Poll: Do you and your spouse sleep in the same bed?

[themilesfamily]

We're a no.

I snore. DH has restless leg syndrome and kicks all night long.

We slept in the same bed for about the first 5 years of our relationship. We just got to the point where we were SOOOOO tired. We needed some sleep and now we're in separate bedrooms. We LOVE it.

 

[JodiR]

My dh works 3rd shift so we sleep at different times. If he isn't working the weekend, I still sleep elsewhere. I am so use to sleeping alone that I can't sleep if he is there.

I also have sleep apnea so it is hard to use the machine with someone else there.

 

[ICF]

who knew that roughly 20% of couples on here sleep in different beds.....I never knew it was that common.

 

[monorailsilver]

We do but there are some nights I wake up & can't fall back to sleep so I go to the couch.

Then there are nights I wish my husband would sleep on the couch since he snores.

 

[bumbershoot]

No. It all started when DS and I got sick about 2 years ago. DH didn't want to get sick, so he slept on the couch while DS and I slept in the family bed. And then HE got sick when we got better, so he stayed out there.

When he came back to the bed, it was so happy! But...in the 2-3 weeks, I'd grown accustomed to the quiet. He'd grown accustomed to NOT being poked every 5 minutes when the snoring got too horrible. When he's asleep, even if I gently pat him, he feels it as though I've hit him. Thankfully he believes me that I'm not actually hitting and kicking him, but that doesn't stop his sleeping self from thinking that I'm doing those things.

So he has chosen to sleep on the couch. I keep saying that since it works better that way, we should get him a bed, but he just doesn't want to do that at this point. Sometimes we swap, and DH sleeps in the family bed while I go to the couch, but that's usually when I'm sick and whiny and need the ability to turn on the light and read when I feel junky.

Ironically 1 month ago I would have said we slept separate and have for a couple of years due to the snoring. We have both lost a lot of weight and the snoring is no longer an issue (we missed each other terribly)

I do hope that happens! DH's snoring is so much worse now than it used to be, though it's also gotten better than it HAD been...since there has been improvement, I do hope that it will change.



It's actually kind of funny that we've come to the separate bed thing. Before I married, I always felt that marriage would be nice, but sharing a house would not. I wanted separate, but next door, houses. That can't happen unless you have lots of money OR started off as neighbors to begin with, so I've dealt with sharing my living space. But in a way, now, it's more along the lines of what I thought I'd like.

It has made it easier for him to sleep while on his work trips, I'll give it that! He has a hard time sleeping away from us, but it would be been harder for him if he were used to sleeping in the same room with us.

 

[Darsa]

When DD and I were gone for a week in February for the Heritage Tour, one thing I kept getting from my DH is texts complaining that he can't sleep in the bed when it's empty He said "the dog just isn't the same!" LOL, I hope not!

My mom and dad always slept in the same bed; I've been wondering how hard it's been for my dad to sleep without her there. But, she was in the hospital for almost a month before she died, so I guess he had time to get used to it...

 

[Chelley00]

We don't. DH works nights, I work days, and he works every other weekend. I'm so used to sleeping without him in the bed that when he is home every other weekend, I cannot sleep because he snores (quietly, but still, when you are used to peace and quiet.....)

When we're on vacation or something, I spend the first day or two not sleeping getting used to the noise, and then I can manage the rest of the time. This is why we like to travel, we actually get to sleep together

 

[Minnesota!]

Other.

We coslept with the kids for the first 4.5 years of being parents...and just stopped last July. We hadn't shared a bedroom in 2.5 years at that point. When we started sleeping in the same room again, I got so fed up with his snoring that I made him get a sleep study and VOILA - sleep apnea. Snoring taken care of, but now I just really don't like sharing a bed/bedroom.

So....while we technically share a bedroom...I would say a good chunk of the time...one of us is somewhere else. Couch, in one of the kids' beds, recliner, etc.

I would say that in my circle, it's more common to not share a bed. Now that I think of it, of all my friends, only my 2 BFF"s share beds with their DH's.

Hm.

 

[hellokitty86]

Yes... best decision we ever made was upgrading from a Queen to a King bed! We sleep much better now.

Us too. Before we had a king bed we would both sleep miserably- me because my DH moves CONSTANTLY and him because I was waking him up all the time to tell him to stop moving. Often times he would go on the couch so we could both sleep peacefully. We sleep SO much better now with the bigger bed. We could never go back to anything smaller than a king! And I love sleeping in the same bed now!

 

[Barbossa]

He knows it, but I can't force him to go.

DSIL had the sleep study done, and uses a CPAP machine but...in his sleep he ends up pulling it off each night, so he and our DD are back to sleeping apart most of the time again.

