Parent going on pirate cruise as accommodation?

[della]

Della, I understand what you are saying, and as a parent I worry about these things as well, but any time our children are in Disney they are surrounded by tens of thousands of strange adults. And screening castmembers is no guarantee. But if you trust your kids with the CM's, then you just have to trust that they will be supervised and are not in any danger from a parent who has to accompany a disabled child.

Beccabunny, I can't disagree with you. I was more trying to point out the feedback that Disney might get. Sorry, I should have been clearer.

I still maintain that a separate "family" cruise allowing any parent would be a great addition. I allowed my ASD child to go with her two siblings. She did well and Disney was great about accomodating her gfcf diet. My youngest has no firm diagnosis (very impulsive) and quite frankly I would be concerned to send him alone or even with his siblings (if they were still young enough to go). If two of my girls were an only child, I doubt they would have felt secure enough to go. Two of my other kids would have gladly gone alone. I think it's great that Disney offers the kids' only cruise. I just think the option of an additional family cruise would serve a lot of people.
__________________

 

[debbiecarr98]

Did you have to pay extra for being included on the cruise?

they did not charge for me to go.

 

[Schmeck]

If they didn't charge for you, did they just add an extra life jacket, or did they bump a CM or something? Are the pirate cruises usually sold out?

How does WDW meet ADA accessibility for the pirate cruise anyways? What would it fall under - is it wheelchair accessible, etc? Or is it on an older boat, so it doesn't have to meet regulations?

 

[robin09]

We did the Disney Cruise 2 years ago. DD was 8 at the time. She has OCD, ADHD, Aspergers, is very impulsive, and has bad reactions to color dye added to food. She is in a self contained classroom with 7 kids, 2 aides and a teacher. I was extremely leery of allowing her to go. I cannot tell you how many phonecalls I made filled with questions, asking if they were certified.. I think you know the drill.

Jenn was thrilled to go, but we did give her the "rules" staying in group, sitting on the boat...

We did the Pirate Cruise at the Yacht Club and literally followed the boat around, we walked around the pier, sat and had coffee and watched the boat. Gave her a kiss when they were "searching" an area off the boat. I think I held my breathe the whole time. She came off that boat with the biggest smile you could imagine, so very proud of herself. She still talks about the time she "found the treasure" and wants to do it again!

I came away feeling really goood about my decision to allow her to go. You have to decide what is right for you and your child. I really feel the CM's were well trained, and if you fore warn them, on the phone and again at the dock, it should turn out fine!

 

[dclfun]

Della, I understand what you are saying, and as a parent I worry about these things as well, but any time our children are in Disney they are surrounded by tens of thousands of strange adults. And screening castmembers is no guarantee. But if you trust your kids with the CM's, then you just have to trust that they will be supervised and are not in any danger from a parent who has to accompany a disabled child.

We've thought about doing the pirate cruise but won't have enough time on our next trip. I would, however, insist on accompanying my daughter if she were to go. For my disabled child, that's reasonable accomodation. She is making progress and may not always need such accomodations, but there is no guarantee of that. Unlike a non-disabled child, we can't just wait around and assume she may someday be mature enough to go without a parent.

I never worry about what other parents think when my daughter needs accomodations. That's their issue, not mine. And if the experience was spoiled by a "yammering" parent (which I have yet to see), if that's the worst thing they have to deal with in life, oh well.... At the end of the day, their kid doesn't have autism, mine does. They're coming out ahead, they should be thankful.

I'm sorry, but I respectfully disagree. Of course we all wish our that those with special needs could participate in everything, but the reality is that sometimes that isn't possible. There are many things at Disney I can't do due to the level of my physical disability, for instance and I have to deal with that and enjoy what is possible. Just because a special needs child or adult wants to do something doesn't mean that they have an entitlement to do so if it changes the basic experience for everyone else. What one parent/child may do if accommodations were made would likely be quite acceptable yet who's to say whether there would be a parent/child who DID ruin the experience for others. Yes, you may feel that others are coming out ahead and should be thankful because their child isn't autistic, but really those others are there to enjoy their vacation just like you are and are just as entitled to do so. I do think it's important to think of others and not just what we "deserve". That doesn't mean that reasonable accommodations for the attractions, alternate waiting areas shouldn't be provided, etc. but in this instance, how much "accommodation" is too much? I agree with those who have said that if something is done for one person,how is Disney to draw the line and what would happen if there were an incidence caused by a parent/child combo? It's each parent's responsibility to weigh how much good the pirate cruise ( or insert other event) will do for a particular child vs. how worried they are about their child doing it solo. If the benefits don't outweigh the risks, then skip it and move on to something else. There is so much at Disney to enjoy. ---Kathy

 

[mamacate]

Sorry, I should probably not jump back into this (this thread has successfully talked me out of even asking Disney about this--at least for the moment), but I am really surprised to see that people think a parent shadowing a disabled child who needs 1:1 behavioral support is such a huge issue.

