Rethinking our room plan

[Princess&CowboyMommy]

I have a different idea, lol...

How about if they/she can't make the Aug 31 deadline, that you invite someone(s) from your family? So her and her DH/son's room would go to someone that would work in that room you were thinking for the estranged party?

Perhaps a "mixed" family situation would keep everyone on their best behavior? And if said SIL/BIL and their son later say that they can go, even 3-4 days later after the deadline, just politely say that the room was offered to someone else already, but you'd be happy to give them the phone number to the AKL resort so they can book their own room

just a thought

 

[MollyMcDaniel]

Keep the GV and enjoy your vacation. It is her problem...put it on her and let her deal with it. No tip-toeing around for a sleeping kid, no egg shell walking because she is unstable. I have in-laws that act just like this. Don't change a thing because of them....EVER. It only perpetuates the problem. If you were on their dime then it would be a different story.

And if she is a neurologist, then she most likely can get her hands on some anti-anxiety meds that would make things a little easier to deal with for a week. And if not, then you get em and put them in her water bottle. Problem solved.

 

[ilovesugar]

And if she is a neurologist, then she most likely can get her hands on some anti-anxiety meds that would make things a little easier to deal with for a week. And if not, then you get em and put them in her water bottle. Problem solved.

I said pretty much the exact same thing!

 

[toniosmom]

Count me in with the posters who said not to cancel the GV and let your SIL deal with her own issues. I know what you mean, though, that her issues brings everyone else down and the last thing you want is a ruined vacation. I think a talk with her is certainly in order. I love the idea from another poster that suggested your husband speak with his brother about his wife. I'm sure your BIL knows how his wife is and an advance warning about the accomodations certainly gives them the option to make their own reservation. And based on their professions, you are right to believe they can afford it!

Good luck!

 

[jojomoore]

Hi, what your going through is the reason that I chose to go to WDW with just my immediately family, except i decided to bring my DDbff (9) also.
My entire life I have taken vacations with my extended family and for the most part it has worked out well. Its so nice for all the kids to play together. It does make extremely wonderful memories for them.

I understand your panic about using so many points and not knowing for sure if everyone is on board with you. You definately need to have a conversation and explain to your family how much this is costing you and make sure they are all planning on coming. Tell them that you need to know ASAP because time is running out. That DVC points are not like regular reservations. Explain to them that this vacation was a dream of yours so that the entire family could have a magical vacation together that everyone will remember but that you do not want to force them to do anything they do not want to do. I would show you SIL the floor plan and make for certain that she is going to be comfortable with the living arrangements.


On our trip, last November, i planned a vacation with just the 3 of us plus 1. It ended up being a great vacation but the first 4 days I was ready to pack up my bags and go home. MY DDBFF had been going through a hard time at home and i thought she would appreciate a family vacation - a magical vacation to get away from it all. However, she acted as if she was a very very spoiled only child (but has two siblings) and I was very thankful that my daughter (who is an only child)handled it with such amazing grace. I did everything I could to plan a vacation to make both kids happy, especially since one is a dare devil and one is extremely cautious, one is all about the rides and one is about soaking up the atmoshere, etc. However, If we were not doing exactly what she(bff) wanted when she wanted it, she pouted, caused a scene, was verbally mean, etc. She was totally selfish for the first several days. I thought to myself is she 2 years old instead of nine yrs old. hmm....I just kept reminding myself that she has had a tough time lately and my daughter loves her and this is her BFF. Luckily as time went on and she was able to check rides off the list she had made in her mind and as she adjusted to the new environment, things got alot better and we had fun.
But to take her on another vacation would definately be a leap of faith.

BTW, we stayed at AKL - Kindani and it was like being in another world. Staying in a GV at AKL would be the best gift you could give your family as long is that is what they want.

 

[mickey&minniealways]

Enjoy the GV. Even if they don't come you and other BIL and his family will enjoy it. Yes a 2 bdrm is nice but the GV can be just that much more special. If this is a special vacation just enjoy it. As a pp suggested dive them a deadline if they don't respond poitiveley then offer it to someone else. Maybe a family friend of both you DH and his other brother. If SIL indicates that she wants to go just not stay with you then give them the reservation # and say I'm sorry but we just don't have the extra points to give you. Who know maybe they will even choose another resort. You can only hope.

 

[ilovesugar]

OMG - I think I am going to scream. I just heard from the one party who was the problem. They are still coming but oh, they are coming on the 13th instead of the 10th! So now I have a GV for 3 days that I don't need, costing me 255 points! What is WRONG with people? Could they not have told me that before???

 

[lundve]

OMG - I think I am going to scream. I just heard from the one party who was the problem. They are still coming but oh, they are coming on the 13th instead of the 10th! So now I have a GV for 3 days that I don't need, costing me 255 points! What is WRONG with people? Could they not have told me that before???

Could you invite another group of family members to stay there the days she isn't there? Maybe someone who wouldn't normally be able to travel for a whole week?

