OT: For Anyone With Children In Daycare...

[Luv'sTink]

I watch my niece who is 1.5 years old for my nephew, here is my question.....
How sick is to sick to send your child to daycare? Meaning by the daycare standards.

I don't really mind her having a cold but when she is hacking and coughing, running a fever, is lethargic, can't breathe and is clinging and doesn't want to be put down or eat, I think they should keep her home. Heck how many of us like it when our own children are this sick?!?


I feel like the take advantage of me because I am family. They bring her and cold medicine for me to give her (that isn't the problem) so she can get some relief. I feel at this point she needs to be home with her parents. I have a son and I don't need him sick too. I feel guilty about wanting them to stay home from work. One time in the year and a half I have watched her they kept her home but only because the other sides Grandma was going to watch her anyway and she just happen to be really sick on that day. I know people have family watch their kids when they are sick and can't go to daycare but they both have vacation and sick leave but don't want to use it.

My DH says he is getting tired of getting sick from her all the time(he has a low tolerance). Our DS is rarely sick, but he has state testing next week and this week he is home on spring break, wouldn't you know it!

 

[AngieWin]

With a fever they should be home. Unless it is from teething (which at 1.5 that shouldnt be the case) they shouldnt be anywhere but home.

 

[flipflop]

One of our family members watchers our trio out of her home. If the kids have a cold or low grade fever (might be teething, might be an off day, don't act miserably sick) she takes them. If they have a higher fever, respiratory infection, stomache virus, etc she does not. If they have been diagnosed with an ear infection or something else that can be treated with antibiotics, she will take them on antibiotics. She is more lenient than a daycare center (which I don't think we take kids that are showing symptoms of sickness, period) but we don't take advantage of her. Of course, she also gives my "wheezer" his breathing treatments when necessary - but that is only after he has been diagnosed and is not contagious (if the wheezing is caused by sickness rather than allergies).

Dh and I both work full time both in professions that don't take kindly to us taking days off for sick kids. However, when our kids are sick, they are sick and we have to stay home. That's one of our many jobs as parents and the powers that be just have to deal.

 

[Luv'sTink]

With a fever they should be home. Unless it is from teething (which at 1.5 that shouldnt be the case) they shouldnt be anywhere but home.

She has 8 teeth upper and lower (16) and she was here through the fever and runny nose of teething, that didn't bother me at all, no one can "catch" teething...LOL

 

[jcc0621]

My DS is in daycare and the schools policy is this:
Fever - NO. MUST be fever free for 24 hours before being able to return.

Vomitting/Diaherea (sp?) - CAn return 24 hours after symptoms have stopped

Lice or Pink Eye can return right after 1st treatment with prescription and not from doctor.

It drives me crazy becasue I can't tell you how many kids I have seen brought to school with same symptoms you have described. I wouldn't expose your child to that, so please don't expose mine to them

Hope this helps!
Janet

 

[labdogs42]

My DS is in daycare and the schools policy is this:
Fever - NO. MUST be fever free for 24 hours before being able to return.

Vomitting/Diaherea (sp?) - CAn return 24 hours after symptoms have stopped

Lice or Pink Eye can return right after 1st treatment with prescription and not from doctor.

My daycare has the same rules and you can return after 24 hours on antibiotics if kid has something like strep throat.

 

[Tommys Mommy]

MY DD & DS have both been in home-based daycares, church-run daycares and now a daycare center; all of the "rules" that were stated by the previous 2 posters are the same for our caregivers. Your niece should not be left in your care with the symptoms you described.

 

[design_mom]

Our daycare gets a little more specific with the "rules":
-- Cannot attend with a fever greater than 101. Cannot return until they've been fever-free for 24 hours.
-- Cannot attend if they've had three or more diarrhea episodes within 24 hours. Cannot return until they've been symptom-free for 24 hours.
-- I think vomiting is a one-strike and you're out thing -- again, 24 hours symptom-free before you can return.
-- With any other communicable issue (strep throat, pink eye, etc.) it's 24 hours after the first does of antibiotics or with a doctors note. Chicken pox, hand-foot-mouth, etc also have specific rules...but I can't remember them exactly.

A cough and runny nose alone don't preclude attendance.


I think you should discuss the issue with your nephew and come up with some health rules. If he's never had his daughter in daycare before he might not have thought about it really. But I don't think you're expecting too much for them to stay home if she's really sick.

