Parents that don’t get it – “I want my kids to remember it ..”

[dvczerfs]

i keep seeing posts about being old enough for no naps!

come on!!!!! i have been going since i was 7 and i am now 48, been there way to many times and to this day, i still nap everyday between 2 and 4 while at wdw.

good thing i don't go with you people, you would have one 48 year old grumpy old man walking around with you.

your killing yourselves. you will never see it all as much as you try. all these trips and i haven't seen it all. in fact, they keep changing it before i can see it all.

 

[missourimomof3]

We decided to wait til our youngest turned 4 for our upcoming trip because we've vacationed other places with babies in tow and while pregnant, and it's no picnic. We also wanted to wait until our kids (9, 6, 4) really understood what Disney was and get them familiar with the characters, otherwise they'd have no clue what they were experiencing.

I can easily see how Disney could be a turn off to some people - the price, the crowds, the heat, etc. This will be my husband and kids' first time going and I'm apprehensive because he does not have the patience for crowds (I hope by going late Oct/early Nov will help). And he nearly passed out at the price tag.

I don't see Disney as a trip we would take every year, because there are other places I would like for my kids to see. I know lots of people who have gone and loved it and I know people who've gone and who say they'll never go back. It's not for everyone.

 

[Minniekins]

I think there is so much more to a Disney trip than if they remember it. There's much to be said for just living in the moment of the magic! (Memories aided by pics for later, lol). I think that it's great to take the little ones to Disney when they are young. Being so young and innocent, they can experience the meeting of the characters and princesses in an especially magical way. And they will be experiencing in the moment and so excited and believing in the magic of those characters. And the parents will be the ones with those fun and wonderful memories, seeing that precious joy in their young children. And what's wrong with that? My daughter has been going since she was almost 2. And I love those memories she made for us while she lived the moment of meeting her fave characters, especially Donald Duck when she was 2, running after him and loving on him, she was so excited! And she loved hearing about her earlier visits as she has gone on making new visits over the years. And though she's been a lot of times, and is an adult now, DD is almost 24, she doesn't particularly remember the trips even when she was older, like 12, certain things of course, but not the whole trips for sure. So I'm glad we took her(only child), while she was very young and throughout her life, experiencing and making all sorts of memories and magical moments, different for each of us, at different times and stages in our lives. Not everyone can do this, I know, and agree it certainly is very expensive! And though it's not for all, we've been very blessed and happy to be able to include Disney as a somewhat regular part of our lives!

 

[aprildsygrl]

This upcoming trip will be my DH & DS7 first, & only my second. For my DH, growing up his mama was a single mom with 3 boys to take care of. Being on a single income they never went on vacations. For my family we were beach ppl. If it wasn't for having an opportunity in high school to go with our band I wouldn't have never gone either. I always new I would want to take my DS to wdw some day, and have waited for him to be a bit older not only to appreciate it but also because he wasn't a very good traveler until he was about 5. We do go to the beach at least twice a year, and have gone on other vacations. I'm not sure if we will be repeat visitors to wdw so this maybe our only trip down. But that's ok, there is a lot of places to see and experiences I want my DS to have outside of wdw. I think each family has their own vacationing style, and that's ok. It doesn't mean their children are being deprived. Case in point, I have friends who will never go to places with crowds. Their idea of a vacation fun is traveling across the country and staying at State Parks. Which is awesome and provides their daughter with fantastic educational and historical experiences. But for me, I need to be somewhere with lots of action, and I don't mind crowds much. They think we are crazy for going to wdw, and I think they are crazy for traveling for 24 hours in a rv to stay in the woods...but it doesn't make either one of us wrong. Every family is unique and that's cool by me.

Sent from my iPad using DISBoards

 

[BubblyTrip]

it is fair to have your kid miss out on one of the greatest experiences in life? Meeting those who live in your imagination? meeting the fairies, princesses or Buzz Lightyear, or how about the Mouse himself? Sorry to those I have left off... step sisters, aliens, dwarfs, dogs, snowmen and fine china...

Many, many people do not consider Disney one of "the greatest experiences in life." And many people's kids do not have Disney characters in their lives (and are just fine without them).

I like Disney and find it magical. I hope to take my kid there several times as he grows up, but I kind of hope he cares about the other vacations we take more. Camping, National Parks, international travel...to me, these are more important. I was lucky enough to do all kinds of travel growing up, including DW, but I assure you when I think of those trips, DW is not one of the life changers I remember first. I remember it fondly, but it wasn't life altering.

To each, his own. We all make choices for our kids based on what we think is best for them, and I have no issue with anyone that doesn't want to spend their vacation dollars on a theme park trip, or only wants to do it once.

