Pressure to join Facebook??

[clutter]

What I would really like -is to see everyone else's pages -but not have one of my own.
I know -not very reasonable of me is it?
Thanks for your input

Actually, it's pretty easy. Just don't post anything.

 

[Scurvy]

For one thing, I have a couple of friends that post CONSTANTLY. If they're not posting they're playing a game or receiving hearts or trees or some other crap, which is posting on my wall. While I want to keep up with their posts, I don't really care about what site they've become a fan of. Or what level they've achieved in Bejeweled, because when you play games it goes out to all your friends!

You can ignore specific applications, if you choose to. That way things like "Bejeweled" and the "Give a heart" application won't show up on your feed no matter how often your friends post them.

I have noticed that many of the common complaints that people make about Facebook (like being annoyed by all the applications, or concerns about strangers looking at your wall, or worries about people knowing too much about you) are things that you can actually control by changing your settings. I enjoy Facebook, but I definitely think it's much better once you learn enough about it to be able to customize it to fit the way you want to use it.

 

[clarabelle]

Thanks everyone!
This helps

 

[SaraJayne]

You can ignore specific applications, if you choose to. That way things like "Bejeweled" and the "Give a heart" application won't show up on your feed no matter how often your friends post them.

I have noticed that many of the common complaints that people make about Facebook (like being annoyed by all the applications, or concerns about strangers looking at your wall, or worries about people knowing too much about you) are things that you can actually control by changing your settings. I enjoy Facebook, but I definitely think it's much better once you learn enough about it to be able to customize it to fit the way you want to use it.

I agree. And I think many complaints/misconceptions come about because people don't know how to use the settings correctly.

 

[RadioNate]

You can ignore specific applications, if you choose to. That way things like "Bejeweled" and the "Give a heart" application won't show up on your feed no matter how often your friends post them.

I have noticed that many of the common complaints that people make about Facebook (like being annoyed by all the applications, or concerns about strangers looking at your wall, or worries about people knowing too much about you) are things that you can actually control by changing your settings. I enjoy Facebook, but I definitely think it's much better once you learn enough about it to be able to customize it to fit the way you want to use it.

You are absolutely right. The main gripes I hear about Facebook are all things you can control very easily.

Hide all the applications you don't want to see. Hide the people from your 'home' page that post too often for your liking. Block the people who you don't want to contact you BEFORE they get around to finding you.

No ones photos go to your wall unless they tag you. They may be in your news feed but you can control nearly every aspect of that.

Make sure your page is set to friends only. Make sure your photos are set to only friends too.

You can set up custom lists for just about every thing. I have photos only my closest family and friends can see.

You can control who can post to your wall or who can or can't read it.

You can make yourself completely invisible in searches.

I know, I know....people don't want to spend time setting up their preferences.... The quite griping about what you can control or deactivate your account. No one says you have to stay a member of FB, just because you signed up.

 

[DMRick]

On Facebook you use your real name. I am still on the fence and my friends and family think that I am a Luddite, LOL!

Nope, you don't have to use your real name. You can be anyone you want

 

[jodifla]

Facebook is a great tool, and a lot of fun.

It's easy to control how you use it, and how much information is out there about you.

It's also easy to keep people your friends, but hide their daily postings so you don't have to see if they are on tirades you aren't comfortable with.

The plus sides for me far outweigh the downsides.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

I like it because it is a way for me to find old classmates, and family that I don't talk to on a regular basis.

In fact, I got a friend request from a woman who hated my guts in middle school. She was my friend when she 1st moved into town (7th grade) but once she got to know other kids, she realized how much of an outcast I was, and joined them, only she became the ring leader. I thought it was weird, that after all these years, she would want to be my friend. I accepted her, because we all grow up, right? You know what? She is one of the most compassionate person on my friends list. She almost always comments on my status updates and if I brag about my kids, she offers them congrats and encouragement.

 

[left210]

When you ignore someones friend request do they get an email back saying you rejected them?