 

[dianeschlicht]

OMG - I think I am going to scream. I just heard from the one party who was the problem. They are still coming but oh, they are coming on the 13th instead of the 10th! So now I have a GV for 3 days that I don't need, costing me 255 points! What is WRONG with people? Could they not have told me that before???

Perhaps it's time to ask them for a little money to make up the difference in cost to you. You need to explain to them WHY this is a financial burden for you. Asking them for money might help them understand that.

 

[mickey&minniealways]

Don't stress. I would be uspet also. However, just tell DH you need to vent. Tell him how you feel. Then he can decide if he ever wants to say anything. Then you don't look like the bad guy. It's hard being the in law sometimes. Believe me I know. It is just in the last 5 or 6 years that my MIL has acted like she appriates anything that I do and I have been married to their son for 26 years. Just don't go out of your SIL anymore. I gave up on one of mine years ago. She barely aknowleges that we exist so I was completly flabergasted when she asked my DD to be in her wedding about 4 years ago. (Never thought she would find someone to put up with her negativity, but he is really nice and they seem happy) At least she is a bit nicer now. Anyway it has taken me a long time to realize that I can't let what they do bother me. Just enjoy what you want. If they want to come let them. If not don't sweat it. Until they get there you can put all the kids in one room and the other adults in the other. You get the master. When the one family gets there just reconfigure sleeping arangements and make sure their room is clean. They will never know the differnce. and the one BIL who is there with you will appreciate a couple nights without kids in his room.

 

[KAT4DISNEY]

I wouldn't let the difference in dates matter b/c I wouldn't be asking the other guests to move accommodations in the middle of a stay anyway. In this case, since you've already been concerned about her joining the trip, it may be a blessing it's fewer days.

I'd say you should be prepared to have even more extra room in the GV though if they cancel the rest of the trip.

 

[BEASLYBOO]

OMG - I think I am going to scream. I just heard from the one party who was the problem. They are still coming but oh, they are coming on the 13th instead of the 10th!

Wow! You know it's strange, when I make vacation plans, I plan ahead, reserve, commit etc. and short of death, the dates stand! It never ceases to amaze me how frivolous people (in your case family) can be using someone elses resources.

It's a huge amount of points, I know, but as someone else said, enjoy the time without this party, spread out and enjoy the GV. Next time let them pay for their own accomodations or better yet as Diane suggested let them cough up some cash so that you can buy yourself the points you've wasted on them!

 

[katybug34]

We have booked a GV at Jambo for a week in December. There will be 6 adults with 5 kids ranging from 1-8. 3 families (our family and Dh's 2 brothers and their families) We were all excited about it but now I am re-thinking this set-up.

The main reason for this is that my SIL does not seem to be able to handle being around that many people for long periods of time. I did not know this at the time we booked the room, but after spending a day with her recently, I found she is going to be a PITA. Long story short, we visited their home and she made it so uncomfortable for us that we ended up leaving after one day. Well, she recently went to visit her OWN family for a week and ended up leaving early because it was to many people in to close of quarters. There were 6 adults and 3 kids in a 1400 sq foot home.

I am thinking this is going to be a miserable trip for everyone if I don't reconfigure things. I am REALLY bummed because I was so looking forward to staying in a GV. So now I am stuck wondering what to do.

What would you do? We are foooting the bill for the lodging so I don't want to spend more than 525 points, which is what it costs for the GV for the week we are there.

A studio is 105 points
A 1 BR is 208 points
A 2BR is 278 points

I think that a 2 bedroom is too small for 4 adults and 4 kids (one being an infant), don't you? We talked about going down to a 2 bedroom and a studio but I don't know if that will work. If we do all studios, then we don't have a kitchen. If we do all 1 bedrooms, it is to many points.

Can anyone help?

I would put them in a 2 bdr lockoff unit. That way they can lock the door to the "studio" section and have privacy from each other. Then, you book a 1br for your family. We always do this for our stays at AK Kidani. It saves points and allows for "away time". After several trips with friends and family, I have found that everyone is a "PITB" once or twice a week and needs to be isolated!

 

[Chuck S]

Actually, I'd keep the GV, and enjoy the first few days without them. I would also put them on my "never again" list. If a group trip is planned, and the dates are agreed upon, if anyone cancels for anything short of an emergency, they are on my never again list, and are never, ever invited back. So far, there are two family members on that list. They have since strongly hinted they'd like to go to Disney, and I just ignore them, or say that would be nice, and then I start telling them the current Disney cash specials, like free dining or 40% off.

 

[ilovesugar]

Perhaps it's time to ask them for a little money to make up the difference in cost to you. You need to explain to them WHY this is a financial burden for you. Asking them for money might help them understand that.

Oh how I wish that I could do that. My DH would have to be the one to do it and he would NEVER do that. He never even talked to his brother about his wives behavior, like he was going to. He just cannot do that. And I am not about to, they are not my family.

