Paying kids for doing chores. allowances

[mrsbornkuntry]

My 5 year old ds found a play tent in a catalogue that he wants, I told him that I wouldn't buy it because it costs $50 so he wants to save his own money for it. Now he is asking me to pay him to do chores. I don't have a problem with that, I like the idea of him working to earn money, but I also will not pay him for doing things that I expect him to do, like picking up his own toys, putting away his clean clothes, or putting his dishes in the dishwasher. But if he is willing to do it, I would pay him for picking up the baby's toys, dusting, and other things like that. The problem I have is that first, I don't want him to expect me to pay him every time I ask him to do something for me, for example, "Jordan, will you go get me a diaper?", "How much will you pay me?" That conversation would really start to make me angry! And I also don't know how much to pay him. I have 4 kids and a baby so I have plenty of chores LOL, and if I pay one of them they will all probably want in on it.

Does anyone else do this? How do you handle it? I don't really like the idea of an allowance because over time, like after the first week, they would stop doing chores and still expect the allowance and I think it would get to be a fight every week. I'd rather pay them right after they do the chore so they can see the direct result of their work (especially for the 5 year old).

 

[CarolMN]

We did the same thing with our daughter - she was expected to do some things just because she was part of the family. But we occasionally paid for "extra" things - which were always negotiated in advance.

i think 5 is old enough to understand the difference between a "special chore that we talk about paying for in advance" and the day to day things he does because he's a good person and part of the family. You might have to remind him every so often, but I bet he'll get it. (I had to remind my daughter a few times (and she was older than your son, LOL). It helped when I told her that I didn't ask her to pay me for making dinner or taking her to the movies or driving her to a friend's birthday party, etc. However, I did occasionally pay her for things like cleaning the bathrooms (which I HATE)! Of course, she was a lot older than 5 when I did that, LOL!

You sound like a good Mom - I'm sure you'll find a way to make this work out the way you want it to.

Best wishes -

 

[momm2four]

Right now, we are trying a system where I transfer my kids' marbles from the starting jar to the "happy" jar They can then "buy" things that I have listed on our goal list.

They earn marbles for different things, such as good spelling test grades (Spelling is their weakness) and going to bed without arguing at the appointed time without getting up. I also give out marbles for random acts of kindness and for first time obedience. I don't do this everytime, just sporadically and when I know they aren't doing it just for the marble. The boys know that if they do something and then ask for a marble they don't get anything. I heard my 7 yr old tell my 5 yr. old, "Don't ask for the marble. I learned my lesson on that one"

Anyway, I think you could use that policy with money as well. If you ask for a reward, you don't get anything, b/c that shows you were only doing something for the reward.

Good luck! I wish someone could come up with the perfect allowance system. I would buy their book in a second

Lori P.

 

[jenndisney]

When my daughter was 5, we started to give her an allowance of $5 a week, but only if she did her jobs. I made a chart and each job that was expected of her (making bed, picking up toys, etc...) was worth .25. That helped to motivate her (she likes money). I then made a chart with "extra jobs" and their values. Again, most were .25, but she liked seeing the money add up. We still do this, but the extra's are worth Disney Dollars. She has a check register that we log the Disney money in as deposits, and she withdraws it when we get to WDW or DL.

 

[highland3]

Our DH (8) has a list of chores she must complete each week in order to get her allowance ($5). Our DS (4 3/4) has a list of things we expect him to do. Then we give him a check mark every time he goes above-and-beyond or does something nice (he has been a bit of a nasty little man for a while). For every checkmark, he earns a nickle. It seems to be working pretty well.

 

[soccermom5]

we have 5 children, each child has chores everyday and extra room checks once a week a complete chore chart will earn them $5 they get one oops and get to make it up on sat. if they forget a chore it deducts a dollar some weeks the children only earn a $ some the complete 5 They now have to buy their own toys and extras if we feel they dont really need it it works out pretty good

 

[Taja]

I don't have children, so I'm not much help in some ways.

Here is what my parents did with me (both parents worked):

Basic allowance required weekly completion of all chores on the list. If one chore was not completed, no allowance.

Extra money could be earned when I provided extra services (weeding the flower gardens, cleaning the enclosed patio (not just picking up personal stuff, but really cleaning, etc.).

