Okay, is delivering a baby really scary?

[mtemm]

I never got the chance to deliver naturally. Unfortunately the first time my son wasn't responding to labor well and I had a section, second time I wanted to VBAC but both babies (twins) were breech, so another section.

I will say that other than some personal disappointment, my sections weren't all that bad. I never needed anything stronger than extra strength motrin for pain, my milk came in the second day, and because I wasn't doped up I could be up and moving easily and could care for my baby. Not that there wasn't some discomfort, of course, but overall nope.

 

[theSurlyMermaid]

Missypie, that's an extremely interesting point you brought up in your post re: Pitocin. My colleague who just delivered was induced as well. I never thought about Pitocin-induced labor pains being worse than regular ones.

I hope I'm like my mom: nothing really fazes her. She had three kids and her overall description was "not bad at all".

I have, as I said earlier, had a kidney stone get caught in a much smaller tube. I have nevr felt more pain in my life, but the nurses were all, "Hey, look at the bright side, you can probably handle labor!" All I could think was, at least labor has a wonderful gift at the end!!!

 

[missypie]

If I were you, I would never agree to a Pitocin induction for anyone's (yours or the doctor's) convenience. But you will receive varying comments on Pitocin and here is why: I was just BARELY dialated when the doc induced me (I was 11 days late and he was about to do a 3rd scheduled c-section, but he knew how much I wanted to try to deliver.) So with me it took 4 hours of major Pitocin contractions before I could have an epidural. Other ladies are dialated enough as soon as the Pitocin starts to get the epidural. Those are the ladies who say "It's the way to go; didn't feel a thing!"

If you read about labor, you will learn about the value of moving around, walking, showering, bathing, rocking in a rocking chair, etc. for pain ("discomfort") control. With Pitocin, you're bound to the bed, so you can't use those coping strategies. (If you plan natural childbirth, abandon the plan if you end up with Pitocin.) I couldn't even move from side to side or sit up, because when I did, Baby's heart rate went down.

Before I was induced, I had about 26 hours of pretty heavy contractions about 6 minutes apart. With each one, I would walk walk walk walk walk and it really made things more bearable. But once I was bound to the bed and I couldn't engage in any of the physical coping techniques, it got intense. (As for the psychological coping techniques...sorry, but imagining that I was a ripe peach or a blooming flower didn't do it for me!)

 

[4greatboys]

Yes labor and childbirth is painful but they also have drugs to help you through if you need them. I had 2 with an epidural and 2 without and I can say I liked with better.

 

[my3kids]

I really didn't think it was that bad. Before I get flames, I should say it wasn't bad for me. First one was less than 2 hours, no medication. Went on a walk to the grocery store with the stroller the day I came home from the hospital.

I am a chicken. I take Advil and put myself to bed if I burn my finger while burning, I mean cooking, dinner. There's no one who can expect more sympathy for a stubbed toe than me, except maybe my daughter.....well definitely me daughter, but clearly she comes by that naturally!

Some people have horror stories, some people sail right through. You won't know which group you're in until you get there....but once you get to the finish line, the prize is so great, you don't mind those last painful steps.

 

[Beth E. (NJ)]

I remember my husband saying that he didn't think we should use any pain medication during labor and delivery. I told him that when he delivers a baby he can do it any way he wants to, but when the baby is coming out of me there will be medication involved!

 

[Kermit]

Yes, contractions are painful for most people. But it's pain with a purpose and an end. With something like a migraine, you never know when the pain will end. At least with childbirth you know that a baby will come out sometime relatively soon, and then the pain will be over (mostly, any lingering pain is extremely mild).

I don't think anyone has mentioned this yet, but you also need to consider that you're a little "out of it" when you're in labor, which helps. Even if you aren't medicated, you're going to feel a bit loopy. It would probably be harder to bear if you were completely in your right mind, but you just won't be. You'll have a hard time focusing, and that's good.

 

[skuttle]

I had a great delivery. My water broke four weeks before DS's due date...I had had contractions and didn't even know it at first. After we arrived at the hospital, right before I got my epidural, the pain of the contractions was really bad. But after the epidural, I didn't feel a thing except pressure when he was actually coming out. I pushed from 11-12, went to the delivery room (had to go there since DS was so early), and DS was born at 12:42.

 

[tiggersmom2]

Well, I have had two sons and my experience was great. I was induced with both of them and I also had an epidural with both. My deliveries were smooth as butter! I had one son in four hours and the other in two hours! All I felt was a slight cramping, I guess I was just made to have babies

 

[legs22]

The pain of childbirth is worse than you could ever imagine!!! It was horrific and I wanted to just give up. This was because I was brainwashed by LaMaze classes. "You can do it without an epidural and pain meds. Those aren't good for the baby. Just visualize a pleasant scene or experience" Oh BS! When I told people I wasn't having an epidural they looked at me like I was nuts. And you know what....I was. I had absolutely nothing. No epidural. No pain meds. And it was hell. I would never do that again.
Just get the epidural and pain meds and you will be good to go

 

[slo]

I delivered both of my girls totally natural.

DD#1 - I was in labor exactly 12 hrs. She was 6lbs 15oz and 19 1/4" long
DD#2 - I was in labor exactly 4 hrs. She was 6lbs 14oz and 20" long.

