Pass the Pixie Dust please

[kimis]

If anyone has any extra pixie dust I could sure use it. I planned my dh and I's 4th trip almost a year ago. We are due to arrive in 8 days. Yes, one week from tomorrow we are supposed to be there. I am praying and hoping that we will be. Since I planned the trip my mom got diagnosed with cancer and passed away 3 and 1/2 months later. She has been gone for 3 months now. THan last Friday my dad slipped and fell in the shower and broke his ribs in 16 places. Yes 7 breaks in the front right side and 9 breaks in the back right side. He also punctured his lung so his in the hospital. I am trying to decide if I should go ahead with the trip. I am power of attorney for both. My two sisters think I should.. WHat do you all think? My dh says I need a break. I am already feeling guilty. Any suggestions would be helpful. Thank you

 

[chip91]

That you have to deal with all of this.. Not to sound "grim" but is your Dad's diagnois/fall "life-threatening" or is it more a matter of stay in the hosptial XX days, rehab XX days.. If his diagnosis is not life-threatening than I would go, as he is in the best place possible to be cared for, and I don't think you going is being selfish or should make you feel guilt-ridden, listen to those who love you most/know you the best, your sisters/dh.

Good luck with whatever you decide, I know it won't be easy.

Chip

 

[Tinker_]

Wow kimis, it sounds like you have had a really hard year, I am really sorry. I understand why you feel guilty, and don't blame you for feeling that way. Are your two sisters close enough to dad to help take care of him? If so, it sounds like your DH is right, you DO deserve a vacation with everything that has happened this year.

 

[kimis]

No it is not life threatening now it was when he first fell. Actually I couldn't get him to answer the phone at his apartment for a couple of hours. I tracked down one of my adult sons who went to check on him and found him. He had been in the shower for 2-3 hours. Also my mom was the most fantastic mom ever (not perfect just fantasic) but my dad has never been what you would call father of the year. No one wants to deal with him. He will have to go from the hospital to some kind of a facility to care for him.
You say the same things my dh says. Thanks for the pixie dust.

 

[armomof3lvsdisney]

I'm so sorry, I think you deserve a vacation

 

[wdwfamilyinIL]

I too think you should get away, everyone needs a break. Its sad to hear about your parents. I noticed you stated you were poa, you might want to see if one of your sisters could take that on a temp. basis while you are on vacation.

 

[MeMom]

The fact that you are feeling torn shows what a kind person you are. Allow yourself to go and have fun on the vacation, and then you can come back and take care of him. A more relaxed and happy you will give you a better state of mind to help him.

 

[eacatwork]

My mom goes through something similar nearly every time she tries to go away - be it for a week or just a weekend. She still goes...mostly because my dad threatens to kidnap her if she doesn't come willingly.

My dad's argument is similiar to your DH's...everyone deserves and is entitled to some rest, relaxation, and fun. You can return to contend with your dad's medical situation rejuvenated and refreshed. You are lucky that you have support from your siblings. My mom should be so lucky...

Go, have fun, relax and enjoy. You've earned it.

 

[kmjmom]

As long as you believe your Dad is good hands, you can certainly stay in close touch by phone and still enjoy your well deserved vacation. So sorry for your loss. A change of scenery sounds like a positive prescription to help you take some time for yourself. You need to think of taking care of yourself too!