Panhandling - What Do You Think?

[ronandannette]

I carry a bag in my car with ziplock “blessing bags”. Each one has a bottle of water, two protein bars, and a calendar of community meals. That’s what I give. They can take it or leave it. And depending on their response, you know what their status actually is.

I love this idea! I trust you wouldn't mind me copying it?

 

[Mysterian]

I think the people desperate enough to beg/panhandle are extremely brave. I hope I would be that brave/strong if needed.

I can’t imagine you begging for anything besides cotton candy.

 

[Mackenzie Click-Mickelson]

I found this to be very offensive for this young woman to be begging on the street for money.

My thought was that if she was able to be out on the street begging wouldn’t she be better served getting a job?

We have issues in our area with panhandlers and most of the time they are scams. Some are very well known, one city I know has made it illegal to panhandle on certain intersections. It can be a nuisance, it can be a safety issue and we know of one that also has been known to abuse his dog (this one lives in a house and it's his dayjob to go to the Walmart to beg for money). Some have used their young children.

That said the two quotes I pulled out are extremely telling. No one likes a scam, it gives those in true need a bad name and it does make it hard to have compassion for those when you don't know their story. However, and this is a large one, for those who are of a true need there are systemic issues at play and using the trite "get a job" line in this day and age is willfully turning a blind eye to issues at hand in favor of lines being fed to you.

I want to share a story about a woman from my area who spent countless hours and about a month trying to locate a woman who has I believe 2 dogs. Bless this woman for all her efforts and for our community who in general really does try to help those in need and yes sometimes they do get scammed for it. This story however is not of a scam, it's of a community of people who went above and beyond to humanize what can be a very dehumanizing issue.

Posted from Nextdoor:

Original post mid-February
"There is a homeless woman and her dog that I have occasionally seen and donated to on the exit of 69 heading onto 135th st. I saw her there again today. I don’t get much time to talk as I can only do that when I have a red light. I managed to get some information and that is that she was in school before the Pandemic. I don’t know anything about her or her situation but she is very nice and doesn’t look like she’s on drugs or anything else.. she LOVES her dog and so cannot really go to the shelters with the dog.. I am really worried about her tonight as the weather is going to be harsh.. I know she has a car they occasionally sleep in and sometimes gets enough money to get a cheap hotel room.. I asked her where she will sleep tonight and she said she hoped she could get enough money to keep the hotel room .. I didn’t have much cash but gave a couple of dollars.. I cannot stop thinking about them and I’m really worried. Does anyone have any suggestions to help? I don’t even know her name.. "

What ensued was 229 comments of people reaching out, working with her to locate this woman, offering up contacts, food, clothes, money, their time to try and locate her, dog food and more.

Update a few weeks later:
"Update. I FOUND HER and was able to get her number ! (Name removed by me) is usually at the same exit around 2.30 daily. She is really needing clothes because she is applying for jobs now that we have secured a few days at the hotel for her for anyone that offered to help before .. of course food vouchers are always welcomed too. Highway 69 S exit 135 st. 34 pants, maybe a medium shirt, 6.5 shoe, sweaters, or coats and jeans may be good and of course any doggy stuff for large Chihuahuas. I know she’s not really into dresses.. "

Update from 3/16
"So, myself and a wonderful human from the Northpoint foundation took her to eat and found out a little more about her situation.. she had odd jobs here and there and went to a technical school and had an apartment.. the pandemic hit and she lost all her jobs.. the school shut down and she lost her apartment.. I am sure there is a lot I still don’t know. We are trying to figure out a plan to help her have a roof over her head long enough to interview for a job and get some money together.. translational living would be great but she doesn’t want to go there.. another past bad experience…; we will continue to work on this ) I know she has another older 14 year old Chihuahua at the extended stay hotel that’s not doing so well.. the foundation cannot cover that cost. If we could find a vet that’s low cost we can maybe take the dog there and raise some money to help with the dog.. I have known vets in LA who took phone payments towards a certain animal who’s owner couldn’t afford to pay. We gave her some clothes and shoes, bathroom supplies, dog clothing and toys as well as dog food and the charity will help with a few nights at the hotel.. that’s the update so far. She is a very grateful and kind person. She wants to go back to school and work part time as she has a disability.. she prefers labor type jobs where she can work with her hands.. odd jobs..even washing dishes and would enjoy jewelry making and has a secret dream to make dog toys .. I am glad she is still dreaming.. that brings hope. Thank you to everyone who has gone out of their way to donate to her.. she mentioned that and wanted me to let everyone know.. she has noticed people being kinder to her, smiling more and giving more since this post was written Hopefully we can get a plan together that can make a real change and get her off the street for good. "

