Question for women about finding out about pregnancy/telling DH/SO

[Minnie824]

I know a lot of people, not just on the boards, but people I work with, or on tv, etc, try to figure out how to tell their DH/SO the happy news. What I don't understand is why they don't find out with you? I don't mean to start a debate or say doing something is wrong. When DH and I found out we were pregnant, we bought a test and, well, I 'took' it alone, but we looked at the results together. When we have another one, we'll find out together also. It was a special moment we'll never forget. My question is, why do people find out on their own and not together? I'm honestly just curious, because I wouldn't have thought of doing that.

 

[becka]

Well I can tell you that in my case I was testing at 4 AM and DH was still asleep. I really, really, really expected the test to be negative and it was the shock of my life to find it was positive.

I have very irregular cycles so I can't rely on that as a predictor and we were not even trying to have a baby. I really thought I had a very bad case of PMS but I thought I had probably get a test "just in case". The whole time I was taking the thing I kept complaining to myself that this testing was a waste of money.

The reason it was 4 AM is because I woke up and had to go right THEN and I know they say first thing in the morning is best. I didn't see any reason to wake up DH until AFTER the test turned positive and then he got an early wake up call with me screaming at him and waving that stick around in his face!

 

[Kermit]

I did it for a variety of reasons. The biggest one was probably because I hated those tests that were negative. DH was disappointed too, but being a man, he didn't really feel it the way I did, and I always wanted to be alone for a few minutes when I found out I wasn't pregnant. Also, I usually took them first thing in the morning, and he wakes up after I do. I took so many that he would have stopped getting up with me way before I ever got my first positive one.

 

[swanmom]

We were undergoing fertility treatments. I had a routine appointment to draw blood to determine hormone levels for the 'right time' when they came in and told me they thought there was something else going on! So I found out in blood lab of the doctor's office without DH. I rushed out and bought a couple of baby sleepers on my lunch hour. That night, when DH asked "How'd your appointment go? What's the doctor say we have to do now?" I replied "We have to go out and buy more of these.........holding up the baby jammies!"

 

[Pete's Mom]

Her husband came home and saw his 4 year old running around the house with a shirt on that said "BIG BROTHER!"

 

[Saphire]

Here is my story. The first two pregnancies were like yours, Minnie,...my husband was very aware and we found out together. However, the third preganacy was a complete surprise. I took the test alone without my husband knowing, which is so unlike me because I usually tell him everything. I was shocked to see it was positive. Well, it was a few weeks before Christmas and I suddenly had a wonderful idea. It took all my strength not tell him. On Christmas morning, at the bottom of his stocking, was a white knit bootie. He caught on and was so amazed, not just at the news, but that I kept the secret. There is something kind of unique and special about announcing a pregnacy, and surprisng the one you love is fun!

 

[CamColt]

DS#1, I took a test while DH was working. He worked at 2 jobs that day so he was gone from 6:00 am until 12:00am. Plus, I sort of liked the idea of surprising him....sort of like giving him a gift.

DS#2, we had struggled with infertility for about a year. I had gotten my haircut the previous night and my hairdresser told me I was pregnant because of my hair(she had no idea I was trying). Since it was really too soon to tell, I waited until the morning when the test would be most responsive. Again, DH was at work when I got up and took the test. He called bright and early for the results though.

 

[s&k'smom]

What a fun thread. With DS we had struggled for two years to get pregnant. Two weeks after coming home from WDW we got prgnant. I too woke at 4am because I was so scared it would be negative. I woke him and he said cool!

Now with DD it took 4 years. We had pretty much given up. We didn't even use birth control because well let's just say not all the pieces work correctly. Well one night they did. It was kinda weird because we had lunch with a friend one day who had lost a child at 36 weeks and I was standing there talking to her and it dawned on me that I was pregnant. I scrapped together what pennies I could and bought the cheapest test I could find. I woke DH up the next day and I told him "remember when I asked for jewelery for our 10th anniversary? Surprise!!

 

[Keli]

My dh is the one that told me I was pregnant, lol. He works in a lab and he drew a blood sample on me before he left for work (brought the needle and syringe home the day before so he had the stuff he needed to do it at the house) and ran the test after he got to work. Therefore he knew before I did that we were going to be parents. I have always liked it that he knew before I did (and had plenty of time to get excited before he came to tell me).

 

[suzannen]

We had been trying for two years and were supposed to be starting fertility treatment that very week, so we thought there was no way I was pregnant. My DH went with me to buy the test and we sat and held hands while we waited, trying not to get our hopes high. When it came up positive to our surprised delight, we both started crying. Minnie, like you, it was a special moment and I'm glad he was with me to share it.

 

[skuttle]

my pregnancy was a complete surprise...that's why we didn't find out together. I really thought I was feeling yucky and tired because I had just finished finals. We weren't planning on having kids for a couple more years. But now that we're having our first in July, we're thrilled!!

