Pregnant 20 year old

[Piecey]

I am not sure if colleges offer health insurance for part time students if they go that route. And what about after mom has the baby? If it is due around Christmas, will she be in school for the semester starting in January?

Again, I'm sure that all policies are different but my policy through WVU covered me as a part-time student. I was required to take 3 credit hours the purchasing semester on any WVU campus. It couldn't be an e-course, an alternative delivery course or anything like that-- I had to actually attend the course.
So, I took a class at a branch of WVU for the Fall 2008 semester- bought the policy for $780 (it became effective the first day of classes, and ran to the day before classes started in August 2009) and that was the only requirement. I didn't have to take classes in the spring or summer so long as I met the requirements for the policy the semester I purchased it. They did tell me that if I'd needed to add DS in June, when he was born, I'd have to enroll in a summer class to be eligible to purchase coverage for him. So it definitely had lots of rules and restrictions, but was so so so worth it!

The policy was underwritten by United Health Care. Their website (www.uhcsr.com) has the specifics of each university health plan they have.

I hope your brother's girlfriend gets all the details figured out, OP.

 

[Liberty Belle]

I love threads like these. You can really tell a lot about a person by what they post.

OP, congratulations. I'm sure it will be a blessing in your life and in your brother's.

I hope the mom is able to stay in school. Like others have said, I'd rather my tax dollars go to her for a little bit than for a long time over and over again because she can't find a decent job with little education.

 

[Liberty Belle]

AMEN!
Wow-some people are really harsh over here-maybe all the "budget" talk makes Dis'ers crabby, LOL

Congrats on being an Aunt!

I've noticed a couple of the posters are "crabby" all the time.

 

[lpereira]

To the original posters question. When we had my daughter covering her under my work policy would make the monthly premium $600 a month from its previous $150 a month. Almost a third of my monthly take home. I found a policy for my daughter from Blue Cross/Blue Shield for $126 a month. She has been on that plan since shortly after she was born. We did get popped out of pocket for expenses pretty much from the time they cut the cord until the time we took her home. No insurance company will sell insurance prior to birth and it took a couple of days to get paperwork done. Conversely if we covered her under my policy she would have been covered from birth. Since it was a Catholic hospital they had a charity program. We got the bill the bill for her cut by 50%.

 

[Tistal]

I came back to this thread just because I knew it was going to take the nasty route it has to further prove to me that I need to stop visiting these boards because of the community.

Every child deserves a healthy, loving home. I'm glad some individuals that have posted have thoughtfully and respectfully offered ways for the OP's bother and his girlfriend achieve that goal. The deed is done, and the baby is on the way. At least the OP's family is trying to help nurture this child into a healthy, loving being. Best wishes and good luck to the OP and her family.

 

[wide awake]

I think some of the "crabby" posters are like me. When I read the OP's first post I see a couple that have kept the pregnancy secret for 5 months. During that time they haven't checked on insurance or daycare...or why would OP be doing the cking ? Nothing about either of the couple increasing work hours or school load before the baby arrives. It is nice OP wants to do free day care, but as any of us w/ children know this is a huge responsibility...and one I see offered LOTS, and then 2-3 months into it withdrawn. I have a sense the mom to be got pregnant because she wanted to...I see that a lot too. Old enough to decide to have a baby, but not old enough to be responsible for it...or she'd have already had the insurance, day care, etc... in place. There is nothing more wonderful than a baby, and all babies deserve responsible, mature parents that do their utmost to provide for them. That means you wait to get pregnant until you can take care of both yourself and the baby. Novel concept.

 

[patsal]

I guess I don't see my reaction as crabby so much as just expecting adults to be responsible for thier actions. I could care less when an adult chooses to have a child, I just don't think it is anyone else's responsibility to assume the burden of that. I know we live in a world that constantly removes responsibility from individuals, but that doesn't make it right. All actions have consequences, good or bad. As an adult you own up to your responsibility and do what you have to do, so that may mean juggling things and working and taking turns going to school. It won't be the end of the world, but sometimes a person has to make sacrifices based on his/her choices.

