Parents, sigh.......what would you do? UPDATE post 18!

[npmommie]

My dd does gymnastics, she has been doing the recreational classes since she was 2 and 2 years ago she started the levels program, well she is still on level 1 and I can see she is frustrated with it. She insists she loves it and thinks its fun, but I also see the disappointment when they announce who is moving up a level. last spring she was very upset. She has one skill on bars that is holding her back and truth be told, they don't work on that area every week, so it has been several weeks since she has even had an opportunity to practice bars.
Soooooo, I don't want her to lose self confidence and I realize she will not excel at everything she does, but My inclination is to push her in the direction of a different sport where she may do better, she is a natural swimmer and softball player,so there is a swim club here and I am thinking of signing her up, she loves swimming, and my ulterior motive is she will love it so much and maybe want to back off on the gymnastics and go back to the recreational classes where there is not so much pressure.
any thoughts?

 

[luvdzne]

This same thing happened to my DD. She ended up so frustrated she quit. She was never going to be good enough to compete anyway. How about putting her in just a tumbling class. They work on cartwheels, round offs, back hand springs.....Both my girls do cheerleading so this is perfect for them.

 

[missypie]

I was going to suggest the same thing...tumbling class, perhaps leading to competitive cheer. So many girls want to do gymnastics for the tumbling anyway...I really haven't met a little girl who has her heart set on bars.

Natural talent has lot to do with gymnastics, as it does any sport. My daughter did gymnastics for 8 years. Although it was fear of beam that did her in, after training for over a year, she never got her giant. She retired last spring. Her friend has now been trying to get her giant for almost 2 years. But there were other girls who were Level 6s with them who got their giants in 2 weeks. Seriously. Those girls didn't train any longer or harder, but they got in 2 weeks what some girls don't get after 2 years. If you don't have the natural ability, it's a hard road.

 

[npmommie]

Thanks, i was thinking of having her try one of the tumbling classes, I do think she would like that..... as that is what she is strongest in anyway of the areas. beam and bars not so much at all.
I think next week we will try a tumbling class and see how it goes.

 

[TimeforMe]

I think it is very important to find something that kids can excel at and feel good about themselves for. I think it's absolutely fine for your dd to explore other possibilities. You didn't mention how old she is, but it's sometimes better to "cut your losses" so to speak and not go too far with something that there really is no future in. Good luck.

 

[npmommie]

I think it is very important to find something that kids can excel at and feel good about themselves for. I think it's absolutely fine for your dd to explore other possibilities. You didn't mention how old she is, but it's sometimes better to "cut your losses" so to speak and not go too far with something that there really is no future in. Good luck.

Thanks
She is 8 yo so to be still on level 1.....even if she moves to level 2 this year, I am just not sure how far she will go, if she even remains enthusiastic about it.
I just want her to have fun, have self confidence, and enjoy whatever sport she does.
I just hate seeing her frustrated and disappointed. It breaks my heart.

 

[FSUDisneyGirl]

I read this thread earlier, and didn't respond. But then, I thought...

I was your daughter!

No, seriously. I did gymnastics for a few years, and COULD NOT do a pull over. I tried, and tried, and tried, but it just wasn't happening. I loved it, but got so frustrated...I remember to this day! So what did I do?

Started swimming. I swam for 5 years and made some of my best friends. I only stopped swimming because I found something I loved more (music) but I was happy doing something that I was not "bad" at. I would definitely let your daughter try some other things (maybe an activity this fall, sport in the spring, something else in the summer). Chances are, she'll find something that comes easier to her or that she likes better, and you can transition out of gymnastics with no bad feelings.

Good luck!

 

[cruizie]

Oh I so understand what you are saying about them not working a skill - how can they learn it if they don't practice it/?? My dd is 6 & is not in the "Levels" yet. Her gym has named levels prior to levels. DD is lacking a couple of major things to move up but they hardly work most of them.

