Relationship Advice Needed - WWYD? - UPDATE - Pg. 4

[bevtoy]

Don't call him and don't drive over to his house. He isn't dead, he's breaking up with you...being busy and not returning calls is a common way to do that.

I've said this to my friends 1000 times, they never listen..."If you can't get a hold of your boyfriend, he's not your boyfriend anymore." Guys who like you knock themselves out calling you often and being with you whenever they can. They don't break a date and tell YOU to call THEM. If they have to break a date, they explain why and sound sorry and make new plans.

You can keep calling and demand explanations, etc., but it will get you nowhere and you'll end up embarrassed on top of (possibly) a little heartbroken.

I know you don't want to hear this now, but there are other fish in the sea! You'll find the right guy for you. He's out there. And every experience you have now is what will make you the person he is destined to fall in love with.

For now, try to stay busy and smile.

Well said!

 

[Liberty Belle]

I'm sorry. I think he's avoiding you. It's a pretty chicken-**** thing to do, but sometimes guys do these things.

Honestly, I think you should let it go and move on. Don't add feelings of indignity to your already bruised (I'm assuming here) ego. Move on for yourself, you don't want someone who would do that to you.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

You asked WWYD?

I would.....

Go over and get my DVD back, see he is alive and then move on.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

He's blowing you off. I say move on to someone better!

 

[poohandwendy]

Don't call him and don't drive over to his house. He isn't dead, he's breaking up with you...being busy and not returning calls is a common way to do that.

I've said this to my friends 1000 times, they never listen..."If you can't get a hold of your boyfriend, he's not your boyfriend anymore." Guys who like you knock themselves out calling you often and being with you whenever they can. They don't break a date and tell YOU to call THEM. If they have to break a date, they explain why and sound sorry and make new plans.

You can keep calling and demand explanations, etc., but it will get you nowhere and you'll end up embarrassed on top of (possibly) a little heartbroken.

I know you don't want to hear this now, but there are other fish in the sea! You'll find the right guy for you. He's out there. And every experience you have now is what will make you the person he is destined to fall in love with.

For now, try to stay busy and smile.

I totally agree with this. Especially since you said that he has two roommates. Trust me, they would have let you know if something was seriously wrong.

Sorry this is happening. Some people are just lame and cannot be upfront. That stinks.

 

[KristinBelle]

Go over and get the DVD, if he's home just ask for it back and then say thanks and leave. Just act normal, like nothings wrong, don't give him the satisfaction of thinking he's hurt you. If he's not home, ask the roomates to get the DVD, say thanks and leave. I wouldn't ask him any questions about the returned phone calls etc... Good luck, sorry the guys such a jerk, your better off without him. Of course, do all of this while looking fabulous.

 

[dad2t&e]

I would not drive over there. I'm sure he has family or friends that would check on him if they haven't heard from him in a few days.
Being a guy, here are a couple of scenarios:
Maybe he is out of town, family problems etc…
Maybe he is seeing someone else also at the same time and things are getting complicated and he’s trying to figure out what to do. (Guys do that, not that it is right, but they do it)
Maybe the relationship is moving to fast and he doesn’t know how to tell you.
Maybe he's had a change of heart, so instead of just letting you know he's not really interested, he avoids you.
Maybe he’s just hanging out with the fellows and that is top priority this week.
It doesn't necessarily mean he's a bad guy, it just means he's doing it his way.
Right or wrong, we all think we know how to handle things when sometimes we really don’t.
If it is meant to be, then it will be. Luckily this relationship has been growing only a short time. It's tough when you like the guy and you feel like you've invested several months in the relationship. Remember, Girls think in months, boys think in years. Give it a little time and if it does not work out, it’s better to find out now then later.
If you decide to move on after finding out what the real deal is, it might just open you up to meeting the RIGHT guy next time.

 

[noseybuddy]

It doesn't necessarily mean he's a bad guy, it just means he's doing it his way.
.

Unless he is out of town, in the hospital or dead, then there is no excuse for him not returning her phone call, other than he is a rude, inconsiderate coward. And if he has no intention of dating her anymore he should return the DVD player to her. She shouldn't have to go get it, but there is no way I would let it stay there.

 

[LindsayDunn228]

If he is not out of town, in the hospital or dead, then there is no excuse for him not returning her phone call, other than he is a rude, inconsiderate coward. And if he has no intention of dating her anymore he should return the DVD player to her. She shouldn't have to go get it, but there is no way I would let it stay there.

I agree. A simple, "I don't think we should see each other anymore," even on the phone, is better than this bull.

 

[poohs_hunny]

Thanks for the advice, everyone. You pretty much confirmed what I had suspected, but hoped not to be true - he is just a coward. I have decided that I am going to give him until next weekend to call, just in the tiny possibility that he has a real issue going on. If I don't hear from him by then, I am going to call one final time and tell him that I'm disappointed that he didn't have enough courage to speak to me if he no longer wanted to see me. I will then ask him to either drop my DVD off in my mailbox or mail it. Why should I go over there to get it? He probably wouldn't answer the door anyway, apparently being the coward that he is. If he doesn't return it, oh well. And just to clear things up, it was just a DVD, not a DVD player. If it was a player, I'd be knocking his door down! To the poster who asked if his roommates were cute, one of them is, but they both have girlfriends. You made me smile, though. I will try to keep everyone updated as to the outcome.

 

[wilderness01]

I would never call again. It is a small price to pay, the cost of a DVD, to maintain your pride. Go buy another one and let it go.

Why didn't you have his work number after 3 months of dating?

 

[azgal81]

I agree that's he's blowing you off. I'm sure if something happened by now you would have heard something.

 

[becjlek]

Just remember, it is his loss not yours.

 

[LoraJ]

Does he have email?
I think he is definitely blowing you off. but I would email him and ask for an explanation and your DVD. He may be less of a coward in an email.

 

[Disney Doll]

Unless the DVD is irreplaceable, I'd probably not call him again.

Don't you hate cowardly men?

 

[alliecats]

The ball is COMPLETELY in his court. I would just step back and leave it alone. If he is being a jerk, you'll be sorry later that you called again. Good luck, you deserve better if that is what he is doing.

 

[Tiggeroo]

walk away now. No matter what the reason, except death or coma, you deserve better. There is a reason for the way he's been acting and most likely it's the gf. Forget the dvd, buy another. Consider yourself better off without him. The best revenge is to go out and live well.

 

[Cool-Beans]

Don't call him, don't go over there to get the DVD. Let it go.

A DVD is a lot easier to replace than self-respect.

 

[poohs_hunny]

Why didn't you have his work number after 3 months of dating?

I didn't feel the need to have it, since I have his cell number. He doesn't have my work number either.

 

[poohs_hunny]

Don't call him, don't go over there to get the DVD. Let it go.

A DVD is a lot easier to replace than self-respect.

I want to call not just for the DVD, but mainly to let him know that I didn't apppreciate what he did (or didn't do) and that his behavior was juvenile. I don't want him to think that this was just perfectly fine, and I didn't mind at all. Maybe he'll think again before he does this to another girl. (I can dream, can't I? )