Half of all monies received (allowance, earnings or gifts) was required to go into my personal savings account. The other half I had to decide to save for souveniers or gifts for others when we traveled, or to spend it on myself during the year. It's a a great money management tool.

My parents never allowed me to withdraw the savings until after I graduated from high school! Not sure if that was good or bad! It was a tidy sum that I knew existed, but usually forgot about, as I knew I couldn't use it!

I like the idea of the basic things expected from a member of the household (based on age) not receiving an allowance, but a value assigned to individual chores that are age appropriate, plus the occasional bonus for random acts of kindness!

 

[pjlla]

Not very helpful, but here is the way it works in our house. DS (just turned 7) and DD 9 1/2 get no allowance. They are expect to do a minimal amount of chores just because they are part of a family and that is what families do. They empty hampers, put away their laundry, and generally clean up after themselves. They take turns setting the table and clearing the dishes on nights when we eat together as a family (about 3-4 nights/week). They do their homework and study hard. As I mentioned, there are no "financial" rewards for this. It is just what is expected in our family. They also know that there are plenty of additional chores available for pay at any given time. All they have to do is ask. As long as their regular chores and homework are done, they can do these "extras" for money. I pay either in cash or in Disney dollars, depending on how close we are to a trip to WDW or DL.

My kids usually get $$ for birthdays and sometimes for Christmas. I usually allow them to keep 50% of this and give me the other half for their college fund. This usually gives them about $50-75 to spend for the year. Since I buy all of the necessities (and them some) this gives them more than enough $$ for goodies and fun stuff (in my opinion). Anyhow, this is just what we do in our house..............P

 

[RobinMarie]

My 7 you dd gets 7.00 a week allowance in order to have her own spending money, be able to budget, and to refrain from the "I wants' everywhere we go. 3.00 a week goes into a savings account to be used for her education (so she feels responsible for funding her education) and 4.00 a week for herself.

She has chores to do because everyone has chores. I do not tie her allowance to it because it is not the system I need or want in place (for others it works well.) I think of allowance as 'money allowed' for her. Unless my dd does something NOT ALLOWED, she receives allowance.

For now, doing 'extra' chores is rewarded with lavish praise and is effective.

 

[zurgswife]

Looking at the amounts for allowance here....$1 per year ouch...my kids get .50 per year. But there allowance isn't connected to any specific chores...they are resposible for certain tasks around the house trash, laundry, table, trying to keep a clean room....

just wondering what other kids get


$1 a kid per year of age would cost me somewhere in the neighborhood of $43 per week...OUCH!!!

 

[RobinMarie]

$1 a kid per year of age would cost me somewhere in the neighborhood of $43 per week...OUCH!!!

That's why we put some away - to encourage saving. In the long run it doesn't cost more because I would save for her anyway.

 

[mist_e_rose2002]

my 12 year old gets $10 a week, but I deduct $1 for every chore he does not do.

I also take money he owes for buying things on "Credit" when he doesn't have his allowance or if he wants something special for lunch at school. I figure since he has free lunch, ice cream, candy or something off the ala carte menu is extra and if he wants it, he can pay for it.

 

[Debbie]

Looking at the amounts for allowance here....$1 per year ouch...my kids get .50 per year. But there allowance isn't connected to any specific chores...they are resposible for certain tasks around the house trash, laundry, table, trying to keep a clean room...

$1 a kid per year of age would cost me somewhere in the neighborhood of $43 per week...OUCH!!!

Yeah, we were in that bind, too. We paid .50 a year while they were younger. Later, we moved it to $$$ per month. And, yep, they had "long term savings", "short term savings", "charity" and "quick cash" jars. Oh, and we had a "TAX" jar, too. (It was a cow that sang "It's a Small World"). Taxes were minimal, and the monies went to a family treat.)

One other thing I did when they were small was to buy treats (chips, ice cream bars, freezies, chocolate bars etc) in bulk. The kids would then buy from me using their "quick cash" and the money going into the "tax" bank. This allowed them to buy their own treats- at a cheaper price than the corner store, and allowed me continued control over their treats.