If I was only going to go once, I certainly would do it when my kid was older.

 

[DaniMoon]

If we could afford to go every year, I probably would have taken my kids since they were babies. However, it's not a yearly thing for us. Things have changed and we might be able to start going every other year.

For me, I did not want to go to the park and not be able to enjoy it as a family. I didn't want to spend the whole trip on kiddie rides or not being able to ride at the same time as my husband because one of us had to stay with the kids. Once the youngest his 40 inches we could all ride almost everything.

This is also the reason we probably won't be doing Universal for another couple years because there are still a few rides that my youngest won't be tall enough to ride. It's a lot of money to spend, and he does get disappointed when he can't do something, so we can wait.

 

[Eddygirl]

We waited until our kids were a bit older for a few reasons. Our first DL trip was when DS just turned 6 and DD was 9 going on 10.

We thought that a DL trip would be a one time thing and did not want to deal with naps, strollers and splitting up for different rides due to having a younger child. It was great! DS walked the whole time including back and forth to our off site hotel. The kids enjoyed the same rides with a few exceptions where DS did not want to ride....however it was him that dragged us on TOT! When we were there we knew we made the right decision *for us* after seeing so many stressed out parents of small tired grumpy children. There were lots of happy families with small kids too.....but we knew we would have been in the stressed out group.

When we got home the kids decided we needed to go back....and we agreed! We set up "The Disney Jar" and saved as a family. We all gave up something to fund "the jar". DH and I bought no lunches at work for 2 years! The kids made pizza friday nights and put the $50 we would have spent in the jar. Same went for when they asked for treats they would have the choice of treat or $ for "the jar". Two years later we went back and had a FABULOUS time! The kids were active in the planning of the trip as this was their money too! They really appreciated everything we did because they earned the trip! And there were extras this time like tours and a meal at Blue Bayou and staying CL at the hotel.

Now we are 2 months out from our first DW trip! This time to celebrate my big 4-OH!! "The jar" returned to it's place of honour on the kitchen counter although this time DH and I funded the majority as this trip is almost 3x's what our DL
trips were. We still funded the jar as a family and have added a lot of "extras" to the trip as a result. We are now doing a split stay between a Mod and Deluxe, we have PH with water park option on our tix, we have some good ADR's we wanted and are starting at Universal for 3 nights. The kids own a lot of this trip as well!

For us as a family waiting until the kids were a bit older worked for us! As a result we are now a family of Disney addicts that will have fun planning and saving for trips together for many years to come!

 

[Gumbo4x4]

^^^^^The throngs of totally MISERABLE people we noticed at MK all had one thing in common - they were either small children, or parents of small children.

Not to say ALL such families were miserable, or even half of them. But, there were LOTS. And I'm thankful that never was us.

 

[wifey1220]

We started going to Disney when my oldest son was 2. Maybe he doesn't remember that first visit but the memories I have are wonderful. And I know he loved it. We have continued to go every yr. taking babies as young as four months. It is what we love.

 

[SEA333]

My sister in law is one of those "have to give it to my kid because someone else did" type of people, so she took her daughter to WDW when her DD was 3. Well, that was awesome and all, but guess what? Her DD is now 10 and in 5th grade, and now my kids have gone (twice) in the past few years...her stepbrothers have gone in the past few years...many of neice's friends have gone...and even though neice *has* gone, she doesn't remember a darn thing, and begs SIL to take her because "It's not fair that everyone else went when they can *remember* it, and I went when I was a BABY and don't even remember ANYTHING! It's like I've never even been there!"

Lesson here? (other than neice needing a good...well, you get my drift) The real lesson is, if you do not plan on taking a kid time after time so they can build their memories each year, taking a kid under the age of about 7-8 is just going to get you a crying sniveling mess of a tween. LOL

Nah...just kidding. My neice is a sweetheart, just a little misguided by her poor mother, is all (who is also a sweetheart, FWIW).

The ACTUAL lesson is, kids honestly do not remember much when they are very young. I went to DW when I was just out of first grade and can BARELY remember any of it. We took our kids when they were 11, 7, and 6 and I do not expect younger DD and DS to retain all of it, so we brought them back this year when they were 9 1/2 and almost 8. I know that as time goes on, the memories of both trips will melt together into a singular experience and they will love the memories.