 

[krystalleigh1]

I run a home daycare. Here's my policy:

Sicknesses
If your child is sick please do not bring them to daycare. If your child comes to daycare sick or becomes sick while in daycare I will do everything I can to keep them comfortable until you arrive to pick them up. They will be isolated from the other children as much as possible until you arrive. Parents will be notified and required to pick up the child immediately if a child exhibits any of the following symptoms: (not limited to just these symptoms, it is in my discretion weather or not the child will be sent home)

Fever over 100 degrees
Diarrhea- two or more loose bowel movements within one hour, or very watery bm
Severe coughing
Difficult or rapid breathing
Unusual spots or rashes
Vomiting
Jaundice
Difficulty swallowing
Thick green or yellow discharge from nose or eyes (infection)

Your child may attend daycare if they have mild cold symptoms. They should still be able to participate in normal daily daycare activities.

If your child is sent home because of sickness they will not be allowed to return to my care the following day. They must also remain at home for 24 hours after their symptoms have disappeared without the use of medication. Medication will only mask symptoms, but children can still be very contagious even without symptoms. You may also be required to bring a note from your doctor stating that your child is not contagious.

It is very important that you do not bring your child to daycare if they are sick. I know that you would not like your child exposed to other sick kids, so please do not expose your sick child to healthy kids in daycare. Viruses will spread very quickly between kids. Viruses also affect each child differently. A virus that may give one child only a little diarrhea may give another child severe diarrhea and vomiting.

In the event that your child is sick while in my care you will be required to pick them up ASAP. If the child is not picked up in 30 minutes you will pay a $1 fee for every minute after 30 minutes you are late (no exceptions). If I cannot reach you I will call your emergency contact to pick up your child. Bringing a sick child to daycare may be grounds for immediate termination.

For me one of the things I tell parents at interviews is, "If you don't remember anything else about my policies, please remember this." I also send out yearly reminders about my sickness policy.

Good Luck!

 

[Nanisashi]

It doesn't sound like they are too considerate, either to you or to their own baby. When our kids are really sick my husband and I take turns staying home with them. When they are just sick enough not to go to daycare, we take them to our back up lady, who knows beforehand that she is going to have a kind of sick kid in her hands. On these occasions we also pay her extra because she is having to be more of a nurse than a babysitter.

 

[janets]

Most daycare facilities have strict "sick child" policies. Mine are the same as mentioned above...certain level of fever, symptoms, etc. They cannot come back the very next day. They must be fever free or symptom free for 24 hours. Must be on antibiotics (for strep or other) for 24 hours. Colds/coughs are a normal course of a kid's life so those are allowed.

I think you need to sit your nephew down and discuss these situations. When a family member watches a child, sometimes the family forgets that they are providing a service and to bring a sick child to a daycare provider (any type) is not the right thing to do. I'm fortunate that I have my mom very close by to cover in the event one of my kids gets sick (both dh and I work FT) but if needed (like when she's away on vacation) if they get sick, either dh or I are staying home.

Good luck.

 

[Mkrop]

For years my mom was my babysitter while I worked, I never took my child there if he was knowingly sick. High fever, throwing up, etc. That child needed me and I certainly did not want my mom getting sick, first because it is the considerate thing to do, and second if she got sick, she would not be able to watch him and we would just wind up in a cycle and I would never get back to work.

That is not to say that I did not bring him over by mistake. Thought it was a cold and turned into something worse as the day progressed. She would call and I would go get him. She was good about giving him medicines for a cold or antibiotics once he had been to the Drs but ultimately he is my responsibility.

I think you need to talk with parents and set some ground rules. Explain that this is what you will accept but more sick than that they will have to make other arrangements (lets hope it is them staying home!) You are put you, your child and your husband at ridk and that is not fair.

 

[tadamom]

I know just how you feel!!

I keep my niece 2 days a week and she goes to daycare the other 3 days. I also have 2 kids of my own (a 5 yr. old that is in 3 day preschool and a 2 yr. old). My SIL will bring her DD no matter what is wrong with her and I won't even find out until later (and it's too late) that something is wrong with her or has been wrong with her. Drives me nuts!! Every time she is here, her nose is running. They blame it on allergies or teething. You can't blame everything on these 2 things. I am forever wiping her nose throughout the day - it's disgusting!! There have been times when I heard from my MIL that my niece was sick (w/a stomach bug) and I have had to call my SIL and ask about it - then tell her that the child can't come.

