Question for Stay at Home Moms

[Cinerbelle]

Thank you sooo much to everyone with the kind replies!! I am getting some GREAT ideas... I will rock this house shortly!!

I honestly do not think I am lazy... getting up a 4am to work a full time job for the past 9 years and working "normal" hours the other 14 years plus keeping a household with two busy kids in every sport and a hubby with a crazy schedule... to me proves I'm not lazy... I just need to learn the ropes of my new position... SAHM.

THANK YOU!!

 

[Belle0101]

I assigned rooms to specific days too. Kitchen and laundry were always Monday.

I homeshool now so I spend a lot of time with that. I need to either assign days again or incorporate housework into the homeschooling. Maybe call it home-ec?

 

[bumbershoot]

I'm still working on motivation, and I've been "at home" since I was merely planning our wedding, starting back in late '02/early '03. One DS joined me, it's gotten harder, because when he was bitty he just did NOT appreciate it when I was doing something other than playing with him (and I was too exhausted to just put him on my back in the podegi (traditional Korean babycarrier) and work), then when he got a bit more independent he reveled in doing things like....pulling all the VHS tapes out of the bookshelf 5 times a day (until I just left them there, which was a mess, but caused less work (cleaning up once after he was asleep) than if I picked them up each time!), etc. Now we're homeschooling.

When DH and I were both working, sure things were neater, but, and of course it sounds obvious, but there was NO ONE THERE DURING THE DAY. It was exactly the same when we got home as it was when we left. It's amazing how much easier that makes it! Bathrooms stay so much nicer for so much longer when *no one is using them* through the day. Same with kitchens!

I imagine if we were both working and someone was coming over to use our house during the day and not cleaning up, we'd be a bit peeved when we got home! And that's what it's like when you have parent+child at home during the day.


We have the basic chores down...DH feels quite strongly that my main job is to "keep Eamon alive". So everything else is much lower on the list, and he actually never expects more from me. We share most household things. I mean, if we were both working, we'd hire someone to watch DS, and wouldln't expect him/her to clean the house as well! We'd still both get home and have to do the chores. So our routines for that stayed about the same from when we were both working, to when only he was working, and to when DS joined us.

But it's the organization and other things that really get me. We continue to have just too much stuff for the place, and I'm growing sicker and sicker of having stuff with no "home". So it's a constant problem, with just trying to figure out where on earth things should go. We've been here for 2 years now...we really should have figured this all out. DH is cool with just boxing things up and not looking at them until we leave, but that's what we've been doing for years, and it's never NOT been a problem!


Good luck!

 

[Belle0101]

Thank you sooo much to everyone with the kind replies!! I am getting some GREAT ideas... I will rock this house shortly!!

I honestly do not think I am lazy... getting up a 4am to work a full time job for the past 9 years and working "normal" hours the other 14 years plus keeping a household with two busy kids in every sport and a hubby with a crazy schedule... to me proves I'm not lazy... I just need to learn the ropes of my new position... SAHM.

THANK YOU!!

Exactly! There's bound to be an adjustment period for everyone but you'll find what works for you and your family. Enjoy your new venture!

 

[DisneyKT]

I'm not worried if it is helpful or not, I'm just responding. Her kids are in school and she has no desire to get up and clean. If I was honest, I would tell her to just quit being lazy, jmo.

Meow!!!!

 

[disneydreamersx4]

Why can't some people keep their mean thoughts to themselves?

OP It is hard for some of us when the kids go back to school I feel lost. Then after a few weeks I love the silence LOL I'm going to take some of ya'll advice to assign days to certain rooms and make a list of what needs to be done in each room. I can really see how that can motivate to see things getting checked off. I always go for farmer's market shopping on Mondays. Friday's I dust.

 

[kirstenb1]

I make a giant, longterm list. For instance, my first priority when the kids start school, is to scrub, and refinish the deck.

Then, their clubhouse/swingset.

Then the exterior siding of the house. Repaint as needed.

Then, clean every baseboard and repaint walls where their little fingers touch every day.

Then catch up on scrapbooking.

Then volunteer more, at church and school. Help out with food pantry.

Work on middle school dance committee, copy papers for elem school teacher, etc.

Go to gym more to work off the extra 20 lbs that have declared my butt their new home!!

Anyway, this is just my high points list. My point is, create a longterm list. That way, you can just tackle it when you feel like it. You've prioritized, and have broken it down into steps, so it doesn't seem so daunting.

 

[themilesfamily]

Stay-at-home mom/homeschooler here!

I set a goal that I will improve one thing around the house each day -- no matter how big or small.

