Question re: discipline/ parenting at WDW

[msmama]

I continue the same rules, but applied with mercy.

WDW is overwhelming, just processing the experience can be difficult. Outside of the normal routine kids have a hard time using their internal boundaries.

I just wanted to say that I love that. Same rules but with mercy.

Unless things were REALLY bad, I'd never threaten to leave the park, but if things were that bad, I'd know there is an underlying issue.

While there are "bad" kids out there, there are many more kids that are just overwhelmed and don't know enough how to regulate or verbalize what they are feeling.

 

[NotTheBatesMotel]

With all due respect (and I mean that, I'm not being snarky), no one knows exactly what kind of parent they will be until they are there, and even then it is constantly evolving.

Ask any parent, say one thing you swear you will never do or tolerate , and those words will come back to haunt you (probably at Disney World).

This...this, so much. You truly don't know what kind of parent you will be until you are one. Your parenting approach can change too as your kid(s) grow up.

 

[nd2fl]

As a parent of a 4 year old just leaving Disney and pretty much everything has already been said: ice cream. Ice cream solves everything.

 

[Susiequsie60]

I think that actions deserve consequences, either positive or negative, and my now adult children knew that, as does my granddaughter. I never threatened my kids with a consequence that I could not live with, the punishment is also mine, you see. So to answer your question, when on vacation, they knew that if I said that enough was enough, they knew exactly what that meant....any more and the day was done. But that disciple was for them, their lifetime. I don't think parents can suddenly teach their kids to be patient, well mannered and self controlled in a week, so they will not magically turn into those model children that live on Leave It To beaver if they were not taught that from the start.

It is impossible to know what a family's background is from a ten minute encounter, but I will say that parents who simply must have that meal at 'Ohana, even if the ADR they scored is at 9:45 and their kids are used to dinner at 5 are setting themselves and everyone else up for disaster. The parents who just must experience fireworks at CG, and that does not take place until 10PM, but their dinner is at 7:30, so they drag it out....not going to end well. And please, if as a parent you never said "no" don't start now. Little Johnney is not going to understand that you have already spent his college money on your bucket list trip, and every attraction ends up in a gift shop that entices him. Buckle up...it is expensive.

My kids were not angels, and we did have that trip when the were tweens that put me over my edge, but I never set them up to fail, and I think that happens a lot. Not intentionally, but WDW is over stimulation, overwhelming, and exhausting.Under the best circumstances, meltdowns are going to happen, parent will either miss a signal or the child goes from 0 to 60 in 2.2 seconds with no warning...not for them or their parents. But those others.....Yikes!

I agree with everything you said. I now work in a school and I see the situation of parents setting up their kids to fail every single day. I was probably guilty of lots of parenting faux pas while I was raising my now grown kids. That particular situation, however, wasn't one of them. So many things out there making the raising of children very difficult. I definitely tried to be conscious not to add other very avoidable problems.

 

[Lupeix]

I think you will avoid most issues like the one you described by going with a 5 -9 year old. They call it terrible twos and trying threes for a reason.
I went last year when DS was 2 1/2 and we mostly avoided tantrums by preventing things that triggered them, and DS is strong willed and throws monumental tantrums despite the fact we really enforce consequences. He just tests the limits at every chance he is given. he ends up in a time out at least 3 times a day, but it is slowly getting better. He now knows what is right or wrong but has difficulty controlling his temper, which he is learning how to do.
Buses at WDW are in my opinion one of the things to avoid with toddlers, waiting specially if combined with hunger or sleepiness, is a recipe for a meltdown.

What is good to remember about discipline is that not giving in on a tantrum is really important, and it sounds that it was exactly what the mom was doing. The easier way to end a tantrum is to give the kid what he wants, which is the opposite of discipline. It takes patience and consistence to have well behaved kids.
In a case like that, such as a bus or a plane, you sometimes have to choose between sticking to it or giving everyone else some peace. when it happens, you are mortified and torn between those two options, and usually for the sake of others you give up. I rather try to avoid being in that situation as much as I can.
Older kids understand better so they usually don't scream for 20 minutes in a row unless they are total brats.
But next time you see a 3 yo screaming for 20 minutes, remember that it may just be because he is not getting what he wants, and that parent may just be trying to do the right thing

 

[jenthern]

I'm not going to touch on the discipline thing. Everyone else has it covered.

We're taking my almost 3 year old for the third time in January. We go once a year. Will he remember it? He might remember some of this trip, but it's not about memories for him at this age. It's about the experience, both for him and for us. Each time has been magical for him, and I'm sure this trip will be no different. The nice part about going every year is we don't feel the need to do everything on every trip. We go back to our hotel for nap time or stay through nap and go back for an early bed time.

Strollers? A place to put your stuff. Diapers? I have to change them anyway.

Bonus? Since he's under 3, he's free.

 

[puffkin]

I'm not going to touch on the discipline thing. Everyone else has it covered.

We're taking my almost 3 year old for the third time in January. We go once a year. Will he remember it? He might remember some of this trip, but it's not about memories for him at this age. It's about the experience, both for him and for us. Each time has been magical for him, and I'm sure this trip will be no different. The nice part about going every year is we don't feel the need to do everything on every trip. We go back to our hotel for nap time or stay through nap and go back for an early bed time.

Strollers? A place to put your stuff. Diapers? I have to change them anyway.

Bonus? Since he's under 3, he's free.

Yup. We are the opposite of OP in that we are trying to squeeze in as many trips as possible before our youngest turns 3 and we have to pay for him! Its just so magical and immersive for him, the diapers you have to do anyways wether at home or Disney and the stroller is great to store stuff especially in the winter when you are dressing in layers all day. Sure there are some negatives to taking a little one, but the positives far outweigh them! Now if this was a once in a life time trip I would recommend older, but if you plan to visit fairly frequently, it still is an awesome age to take them and you miss so much waiting until they are older.

 

[AJ1983]

Yup. We are the opposite of OP in that we are trying to squeeze in as many trips as possible before our youngest turns 3 and we have to pay for him! Its just so magical and immersive for him, the diapers you have to do anyways wether at home or Disney and the stroller is great to store stuff especially in the winter when you are dressing in layers all day. Sure there are some negatives to taking a little one, but the positives far outweigh them! Now if this was a once in a life time trip I would recommend older, but if you plan to visit fairly frequently, it still is an awesome age to take them and you miss so much waiting until they are older.

Believe me, I WISH I lived in Orlando (or within reasonable driving distance) so that I could take a 2 year old to Disney for a day to see how they do with it. My favourite YouTube clip is a little barely 2 year old running up to Mickey and her parents trying to tell her she has to wait her turn. Unfortunately, we live an 8 hour flight away from Disney and they charge full price airfare once they turn 2. And to travel at reasonable prices, the flight schedules are a terrible for traveling with kids, so as people said, I feel like I would be setting them up for failure. Also, its difficult for me to get the time off so I would rather wait until they are old enough to tolerate things better so we can all enjoy our vacation (although I'm sure it won't be all sunshine and roses at ANY age haha)