Ready to plunge a fork in my brain and TWIST IT!!!!

[thegrimdwarf]

We will be traveling to Disney with my brother, SIL, and their 2 girls (ages 4 and 18 mos @ travel time). I've been nagging my SIL for a month to get with me on what, if any, ADRs she wanted to make so we could be seated as a group whenever possible. She resisted and resisted, and finally when we were well past the 180 day mark, I told her what we wanted to do and that I was calling that evening - if she wanted in, to get back to me by 5 PM that day. She told me she'd let me know. I didn't hear from her.

I called, and got everything we wanted (which was, basically, 4 character meals and one dinner at Boma). Great times. I emailed the dates and times to her. She writes back the next morning, telling me that it all sounded great and she would call that night. OK - if you'd told me 12 hours ago that it was all great, you wouldn't need to call, but what-EVER!!!

The following morning (yesterday) I call her to see if she had any luck. She forgot to call. Says she'll call that night (last night).

So, I just got an email from her. She was only able to get one seating the same time as us (CP breakfast) - everything else they're like an hour before us. And then....AND THEN....she writes "since our times are less in-demand, you could call and see if you can switch to the same time as us - I'm sure you could get it". Ummmmmm, what? WHAT????

Oh, my head.

 

[Perditamarie]

STEP AWAY FROM THE FORK!!!!

Maybe the meal times would be a good time to just reconnect for your family- if she is making you crazy now, you will need that break if you are touring together all day!! Once I make an ADR I never look back or craziness could follow!!

 

[Matt'sMom]

You probably are not going to want to spend 24/7 of your WDW vacation with the extended family group. Trust me--a little bit of scheduled 'seperate' time for just your family is going to be a blessing.

I'd look at the differing ADR times as a great opportunity to split up for a few hours, so that each family gets to enjoy some private time apart. Meals will be more relaxing if you are not always seated with a larger party of extended family, and multiple young children. Take advantage of the hour or two of time apart at the parks to visit those attractions that your own family enjoys (but the others might not be as excited about).

 

[thegrimdwarf]

It's not our intention to spend all day together - mostly we were looking at doing whatever park together as a group in the morning, having lunch together, splitting up for the afternoons and possibly regrouping for dinner if we happen to be in the same park.

So basically what she's done is eliminate about 90 minutes of "togetherness" from our morning touring. *I* don't really care, but I know DS4 and my niece will be sad that they've got less time together. Too bad, though - I know my SIL well enough to see that if I change my ADRs now, it will just be the tip of the iceberg. "If you call, you can get the same flights as us.....if you call, you could change to our hotel....." Blah, blah, blah!

 

[eeyorefan08]

I know exactly how you feel. I've been trying to plan a high school graduation trip for myself for this June. This trip was supposed to be me, my mom, and my dad. We invite my grandmother. My grandmother feels bad for my dad's other brother and his family because they have never been. She inists on paying for their whole trip.

My parents are DVC members so they said they would cover the lodging. We have to change our original dates to fit their schedule. My aunt is a florist and does flowers for weddings. After we change our plans, I make dining reservations.

A week and a half or so later they tell us the dates aren't good and they want to come down earlier and leave earlier. At this point it is like seven weeks out. We have to change everything again. I have to change all of our dining again. We lost some of the original meals like the castle, but they are lucky to get what they got.

We are doing this trip for my grandmother because she has not been in the best of health lately. I just want to scream. Thankfully their trip is only 6 days. My mom, dad, and I are staying for a week after they leave.

 

[DevilDuckie]

Umm... no. Just no. No changing to accomodate people who are being big dumb losers. Unfortunate for the kids, but I'm sure other "togetherness" time can be arranged to make up for it.

In laws are such a treat.

 

[SharpMomOfTwo]

OK, not to be a pain, but why didn't you make the reservations for EVERYONE when you made them, and if they said no to them, just call back and cancel their seats keeping your own ADRs? Just a thought!

 

[thegrimdwarf]

OK, not to be a pain, but why didn't you make the reservations for EVERYONE when you made them, and if they said no to them, just call back and cancel their seats keeping your own ADRs? Just a thought!

Because she didn't get back in touch with me. Why would I assume they wanted to do what we wanted to do, when I hear nothing but crickets chirping every time I ask her about it? This is classic SIL behavior - she puts it off til it's too late, then expects others to accomodate her. I'm not her mommy.

 

[trivial]

If you're not keen on changing your ADR times (and I wouldn't blame you), I would recommend to her that she try calling back every so often to see if there have been any openings for your ADR times.

 

[thegrimdwarf]

If you're not keen on changing your ADR times (and I wouldn't blame you), I would recommend to her that she try calling back every so often to see if there have been any openings for your ADR times.

