this is so long! Hope this helps in some way!