I know the sickness thing is a gripe of mine but the other is that she doesn't get picked up at a descent time! There are some days that she is here until after 7 pm. At daycare she has to be picked up by 6 pm or they are charged. I don't get that luxury. Some days my SIL doesn't drop her off until nearly 9:30 am. I actually like that part some days but I don't like her being here until 7 pm. I also don't get paid as much as the daycare. I make less and that's fine but pick her up at a descent hour!!!

Sorry to hijack your thread but I had to get that off my chest!! I could never tell SIL about some of these things - I'm too chicken!! Also, they are paying for a HUGE chunk of our room in Disney World, so I guess I shouldn't bite the hand that is sheltering me on my vacation!!

 

[chrismom2005]

i'd never take my ds to daycare when was sick he belonged at home in bed how fair is it to the child to make them get up get dressed and drive to someones house when they are sick.

 

[Mkrop]

I guess I learned from my mom's babysitting mistakes when I was a kid.

When I was younger, she would take babysitting jobs to make extra money. Only one kid at a time. Well one lady was so rude. she would bring her kid over when he was sick. Then the rest of us would wind up getting it. then she was always late picking him up and she would just laugh and smile and say she had an important meeting. She would not come for him until after 7 when she was suppose to get him at 5:30. Then she would demand that my mom give him a bath and have him in his pjs if she was running late so she could put him right to bed(hello did you ever spend any time with him)

So finally my mom had enough and freaked out on her one night when she was late and the woman turned to her and said "you are a SAHM lwhat could you possibly need to do that is more important than my work" Well my mother cursed this woman and ripped her(totally unlike my very reilgious mother) a new one while she proceeded to pack up Jr's belongings and told her to never come back to her home. Well then the lady started crying but she had gone to far.

So I swore when my mom started watching my kid that if I could help it, I would be on time and not dump her with a sick kid ever!

 

[Luv Bunnies]

I work in a special needs preschool class. It's surprising how many parents send their kids to school sick and then claim they "didn't know he was sick!" (do they look at their kids in the morning?) Or that they "didn't know the policy" when we've sent it home to every family at least 3 times this year.

Basically, if a child has a fever, he should stay home. He can't return until he is fever-free for at least 24 hours. If his temp was up the night before but normal in the morning, he should still stay home (it hasn't been 24 hours yet).

If the child is coughing a lot, he should stay home. A little residual cough after a cold is to be expected. But, constant coughing to the point of gagging is a reason to stay home. Last week we had a child gag from coughing and threw up on the bus. The bus driver turned around and took him home and the mom couldn't understand why! She told the driver there were extra clothes in his backpack. This kid is in a special ed preschool class in a public school. The school rules for sick kids apply to him too. The mom called us and expressed her surprise that the driver brought him home and was put out that she would have to miss work! All because the driver wouldn't deliver us a kid covered in puke! That same day, another little girl coughed so hard that she threw up in front of her circle-time chair. Luckily, it was dismissal time and grandma was just outside the door.

If the child's nose is running green or yellow, he should stay home. We don't mind wiping the occasional runny nose if it's running clear. But green or yellow indicate an infection (usually viral but still contagious). The kid needs a couple of days at home to feel better and ensure no one else will be infected. The other problem is that these kids haven't developed their self-help skills yet. They wipe with sleeves, on toys or not at all and spread it around.

If a child has thrown up or had a bout of diarehhea less than 24 hours ago, he should stay home. If the last episode was 24 or more hours ago and he has no other symptoms, he can come to school.

If he's been diagnosed with pink eye, he should be receiving the medication and the eye should be free of discharge. We had a kid with pink eye last week. After 2 doses of meds, his mom said his eye was still crusty. We asked her to keep him home another day until the eye was clear. Pink is OK but oozing and crusty can still be contagious.

If a kid has a rash, he should stay home until it's diagnosed and treated. We had an autistic boy rubbing his back on the carpet one day. He's non-verbal and couldn't tell us what the problem was. When we checked under his shirt, he was covered with red dots. His mom said she noticed it in the morning but thought his skin was just irritated from her new laundry soap. Turned out he'd developed a food allergy that needed to be treated. So, don't send rashy or otherwise itchy kids to school or daycare! Do you know what it's like trying to deal with an autistic kid who's so uncomfortable? They get really cranky! (That's probably why his mom sent him to us - she has a history of similar situations.) That same day, she said she would "try to come and get him early but the baby was sleeping so she couldn't come right away." What's wrong with putting the baby in his car seat and letting him sleep in the car? If his nap is cut short and mom doesn't get her "alone time" for the day, tough! She's a parent and her older kid is sick at school. She needs to put on her big girl panties and deal with the fact that her day might just be interrupted without prior notice! (I could go on and on about this mom, but that wouldn't be polite!)