OP I think your offer is generous and a great way to ease the burden of childcare.

 

[torinsmom]

Again, I'm sure that all policies are different but my policy through WVU covered me as a part-time student. I was required to take 3 credit hours the purchasing semester on any WVU campus. It couldn't be an e-course, an alternative delivery course or anything like that-- I had to actually attend the course.
So, I took a class at a branch of WVU for the Fall 2008 semester- bought the policy for $780 (it became effective the first day of classes, and ran to the day before classes started in August 2009) and that was the only requirement. I didn't have to take classes in the spring or summer so long as I met the requirements for the policy the semester I purchased it. They did tell me that if I'd needed to add DS in June, when he was born, I'd have to enroll in a summer class to be eligible to purchase coverage for him. So it definitely had lots of rules and restrictions, but was so so so worth it!

The policy was underwritten by United Health Care. Their website (www.uhcsr.com) has the specifics of each university health plan they have.

I hope your brother's girlfriend gets all the details figured out, OP.

It may have been so high for me because I am not a traditional student. This university has both on-campus courses and distance education courses.

So, even though you did not take classes in spring or summer, you were covered for the whole calendar year? That is what I was wondering, since the young mom may not be able to take classes right after delivering the baby.

It would definitely be better for the mom to get covered vs. the dad, because then the baby would be covered right from birth. Of course, would the school give her a policy now that covered pregnancy since she's already pregnant? That's one of the reasons I suggested Medicaid for the first year. I didn't take Medicaid as much for me as I did for my son. I was still covered under my mom's plan under COBRA, but my son would not have been covered. Once he was born, and my ex had a job that had insurance, we added him to his, and never re-applied for Medicaid, even though we would most likely have qualified. I know some people do not agree with my decision, but it was what helped us to be more independent in the long run. I pursued my career in teaching, and my ex worked hard to get a better job to support his child. We are doing pretty well, and have never asked for gov't help again.

Marsha

 

[momandkidslovedisney]

I think some of the "crabby" posters are like me. When I read the OP's first post I see a couple that have kept the pregnancy secret for 5 months. During that time they haven't checked on insurance or daycare...or why would OP be doing the cking ? Nothing about either of the couple increasing work hours or school load before the baby arrives. It is nice OP wants to do free day care, but as any of us w/ children know this is a huge responsibility...and one I see offered LOTS, and then 2-3 months into it withdrawn. I have a sense the mom to be got pregnant because she wanted to...I see that a lot too. Old enough to decide to have a baby, but not old enough to be responsible for it...or she'd have already had the insurance, day care, etc... in place. There is nothing more wonderful than a baby, and all babies deserve responsible, mature parents that do their utmost to provide for them. That means you wait to get pregnant until you can take care of both yourself and the baby. Novel concept.

OP HERE:

WOW, she got pregnant because she wanted to? wow...

Actually, my brother and his girlfriend DID tell his girlfriends parents the day the found out. They choose to wait to tell me until they were five months. And that is okay with me (of course I was a bit surprised). When I was pregnant with my child, I waited until 4 1/2 months to tell people because I wanted to make sure everything was okay before I announced it to the world. I had previous miscarriages. I am okay with them waiting.

As for daycare. I am now a stay at home mom, but I went back to work with my first and all of the daycares I contacted told me to come back when I was 6 or 7 months. They didn't want to even discuss options with me until I was futher along. I know this is different in all areas, but where we live I think this is the norm....

My brothers girlfriend currently has insurance through her parents and as others have posted on here...in most places you cannot get a plan for the baby until the baby is born. My brother and his GF ARE checking into insurance options for the baby and I am trying to get some other ideas for them.

Thank you again to those who have offered advise and KIND words.

 

[tinkabella627]

What a ridiculous statement. No one who gets pregnant HAS to finish the pregnancy, nor does the woman have to raise that child. Just because neither may be choices that you chose, it doesn't mean that the "only" choice is welfare.

personal choice...