 

[clarabelle]

You are absolutely right. The main gripes I hear about Facebook are all things you can control very easily.

Hide all the applications you don't want to see. Hide the people from your 'home' page that post too often for your liking. Block the people who you don't want to contact you BEFORE they get around to finding you.

No ones photos go to your wall unless they tag you. They may be in your news feed but you can control nearly every aspect of that.

Make sure your page is set to friends only. Make sure your photos are set to only friends too.

You can set up custom lists for just about every thing. I have photos only my closest family and friends can see.

You can control who can post to your wall or who can or can't read it.

You can make yourself completely invisible in searches.

I know, I know....people don't want to spend time setting up their preferences.... The quite griping about what you can control or deactivate your account. No one says you have to stay a member of FB, just because you signed up.

You can make yourself invisible in searches?
So if I want to make a page that just a select group of friends and family can see and I don't want new people to find me -I can do that?
Thanks!!

 

[NMAmy]

I was resistant to Facebook. After receiving a phone call nagging me about it from my niece and an email from my cousin within a 20 minute time frame, I finally gave in.

And discovered that I really liked it. You can set up your privacy settings to limit the things others can see or read. You can hide all the game updates. I'm related to about 85% of my "friends." There's nothing on there I'm not comfortable with anyone in the world knowing about me--my 77 year old mother uses it and so does my 84 year old great aunt. It's a great way to stay in touch with my cousins that I don't see very often.

 

[dislaney]

You can ignore specific applications, if you choose to. That way things like "Bejeweled" and the "Give a heart" application won't show up on your feed no matter how often your friends post them.

I have noticed that many of the common complaints that people make about Facebook (like being annoyed by all the applications, or concerns about strangers looking at your wall, or worries about people knowing too much about you) are things that you can actually control by changing your settings. I enjoy Facebook, but I definitely think it's much better once you learn enough about it to be able to customize it to fit the way you want to use it.

I totally agree. I finally gave in and got a facebook and I now have my privacy settings set in such a way that I don't get the stuff I don't want to see and the people I want can see my photos, etc. It did take a little effort on my part to read and figure out how to change all the settings how I wanted them to be. I love it for connecting with family all across the country.

 

[TwinsinCA]

On Facebook you use your real name.

You don't have to.

I too have been bugged by people to join. One friend in particular kept mentioning it. So I set up an account with a fake name and no personal information at all. I have one "friend" so I can see pictures of her kids, and that is it.

 

[RadioNate]

When you ignore someones friend request do they get an email back saying you rejected them?

no

You can make yourself invisible in searches?
So if I want to make a page that just a select group of friends and family can see and I don't want new people to find me -I can do that?
Thanks!!

yes - when you sign up there is a search section in privacy settings. You can make your FB search "only friends" (if you make it only friends....no one who isn't your friend can find you) and not allow a public search.

 

[diznygirl]

Recently two people from my past have emailed or written me to encourage me to join facebook.
I don't want to hook up with people from highschool. There are a few that have "stalker potential"
Is there something I am missing here? Some reason to join aside from staying in touch with old friends?
I feel like these people think I am uninformed and surely if I had a clue that I would be signed up.

I didn't want to join because there was someone I didn't want to find me. Darn, they found me anyway. I guess they just Googled me or hubby - we are on some boards and she found us that way.

So then I joined. My privacy settings are set just for Friends, not Friends of Friends. My husband couldn't even find me!

And I don't post or read there all the time - but I do love playing the games.

Oh, and now people don't bug me to join.

 

[bumbershoot]

If I accept a heart from the friend that sent me one, then I believe that everyone in my friend group will be notified.

Just don't accept hearts. Or any applications. If you go slow and read what you're accepting and clicking through wiht, you'll see that applications take info. I won't do that.

Actually, it's pretty easy. Just don't post anything.

Yep! Make a page, don't share anything on it.

