WalkingintheFog
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Nov 1, 2008
- Messages
- 1,129
This is a great thread.
These are things you do with no ulterior motive, and things you tell others just to inspire others to do the same.
I know the people aren't always going to act or say or think the way we wish they would, and that sometimes a ROAK actually can get a bad response (we're taught to be polite and give up bus seat & to hold a door open for the next person, but that person resent what he/she sees as an implication of be weak or "so old".... how would you know?) I also think that RAK by guys can be misinterpreted-- but then like pp Kickapoo wrote, there are acts that actually have ulterior motives (guy bought her a coffee, hit on her later).... that would make you more suspicious/careful.....
But I want to keep thinking that the more I can do, the more people will notice and decide to do the same.
Here are a few of mine:
--Christmas time I was leaving Walmart, there was a couple outside with the store clerk, they had bought a new TV (the old fat ones: big are now cheap) and were trying to get it in the car, but it wasn't fitting. I asked where they lived, and then offered to take the husband and TV in my station wagon.
(I'm female and it was a pink station wagon, they could tell I was no threat to anyone!). They lived in a low income area (this is NL, there aren't "unsafe" neighbourhoods here), but the wife tried to give me some $$ and I told her no, but if she liked, she could put that in the Salvation Army kettle or to the local food bank.
--I always have 2 containers of Windshield Washer Fluid in my trunk (1 full, 1 1/4 full). This Christmas I was leaving the parking lot of Zellers and noticed a man in an old truck getting handfuls of snow to clean the windshield. I changed my direction and put the car in park, told my sister I'd be right back, hopped out, got the 1/4 full one and dodged across and handed it to the man and said, just a small help from Santa and ran back to the car... I've also stopped on the highway to pass over another 1/4 full container to a young couple doing the same snow-scrub.
--Christmas eve I was running here and there with a sister who was home for Christmas. It was getting late, we were hungry, and realized a Submarine shop was still open. There were young clerks in there, and as we waited for the subs and chat, we learned the girl was sad about having to work, she was low in senority so didn't get to pick her shifts, and that meant she didn't get to go home for Christmas. But she said, as long as more nice people like ye come in, it's easier. We got our subs and started to leave, but as we did so, I passed them a Movie pass card each..$10 &$15 (I had purchased extra for nieces/nephews/emergencies/myself).
--If I'm driving anywhere near the University on a rainy day and see "knapsacks", I always stop to offer a ride---I remember rainy walks in my University days and wishing somebody would give me a lift.
--One day last spring, I passed an older lady (60+) approaching a flooded section of road (just 5" cold water), and turned my car around and asked if I could drive her, she said she was only going to the bus stop on the other side, but that far would be great. In the brief moment we chatted, I knew I was headed in the approx same direction as her ultimate destination, and her bus trip would be 40mins, with transfers, so I offered to take her the whole way as I was going right past that street anyway. She was there in 5 mins.
--When one sister got married and had her reception in a Mess Hall, I went back to the kitchen after the meal to say thank you to all the servers and kitchen staff... another sister was just entering thru the other side for the same reason, and to offer them wedding cake ..they asked if how many sisters are there? The other 3 sisters (and parents) had already stopped in! (When we shared that story the next day at my folks, I could tell my dad was pretty pleased). I just took as granted I should thank them for their efforts, but apparently not a lot of people go to the kitchen staff. So perhaps that does qualify as a RAK?
I realize this behaviour is something my parents have quietly taught me by example. I was in Brownies as a little girl, and my six was the Elves. Our little song we sang each evening was " This is what we do as Elves,
Think of others not ourselves" Over 30 years later and that little rhyme is still in my head!
These are things you do with no ulterior motive, and things you tell others just to inspire others to do the same.
I know the people aren't always going to act or say or think the way we wish they would, and that sometimes a ROAK actually can get a bad response (we're taught to be polite and give up bus seat & to hold a door open for the next person, but that person resent what he/she sees as an implication of be weak or "so old".... how would you know?) I also think that RAK by guys can be misinterpreted-- but then like pp Kickapoo wrote, there are acts that actually have ulterior motives (guy bought her a coffee, hit on her later).... that would make you more suspicious/careful.....
But I want to keep thinking that the more I can do, the more people will notice and decide to do the same.
Here are a few of mine:
--Christmas time I was leaving Walmart, there was a couple outside with the store clerk, they had bought a new TV (the old fat ones: big are now cheap) and were trying to get it in the car, but it wasn't fitting. I asked where they lived, and then offered to take the husband and TV in my station wagon.
(I'm female and it was a pink station wagon, they could tell I was no threat to anyone!). They lived in a low income area (this is NL, there aren't "unsafe" neighbourhoods here), but the wife tried to give me some $$ and I told her no, but if she liked, she could put that in the Salvation Army kettle or to the local food bank.
--I always have 2 containers of Windshield Washer Fluid in my trunk (1 full, 1 1/4 full). This Christmas I was leaving the parking lot of Zellers and noticed a man in an old truck getting handfuls of snow to clean the windshield. I changed my direction and put the car in park, told my sister I'd be right back, hopped out, got the 1/4 full one and dodged across and handed it to the man and said, just a small help from Santa and ran back to the car... I've also stopped on the highway to pass over another 1/4 full container to a young couple doing the same snow-scrub.
--Christmas eve I was running here and there with a sister who was home for Christmas. It was getting late, we were hungry, and realized a Submarine shop was still open. There were young clerks in there, and as we waited for the subs and chat, we learned the girl was sad about having to work, she was low in senority so didn't get to pick her shifts, and that meant she didn't get to go home for Christmas. But she said, as long as more nice people like ye come in, it's easier. We got our subs and started to leave, but as we did so, I passed them a Movie pass card each..$10 &$15 (I had purchased extra for nieces/nephews/emergencies/myself).
--If I'm driving anywhere near the University on a rainy day and see "knapsacks", I always stop to offer a ride---I remember rainy walks in my University days and wishing somebody would give me a lift.
--One day last spring, I passed an older lady (60+) approaching a flooded section of road (just 5" cold water), and turned my car around and asked if I could drive her, she said she was only going to the bus stop on the other side, but that far would be great. In the brief moment we chatted, I knew I was headed in the approx same direction as her ultimate destination, and her bus trip would be 40mins, with transfers, so I offered to take her the whole way as I was going right past that street anyway. She was there in 5 mins.
--When one sister got married and had her reception in a Mess Hall, I went back to the kitchen after the meal to say thank you to all the servers and kitchen staff... another sister was just entering thru the other side for the same reason, and to offer them wedding cake ..they asked if how many sisters are there? The other 3 sisters (and parents) had already stopped in! (When we shared that story the next day at my folks, I could tell my dad was pretty pleased). I just took as granted I should thank them for their efforts, but apparently not a lot of people go to the kitchen staff. So perhaps that does qualify as a RAK?
I realize this behaviour is something my parents have quietly taught me by example. I was in Brownies as a little girl, and my six was the Elves. Our little song we sang each evening was " This is what we do as Elves,
Think of others not ourselves" Over 30 years later and that little rhyme is still in my head!