If kids have open sores that can't be covered by bandaids, they should stay home. We had a kid with cold sores under his nose that were oozing. We called grandma and asked her to pick him up. Turned out he had Impetigo - a skin infection that often occurs on the face during a cold. All the nose wiping can cause the skin to break and be subject to infection. Little kids carry all kind of stuff under their fingernails.

I hope I haven't forgotten anything. As you might be able to tell, sick kids at school and daycare if a real hot button for me. I get so irritated when I see a miserable, droopy kid get off the bus. You can also tell something's up when a mom or dad shoves the kid through the door and makes a quick exit. By the time we notice something's wrong with the kid, the parent is long gone. I can't count the number of times we've set up the sleeping bag in the corner for a sick kid to rest while mom was "on her way" to get him. These kids certainly can't learn anything when they're sick. Some don't have any language to express themselves so they just cry. That really disrupts the class because the other kids are so distractable. They're all watching the one who's upset and can't do their work. Some of our kids are anxious and can't stand seeing another kid so upset. So they get upset, too. Then the teachers get anxious. Then the classroom is basically frozen until the sick one goes home.

To the OP, I would try to be firm with your nephew. Just because you're family doesn't mean you shouldn't get some consideration. The fact that you have two little kids of your own and a husband who seems to catch every bug that comes along should be a clue to the parents that they shouldn't bring a sick child to your house. Good luck!

 

[Luv'sTink]

Thanks for the replies everyone!

They are not good about dropping off or picking up either!

I have her 10+ hours a day so they think she is just as comfortable with me as with them. I think it is just easier for THEM to let me deal with it.

I know I am now getting her crud and I think maybe I should tell them I can't sit for them and maybe it will help them realize that it can be a double edge sword.....bring her to me when she is sick and I will get sick and they will still have to miss work! Usually I still watch her and deal with it like I do for my own. Actually they will get one of the Grandmas to watch her.

The funny part is when the Mom or Dad is sick they still brings the child to me so they don't have to deal with her!

 

[delilah]

I wonder where Luv Bunnies got her medical degree, and why she is working as a preschool teacher instead of practicing medicine. After all, when I attended medical school, I ended up with $50,000 in student loan debt, and needed to work in my own field to make my loan payments.

As any second year medical student can tell you, people frequently will have a yellowish or greenish discharge with a viral URI (a "cold", in layman's terms). It doesn't need an antibiotic, and it doesn't necessarily mean that the child can't be at school or an adult at work. That's a very large problem in medicine today: people demand that their child with a viral infection be treated with antibiotics, which leads to problems like antibiotic resistance and difficulty in treating life threatening infections. Clear nasal drainage is equally contagious, and keeping children home when they have any chance at all of spreading a viral uri would use all their parent's PTO before January of any given school year (the average child has 6 colds a year, and the average cold lasts 7-10 day, and the average parent has maybe 15-20 days PTO per year). Additionally, viral infections are contagious even before the patient shows symptoms in many cases, and children can continue to shed virus (ie, contagious) for several wks following. Examples are influenza and viral gastroenteritis.

So, I agree that a fever is a reason to keep a child out of school, as is diarrhea and vomiting. A child that is too lethargic to concentrate should stay home. Kids with diseases like strept throat, chickenpox, pinkeye, etc, have guidlines for when kids can return. However, most pinkeye is viral, and extremely contagious, and not affected one iota by antibiotic drops. But, once one kid get it in a class, it spreads like wildfire, and soon every one has it. But, almost universally, schools will allow kids to return after 24 hours on eyedrops, which is totally illogical in my opinion.

 

[chrismom2005]

However, most pinkeye is viral, and extremely contagious, and not affected one iota by antibiotic drops. But, once one kid get it in a class, it spreads like wildfire, and soon every one has it. But, almost universally, schools will allow kids to return after 24 hours on eyedrops, which is totally illogical in my opinion.

then why do doctors say that after 24 on antibiotics it isnt contagious anymore

 

[NU2WDW]

They are not good about dropping off or picking up either!

I have her 10+ hours a day so they think she is just as comfortable with me as with them. I think it is just easier for THEM to let me deal with it.

....

The funny part is when the Mom or Dad is sick they still brings the child to me so they don't have to deal with her!

What selfish, self-centered people you're related to! Remind them of all this when their child is a teenager and they moan about how "uncontrollable" she is.