We waited till they were the ages they were due to logistics and finances. But I am very glad we did! We are ALL about experiences as learning tools with our kids, but there are only so many times DS13 can look at me with surprise when I tell him that he has been up in the Sears Tower in Chicago, and to the theatre in Toronto, and swam in Lake Superior, and climbed the sand dunes in Sleeping Bear State Park, and has biked around Mackinac Island in Michigan, and has seen the mountains, oceans, and prairies because he was too young to remember any of it! I'm glad *I* was there for him to experience it, but he sure as heck doesn't remember any of it!!!! Sorry, but you could have an awesome story about hanging with your parents while they are catching a lion barehanded in the wilds of Africa, but if you have to add "...but I was so young that I don't remember any of it" to the end, it's a little on the anti-climatic side.

 

[DCbride]

I think the key theme in reading the response is - can you go every year (or several times a year) or is it a every 5-10 year trip? People who can go often, do- the age of their children do not make a difference. People who have to make a choice when they can go, wait. (And people who prefer other styles of vacation-camping/lake, etc do not seem to want to go often either so I put them in the group of waiting until the perfect age)

The wonder of a toddler looking up at a character, then a preschooler hugging her favorite princess and of course a school age child who is able to ride "all the rides" .. all are exciting times. (If you have multiple children, you might want to wait until everyone is in the "tall enough" or no stroller stage.)

We live 30 minutes from the Jersey Shore, 40 minutes from Great Adventure and about an hour from Sesame Place. We went to the shore 1x last summer, we have never rented a house and have no desire to stay longer than a day trip, we have never taken DD6 to great Adventure because I think of it as a theme park, just there for the thrill rides, and we used to get Sesame Passes when she was little but haven't in 2 years.

But, we go to Disney 3 times a year. It is how we like to vacation, we know what to expect from the parks and CMs and out of 21 trips with DD6 (her first trip she was 10 months) we have only had one trip not provide us wonderful family time and while she might not always remember the details she is experiencing sights/sounds/smells that only Disney magic can bring IMO

 

[usnuzuloose]

I can only speak for me, but my ex husband would not allow us to spend that kind of money and stated he hated theme parks and would not go. I took my daughter 1 time to DL. That is the only remembrance I have. The ex only did things he wanted to do, which was camping. And that was when he wanted to go. So we did not vacation much at all.

 

[SweaterGirl]

This is an interesting thread. We are planning our first Disney trip as a family (DH has been, I haven't) for next year, when DS will be about 2.5. I've had plenty of people tell me, unsolicited, that he won't remember it and don't go until he's older. I know he may not remember details, but the trip is for us, too, and we do plan to go back in the future. So I agree with the theory that if it's a once in a lifetime trip, maybe people wait longer/think the kids need to be older.

 

[SweetMissy]

I don't get it either IF they can afford to go. My sister and BIL for instance...have 3 kids (almost 8, almost 6 and almost 3 year old). Every year my sister comes up with a new excuse as to why they're not going with us. They have no problem buying a new drum set, laptops, kindles, etc etc. They never take their kids anywhere or do anything with them, I feel bad for them. The new excuse is they want to wait until the youngest will be able to remember it. Ok, I get that, but what about the older kids? Remember it? I only remember bits and pieces as a teen, so I'm not sure when they plan on going, lol.

 

[Kristina4109]

By sharing my thoughts on this I am by no means trying to diminish anyone else's. I value and respect that there is no "right answer" to how old a child should be before they go to WDW.

I started going to WDW at the ripe old age of 6, and returned so many times that I practically grew up there. When my husband and I moved to L.A. I was 25 years old and fell in love with DL.

When my daughter turned 1 we took a family 2-day trip to Disneyland. We did it because my husband really likes Disney and I LOVE DISNEY and there was no WAY I was going to skip a yearly (sometimes more) trip to Disneyland. I make no pretense about it - I did it for ME. My daughter has no memory of that trip at all, but she gets a kick out of looking at the photos and I still remember, with a huge smile on my face, when she first met Minnie Mouse, stared at her, and grabbed her nose. Since then, she has been to DL more times than I can count, seriously, and that place is "home" to her.

WDW is different for us because, as many people have said, that's a much more expensive trip (especially if you live in L.A.). My daughter was 4 when we first went, and the only reason we took her that early is because we were celebrating my parents' 40th anniversary with a huge WDW reunion. I was skeptical about the trip because I thought, like so many others, that my daughter wouldn't remember it or get as much out of it.

Well, I am so glad we went. Sure, she only remembers a little. But she had a blast. I still remember her hopping out of her stroller to yell NI HAO in the China pavilion.

Now that she's 8, we're prepping for a big trip to WDW and in a way it seems like her first. It'll probably be another 5 years before we'll be able to do it again, so we're kind of going big.

So I guess my thoughts are...there is no one answer. It depends on your kid, it depends on your circumstances, it depends on your economic situation. And yeah, there are people out there who just don't like Disney like we do!

