parenting issue -- what would you do?

[snoopy]

Originally posted by jennyanydots
older dd is 13 and will be a high school freshman this year.

at the beginning of the summer I bought her a Sony Discman. she goes to travel camp and she likes to take CD's on the bus.

the discman broke the second week of camp. dd was careless and irresponsible.

I refuse to buy another CD player for her.

the question, though...

should I let her use her own money (birthday, allowance, etc) to buy one for herself?

I would. It will be a hard lesson learned -- I bet she won't be careless and irresponsible when its her own money she used to buy it.

 

[pw2pp]

Yes, that is the only way I would let her get another one - If it is HER money.

 

[ckr]

First, if I really felt she needed the lesson on being responsible, I would make her repay me the money I WASTED on the first one. I'd explain that I had worked hard for that money and that I had bought her the discman for her to use for more than 2 weeks. Because of her carelessness, I virtually threw that money away. She should repay me the money since she apparently thought so little of the sacrifice I had made to get her something she wanted in the first place. (Whether it was a hardship or not to afford the discman, she needs to learn that Mom/Dad's money isn't limitless and that we too make choices in how we use our finite amount of money.)

Then, if she wants a new one, let her use her own money.

PS. If I'm feeling at all gulity about how mean I am (which I will!), I would make her a deal that if she took care of her discman properly, I would buy it back from her at full price next year AND still let her keep it. She could then sell it at a yard sale or whatever and use both amounts together to upgrade to a newer one for next summer.

 

[Kallison]

Whenever my kids lose or break anything they use their own money if they want to replace it.

 

[Kallison]

Originally posted by ckr
First, if I really felt she needed the lesson on being responsible, I would make her repay me the money I WASTED on the first one. I'd explain that I had worked hard for that money and that I had bought her the discman for her to use for more than 2 weeks. Because of her carelessness, I virtually threw that money away. She should repay me the money since she apparently thought so little of the sacrifice I had made to get her something she wanted in the first place. (Whether it was a hardship or not to afford the discman, she needs to learn that Mom/Dad's money isn't limitless and that we too make choices in how we use our finite amount of money.)

Then, if she wants a new one, let her use her own money.

PS. If I'm feeling at all gulity about how mean I am (which I will!), I would make her a deal that if she took care of her discman properly, I would buy it back from her at full price next year AND still let her keep it. She could then sell it at a yard sale or whatever and use both amounts together to upgrade to a newer one for next summer.

\\


oooh good answer!!

 

[MinnieM21]

I wouldn't make her repay you, I'd just let her buy another w/ her own money. I've never had anyone buy me something (like my mom when I was younger) and if I broke it, they never asked me for the money that the thing cost, I just bought my own the second time around. You gave it to her, so I don't think it would really make sense to ask for the money that the CD player cost., just let her buy her own and she might understand that those things are cheap. Those things aren't made very well anyway, I bought one recently and I dropped it on my carpet accidently (not very hard..it's the carpet) and it broke.

That's just what I would do, you can do whatever you want of course