I realize how difficult it can be to get us guys to see a doctor. It was only after I had a bad cold and woke up gasping that I was convinced that I needed a sleep study.

The latest CPAP masks are very light and reasonably comfortable. The fact that I can breathe freely when I put it on before I go to sleep is a joy. I wouldn't (and probably couldn't) think of sleeping or napping without it. I feel more refreshed in the morning, and I don't doze off in meetings or at stop lights , which is another bonus.

 

[rina900]

I'm one of those people who needs space for sleeping. When someone....anyone....is touching me while I sleep, I wake up every time they move. Want to know what that feels like, over long term? Kinda like the days of having a newborn baby who never sleeps through the night. So while we do share the same bed, I will change my location during the night pretty frequently (good ole couch).

So while this earns me the "worse wife ever" award, it is not something I can change. And falling asleep while driving isn't something I'll risk (I have come close.) So I'm pretty much done feeling guilty about it.

I'm like this too, I don't like to be touched while I sleep, but we very rarely sleep apart. This is why we have a king sized bed

 

[wdwfan16]

DH and I always sleep in the same bed. We are cuddlers and fall asleep in each others arms. DH sleeps poorly when we are not able to sleep togther.

 

[DisneyFan32WI]

Hubby works 3rd shift, so most days I have the whole bed to myself.

 

[bigbabyblues]

Yep, we do, 2 nights out of 3. DH works 24-hour shifts every third day or so. He doesn't sleep well when he's not home. Even though I am a cuddler, I like having the bed to myself, too. Best of both worlds, I guess.

I have a co-worker who has a separate bedroom from her DH.

 

[Aisling]

who knew that roughly 20% of couples on here sleep in different beds.....I never knew it was that common.

I'll increase that 20% a notch. DH and I don't sleep in the same bed. We each have our own room. I don't sleep well unless I have A LOT of space, the room has to be cold, and I like to keep the TV on all night. He'd get up in the middle of the night to close the window and I'd wake up so uncomfortable. When we started arguing over it every night, we decided to sleep apart and it's worked out great for the both of us. It doesn't interfere with, ahem, other things.

 

[themilesfamily]

OH, oh...almost forgot...here's another reason why DH and I sleep in different rooms, (in addition to the snoring and restless leg syndrome.)

My DH gets up for work at 6:30 a.m. He sets the alarm for 5 a.m. and repeatedly hits the snooze button until he has to get up -- so the alarm goes off every 8 minutes from 5 a.m. to 6:30 a.m. That's approximately 10-11 times that the alarm goes off while I'm trying to sleep.

Have fun with the snooze button in your OWN room.

 

[ShuisFan584]

We sleep in the same bed. Considering we've only been married for two months, I would think it would be a bad sign if we were already sleeping in separate beds!

DH's parents don't sleep in the same bed. They have twin beds in their bedroom.

My parents (married 27 years) slept together for the most part. But now that I moved out, my mom loves sleeping in my old bed since it's more comfortable. Plus, she said my dad rolls around like an elephant during the night.

 

[momof3Disneykids]

untill recently my husband spent almost every night on the couch, beacuase we both have issuses. I am like you ans want/need space. he has a hard time getting to sleep and (untill recently) we had no tv in our room. he is starting to sleep in our bed a little more often and I dont sleep too well

I'm one of those people who needs space for sleeping. When someone....anyone....is touching me while I sleep, I wake up every time they move. Want to know what that feels like, over long term? Kinda like the days of having a newborn baby who never sleeps through the night. So while we do share the same bed, I will change my location during the night pretty frequently (good ole couch).

So while this earns me the "worse wife ever" award, it is not something I can change. And falling asleep while driving isn't something I'll risk (I have come close.) So I'm pretty much done feeling guilty about it.

 

[ilovefh]

DH and I share a queen size bed. We have the opposite problem though. We've been staying at my parents house while we get some work done on our house and we've been sleeping in a king size bed. I hate it! We tend to sleep close together so in the mornings I feel like I have to roll over 15 times to hit the alarm! Count me in as another who can't sleep as well without him. He is on call sometimes and when he is out overnight I am up most of the night!

My friend's parents have separate bedrooms. He snores and moves around a lot and she is a VERY light sleeper. It doesn't say anything about how they feel about each other.

 

[CathrynRose]

Yes, I don't know any couples in real life that sleep in separate beds/bedrooms.

Now you do!

We don't.

He moves too much. Drives me absolutely nuts. I don't think he ever falls into a deep sleep. Always moving.

He likes the TV on when he sleeps, I like it off. I like a sound machine, he likes that damn TV. I like the room cold (window open in winter) with layers and layers of blankets, he likes it warm with one thin blanket. We do not sleep well together.

He sleeps on the couch, or the extra room. Works fine.