That was pretty much what I told her when I wrote back - we're keeping our times, and if she's inclined to call the dine line every now and again to check for cancellations, she can have at it.

 

[luvmy2sams]

Why don't you use the fork on your SIL instead?

Glad to read that you're not changing your times to hers. You'll probably be thankful for that in the end.

Have a great trip!

 

[DevilDuckie]

Because she didn't get back in touch with me. Why would I assume they wanted to do what we wanted to do, when I hear nothing but crickets chirping every time I ask her about it? This is classic SIL behavior - she puts it off til it's too late, then expects others to accomodate her. I'm not her mommy.

If you were feeling extra generous and wanted to go way above and beyond the call of duty I suppose you could call and ask if your party could be expanded on any of your ADRs. I still would not change any of your own plans, but if the restaurant can accomodate you with a bigger party (which they might, even if they don't have room for a separate party) then there's a certain amount of win-win.

Again, this would be a great favor on your part, in no way required and probably not fully appreciated by your SIL. You'd have to do it out of the goodness of your heart- and mine's not always that good!

 

[K and K's Mommy]

If you were feeling extra generous and wanted to go way above and beyond the call of duty I suppose you could call and ask if your party could be expanded on any of your ADRs. I still would not change any of your own plans, but if the restaurant can accomodate you with a bigger party (which they might, even if they don't have room for a separate party) then there's a certain amount of win-win.

Again, this would be a great favor on your part, in no way required and probably not fully appreciated by your SIL. You'd have to do it out of the goodness of your heart- and mine's not always that good!

I was going to say this also. For two years in a row, my parents have joined us very last minute. Some of the restaurants have been able to add 2 people to my ADR, others can't. I do think 4 would be harder though. I definitely would not change yours though!!

 

[TDISFAMILY]

That was pretty much what I told her when I wrote back - we're keeping our times, and if she's inclined to call the dine line every now and again to check for cancellations, she can have at it.

Good for you that is what I would have suggested. You gave her plenty of time to get back with you and she chose not to.

 

[brenalexacamp]

well i leave in 12 hours
and stupid me waited cuz i couldn't get an answer and now i cannot get chef mickey
i got tony's for my son's bday and i know i will be cancelling the other people in the party

which is fine but they insist on never needing adr
i know better i was there in august for free dining

 

[nonzerosum]

Do we have the same SIL???? I've totally given up on mine and would NEVER travel with their family for fear we wouldn't ever get out of the driveway. I don't know if this holds true for your SIL, but with mine, the more I try, the more I call, the more I offer to help, the more she puts me off. Very annoying.. I feel your pain. You snooze you lose (directed at your SIL) and I'm glad you got what you wanted for your family.

 

[polineedyan]

How about this? How about starting with ONE call to Dis, to see if you can change 1 ADR? If its no problem, maybe do another, and see. Sometimes, we have to give "these people" a little extra help..For the good of the whole and all..

 

[DVCLiz]

OK, not to be a pain, but why didn't you make the reservations for EVERYONE when you made them, and if they said no to them, just call back and cancel their seats keeping your own ADRs? Just a thought!

It doesn't work this way. If you make an ADR for 6 or 8, then call back and tell them you only need a table for 4, they cancel the first reservation, then look to see what is available for your size party. They won't just drop 4 from your origianl ADR and leave 4 on it. That's why people get so worked up - someone else changing their plans means yours change as well, unless you simply keep the original ADR and tell them at the restaurant that your party size has changed. Then I think they will do their best to seat you, but it's not the normal way of doing it.

 

[thegrimdwarf]

How about this? How about starting with ONE call to Dis, to see if you can change 1 ADR? If its no problem, maybe do another, and see. Sometimes, we have to give "these people" a little extra help..For the good of the whole and all..

Why do we have to give adults a little extra help? I mean, seriously? She is a grown woman, with 2 kids. Why, exactly, does she need to be my responsibility? Or anyone's responsibility, for that matter. She knew what my plan was, and still couldn't get her crap together - that was extra help that she chose not to take.

 

[AJKMOM]

Why do we have to give adults a little extra help? I mean, seriously? She is a grown woman, with 2 kids. Why, exactly, does she need to be my responsibility? Or anyone's responsibility, for that matter. She knew what my plan was, and still couldn't get her crap together - that was extra help that she chose not to take.

Exactly, we aren't talking about a kid here. If you do what your SIL wants, you are enabling her to behave this way forever. Someone will always have to cave to her, and that just stinks. It's not like you didn't give her plenty of warning.

Next time, don't even tell them you are going until it's too late for them to go, too. If you feel bad for the kids, offer to take their 4 year old along with you.