Maybe I don't understand how this activity works (do they make a big deal about leaving the parents behind? would one parent in the background spoil the mystery somehow?), but I honestly don't understand how it would be disruptive. On the other hand, I have a pretty clear picture about how my son taking something literally and having to be redirected by a CM who doesn't understand autism might be disruptive.

I could be wrong, but I think most parents would not be lining up to accompany their typically-developing kids. It's child care! Novel by the pool time! (Nooner in the hotel room time! ) Right? I go to Disney to spend time with my kids, but I wouldn't mind a fun two-hour drop-off, I admit it. It's just not in my current life configuration, and that's cool. I just thought my pirate-fan son would probably ask about the cruise, since we're staying at a resort that has that activity, and he might see it advertised or see the boat departing, and it's the kind of thing he'd love. And I thought maybe I could say yes. That was all.

I do like the idea of the parent-child pirate cruise option, which would have the nice element of normalizing the need, and meeting the desires of parents of typical kids who want to participate.

I have to say, it's kind of discouraging. Maybe it's just too late at night for me. But if this isn't a "reasonable" accommodation, what is? If we were asking for a cruise all to ourselves, or for Disney to provide an ABA-trained 1:1, that seems unreasonable. But this? I don't get it. Ah well.

In the end, we'll be at Disney, and so far, finding things to do there has NOT been our problem! And we'll have fun, I know that.

Cate

 

[livndisney]

While I have not asked about the Pirate Cruise, I DID ask about a parent staying with a SN child at the Wonderland Tea party. I was told that was not allowed. I explained about the child's needs, and I was still told it was not allowed.

 

[Ms_Butterfly]

Remember that accommodations can't fundamentally alter the nature of the business. In this case, the pirate cruise is strictly for children only. Allowing a parent of one of the kids on the cruise fundamentally alters the nature of the cruise.

 

[aubriee]

Remember that accommodations can't fundamentally alter the nature of the business. In this case, the pirate cruise is strictly for children only. Allowing a parent of one of the kids on the cruise fundamentally alters the nature of the cruise.

True. If one of those kids is having a little seperation anxiety, then sees a parent accompanying another kid, that kid very easily could and would get upset, demanding that their parent be allowed to go also. How's that parent to explain to a four year old that yes that other kid's parent gets to go, but she can't? I guarantee my four y/o GS would not be able to understand why someone else could have their parent there, but he couldn't, especially a kid bigger than him.

 

[bookwormde]

I am reasonably sure that having the parent along would not step over the line of substantially altering the experience for other children. The burden of proof in this area lies with WDW. If it does no children who have physical medical conditions, which require trained monitoring, would be able to participate either.

Explaining the situation to other parents, and even most children is quite simple, the child has special needs and that law requires that the “aid” be allowed to attend to him/her so that the child can participate equally.

bookwormde

 

[Schmeck]

All Disney has to say is that they provide the "aid", not the parents.

 

[Beccabunny]

Kathy, I am fully aware that my child with special needs is not able to do everything others can do. We experience that every day. However, this is not one of those situations. A very simple accommodation would make it possible. The lecture about "entitlement" and thinking of others really isn't necessary. I am fully aware that others are at Disney to enjoy their vacations. You're saying they are entitled to do so, but then say I shouldn't believed my daughter is entitled to enjoy this kind of experience. Are the non-disabled more entitled? Anybody who feels their experience is ruined because of such a simple thing has some real issues. I almost feel sorry for people like that.

 

[Beccabunny]

All Disney has to say is that they provide the "aid", not the parents.

I'd be happy with that. Don't know if Disney would be willing to do it though.

 

[Selket]

Sorry, I should probably not jump back into this (this thread has successfully talked me out of even asking Disney about this--at least for the moment), but I am really surprised to see that people think a parent shadowing a disabled child who needs 1:1 behavioral support is such a huge issue.
Cate

I would not let the thread deter you from asking Disney about the cruise and whether a parent can attend in your circumstances. We're just a board here and not WDW employees and folks like to see how many angels we can get on the pin head.

I think there is never anything wrong in asking about it - perhaps with enough requests they would develop a different type of cruise option for children and parents.

 

[teglazer]

My son has muscular dystrophy, a genetic disease which over time muscle mass is lost. I was wondering the same thing, me or my husband going on this priate cruise. Charlie knows what he is able to do and not able to do, but other people who do not understand this disease will look at him and think he is normal and expect him to be able to do things that he can't. That is my concern. He is not able to go up and down stairs very well, and he cannot run at all, He is also starting to have trouble walking and will soon be permanatly in a wheelchair. I would just like to have him go and not have to worry about him for 2 hours. I will be a wreck. I am going to call and see if they can either let one of us go with him, or provide a person that is aware of his disability and keep an eye on him.