 

[cookie2001]

My kids 6 & 9 just get $1/week. And if they forget to ask for it and we don't remember they don't get it at all. It's not tied to any chores. I sometimes have the same problem when they want to earn extra money. I hesitate to pay them for chores when I don't think they do the ones they already have very well. I will pay them for extra school work especially in the summer. I will give them $1 for 10 math pages, if it is a really hard page I might count it as 2. My older daughter loves to read and I told her that I would give her $1 for a one page book report. I think she only did it once so I think they just want easy money. Don't we all!

 

[HookdonWDW]

DS is 10, and he receives $5/week for allowance. He doesn't "do" anything for this $5. He has a list of chores he is expected to do because he's a member of the family. He then has a chance to double his money, if he does some extra "for pay" jobs. Those jobs change as we need different things done. He'll usually choose to do extras, but we don't get on him if he chooses to skip them.

Once he gets his allowance, 50% gets put in his bank account, 10% is for him to put in the collection basket at church, and the rest is his to do as he will. He's a great saver, so he usually saves for something special. He's also been known to take some of his "saved" money and add it to his bank account.

 

[pandamom]

We have a system similar to momm2four (we use beads instead of marbles). When we were out shopping if my dd4/dd6 saw something small they really, really wanted (under $2) I would buy it with the understanding it would go into one of the "reward boxes". They could then earn beads by doing extra chores, for extra good behaviour, etc. and save up the beads to "buy" the desired item. Since our Disney trip last fall they have both become rabid pin collectors so the "rewared boxes" have pin replaced with a pin bag. I also use pins for their regular allowance provided they do all their regularly assigned chores (feed and water pets, keep room clean, make beds, etc.).

 

[luckey-lasvegas]

When my daughter was younger I made a list on the computer of things she could do to earn money, and put it on the fridge. For example dusting = .50cents, doing the recycleing = .50 cents, Etc. . It was then up to her to do the chores if she trully wanted the money and I wasn't just handing her $5.00 a week or nagging her for things that didn't get done.

Luckey

 

[geetey]

We have a job worksheet for each of our children. Sunday is Pay Day. Each child has the opportunity to earn a certain number of dollars (based on their age). Each child has different jobs based on their strengths or weakness.

For example: My ds (9 yr old) has the HARDEST time cleaning up after himself when he does his homework and used to spend each morning running around trying to make sure he had everything, despite constant reminders to put everything in his backpack. Now, he gets $1 a week for getting his backpack ready each night and he has to check it off each day he does that 'job'. If he skips a night, we deduct 20 cents. DS can earn up to $8 a week. DD (11) can earn up to $10 a week.

On Sunday night, we tally their worksheet, and pay them in cash in $1 bills. Each puts $1 in their charity envelope, and then splits the rest between Save and Spend. We have been using this system for several years and increase the $ amount they can earn at the end of the summer, after their birthdays.

I really like this system because the kids help come up with ideas of jobs they can do. There are still basic things they do that they do not get paid for. When we went through the 'job' list last time, we added some more difficult items and removed some more basic ones, on their suggestion. I think it shows growth in responsibility on their part. We also want them to equate that WORK = MONEY. Too many of their friends just get things handed to them. It's mind-boggling what some children get 'just because'.

PM me if you would like a copy of the worksheet, or if you have any questions. Good luck!

 

[golfgal]

Our kids don't get an allowance. We gave them the choice of an allowance or having mom and dad pay for things like going to movies, etc. They chose the latter. I have a list of "extra" jobs that can be done to earn extra money for things like Playstation 2 games they want to buy. The amount they get paid to do a job is directly related to how much I like to do that job. They get paid pretty well to scrub the kitchen floor, for example. It works for us and they are learning some valuable house cleaning routines.

 

[Mamajules]

My 11 year old gets $10.00 a week, but he has a list of chores (outside of his room kept clean) that earns him that money (including helping mow the yard in the warm months). I deduct for chores not done, bad behavior or missing homework at school, etc. I no longer buy him stuff every time we go shopping, or certain toys or video games he wants. He decides what he wants, what he can afford, and budgets for them. He is also responsible for his Scout dues.

Last summer he went on a student ambassador trip with People to People for two weeks. Because I didn't want him to carry a bunch of cash, we got him a Visa Buxx card (preloaded preset debit card for teens). Now I place his allowance on that at the end of every month and he can access his balance online at any time. Right now he is saving a portion of his money towards our Disney trip in September for spending money.