I would sign her up for something else and keep her in gymnastics, if you can. You mentioned swimming - dd did summer league last year and loved, loved, loved it. Of course, her body type is much more conducive to gymnastics (tiny girl) but she will do summer league swimming again this summer.

No real advice but did want to say that you are not alone!

 

[missypie]

Folks, if you are wondering if your 6 and 8 year olds will "make it" in gymnastics, let me say that there are 9 year old Level 6s....maybe even Level 7s.

Don't mean to sound harsh, but the competition is really tough.

 

[rie'smom]

Would it be possible to schedule a few private classes so that your daughter could work just on the bars? We've done something similar for our daughter. She had to get her standing back tuck for her competition cheer team. In no time, she had it.

 

[lovesmurfs]

Would it be possible to schedule a few private classes so that your daughter could work just on the bars? We've done something similar for our daughter. She had to get her standing back tuck for her competition cheer team. In no time, she had it.

That was my thought. I'd talk to the instructor, explain your concerns, and see what can be done to help move her to the next level (legitimately.....). Once she's able to advance, she may decided it's enough, and then try something else.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I would sign her up for swimming. In the meantime talk candidly with the instructor. Find out what she thinks.

 

[mjkacmom]

So far, dd7 has participated in swimming, soccer, ballet, hip-hop, figure skating, gymnastics (pre-team), and is now in her second year of irish dancing. She's definitely a dancer, but since irish dancing is so crazy, I signed her up for a modern dance class at another studio, hoping she'll like it more - so far, it's not working. I'd definitely sign her up for swimming - when dd was in gymnastics, I knew she wasn't going to go too far, but that's not why I want her to participate. I want her (and all of my kids) to really enjoy themselves!

 

[carone0318]

Ok, this is my opinion but realize it is coming from a mom who has a competitive gymnast. Back when my dd was doing rec, she was in the range of 4-6 yrs old. I knew her body type was that of a gymnast, she just needed proper coaching. Well, her rec teacher really did her no justice. I was very frustrated 1 day and called the gym. I was talking to the desk person and they suggested that I change teachers. We did this. The teacher eventually got dd a try-out for the invitational program (pre-team under level 4) we didn't do anything under 4 and she was invited to work with this group.

She started competing Level 4 when she was 8 and is now a level 8 and she is 12 yrs old. Last yr as a level 7 she was state all around champion in her age group. This is a girl that even the head coach would tell you that they didn't want to put her on team.

I guess my moral here is sometimes you have to subtly push, not over-bearing stage mom push, but push. When dd started way back when she did gym, dance classes, brownies, horseback riding and soccer. We are now just down to gym and soccer. She barely does soccer now because of her demands for gym - she's like an honorary player (dh is coach of the team.)

Gymnastics is the foundation for all sports, it provides coordination, flexibility, strength and the list goes on. She doesn't have to be a competitive gymnast to reap those benefits. But, if you feel she is good enough to advance at her own pace and is just lacking certain skills because of training, mention it to the coach. Maybe if your dd got that one skill and built a little confidence, then it could do wonders. A confident gymnast can simply amaze you with what they are capable of doing.

 

[missypie]

Is there a dive team? Once they can get over landing "on their heads" gymnasts often make good divers.

 

[missypie]

One more thing - If there is another gym in town, try that one. Often gyms get an idea of what they think your child can do, so they don't push them. After DD retired from gymnastics, she took tumbling at her old gym for a few months. She wanted to switch gyms and we resisted but finally let her try out a class at a cheer gym. She has improved so much at the new gym. At her old gym, she was no where near having her full; at the new place, she got it in about a month.

 

[npmommie]

So far, dd7 has participated in swimming, soccer, ballet, hip-hop, figure skating, gymnastics (pre-team), and is now in her second year of irish dancing. She's definitely a dancer, but since irish dancing is so crazy, I signed her up for a modern dance class at another studio, hoping she'll like it more - so far, it's not working. I'd definitely sign her up for swimming - when dd was in gymnastics, I knew she wasn't going to go too far, but that's not why I want her to participate. I want her (and all of my kids) to really enjoy themselves!