I don't know if this woman who is homeless will be able to stay off the streets but what I can tell you is that in the land of NIMBY that is my county, in the land where there are scammers, there was a woman in true need and our community worked endlessly to get her some. Compassion at times has to over-ride our stereotypes

 

[bsmcneil]

On our way past her I mouthed the words “get a job”. I hope she understood what I was saying and hope no one gave her any money.

Yeah, I really can't imagine mouthing the words "get a job" to someone, regardless of the situation. Seems intentionally cruel. My personal point of view, having experienced brief homelessness as a kid (mom leaving abusive situation) is that (a) jobs can be hard to get even when "everyone's hiring". There are a million reasons why if anyone is genuinely interested in hearing them. (B) Few people choose panhandling and I can't imagine anyone doing it for fun. (C) if it helps you think of it, imagine that what they're doing is their job. They're working for a wage (and that work is talking to you or making their plight public in a way that it never should have to be). As a professional who has worked on issues of homelessness and hunger, there are good reasons to give to organizations and it's never easy to know what is best (only give to orgs, only give food, etc). I personally feel okay empowering people to make the choices they need with what I can provide when I can provide. If it came down to it, would I panhandle to support my kids? In a heartbeat. Would that be incredibly hard for me and dispiriting, dehumanizing, etc (especially if people were to pull a stunt such as walk by and mouth "get a job")? Indeed. I choose not to dehumanize people when I can. May your heart find some softness (and/or may you just not ever see someone in need again - hurting them in a moment of difficulty is next level cruel). If I saw someone act like you (or god forbid if my kids ever acted like you), I would go out of my way to look them in the eye and help them because no one deserves to be hurt on purpose.

 

[TippyThomas]

I'm very happy I live in the middle of nowhere and don't see any of this.

 

[bsmcneil]

Gah, I hope that wasn't Jesus!

All I can think of is "it's easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle" ... "sermon on the mount" ... "greatest commandment" ... like ... the entire underpinning of a religion is "be good to one another" and this just swings and misses.

 

[bsmcneil]

I know if they want money they should work for it and not resort to fraud and scam people for it.
Telling them to get a job is being kind, it gets them off the street, they earn an honest living and it ends up helping the people who are really destitute because people will be more likely to help them because they know they aren't being scammed by a criminal.
So I really don't care what happens to that kind of a person, karma is a B

Karma isn't a B. You clearly don't know what the word means. Karma is the result of any action (good or bad) and the point of karma is actually to disconnect from any of it (not to earn "good" karma). How does telling someone to get a job get someone off the street? If they legitimately need help, do you honestly think that comment is going to solve any problem? If they are "a scammer" they're not going to care about your suggestion. It's fine to be obtuse and obstinate - the world is made up with all sorts of people. But, it is clear that you don't care what happens to some people (may you never experience being in need and facing such judgments) ... and that maybe you're intimately familiar with words that you obliquely reference.

 

[momz]

The other day DH and I were leaving the local shopping center parking lot after doing our grocery shopping. On the curb at the end of the entrance/exit to the shopping center there was a young woman holding a sign begging for money saying she was a mother of two children and couldn’t work.

I found this to be very offensive for this young woman to be begging on the street for money. She was wearing a very nice coat and looked perfectly healthy, had no children with her so she must have had childcare. My thought was that if she was able to be out on the street begging wouldn’t she be better served getting a job? There are help wanted signs all over the place and the pay scale today is much better than it was in years gone by. I just can’t believe the gall of this person to expect people to just handover money to her for no good reason.

On our way past her I mouthed the words “get a job”. I hope she understood what I was saying and hope no one gave her any money.

