parents of ASD kids, how do you handle school breaks?

[KirstenB]

This is in reference to our younger dd Zoe, who's 3 1/2. She started full time special ed preschool in the fall. We're just finishing up spring break, and it's been really hard on her. Every few months, she goes through a big regressive period that lasts a couple of weeks. This time it was over Easter Break.

She has had frequent crying spells, tantrums that I can't trace the source of, and generally shuts down. It started last Saturday, at her big sister's family birthday party. Lots of noise, lots of cousins. Poor Zoe, it was really hard on her. Sometimes she does great with family gatherings.

I took the kids to Busch Gardens Wednesday. Zoe usually loves this. She had a couple of meltdowns this time, and was much more withdrawn than usual.

I'm finally coming to my question, I promise! On school breaks for young children, would you try to incorporate some of the school rituals into each day? Would that be reassuring? She kept asking for peanut butter and crackers for lunch. That's what I often pack in her school lunch. When the kids are out of school, I try to give them different foods from school, just for variety, you know? Should I be trying to have some structured routines here at home to mimic school?

I try really hard to give the kids a break when they're not in school. But maybe that's a bad idea for Zoe. She doesn't seem to crave any particular routine, in general. So I thought she wouldn't miss school.

What do you all do? Thanks as always!

 

[mechurchlady]

The problem is that a person with sensory issues like my mother never stop or take a break from being overloaded. Monday is fine and she is an angel, Tuesday she has lost control over something in life or got stressed and is in meltdowns. Today I saw her hunched down with her hands over her face crossed at the wrist. I had raised my voice and I should as I have issues and she drives me nuts at times.

Kids need breaks but you have totally disrupted her life and turned her world upside down. "OMG where is the schedule" which builds the stress which then circles around like a tornado feeding off itself until total meltdown. You have drastically changed her schedule. For some sensory people and neurovariants there is that need for order so that there is no stress. I hate change even for the better. It is their way of coping with life.

You need to explain to her what is going on and that school will be back soon, give the date so she can watch for it. She needs to know that school will be back as right now you have stolen her precious school from her just like stealing her favourite toy or a cookie. Toy, school or a cookie does not matter but the act of taking something from her has set her off into being overstressed, worrying, and easy to melt down.

Big hugs and hope that helps you understand what is up with the kid.

 

[saveaquarter]

Incorporating the rituals and schedule of the school day into your days at home, like you suggested, would probably be a tremendous help to her. Not having a routine to follow can be devastating. Your other child(ren?) may love the break, but Zoe's mind works very differently than theirs, and it can be hard to remember that sometimes with ASD kids.

And hey, it can't hurt, right?

 

[KirstenB]

Hey you guys, thanks!! I knew my friends here would help me think this through!! I'm going to put together some ideas and activities for summer break. I re-read some Stanley Greenspan yesterday to try to better understand Zoe's thought process, and that helped too.

 

[Forevryoung]

Another thought- our autism programs for young children have much fewer breaks than any other school (including other special ed programs in the same school). For example- the preschoolers with autism had off Thursday, Friday, and Monday for Easter instead of the whole week off plus Monday.

Maybe there is a program where that is available (it should be) to minimize regression and keep the routine going.

 

[KirstenB]

Another thought- our autism programs for young children have much fewer breaks than any other school (including other special ed programs in the same school). For example- the preschoolers with autism had off Thursday, Friday, and Monday for Easter instead of the whole week off plus Monday.

Maybe there is a program where that is available (it should be) to minimize regression and keep the routine going.

Aaagghhh!! I wish we had that. The good news is we do have extended school year, so the month of July, she'll have her routine. I need to ask her teacher for some good ideas for June and August.

 

[1stluvispooh]

Well what I do during breaks and I don't know what it is about spring break but it always seems interminably long! I keep the kids busy. I plan activities, going to museums, the zoo, even a indoor water park. (Someday DH will realize that it's cheaper to take us on vacation during spring break! ) We head out first thing in the morning just like they are going to school and I pack a lunch like they would have gotten at school. It seems to keep everyone happy. Now for the good news. It does get better. DD is now 8 and in 2nd grade and did wonderfully over spring break especially since my car was in the shop half the time and we were stuck at home.

My DD loves extended school even though it's only 1.5 hours

 

[Disneydonnam]

I know the school vacations are very difficult. It seems when we have our routine changed and no structure we go downhill as we are finishing breakfast. We have started talking about what we are going to do tomorrow before we go to bed. We will make a plan of everything for the following day. This has really seemed to help.