You see, she was in a nursing home for about four years before she died. Her husband died a year or two later. I think that made her lose her mentality. Not that she went insane, no. Just that, it never really clicked that the man she was married with for over 60 years died.
Since then, she was hospitalized a few times, due to medical problems. When she wasn't hospitalized, she'd spend her time in the nursing home. Occasionally, my grandma would visit her. Some days, my grandma told me, she was fine, she'd remember some things, and she'd be in a good mood.
Most of the time, (or whenever I visited her), she was "out of it." It would be one of her off days.
One day, I had the opportunity to visit her. I didn't feel like going, because I didn't feel like leaving the house. My mom told me that that was a really good day for my greatgrandma. I felt guilty, and devastated.
I never had the opportunity to visit her, until she fell very ill. This was the end, and my entire extended family knew that. The Saturday before she died, *She died on a Tuesday.* I went to visit her, one last time. She was on life support, and was having a hard time breathing. It was just . . .horrible. The guilt came back.
But yeah. My mom, grandma, and I sat by her for a few hours. Before we left, I read from a book about my great grandma's patron saint. And, as we were saying goodbye, I asked to say my goodbye privately.
That Tuesday, she died. I'll never forget it. I had just gotten home from a piano lesson, and I was insanely happy. I have no idea why. Everything was just wonderful. My mom was just sitting there, crying. It was horrible.
Yeah. That was a semi-vent. But really, the song makes me think of all of that.