She sounds like my dd........mine has done swimming, tball, soccer, figure skating, dance, and gymnastics........ all along gymnastics has been the one thing she consistently stayed with and wanted to stay with

I guess my moral here is sometimes you have to subtly push, not over-bearing stage mom push, but push. When dd started way back when she did gym, dance classes, brownies, horseback riding and soccer. We are now just down to gym and soccer. She barely does soccer now because of her demands for gym - she's like an honorary player (dh is coach of the team.)

Gymnastics is the foundation for all sports, it provides coordination, flexibility, strength and the list goes on. She doesn't have to be a competitive gymnast to reap those benefits. But, if you feel she is good enough to advance at her own pace and is just lacking certain skills because of training, mention it to the coach. Maybe if your dd got that one skill and built a little confidence, then it could do wonders. A confident gymnast can simply amaze you with what they are capable of doing.

last spring when she was so upset that she wasn't moving up I asked the coach what she needed to move up, and she said the bars, the "soul circle"........and then said if she got that she would move up......and she thought she would get it over the summer, but I don't think they worked bars enough over the summer so of course she still was in lev 1 in sept........and again they don't work bars every week......so no chance to practice it.

Would it be possible to schedule a few private classes so that your daughter could work just on the bars? We've done something similar for our daughter. She had to get her standing back tuck for her competition cheer team. In no time, she had it.

thats not a bad idea, i will have to look into that

I read this thread earlier, and didn't respond. But then, I thought...

I was your daughter!

No, seriously. I did gymnastics for a few years, and COULD NOT do a pull over. I tried, and tried, and tried, but it just wasn't happening. I loved it, but got so frustrated...I remember to this day! So what did I do?

Started swimming. I swam for 5 years and made some of my best friends. I only stopped swimming because I found something I loved more (music) but I was happy doing something that I was not "bad" at. I would definitely let your daughter try some other things (maybe an activity this fall, sport in the spring, something else in the summer). Chances are, she'll find something that comes easier to her or that she likes better, and you can transition out of gymnastics with no bad feelings.

Good luck!

great story, thanks! I think she will love swimming too! I am definitely going to sign her up, and see what happens

One more thing - If there is another gym in town, try that one. Often gyms get an idea of what they think your child can do, so they don't push them. After DD retired from gymnastics, she took tumbling at her old gym for a few months. She wanted to switch gyms and we resisted but finally let her try out a class at a cheer gym. She has improved so much at the new gym. At her old gym, she was no where near having her full; at the new place, she got it in about a month.

You know its funny you say this, I have been thinking for awhile now that we should try another gym. The problem I find when I suggest this to dd is that there are girls she has been with literally since she was 3, they have all moved up together.........and one of the coachs has been with her back to the rec class days...........so i think for her its a comfort thing. But I am thinking if we go try and I tell her just to check it out without saying we will cancel the current gym she may feel better about trying another gym.

I don't want to be pushy, but I also want her to learn and grow with this, and if there is talent for it to be helped along and developed.
So she can feel good about it too. I just can tell how bad she feels when another friend moves up to level 2 and she doesn't
she does practice with the level 2 group, so she sees what they do..........and she knows what she needs to get to move up. So I will have to see about getting her some more time on the bars and see.

Thanks for all the replies!

 

[npmommie]

Just wanted to update and tell you all that my dd did get moved up to Level 2 tonight! She is so happy, and I am so happy for her!
We are still going to be starting swimming after the holidays, and she is excited about that too
thanks for all the input on this!

 

[rie'smom]

What great news!!! Your daughter must be over the moon happy!!! Tell her congrats from the Disboard!!!!!!!!

 

[npmommie]

What great news!!! Your daughter must be over the moon happy!!! Tell her congrats from the Disboard!!!!!!!!

Thanks!
She is sooooo happy!