And yet, somehow I do not see your theory of open warfare on bullies as a solution.
No. That is one way to deal with a bully, but it should be the last way you deal with a bully. All proper avenues should be tried first (informing a parent, the school, etc.).
I don't know you, so this is a bit awkward, but I do believe that you are lying. I highly doubt that several teachers joined up with the bully against you. I'm sorry, but after that bizarre accusation, I can't take anything you say seriously.
Schools are not telling students to "put up with it". They are telling students to report the behavior so that they may deal with it.
No, she did not deserve a broken nose. She deserved to be disciplined by the school(detention or suspension). I still think it sad that an adult would think a teen would deserve a broken nose for taunting another child. Her behavior was absolutely wrong, and the little boy did not mean for her nose to get broken. According to the OP, the little boy felt bad that her nose was broken. At least this 7 year old child has the maturity and compassion to understand that what she was doing was wrong, but not deserving of physical damage to her face. It's really sad that adults can't see what is obvious to a 7 year old child.
She didn't necessarily deserve the broken nose. But she did deserve to get pushed. But, you know, maybe she will think before she gets up in someone else's face. It may make her stop and think that there are consequences for her actions. I would have felt bad if it was one of my kids that pushed her and I may make an effort to make sure the child is ok and extend a hand of compassion. But that doesn't mean I don't think that her falling was a natural consequence for her actions.
Yes, it does in many situations. In a recent incident with my son, the bully was suspended for five days with the knowledge that if another incident happened upon his return, he would be transferred to an alternative school. He was also switched out of my son's class. I haven't had a problem since. Same thing with an incident a few years ago. I used the proper avenues, the school dealt with it and the problem was resolved. My point is that using the proper avenues should be utilized first. Physical violence should be a last resort if defending yourself from physical harm.
And you are under the assumption that those 5 days of suspension will make that bully NEVER bully again? Really? The only way that will work is IF the parents back up the school. If they just let it be like 5 days at home with no other consequences, it won't stop a blessed thing. Of course YOU haven't had a problem since, he isn't in class with YOUR child. That doesn't mean he didn't go on to bully someone else.
In the OP's case, no. I'm sure that child will not get a "wife beater" mentality form this incident. This is because he is blessed with responsible parents that are teaching him how to handle himself with maturity in situation like this. Now, some of the other posters on this thread who are telling their kids that it doesn't matter if it is a girl or boy, just swing away - that is sending a horrible message to their kids and very well could lead to them resorting to violence, whether against a boy or girl, in situations that do not require a physical response.
Both of my boys were taught to defend themselves if they needed to. When older ds was in the 4th grade, he came to us and said that there was a problem with some girls in his PE class. They were pretty much tormenting the boys because they thought they were "untouchable". He reported it, we reported it; nothing done. My last letter (along with several similar letters from other boys' parents) to the PE teacher simply said that he had been given permission to defend himself. He knew the difference between just "hitting a girl" and defending himself. Neither of my sons have gone on to be wife beaters. That is a different mentalitly anyway. Defending yourself is not being violent or overly agressive. A wife beater isn't just defending himself, he is not able to control his anger. Totally different thing.
Most parents can still figure out a better solution, than resorting to violence. If the teacher is not responsive, then you go higher up - an assistant principal, the school principal, the school board. Someone will listen. After all the school shootings, violence, etc., bullying is taken much more seriously than in the past. No school is going to open themselves up for a lawsuit for failing to act against a bully.
going higher up, will help in some instances but not in all. Besides, sometimes all your really accomplish is getting the bully away from your kid and on to someone else. That is really not a solution. I don't go around advocating violence and my children knew/know that they better not every start trouble with anyone. DD has never been in a fight in her life, and the only ones either of my sons were in the school considered them to be defending themselves. You cannot say "no school" becasue you do not know what the policies are in each school. In dd's school, an investigator is called in and he/she talks to all of the kids in that grade. The bully they had last year was bullying everyone and she was able to get several kids to tell her about it. But if it was only one or two and they were scared to tell, then what? Would the investigator do any good? Probably not.
I am not sure about other posters that don't have a problem with a bully being hit, pushed, etc. but my rule with my kids is that we do try other things first. If the bully doesnt' stop or if the bully lays a hand on them--they have permission to defend themselves.
I've worked with several bullies. My first degree was in teaching. Through college and a couple of years after, I worked as an assistant and counselor at a private school. You are wrong on your "attack more" theory. That may happen, but I doubt it is the norm. Your experience was unfortunate and unusual that after taking it up with the school principal, it still wasn't rectified. As I pointed out above in the incidents involving my son, the situation was rectified by the school becoming aware of the situation. In my experiences dealing with other bullies on the job, us being informed of the behavior did not increase the bullying, rather the behavior was halted.
You can't really compare bullies on the job with school bullies.
I have worked in public schools as an assistant also, I have worked closely with a principal and school board to deal with some bullies (not my son's, unfortunately) and have several family members and friends that are in education and have discussed bully problems with them and no I am not wrong. SOME bullies see that as another sign of weakness and will continually badger the victim about it. You may not want to consider that not all bullies fall in your ideal description but that is just the facts.
I think it is wrong to make a blanket statement like that. We had a similar incident several years ago with a bully and I had my son include him when he passed out his birthday invitations to the class. At the party, the "bully" was the most well mannered kid there. He wanted to help with everything. He was so excited to be at the party. He made a comment to me that nobody had ever invited him to a party before. It was really sad. My son did become friends with him, and he truly was a sweet child. It later came to light that the mother's boyfriend of this "bully" was physically abusing him, which is probably why he was lashing out at the world. I remember one of the last times I saw him, he had a black eye and big bruise on his arm. It was one of the worst days of my life - having to call cps. Yes, originally he was a bully, but he really was an extremely scared young boy, and once shown kindness he responded positively. So no - "all a bully knows is aggression" is false.
No, not false. False for some, but not all. SOME bullies only know agression. You said yourself the boy's mom's bf was abusing him. He responded to being included in your son's birthday party. That doesn't mean that he knew how to react to situations without using agression.
I'm not saying that anyone should put up with bullying behavior. I'm merely saying that there are better ways in dealing with a bully, than physical retaliation. And teaching this, will only better our children as they grow up.
Hopefully it does not come to this, but I would hope if that was the case, the judge would take into consideration the entire story and not just that my child pushed her child and her child got hurt. My poor boy was very sad that he hurt her, even on accident. I actually THOUGHT I was taking it easy on him by taking the TV and DS from him for a week.. I mean, 1/2 the time he does not even WATCH tv or know where his DS is so I figured... we'd use this as the lesson something he might miss a little, but not like taking his bike or toys from him.. those he would REALLY miss 
.. he also knows (from our MULTIPLE conversations about this) that what the girl was doing was NOT ok and but that we prefered he handle it differently and we have discussed other examples. I see what a PP means though about his size putting him at a disadvantage and feeling threatened. I don't want to be the parent visiting thier child in the hospital or worse, but I also don't want to be the parent getting served with court papers either! isn't there a middle ground somewhere!!!!! 
Thanks everyone