You still can't take back being pregnant, even if you have an abortion or give the child up. I do not believe in abortion and would never give my child up, so there was no other choice but to raise my son, who is now 16. I was talking about my situation.

I could have quit my job and gotten free housing, food stamps and cash aid in addition to the one years worth of Medicaid and WIC, but I did not do that. Both I and the baby's father worked our butts off so that when that year was up, we had insurance for all of us and enough money to pay for formula. We used the help we got as it was intended, as a hand up.

I guess you think no child should get free lunch or toys through the Toys for Tots program? I mean, its the parents fault for not making enough money to be able to pay for their lunch or buy them a toy. And what about homeless shelters? Should we shut them all down, since many who are homeless are homeless because they did not have an emergency fund?

I think some of the "crabby" posters are like me. When I read the OP's first post I see a couple that have kept the pregnancy secret for 5 months. During that time they haven't checked on insurance or daycare...or why would OP be doing the cking ? Nothing about either of the couple increasing work hours or school load before the baby arrives. It is nice OP wants to do free day care, but as any of us w/ children know this is a huge responsibility...and one I see offered LOTS, and then 2-3 months into it withdrawn. I have a sense the mom to be got pregnant because she wanted to...I see that a lot too. Old enough to decide to have a baby, but not old enough to be responsible for it...or she'd have already had the insurance, day care, etc... in place. There is nothing more wonderful than a baby, and all babies deserve responsible, mature parents that do their utmost to provide for them. That means you wait to get pregnant until you can take care of both yourself and the baby. Novel concept.

Do you think MAYBE they kept it secret because she had a fear of miscarriage?! I know when I get pregnant (and a couple friends of mine are feeling the same way...and yes we are married adults before you judge us too) I don't plan on telling anyone until there is a decreased risk of miscarriage.

Maybe the OP is doing the checking in supplement to what they have done or tried to do. For a first time parent it can be overwhelming and I am sure when I have questions, as an adult, I will still go to my mom or my friend who just had a baby about things.

I think she said the parents are in school full time... that doesn't say how many credits they are taking. So for all you know, they are at the maximum they can take... or can't load up because a lot of college degrees require you to take things in order.

Why do you think the mom got pregnant because she WANTED to?! What a bold idea that was.

I agree with the other posters that said i would rather they get help for a year now than the rest of their lives. I see it too much at my job, parents that can't make a living because they never went to college. If they just take the year or 2 to finish college, things will be much better in the long run.

To the OP, I am sorry I don't have any advice but I think what you are doing for them is great. Good luck and congrats to you and your family!

 

[Purseval]

I agree with the other posters that said i would rather they get help for a year now than the rest of their lives. I see it too much at my job, parents that can't make a living because they never went to college. If they just take the year or 2 to finish college, things will be much better in the long run.

This isn't a knock on the OP or the OP's situation, I'm just trying to figure out the mindset of someone who posts like the above.

Why should money be taken by force from people who had no influence on a pregnancy and used to subsidize those who did when they couldn't afford it? Did you ever stop to consider that if folks knew in advance that there would be no money siezed in order to help them they might be a bit more cautious? What you advocate is rewarding poor decision making and anyone knows if you reward a behavior it's more likely to be repeated than avoided.

I have a son in college and you think that somehow society is better off it you take money I could have used to pay for his education and use it to pay for someone else's education instead just because they acted irresponsibly?

If nothing else I guess we should admire your willingness to be so kind with someone else's money

 

[Tink-aholic]

One other thing that bothers me is that so many people are assuming that this couple will do better financially if they go to college. During these economic times, college is not only not a guarantee of better wages, in some cases, a degree can be worthless. Is it better that they work at Starbucks NOW with benefits, or to work at Starbucks four years down the road when they have thousands in student loans and they can't get a job in their chosen field??

Maybe one of them should choose a trade. Plumbers and electricians can make a very nice living, and nurses always have work (usually with benefits).

 

[Hannathy]

This isn't a knock on the OP or the OP's situation, I'm just trying to figure out the mindset of someone who posts like the above.