 

[browneyes]

When I got pregnant the first time, I was still living at home with my parents. I was on b/c and still got pregnant. My SO never wants to know if I'm late, he'd rather I do all the worrying. He never wants to know when I'm "feminine" either.

He was actually upset with me when I told him I was pregnant. Not because I was pregnant, but because I told him after I took a few home tests. He would've preferred I told him after I went to the doctor. He refused to tell his family I was pregnant until the dr confirmed it. I was already showing by then. I was almost 3 months pregnant and I was very obviously pregnant by then. Our dd has always been a show off.

When I got pregnant with our ds, I waited until it was confirmed by someone other than me. I know my body, but he'd rather have a second opinion on things like that. Our dd knew before he did. But, he preferred it that way.

 

[nativetxn]

Such sweet stories. Back in the olden days, when I got pregnant with Travis, there were no home pregnancy tests. You had to be 40 days pregnant before the doctor would order a blood test because otherwise the results wouldn't be accurate.

Because of certain symptoms I had my husband knew that I was either pregnant or had some terrible terminal disease. So he knew the day I had the blood drawn and called me at work in the afternoon to find out the results. He was thrilled and relieved at the same time. I've always regretted not surprising him with my pregnancy but that's how things went for us.

Katholyn

 

[pumba]

but when my daughter in law and son told me it was .....sooooooo funny.....
I got an email on Monday and it was a picture of the Easter bunny splat on the street and the easter eggs all over the place....and the heading when I got the email was news.....and I thought to myself my son is working to many hours.....but I kept the easter bunny joke and said to myself....will use it around easter time.....wednesday my son calls and he says .....hey did you get my email and I said .....yah I think so.....what was it.....so my husband is sitting at my computer and I tell him to turn it on and we look at it again and I said.....it is a dead easter bunny ....and my son says....a what???????? and I say it again.....then I say ...it is a dead rabbit....well all the light bulbs went off and I got it......they were going to have a baby.....our little grandson is due June 3

 

[mtemm]

For us we were totally surprised. Daniel is the love of my life but we weren't planning on trying for a while...needed to get some things in order first.

I have pretty predictable cycles and was surprised when I was late by a few days. Talked to an on-line friend who said, why not just take a test. Well, I was soooo nervous and in the back of my mind didn't think I was. Took it the next morning...I was shaking and a total mess. Didn't tell him in a cute way...needed him to know THEN so just sent him into the bathroom. He thought it was to kill a bug! LOL!

I can see taking the test together, but don't think its odd to take it then tell. Too each her own!

M.

 

[Serena]

The first one I took the test and he went to see the results before the time was up. It was positive and he came and told me.
The second one I checked the results first and then told him. Then we went and told our 6 yo, that it was "in the pink". She was so happy about it.

 

[Princess_Aurora]

With my first, I was 16 and pretty much all alone. When I told DD's biological father that I was pregnant, he hung up on me I doubt he wanted to be there to see me take the test.

With my second, I had been on Depo Provera and my monthly cycle hadn't completely gone back to being normal yet so I would have to take a test every month. When I finally started my period I started taking bc pills. After the first pack was all gone, I hadn't started my period yet. I was thinking maybe the Depo shot was still messin with my cycle. A couple of weeks later when my period still hadn't started, I thought I'd better go pick up a test. I totally swear I didn't think it would turn out to be positive, and I wasn't even sure if it was after the first test (one dark pink line and another barely there pink line) Three tests later, I could np longer deny it...I was pregnant.

 

[mickeyfan1]

Like Nativetxn, I was PG in the old days. And back then, "we" weren't pregnant, either. I still find that a little odd, but that's ok. Anyway, I knew I was pregnant 2 weeks after it happened. I told DH when he got home from work that night, he said, "Are you sure?" and I said, "Yes, it happened two weeks ago, when I was to lazy to use my diaphram." And I also knew it was a boy. And almost 26 years later, I can still say I was right!

 

[Mskanga]

Oh, I love this thread and all the stories!!
DH found out before me and not because he saw the results before me, he found out because of the mood swings I was going through. What actually threw me off the loop was that I did "spot" for a couple of days enough to make me think it was my period , finally dh couldn't take my mood swings anymore and went out himself and bought me the home pregnancy test , boy was I in shock when I saw a possitive sign!
With DD2 , I bought the kit and I took the test with both of us home in the evening, it came out possitive immediately.
After DD2, I got fixed and not more kids for us.

 

[Pin Wizard]

I did 2 tests on the same day with 2 different brands. Hurricane Andrew was brewing in the Atlantic. In case anything horrible happened to us, I wanted to first know if I was pregnant. I was so excited I couldn't keep it to myself. I called him at work at told him. How unromantic, but I couldn't wait!