Good show! That’ll fix her! .

when is the last time you didn’t have the money to pay a bill? When did your kids experience their only meal coming from school?

although, clearly you know all about this woman’s history and personal circumstances.

Such a wonderful example of compassion you are setting for others. I imagine that it never occurred to that woman to get a job. You’re so smart.

 

[Mango7100]

The other day DH and I were leaving the local shopping center parking lot after doing our grocery shopping. On the curb at the end of the entrance/exit to the shopping center there was a young woman holding a sign begging for money saying she was a mother of two children and couldn’t work.

I found this to be very offensive for this young woman to be begging on the street for money. She was wearing a very nice coat and looked perfectly healthy, had no children with her so she must have had childcare. My thought was that if she was able to be out on the street begging wouldn’t she be better served getting a job? There are help wanted signs all over the place and the pay scale today is much better than it was in years gone by. I just can’t believe the gall of this person to expect people to just handover money to her for no good reason.

On our way past her I mouthed the words “get a job”. I hope she understood what I was saying and hope no one gave her any money.

Wow! You could have just passed by. Did you feel good about yourself afterward?

 

[tinkerbellandpeterpan]

I think if she's a scammer then mouthing "get a job" has no effect and if she isn't a scammer then why essentially "kick" someone at what must be one of the lowest points in their lives. How interesting you felt proud enough to post about it online. There but for the grace of God....

 

[anniemae]

I don't give to panhandlers. It's so hard to know who is really in need and who is scamming. They usually hang out by traffic lights so when you are stopped at a red light you are in an uncomfortable spot. I prefer to give money to local charities that help the homeless. I also donate food to our local food bank as well as volunteer at the food bank. It is so heartbreaking and truly a huge problem.

 

[MillauFr]

We have issues in our area with panhandlers and most of the time they are scams. Some are very well known

Agreed. The worst are the billionaire sports team owners who try to panhandle taxpayers for hundreds of millions of dollars. Luckily in Puget Sound we have wised up and tell them to pound sand now days. If the sports team owners want a free meal they can go to a homeless shelter.

 

[Jonfw2]

I love this idea! I trust you wouldn't mind me copying it?

No! You can make like 50 of them for like twenty bucks at Costco.

 

[Minnesota!]

Reposting with some restraint since I was extra snarky this morning..

Ewww.

You can feel how you feel, but to kick someone when they are down - or at least at the point in their life where panhandling is what they resort to - develop some compassion and understanding.

Next time, pass on by. And, pass on the judgement, too. "Get a job" is not that damn easy. No matter what "they" want to say - plenty of people in my life looking, even the places that are "desperate for help" don't hire qualified candidates.

 

[Kimkimba]

We have the fake violinists here - it’s a huge national scam. They haven’t been here during the winter because it’s too cold. I’m guessing they’ll be back from Florida soon.

I’m a very giving person, just not to scam artists.

 

[MillauFr]

You can feel how you feel, but to kick someone when they are down

I'll give you a green light to kick Zigi Wilf when he is down. Why he needed a huge handout from Minnesota taxpayers is beyond me. A true panhandler scammer.

 

[RamblingMad]

Best to not judge others.

 

[TipsyTraveler]

The other day DH and I were leaving the local shopping center parking lot after doing our grocery shopping. On the curb at the end of the entrance/exit to the shopping center there was a young woman holding a sign begging for money saying she was a mother of two children and couldn’t work.

I found this to be very offensive for this young woman to be begging on the street for money. She was wearing a very nice coat and looked perfectly healthy, had no children with her so she must have had childcare. My thought was that if she was able to be out on the street begging wouldn’t she be better served getting a job? There are help wanted signs all over the place and the pay scale today is much better than it was in years gone by. I just can’t believe the gall of this person to expect people to just handover money to her for no good reason.

On our way past her I mouthed the words “get a job”. I hope she understood what I was saying and hope no one gave her any money.

I feel compelled to nitpick a few of these details. Sorry, I can’t help myself.

First, I have to know, what was “very offensive” to you about a stranger panhandling? You write that as though it was somehow a personal attack on you and I’m struggling to understand it.