I have noticed that many of the common complaints that people make about Facebook (like being annoyed by all the applications, or concerns about strangers looking at your wall, or worries about people knowing too much about you) are things that you can actually control by changing your settings.

I know, I know....people don't want to spend time setting up their preferences....

Nor do people like to read what they are clicking on. Even my husband clicks on applications, when I've explained to him why he really shouldn't. "but it's just a quiz..." NO, it isn't. It's an info-sucker.

When you ignore someones friend request do they get an email back saying you rejected them?

Nope.

 

[clutter]

You are absolutely right. The main gripes I hear about Facebook are all things you can control very easily.

Hide all the applications you don't want to see. Hide the people from your 'home' page that post too often for your liking. Block the people who you don't want to contact you BEFORE they get around to finding you.

No ones photos go to your wall unless they tag you. They may be in your news feed but you can control nearly every aspect of that.

.

I've actually tried to do all of that!!! No, really, I have. The problem is that I don't know what half of the terms are in the settings. I don't know what the difference is between the wall, a home page, and what the heck's a news feed? Then there's the fact that I don't know how to differentiate between what comes to my page and what goes out. (Insert confused smiley here.)

Yes, I've been meaning to search out the Facebook for Dummies book, but it's a petty annoyance at this point, so I haven't invested the time.

And what's with the fact that sometimes when I go in, posts from days or weeks ago are on the top of my list (wall?)? You're right, I don't get it, but I also don't care to invest the time in it right now. So I just at some of the pictures that come through, at my friend that can't stay out of some cafe, and at happy news that I find.

I know I need a teen, but my dd12 is just not interested in it. Thankfully!

 

[NeverlandClub23]

I only really use Facebook to play Farmville and Mafia Wars I don't get on every day though. I also like to see what my cousin's are up to as I only see them a couple of times a year (if that) and I like to see all of the adorable pictures they post of their kids. No one really uses it to communicate though, mainly just to share pictures (meaning in my little group, I know many people use it as a form of communication). My profile is completely private (except to all of the Disers I've approved as friends to be my Farmville neighbors and Mafia members ).

Oh and I "ignore" practically everyone I knew in high school. I don't care to know what they're doing now and I don't care for them to be in my business. So basically my Facebook peeps are just family members and several Disers. That's how I like it .

 

[bumbershoot]

I've actually tried to do all of that!!! No, really, I have. The problem is that I don't know what half of the terms are in the settings. I don't know what the difference is between the wall, a home page, and what the heck's a news feed? Then there's the fact that I don't know how to differentiate between what comes to my page and what goes out. (Insert confused smiley here.)


And what's with the fact that sometimes when I go in, posts from days or weeks ago are on the top of my list (wall?)? You're right, I don't get it, but I also don't care to invest the time in it right now. So I just at some of the pictures that come through, at my friend that can't stay out of some cafe, and at happy news that I find.

I know I need a teen, but my dd12 is just not interested in it. Thankfully!

I had to start asking friends "what do you see when I do *this*" to figure out what changes happened when I would change things.

News Feed is what I come to when I just go to facebook and sign in.

If I click on my name, that takes me to my page, aka my Wall.

If I click on someone else's name (say, someone in my News Feed), it takes me to their Wall.

If I have my settings so that I don't get certain things coming to my News Feed (people playing Farmville, certain FB friends b/c their posts stress me out, etc), it doesn't mean that THEY won't get MY stuff. So if a friend is bugged by what I write, then they just need to block my stuff from coming to their news feed. They can still click through to read my page/wall, but they won't be "bombarded" by it, which is what it can feel like when someone is posting things that bother you as their status updates, or news they share/link to, etc.

The reason why some old stuff has come up is because FB can't get things totally right! They keep messing it up. I'm sure they are working on it...after all, my friends from junior and HS who is also my FB friend (most of my FB friends are from school, and it was our 20th reunion that caused us to create FB pages!) works for them and posts things like "great energy especially for a Monday!" on her Wall to praise her employees there.