People who beg for money - do you ever give?

[ChrisnSteph]

Yesterday we were at Home Depot, and when we made it back out to our car, a man walked up to my dh and asked him if he could load all our things into our car for some gas money. He said he was going to Oklahoma and needed money for gas. My dh politely told him no thanks, and the man said, "ok, thanks anyway" and walked away. I felt bad for the guy, so I reached into my purse, pulled out $10 and asked my dh to give it to the man, which he did, and he seemed very grateful. I just thought to myself, here we are, loading $500 worth of home improvement stuff into our nice Suburban, and here is this man, in a beat up car, asking to load our stuff for gas money. Who knows if he was even really going to Oklahoma - he obviously needed the money more than I did at the time, and it make me feel better to give it to him. I'm usually one to give the guys or gals holding signs on freeway exits a dollar or two. In the summer, we usually carry extra waters and snacks in a cooler in our car. When we see someone who is begging on the street corner, we'll give him a couple bottles of water and some snacks. We like to do stuff like that every now and then. Am I the only one who does this?

 

[sajetto]

I don't because most of the folks begging for money out here, you see buying drugs in broad daylight right in the street!

If they would use the money to feed or clothe themselves that would be fine but I'm not going to fork my money over to see someone buy meth with it.

Of course this area is filled with drugs and crime so I guess its a little different

 

[poohandwendy]

In the circumstance you describe...I would have done the same thing (and I have).

The way I look at it, after the money leaves my hands, it is between that person and God (what they do with it).

So, no you are not the only one.

 

[Aimeedyan]

I know a lot of homeless, or very poor, personally... I usually don't hand money out but instead see if I can help them with their immediate needs. I see them regularly at our church because we have various ministries for them. We usually don't give out cash but we have meals during the week, food pantry, clothing closet, medical assistance, help with various paperwork issues for gov assistance, etc.

I usually am approached down near my work and I invite them to come down and see if we can help them - they always know about our ministries anyways so it gives us something in common to talk about =) I honestly don't have cash on me 99% of the time so I don't give it out but I don't think I would if I did - unless something just told me to, you know?

I also carry things in my car. There is a man near my work that stands on the corner with a dog he's adopted - I carry dog stuff, too, to hand out to people like that.

Through the ministries we have, I have grown more and more of a passion for our homeless. I am convinced they are one of the most misunderstood groups of people in our country. JMHO.

 

[JVL1018]

I've never seen anyone ask for money, except when I go into the NYC and have some guy scrub my windshield with newspaper and then ask for money for "cleaning" my windshield.
Thankfully it is rare that that happens anymore,I think it was Guiliani who cracked down on all that nonsense.. and when they used to, no I didn't give them anything, I wouldn't even roll down the wondow, they scared me!

 

[poohandwendy]

I don't because most of the folks begging for money out here, you see buying drugs in broad daylight right in the street!

If they would use the money to feed or clothe themselves that would be fine but I'm not going to fork my money over to see someone buy meth with it.

Of course this area is filled with drugs and crime so I guess its a little different

I totally understand what you are saying and it is easy to be jaded by those who are scamming. But...you just never know when your spirit of kindness will cast light in the darkness of someones life just when they need it the most. I choose to travel the naive path where it is possible.

I do not hand money over to anyone who asks...but if I have a feeling it *may* do some good, I will do what I can.

 

[BethR]

The way I look at it, after the money leaves my hands, it is between that person and God (what they do with it).

As the years go on, I find myself feeling more and more like this. Who knows if we are being scammed? But I would rather err on the side of being charitable.

 

[Stacerita]

Depends. Sometimes I do, but there are lots of times I dont. It just depends on how its asked to be honest. In the situation you discribed, I would have. He was offereing to do something to "earn" the money and not exactly begging. If there is someone outside a supermarket asking for money so they can eat, I will offer to buy them food. I dont feel quite right giving money outright. I also make sure I give them a business card to my church which has a food pantry and other outreach programs.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

I totally understand what you are saying and it is easy to be jaded by those who are scamming. But...you just never know when your spirit of kindness will cast light in the darkness of someones life just when they need it the most. I choose to travel the naive path where it is possible.

I do not hand money over to anyone who asks...but if I have a feeling it *may* do some good, I will do what I can.