I will post what I find out

Thanks

 

[bookwormde]

"All Disney has to say is that they provide the "aid", not the parents."

I needed a good laugh today, thank you.

bookwormde

 

[dclfun]

Kathy, I am fully aware that my child with special needs is not able to do everything others can do. We experience that every day. However, this is not one of those situations. A very simple accommodation would make it possible. The lecture about "entitlement" and thinking of others really isn't necessary. I am fully aware that others are at Disney to enjoy their vacations. You're saying they are entitled to do so, but then say I shouldn't believed my daughter is entitled to enjoy this kind of experience. Are the non-disabled more entitled? Anybody who feels their experience is ruined because of such a simple thing has some real issues. I almost feel sorry for people like that.

Actually, I would be in agreement that it's okay to ask, but you'd also have to accept the reasoning if Disney said "no". I was NOT lecturing anyone on entitlement although sometimes I do feel that those with special needs feel that their needs take precedence over those of others and we need to be respectful. I can't recall who made the comment about "the other parents should just realize that at the end of the day they're coming out ahead because their child isn't autistic" IMO speaks to entitlement due to a disability. It's not a matter of coming out ahead or not- each child is just as important as the other as is each family's vacation. Of course I'm sure you'd not cause any issues being on this excursion with your child but I can tell you that personally I *have* had a costly special experience spoiled by a mother of a SN child who totally detracted from everyone else's enjoyment. She spent the entire time saying, "happy hands", over and over to keep her child from touching a railing, and then when she wasn't saying "happy hands" loudly, she was screaming "good job!" over and over. There was not a moment when I could hear the CM narrating and explaining about the animals we were viewing ( this was on a special safari at AK) and neither could anyone else, including the SN child and parent. So maybe for you it's a "simple thing", but for me, I and other guests paid for something we did not get because someone else brought along a child who could not participate w/o continual loud verbal cues, let alone the fact that I was almost knocked out and my viewing obstructed as she continually grabbed at her daughters arms to place them back in her lap. So where does that leave people? Should someone in a w/c be left out because there's no ramp or they need physical support that isn't provided, but someone who has behavioral problems be allowed to participate with a parent? Both are special needs. How can Disney guarantee how a parent will behave or that what they need to do to support their child's best experience doesn't infringe on others? I'm only asking these questions to generate a different perspective, not that I feel that those with special needs, both adults and children, should automatically be left out if an accommmodation needs to be made, but can you see why Disney might hesitate and why other guests/parents might have a concern?---Kathy

 

[Schmeck]

"All Disney has to say is that they provide the "aid", not the parents."

I needed a good laugh today, thank you.

bookwormde

Didn't mean it to be funny, as there is nothing in the ADA that says a parent has to be the one that has to give the aid. Disney just has to say that they have enough staff to cover the situation. They don't have to do more than that under the ADA, as having enough staff is considered reasonable accommodation.

 

[dclfun]

Also, since I'm really just trying to generate thoughts and perspectives and I'm really not judging anyone here, I wanted to share a different kind of situation that was in some ways a similar request. I once had a parent who was disabled and travelling ONLY with her 13 year old daughter ask if it was okay if her daughter pushed her in a sand w/c to the adults-only beach at Castaway Cay. In a sense she was just asking for a reasonable accommodation since she really wanted to enjoy that beach as an adult, but usually someone under 18 was not allowed - she could not access that area independently. I asked a manager on her behalf and was told "no exceptions". So did it hurt to ask- absolutely not, but this was also something that was based on age ( adults only) just as the special excursions/events for kids-only are based on age.. Making an exception would have changed the fundamental pretense of the "adult only beach area" and thus even though this adult did have a special need and I doubt her daughter would have caused a problem, Disney said "no". Again...no harm in asking but if what you're asking for changes the nature of the experience for others, you might be told no. I wish they DID offer a certain number of these cruises, etc. where it would be kids AND parents allowed whether sn kids/parents or just any kid/parent who would prefer to participate together. Seems to me that would be a reasonable solution. It really never seems fair that someone with a special need is left out just because they need the assistance of another person- but I do understand "why" based on the perspectives of other participants and for Disney to maintain integrity of the event.---Kathy

 

[bookwormde]

Schmeck

Sorry I was sure you were joking since with your experience you know how long it takes to “brief up” on the particular sensitivities and manifestations, not to mention it being supplied by someone “unfamiliar”

My mistake

bookwormde