 

[smiths02]

We really like Disney, and I plan for my older son to go 4 times and my younger ones twice. Reasons we don't go often:
1) Finances: When kids are young, there is either daycare or mom not working (we have twins...our daycare bill was over $20k last year). So it would make more sense financially to go when they are school age
2) Vacation time: parents with younger children are often younger themselves and newer to a job PLUS we have to use our vacay for sick kids, etc. I work for a school system. I can only go at the most crowded, expensive, and/or hot times of year (much harder with toddlers)
3) The kids don't care...really...we spent $1000 and lots of man hours on a playground. When we go outside, my toddlers just stare at the $10 Elmo bubble machine for an hour screaming "Elmo" "bubble" Seriously. EVERYTHING is magical at 17 months old.
4) As my oldest son gets older, I realize there are other vacations I'd love to take with them

Our first trip was planned when DS1 was turning 3 b/c we could keep costs down by sharing a room with my ILs, no tickets and food costs for DS. Knowing my ILs are older, I knew they might not be active enough to go again 5-6 years later.

2nd trip with DS1, he was 5. He remembers bits of this. This was spur of the moment as a pin code came right when extra money came.

3rd trip DS1 will be 9, twins almost 3. I wanted to take advantage of child and toddler pricing plus DS1 will likely remember.

4th trip? Maybe when twins are 6/7 and DS1 is 12/13.

 

[chrismb22]

So I guess my thoughts are...there is no one answer. It depends on your kid, it depends on your circumstances, it depends on your economic situation. And yeah, there are people out there who just don't like Disney like we do!

100% correct. We took my son at 2 and had a ball. I didn't care if he remembered it (as so many people told me it was a waste of money).

We are lucky enough to be on the three year plan however so he'll certainly remember this trip (he'll be 5) and then when he is 8 it will be an entirely different trip again.

That might not be right for everyone though. Who am I to say what's right and what's not.

 

[disneywalkers]

I must confess.... We go yearly (this year twice) and have 6 kids ranging from 2-16. Our 2 year old will go for her 4th time this September. So here's my confession......

I do not go for or because of the kids. I/we go for and because of me lol

Yah I'm terrible right? Lol

If they remember it then that's just gravy

Now if I didn't go yearly I would understand the age thing BUT with our broad ages not sure I could figure out the best/right age

 

[Aliceacc]

I LOVE our Disney trips, and look forward to them. But they're expensive. (And, yes, I know: we could certainly cut corners, starting with those Deluxe resorts we love. We could find someplace offsite that would accomodate 5, or try the family suites, and save a few hundred dollars.) We've been saving for this trip for 2 years, and our Vacation Account finally has enough to cover the whole trip.

But I don't think it has to be about "parents not getting it" or about bad trips as a child. The reality is that, for a LOT of families, a WDW vacation is expensive. For many families it's a once in a childhood trip. So lots of people choose to wait until either they can afford it or until they're fairly sure that their youngest will actually have those memories to cherish. Photographs simply don't take the place of those "remember the time..." conversations.

Six hundred Seniors from my school will be traveling to WDW in a few months. For some of them, it's a return to familiar territory. But for a number of those 17 year olds, it will be the first time. (For some it will be the first time flying anywhere.) Their parents are looking at college costs, after 4 (or 6 or 7) years of paying tuition for our school. Some have also faced bills like Orthodonture (each of my kids cost $5000 there, not covered by insurance.) Some pay for things like travel soccer or hockey teams, or gymnastics lessons-- those expenses can be tremendous. Some are from single parent families, struggling to pay the bills. Some lost their jobs in 2008 and still haven't found a job that brings in anywhere near as much money as they used to have.

We've done a lot of vacations at upstate Lake George. No airfare. No park tickets. Food at a much more reasonable cost. (Accomodations are more or less a wash; a room by the lake that will accomodate 5 is pretty close in price to the Disney Deluxes, at least if we get the discount I'm hoping for.) And, when my kids were young, we did a lot of vacations at my parent's vacation home in the Poconos. It's not that we "didn't get it"-- it's that I was a SAHM, we were a single income family, and a WDW vacation was simply out of reach.

 

[grossmansr]

I'm actually the opposite of most people. I think the best time to take a child is when they're young. For a young child, the magic is so real. I took DD at 18 months and now at 2.5 yrs. Even at 18 months she could enjoy Dumbo and It's a Small World (for example). Plus, the pictures are priceless. I plan on taking her every year until she's around 8 or so. By that age, I think she'll be ready for more "mature" vacations to NYC, Colonial Williamsburg/Busch Gardens, and (gasp!) Universal.