A friend of mine took her coat off and gave it to a homeless woman a few weeks ago, so somewhere in Phoenix a homeless person is wearing a nice coat and I hope she’s not being judged too harshly for it.

She “looked healthy?” Because all medical conditions are visible to the naked eye? C’mon.

Her kid’s weren’t with her. Okay, maybe they were in school. Maybe they’re old enough to take care of themselves during the day. Maybe they hang out at the playground during the day. I once read someone’s story about growing up homeless where she said her mother would buy her and her sibling dollar-menu meals and leave them in the fast food restaurant for a couple of hours while she went out to beg for money because it was one of the few places where they could get out of the elements and into a/c for a bit. Or, maybe she does have a legitimate childcare situation in place for her kids because she’s trying to give them some form of stability and after paying that expense she doesn’t have enough left over to cover much of anything else.

Having the power to decide not to give her money wasn’t satisfying enough for you; you also hope no one else gives her money either. That just makes you sound vengeful, TBH.

The most surprising part of this whole story is that you saw the woman in the distance and had time to plan your response. As you passed by, you said what you did. Then you went about your day, came home however much time later, sat down and typed out this post and published it to a public forum…. And in all that time, you never stopped to think, “Hm. Maybe that wasn’t my finest moment. I might not want to tell this story after all.” That’s crazy to me.

 

[meggiebeth]

Panhandling and homeless street begging is a normal sight to me and not shocking.

I feel sorry for the genuine homeless over the last 20 years in UK and Ireland. With the rise of the corruption, abuse and professional street beggars, people are too afraid to help a genuine homeless.

One group of professional beggars in Ireland are Romany Gypsies, who started coming to Ireland in large family groups in 1989. They came from Eastern European countries as asylum seekers after the break up of The Soviet Union and the fall of the Berlin Wall. They don't work and get assisted housing and benefits. In Dublin especially they will go to the city centre and sit on a street corner, often times with a child or baby and beg for money. Then in the evening time, get on the bus back to the suburbs and their local authority house. Another trick they do is to send a child aged about 6 years old into restaurants or cafes to go table to table begging, while the adult waits outside.

Another type of professional street beggars are the drug addicts and alcoholics, who again get assisted housing and benefits. Like the Romany Gypsies, they will spend the day sitting on a street corner begging and then in the evening time go back to their local authority house.

The Big Issue newspaper is a project that was originally set up for genuine homeless people, as a way for them to sell something and make some money instead of just panhandling. However over the years, they company has gone far from its original idea and people who are not homeless such as the Romany Gypsies and drug addicts and alcoholics who live in local authority housing sell it. Very few people buy The Big Issue newspaper now, because its not just genuine homeless people selling it.

There are many genuine homeless people on the streets in Dublin and other towns and citys. There are various charity's who go out and give them food and hot drinks, but they only go out around 10pm, because they know that all the not genuine homeless street beggars will have gone home to their houses by that time.

It is definitely getting worse in the UK. I live in a relatively rural agricultural area and just recently, a homeless person was begging for money in our village. Our nearby small town also has homeless and people begging. It’s hard to tell for sure who is genuine and who isn’t.

That said, I have never seen the amount of homeless and people begging here as I have in the US when on holiday. In some (rather affluent) towns and cities, there were homeless begging on every street corner in the US - far more than I’ve ever seen in London.

 

[Sinder]

Karma isn't a B. You clearly don't know what the word means. Karma is the result of any action (good or bad) and the point of karma is actually to disconnect from any of it (not to earn "good" karma). How does telling someone to get a job get someone off the street? If they legitimately need help, do you honestly think that comment is going to solve any problem? If they are "a scammer" they're not going to care about your suggestion. It's fine to be obtuse and obstinate - the world is made up with all sorts of people. But, it is clear that you don't care what happens to some people (may you never experience being in need and facing such judgments) ... and that maybe you're intimately familiar with words that you obliquely reference.

You obviously haven’t been following the conversation I’ve been having. If you did you would have known that I was speaking about the scammers, you know the frauds who aren’t actually in need. And yes Karma is a B and maybe they’ll find that after scamming people for money they may find themselves actually needing help for real and nobody will be willing to give it to them.
That would be sweet poetic justice as far as I’m concerned.