As odd as it my seem, I enjoyed my first labor more than my second labor because the pain progressed slower so I could adjust. The second labor was just pain from the word go.
Would I go through this again? Absolutly!!!!! I loved each of my daughters births and the pain ends practically immediately after the baby is delivered (at least for me it did). I was more nervous about when I would go into labor - than the labor. Don't be nervous - you get the most beautiful gift in the end - your child

 

[Lynn CC]

I went to LaMaze and didn't take any kind of medication. I went Natural. They say it is much healthier for the baby.
I only have one DS(he's 17)
I promised myself right after I had him I would never do that again, (I was talking to myself in the shower) and I made myself promise myself never to bread my promise LOL....it sounds rediculous.
I was never brave enough to do that again!
Everyone is different though, so I guess you'll just have to experience it for yourself.
I'm glad I have DS ...he was worth the pain

 

[Idaho]

I have had 2 kids and am expecting our third, (one with an epidural and one with an epidural that didn't work). I have decided to have this one without anything because of the problems I had with the epidural that didn't work. (That is, IF I follow my previous pattern of short labors. Never say never, you know.) Anyway, I saw in your post that you have had kidney stones. I have also had kidney stones a couple of times and I think that they are worse than labor. I have several reasons for this.
First, you are at least semi-mentally prepared for the pain of having a baby because after you have been pregnant for 9 LONG months, you are SOOOO ready to have that baby out of there that you are willing to be dragged behind a bus just to not be pregnant anymore! And you know from the start that the pain is at the end. With kidney stones, they just hit you out of the blue like a bomb.
Second, kidney stones are one long continuous pain, whereas you get little breaks with labor.
Third, you never know how long kidney stones are going to plague you, but you know that labor can't go on forever.
And fourth, you get something you really wanted out of having a baby. It is the big prize. With kidney stones, you just get relief from the pain and a fear of the next attack!
Just remember that the pain medications are usually great, your husband is there to cheer you on, and it is very exciting. (Kidney stones are NOT exciting and no one is cheering you on because there is "nothing in it for them" so to speak.)

 

[Planogirl]

I had an epidural and I'm so glad that I did. The pain from labor wasn't too bad before the epidural so I don't how bad it would have gotten. However, I had an enormous amount of pain once the epidural wore off so I'm glad that I had that break.

As for fear, yes it is very scary but mostly because it's an unknown. Once it's happening, you're generally too busy to worry about the fear any more.

 

[theSurlyMermaid]

Wow, keep these stories coming! I'm so glad I started this thread, this is all very interesting to me!

Kudos to whoever said you are also pretty out of it, which makes the pain a bit easier to bear....I hadn't thought of that either. But I'm sure you're right!

ETA: Idaho, I didn't see your post when I posted this....but I have to respond to a fellow kidney stone sufferer!! I agree 100% with everything you said. I have had two experiences with stones, the first was horrible and pain unlike anything I've ever felt (they had to knock me out to remove it ) The second must have been small, it progressed through the tube leading to the bladder and was just solid discomfort (until they gave me the Demerol). The worst thing was the second one actually was like a labor...it was 12 hours of waiting for something to come out, but there was nothing wonderful like a child at the end of it....just a paper funnel and instructions to drink water like there was no tomorrow

 

[SpecialK]

Everyone's experience is different. My sister, the size 4 with no hips, delivered 3 with no drugs. I expected a similar experience - was I wrong! My first was a C-section after 18 hours of induced labor. I was two weeks late, not dilated at all and induced with pitocin. The pitocin was hell for me though I have friends who loved it. You never know. My 2nd was a scheduled C-section. Never took more than Motrin for recovery.

The scariest part is not knowing what is happening or what to expect. The drugs are there to help you so don't let anyone talk you out of them. It's one day in your life. You'll get through it fine.

 

[KimR]

I guess I'm weird because I've had 3 children and all three were very easy births with no significant pain (I had an epidural with all 3). I can honestly say I enjoyed every minute of labor (I've never heard another woman say that!). The epidural worked wonders for me...I was able to feel the contractions, but they were not painful at all. Now, afterwards was another story altogether...but the first 2 times was much worse than the 3rd. Don't let the horror stories scare you - everyone is different!

 

[luv2nascar]

yes it hurts as bad as you can imagine
for some worse than that and for others not at all
but you forget it all when you hold that sweet little precious baby in your arms

you'll know when the time is right

 

[snoopy]

Everyone's experience is different. My sister, the size 4 with no hips, delivered 3 with no drugs. I expected a similar experience - was I wrong! My first was a C-section after 18 hours of induced labor. I was two weeks late, not dilated at all and induced with pitocin. The pitocin was hell for me though I have friends who loved it. You never know. My 2nd was a scheduled C-section. Never took more than Motrin for recovery.

The scariest part is not knowing what is happening or what to expect. The drugs are there to help you so don't let anyone talk you out of them. It's one day in your life. You'll get through it fine.

This was my scenario too. Pitocin is often the subject of my nightmares, to this day. Truly the worst pain I have ever experienced -- and I've had kidney stones, broken bones, was in a pretty serious car wreck. None come close to the pain I was in when my labor was induced. It didn't work, so I ended up having a c-section, much to my relief. I have no regrets.

Second time around the doctor asked if I wanted to try a VBAC, I think I laughed in his face and told him to get out his calendar because we'd be scheduling a c-section.

 

[Idaho]

Surly, I don't want to make this into a kidney stone thread, but I do have to say I smiled about your comment of a paper funnel and instructions to drink water. TOTALLY TRUE!! The second bout I had lasted off and on for 5 days and they had to knock me out to remove it also. If I had to choose between the two, I would totally choose labor. At least I "wanted" that to happen. My sister wouldn't agree with me because she was exhausted by the time she finally got her epidural with her ds and she has had kidney stones a lot (we have a family history of them). She told me it was because of the breaks in contractions that made it hard for her because she was never able to "get used to" the pain. Personally, I was thrilled for the contraction breaks. And like many other have stated, the fear of it starting is worse than it happening because there is always that underlying excitement that the "big moment" has arrived and you are soon going to have a brand new baby.