Don't stress. I would be uspet also. However, just tell DH you need to vent. Tell him how you feel. Then he can decide if he ever wants to say anything. Then you don't look like the bad guy. It's hard being the in law sometimes. Believe me I know. It is just in the last 5 or 6 years that my MIL has acted like she appriates anything that I do and I have been married to their son for 26 years. Just don't go out of your SIL anymore. I gave up on one of mine years ago. She barely aknowleges that we exist so I was completly flabergasted when she asked my DD to be in her wedding about 4 years ago. (Never thought she would find someone to put up with her negativity, but he is really nice and they seem happy) At least she is a bit nicer now. Anyway it has taken me a long time to realize that I can't let what they do bother me. Just enjoy what you want. If they want to come let them. If not don't sweat it. Until they get there you can put all the kids in one room and the other adults in the other. You get the master. When the one family gets there just reconfigure sleeping arangements and make sure their room is clean. They will never know the differnce. and the one BIL who is there with you will appreciate a couple nights without kids in his room.

I sooo wish that DH would say something, but he won't.

I wouldn't let the difference in dates matter b/c I wouldn't be asking the other guests to move accommodations in the middle of a stay anyway. In this case, since you've already been concerned about her joining the trip, it may be a blessing it's fewer days.

I'd say you should be prepared to have even more extra room in the GV though if they cancel the rest of the trip.

Well, they bought their airlines tickets yesterday so I don't think they will be cancelling. Although, you just never know.

Wow! You know it's strange, when I make vacation plans, I plan ahead, reserve, commit etc. and short of death, the dates stand! It never ceases to amaze me how frivolous people (in your case family) can be using someone elses resources.

It's a huge amount of points, I know, but as someone else said, enjoy the time without this party, spread out and enjoy the GV. Next time let them pay for their own accomodations or better yet as Diane suggested let them cough up some cash so that you can buy yourself the points you've wasted on them!

I know! I just cannot imagine telling people that we would go on vacation for a week, letting them plan and book everything and then inform them 4 months before we leave that we are only going to come for 1/2 the time. I would feel horrible! Especially when I know they have paid for my lodging.

Actually, I'd keep the GV, and enjoy the first few days without them. I would also put them on my "never again" list. If a group trip is planned, and the dates are agreed upon, if anyone cancels for anything short of an emergency, they are on my never again list, and are never, ever invited back. So far, there are two family members on that list. They have since strongly hinted they'd like to go to Disney, and I just ignore them, or say that would be nice, and then I start telling them the current Disney cash specials, like free dining or 40% off.

Ya know, I totally would keep it, but by booking this trip, we are only left with 65 points for next year to use. I just cannot pass up getting over 100 points back which then allows me to go on vacation next year without having to borrow anything.

As for the never again group, they are on that, FOR SURE!

 

[jblrn2b]

What a headache!!!!! I have booked two trips with friends who decided they couldn't go (at the last minute) l willl never again try to plan a vaca with those people. They can book their own rooms. From now on I will book what my family wants to do - if other's join us they have to do so up front.

Just got back from OKW last night and we took DS#2's best friend and he was a complete joy! He was just like one of mine. I was going to pay for his food and room and have the family pay for airplane and park tickets. His family insisted on paying for food as well and gave me a gift certificate for the park to buy something for myself. He can come anytime - LOL.

I am learning who can travel with us and who can't. This being said my family wants to go at Christmas next year. I am booking a 2br for 9 of us 1 under 2. That way if they cancel it won't be so bad and we'll be there at xmas!

 

[momofariel]

Next time you might consider what I do. Take the amount of points and multiply by $5.50. Then I divide that amount by the number of adults staying in the room/rooms. This is the amount I ask each adult to pay for their accommodations. I think $5.50 is a fair amount for family. After all I could rent the points for $11 a point. This way they are committed. I always check to see just how much the reservation would cost if paying cash and share that amount with them. They see what a great deal they are getting and I at least feel like I am recouping something for using my points. On our upcoming trip next spring I am using over 300 points for a 2 bedroom and a studio at BWV. The cost of this reservation if paying cash would be over $8,000.

 

[dianeschlicht]

I used to always be against asking guests for payment, but I'm starting to change my mind on that too. It looks like so many people on the boards have difficulty getting "guests" to be considerate. I guess you have to have some skin in the game to make it worthwhile.

 

[momofariel]

Really you should think about it. Remember how much money you have put into it. This is our hobby....we enjoy going on vacation. We really don't have any other hobbies and so we spend our money on traveling and going to Disney. My relatives go hunting and fishing. That's what they spend their money on. So we invite them to join us sometimes. We offer them great accomidations at a great price. Everybody wins....

 

[momofariel]

Oh, yes one other thing. My sister and her husband are members of RCI. So we trade...for instance, one year she gives us a reservations at a resort in Sedona and the next year I pay her back by giving her a week in Disney. Sometimes we travel together somestimes we don't. It works out really well.