Clean out the junk drawer, clean and organize the craft room, wash all the windows, clean the laminate floors, scrub the bathroom -- whatever -- I just pick one project each day and the results really add up.

The little stuff around the house -- dishes, cleaning the countertops, sweeping, etc. -- I just do that as I go along with my day. I don't count those things as my "project."

I'm not a naturally clean person, but I find this way to be unstructured and doable enough that I can keep going.

My biggest time-sucks -- computer and TV. Those are dangerous!!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

1) Invite someone over. Tried and true method for quickly cleaning.

2) Use a timer. Go out an buy an inexpensive timer that is portable. I set it and then work on whatever I have been avoiding. Sometimes you have to force yourself to work on "X".

3) My sister uses a schedule and she swears by it. She has days she cleans x,y,z, and it is effective. While I may not be as OCD about a rigid schedule, I do have a loose one that I follow everyday. In other words you need a system.

 

[wdwiala]

1) Invite someone over. Tried and true method for quickly cleaning.
.

 

[tinker&belle]

Get dressed. If I stay in my PJs I am in lounge-mode.

 

[dzorn]

When you find out could you PM me and let me know.

Denise in MI

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Get dressed. If I stay in my PJs I am in lounge-mode.

For me I have to take a shower and get ready for the day. If I do that, I get a heck of a lot done in the morning.

Treat it like a job some days also works. You know those days when you have a zillion unfinished projects and don't know which one to work on?

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I have no idea what could help you. I work for a living and still find the time to come home and do what needs to be done. I don't know what to tell you.

That's awesome!

OP- Take a few days to yourself. There will always be a house to clean. Then when I know I have to get with it I make a list. When you cross stuff off you actually feel like you accomplished something and it's like a challenge to see how much you can get done in a day! I also sometimes give myself a set amount of time to clean and that is it. So say I get up at 8 (yeah righ! more like 6!) I will give myself until 10 to clean. After that I am done for the day. I also have kids home though so I do stuff with them all day. Even if I didn't though I would not want to spend the whole day cleaning. There is simply more to life than scrubbing bubbles. Congrats on your new postition in life!

 

[clarabelle]

Do you have an Ipod? You can download pod casts to listen to while you are cleaning
They are free and keep me entertained when I want a change from music

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I assigned rooms to specific days too. Kitchen and laundry were always Monday.

I homeshool now so I spend a lot of time with that. I need to either assign days again or incorporate housework into the homeschooling. Maybe call it home-ec?

Not to go off topic but I really think that is a great idea. So many young adults have no idea how to run a house or cook these days. I am all for teaching kids basic skills like how to clean a tub or cook or do laundry.

 

[LBAK]

Enjoy your free time. For years you've been working hard in a routine. Kick back and relax for a while. I teach and every summer I think I will have the house deep cleaned the first week I'm off. WRONG! I poke around for a few weeks then I get in my cleaning mode. By the time I have the routine down it's time to go back to school! Don't be so hard on yourself, you'll get there.

 

[golfgal]

[/B]
Not to go off topic but I really think that is a great idea. So many young adults have no idea how to run a house or cook these days. I am all for teaching kids basic skills like how to clean a tub or cook or do laundry.

In 6th grade our kids had a laundry unit in their Family and Consumer Sciences class (the new PC name for Home Ec ) and DS15 decided at the time that doing laundry wasn't such a bad deal and I ended up with a personal laundry person for about a year and a half.

 

[polkadotsuitcase]

1) Invite someone over. Tried and true method for quickly cleaning.

Hilarious but very, very true. If I even know a repair guy is coming, I make sure the place looks decent! I've always wanted to ask them if everyone's house always looks good when they come, lol.

2) Use a timer. Go out an buy an inexpensive timer that is portable. I set it and then work on whatever I have been avoiding. Sometimes you have to force yourself to work on "X".

Also a good tip! I homeschool and run my own biz from home, and I use this to tackle deadlines that I'm dragging on.

I also use a reward system for myself, weird as that sounds. If I accomplish something I really don't feel like doing, I'll give myself a "reward" -- an hour to sit and read, time to fool around online (hello, DISboards!), or whatever.

Good luck! You'll find a routine that works for you. Sometimes you just need to accept that the transition times may be a little bumpy, but that you'll get through them.

 

[Mimi1965]

I honestly dont understand the SAHM concept-when your kids are in school

I was a SAHM-but worked out of an office in my home. When the kids went to school-I went to the office a couple days a week. But I always worked.

I cant imagine being home-without kids-and doing nothing but housework all day. Isnt it boring?