Why should money be taken by force from people who had no influence on a pregnancy and used to subsidize those who did when they couldn't afford it? Did you ever stop to consider that if folks knew in advance that there would be no money siezed in order to help them they might be a bit more cautious? What you advocate is rewarding poor decision making and anyone knows if you reward a behavior it's more likely to be repeated than avoided.

I have a son in college and you think that somehow society is better off it you take money I could have used to pay for his education and use it to pay for someone else's education instead just because they acted irresponsibly?

If nothing else I guess we should admire your willingness to be so kind with someone else's money

I agree! I have a DD in college who has a lot more loans than she may have had to have if I didn't pay so much in taxes to supplement those who don't take care of themselves and their responsibilities.

That is why I mentioned adoption-it isn't a dirty word. It used to be the responsible thing to do in cases like this when they couple couldn't afford the child and wanted to finish school. Rather than making everyone pay for what they should be paying for. they knew they couldn't and would give it to someone who could. This is why it is so hard to adopt a child now. When there was less go ahead we will not hold you responsible and will pay for your irresponsibility women would choose the best for the child and themselves and put it up for adoption when THEY couldn't support it.

For all the go ahead have it and make everyone else pay are you willing to check a box on your taxes for them to take out an extra $1,000 or so every year to support this thinking?

 

[tinkabella627]

This isn't a knock on the OP or the OP's situation, I'm just trying to figure out the mindset of someone who posts like the above.

Why should money be taken by force from people who had no influence on a pregnancy and used to subsidize those who did when they couldn't afford it? Did you ever stop to consider that if folks knew in advance that there would be no money siezed in order to help them they might be a bit more cautious? What you advocate is rewarding poor decision making and anyone knows if you reward a behavior it's more likely to be repeated than avoided.

I have a son in college and you think that somehow society is better off it you take money I could have used to pay for his education and use it to pay for someone else's education instead just because they acted irresponsibly?

If nothing else I guess we should admire your willingness to be so kind with someone else's money

It isnt just "someone" else's money...it is everyone's including my own... and this ONE COUPLE isn't going to make your taxes and what not go down any less. I would rather it be them that gets help than a drug addict or lazy person...I know a lot of parents that get government help, not because they had an unplanned baby but because they are just useless and don't work. Do you know what their kids want to do when they get older....THE SAME THING...they want to "stay at home like my mom". At least this baby will see her parents working hard to finish college and get a degree. A baby is a miracle, planned or not. I sure hope a situation like this never falls on anyone's lap in your family... and the same goes for other posters who agreed with this one.

And to the poster that said college doesnt guarantee better wages... it may not IMMEDIATELY but at least they will have a better shot at a CAREER and not a JOB at some point. Work at starbucks instead of go to college...what a joke! Maybe work at starbucks WHILE going to college, but not instead.

None of us know anything about these people except that they are 20/21 and are in college and expecting a baby, but people are so quick to judge....

 

[tinkabella627]

To the OP, like I said above I know nothing about their college degrees, what they are going for or what classes they are taking but here are some ways that maybe they can try to work more hours and still go to school full time...

See if any of their courses are offered online through their school. Most online classes can be done at their convenience, and can most certainly be done when the baby is sleeping.

Try to schedule as many classes as they can right in a row so that maybe they only go to school from 8-12 and can work from 1-?whenever you are willing to babysit for.

Also, some schools have saturday or night classes, so maybe one of them can take those while working during the day so that the other can be out of school and work by 4 or 5 or even 6 and can get the baby from you.

It will take longer to finish school this way but they can also cut their course load to only 12 credits a semester, possibly taking all 4 classes on Tues/Thursday and working MWF or vice versa.

They can also take classes during winter break and summer break. One class during winter and 2 or 3 over summer can help them to lessen the load during the year so they can work more and still be able to finish their degree in a decent time.