I look at it the very same way. Out of the dozens of people I've handed a little bit of money too, if only one or two actually used it to feed themselves, to put gas in their car to get to a better place, or to feed their kids, then it makes it all worth it to me. I also don't hand money out to everyone - I usually go with my gut feeling.

 

[HaleyB]

I do. I know some of the people begging are addicts, but lots of others are marginally insane and not able to care for themselves. I figure even if they are addicts, who am I to judge. I have never been in their shoes. I give when the urge hits me and once the money is out of my hands I really don't think about where it is going.

My first ever encounter with begging was when I was with my older brother somewhere. I was about 10, I think. Anyway a homeless guy asked us for money, so we asked him if we could buy him a hamburger (we were right outside a McD's). He was so very grateful. I know he was hungry. I don't know why. But he was hungry and we had the means to feed him so we did.

I do think giving to an organised charity that serves everyone equally (so not the Red Cross) is a better way to donate, and I do that too. But yeah, I am one of those people that not only hands a few dollars out my window, but also looks the person in the eye and wishes them better luck. Because they are human and I really don't think it is easy to ask for a hand out.

Call me a bleeding heart, it is true so I don't mind.

 

[robinb]

It must be the city girl in me. I do not give panhandlers money and I wouldn't have given the guy at Home Depot money either.

 

[sajetto]

For those that we have seen walking the streets before and are suffering from mental and physical aliments, my DF has given food or bottled water. However, we've been approached in dark areas by those who are obviously competent and clothed, not to mention well fed asking for 5 or 10 dollars. Sorry, but no way...I know exactly what they are going to do with the money I worked hard to earn. However, I certainly wouldn't mind giving food to someone in need or providing work of some sort

 

[makinorlando]

I have in the past, but I don't encounter that so often these days in my "stomping ground". There is one gentleman, and I am sure a Viet Nam vet who is homeless, and has a morning routine which puts him near the Dunkin Donuts I go to on occasion. He also has the sweetest dog. I have given him cash, as well as food for the dog.

 

[Free4Life11]

I know a lot of people find people who beg to be annoying and a nuisance. I've never really been bothered by it. And not to sound selfish, but it really DOES make you feel good to give! I'm not saying give me a trophy, but it's nice feeling to help someone in need. Like others have said, what they spend it on is between them and God. Lord knows I've bought some questionable things before.

I prefer to give to charities because they can do so much more with our money. There are times I wonder why someone would beg but not go to a shelter/mission? But I also know that there is a limited number of people they can help. Really depends on if I have cash and the situation.

My old church never gave out cash. But they did give out bus/train passes and McDonalds gift certificates. I like that idea.

 

[MrsKreamer]

I don't give money, I give food. When I was younger there was a homeless man I saw every now and then...he stood near a bus stop close to a Wendy's. So I would go through the drive-thru and get him a couple of things off the dollar menu and then go hand him the bag. He always thanked me.

 

[poohandwendy]

Just wanted to add something else:

When I was in Chicago a few years ago, (frigid January, as a matter of fact), I saw many, many 'beggars' asking for money for food. Then, I also saw people leaving very nice restaurants giving their 'doggie bags' to some of them. At first, I thought...ewww, who would want someones doggie bag?

But seeing how appreciative they were to receive uneaten portions of another persons meal...well, it really made me think. Yes, some people are scamming for drug money. But some are just really, really hungry and cold. Whatever got them in that place, they are there and I am in the position to help out a little bit, so I do.

 

[Zmsksirt]

Charity begins at home. It is foolish and potentially dangerous to give any stranger money. You are doing a lot more harm than good. You jeopardized your own safety and your husband's safety. Shame!

 

[poohandwendy]

Charity begins at home. It is foolish and potentially dangerous to give any stranger money. You are doing a lot more harm than good. You jeopardized your own safety and your husband's safety. Shame!

Um, they gave him money after he said 'thanks anyways' and walked away. And to be honest, I really think Chris looks like he could handle himself just fine.

 

[ChrisnSteph]

Um, they gave him money after he said 'thanks anyways' and walked away. And to be honest, I really think Chris looks like he could handle himself just fine.

 

[poohandwendy]

And Steph, you probably wouldn't put up with much BS either, LOL!