I think you said your brother is 21 so he should only have a year or so left right? And she should have 2 or 3 left right? That is not that long for them to get on their feet. I am not sure if they get financial aid but that helps and they may be eligible for work study jobs right at school. I didn't qualify for financial aid so I don't know much about it but if they already have it, it is something to look into. If they don't have it yet they might want to apply to see if they will get it, especially after the baby is born.

I know these don't answer the insurance question bc I don't know much about that, but I do know a little about college

 

[momandkidslovedisney]

One other thing that bothers me is that so many people are assuming that this couple will do better financially if they go to college. During these economic times, college is not only not a guarantee of better wages, in some cases, a degree can be worthless. Is it better that they work at Starbucks NOW with benefits, or to work at Starbucks four years down the road when they have thousands in student loans and they can't get a job in their chosen field??

Maybe one of them should choose a trade. Plumbers and electricians can make a very nice living, and nurses always have work (usually with benefits).

OP AGAIN:


My brother has a little over a year left for his degree. I am not sure of the exact degree, but it is something in business.

My brother's GF is going to a technical college for a nursing degree. She has two+ years left. Her classes are from 8 - noon, Monday - Friday. She currently has a part time job, but is looking for another one with more hours until the baby is born. After the baby is born she hopes to get a job that will allow her to work an afternoon shift so she can continue to take morning classes.

 

[momandkidslovedisney]

I love threads like these. You can really tell a lot about a person by what they post.

OP, congratulations. I'm sure it will be a blessing in your life and in your brother's.

I hope the mom is able to stay in school. Like others have said, I'd rather my tax dollars go to her for a little bit than for a long time over and over again because she can't find a decent job with little education.

Thank you!!

By the way...LOST is one of my all time favorite shows!!

 

[momandkidslovedisney]

You still can't take back being pregnant, even if you have an abortion or give the child up. I do not believe in abortion and would never give my child up, so there was no other choice but to raise my son, who is now 16. I was talking about my situation.

I could have quit my job and gotten free housing, food stamps and cash aid in addition to the one years worth of Medicaid and WIC, but I did not do that. Both I and the baby's father worked our butts off so that when that year was up, we had insurance for all of us and enough money to pay for formula. We used the help we got as it was intended, as a hand up.

I guess you think no child should get free lunch or toys through the Toys for Tots program? I mean, its the parents fault for not making enough money to be able to pay for their lunch or buy them a toy. And what about homeless shelters? Should we shut them all down, since many who are homeless are homeless because they did not have an emergency fund?

Thank you for sharing your story. I hope my brother and his girlfriend are able to do exactly what you did. Work their butts off in the next couple of years, so they don't have to struggle in the future.

 

[BubMunkeyBles]

OP AGAIN:


My brother has a little over a year left for his degree. I am not sure of the exact degree, but it is something in business.

My brother's GF is going to a technical college for a nursing degree. She has two+ years left. Her classes are from 8 - noon, Monday - Friday. She currently has a part time job, but is looking for another one with more hours until the baby is born. After the baby is born she hopes to get a job that will allow her to work an afternoon shift so she can continue to take morning classes.

She should look into CNA work once the baby comes maybe. Often they can get full time easily, pays okay (not great, but definitely over min wage) and most hospitals/nursing homes offer benefits. It will also make her more employable when she graduates from nursing school since she'll have hospital experience (which is becoming more and more important). A nursing degree should do her very well in the future though.

 

[tinkabella627]

OP AGAIN:


My brother has a little over a year left for his degree. I am not sure of the exact degree, but it is something in business.

My brother's GF is going to a technical college for a nursing degree. She has two+ years left. Her classes are from 8 - noon, Monday - Friday. She currently has a part time job, but is looking for another one with more hours until the baby is born. After the baby is born she hopes to get a job that will allow her to work an afternoon shift so she can continue to take morning classes.

Has she looked into working as a nurse's assistant at the hospital? My friend did this part time for a couple years and just got full time. She is currently not in school and does not have a nursing degree but plans to go for it so I know the degree isn't always necessary and since she is in the program they may let her! My friend works 3pm-11pm and gets insurance! Maybe this could be a possibility for her?