OH NO!! My son got accepted to a gifted program...no vacation for us!!

[TupperMom7]

I think I would look into how this will benefit your Ds. How old is he? I mean being a normal kid in the summer has it's benefits too. Fresh air, exercise, friendships, etc. He isn't an adult yet - let him be a kid

 

[dis-happy]

FWIW, my dd just graduated from high school and is going to her first choice college, having been accepted via early decision. She's never taken an AP class, has been homeschooled all her life. Kids need time to think and explore; we've done a lot of travelling over the years. A child who is gifted will remain so all of his/her life and scholastic career, there's no need to rush at age 8. Probably the best thing parents can do for academics is to turn off the tv and gameboy.

 

[IDoDis]

My DD was tested and placed in the gifted program when she was 7 years old. Since then, I've learned a lot about gifted children, including the myths -- one of those being that gifted children need constant demands to live up to their potential if they are to achieve. That is so not true. Also, giftedness isn't usually global, but may be focused in one or two areas. My DD is considered highly gifted in verbal communication which really comes out in her writing. While she's still pretty smart in math, she is not gifted in that area. To force that subject upon her at a fast pace could cause problems for her down the road.

I would skip the summer stuff, give your child some time off and start up fresh in the fall. If the school refuses, I would not send my child to that school. Sounds too stressful. They are only kids for such a short time. Your son's giftedness will shine through whether he goes to school in the summer or not. I hope you enjoy your Disney vacation!

 

[claudia]

Thank you everybody for all the replies!

I was a little confused on what to do , after what I went thru with my younger son (thank God is over) , I did not wanted to be accused of bad parenting by letting my son decided for himself, I spoke to him explained that it was OK whatever he decided but we gave him the choice of schools, he wants to stay where he is now with his friends, and he adores his teachers, so to me is OK, not because of our vacations(I was prepared to cancel them and do something different) but also we do not want to force something on him that he might not want to do, and I wanted him to enjoy the summer after working so hard in school all year. Thank you everybody for all the support and I feel better knowing that it is OK sometimes let kids choose (specially when it has to do with their schooling)

I think that you are an excellent parent....you reached out for help on something that you were unsure of, you analyzed your choices and the replies, you spoke with your son about this issue and you both made a choice that you felt was in his best interest.....it doesn't get any better than that....bravo

 

[shortbun]

Yep! Great job Mom!

 

[Threehearts]

Both my kids are ID'd as GT with my daughter passing the MENSA test three times over 6 years. After she skipped 2 grades and had increasing anxiety, I took her to a psychologist who gave me the best advice ever, "Smart kids don't stop being smart kids. Let your daughter enjoy all of the fun in being a kid." My son has been kept in his regular classroom but gets help with his dyslexia. I did not send him to the GT magnet program that he got into. I now work full-time as an advocate volunteer for the learning and emotionally disabled. These kids might not score highly on tests but you've never seen a smarter group of children in your life. By the way, my husband was told that he should be a car mechanic on his high school aptitude test. He ended up a Fulbright Scholar with a doctorate in science from MIT. I think he may have been happier sticking with working on cars. LOL. Threehearts

 

[teresajoy]

I'm not sure how old your DS is, but let me clue you in on what's in store for your gifted child.

My DD17 is also considered to be "gifted". She has taken all of the accelerated, honors and AP courses that she can handle. Her summers are not her own anymore. She has chapters to outline, novels to read, analyze and write papers about, math packets to complete and essays to write.

We've dragged text books with us on every vacation for the past 3 years. Spring break is just another excuse to pile on additional projects. We have a 4-day weekend right now and she had to email a physics assignment in today plus she has projects in AP US history, AP English and Career Development all due the first week of June.

SATs are on June 2 and she just finished taking 3 AP exams last week.

Compared to high school, college will be a breeze.

Now, knowing that your DS is probably facing the same future when he reaches high school, would you elect to deprive him of "summer vacation" this year? My advise would be to let him be a kid. Childhood is not a race, it's an adventure.

I haven't read through all of the posts yet, but I think this is most excellent advice! My son was marked as gifted when he was going into third grade. We had the chance of putting him in a special class. We jumped at the chance without really thinking it through. As a result, he literally had hours of homework each night and was under an unbelievable amount of stress. He was only 8 when he went into the class, and he took it for three years. Once he was in, he was too shy to admit he wanted out. He learned a lot, but I would NEVER do it again. It was just way too much. I want my kids to be kids as long as possible.

My son is now almost 15, and is still doing great in school, all A's on his report cards!

 

[teresajoy]

Thank you everybody for all the replies!

I was a little confused on what to do , after what I went thru with my younger son (thank God is over) , I did not wanted to be accused of bad parenting by letting my son decided for himself, I spoke to him explained that it was OK whatever he decided but we gave him the choice of schools, he wants to stay where he is now with his friends, and he adores his teachers, so to me is OK, not because of our vacations(I was prepared to cancel them and do something different) but also we do not want to force something on him that he might not want to do, and I wanted him to enjoy the summer after working so hard in school all year. Thank you everybody for all the support and I feel better knowing that it is OK sometimes let kids choose (specially when it has to do with their schooling)

You definetely did the right thing, talking to your son, and making the best decision for your own family.

 

[Banana magic]

I've been reading these posts because my DD8 was just accepted into the gifted program for 3rd grade next year. We have a meeting coming up to explain the program and now I'm really curious what it will entail after what I've read here about all the different types of experiences.

 

[amykathleen2005]

Just from my personal experience I feel that the gifted program does not become necessary until the middle school. For third, forth and fifth graders the same challenging activites can be done at home by the parents if they so desire. However, by middle school the students are splitting their separate ways and it is necessary to be placed in a more accelerated class.

 

[Banana magic]

Just from my personal experience I feel that the gifted program does not become necessary until the middle school. For third, forth and fifth graders the same challenging activites can be done at home by the parents if they so desire. However, by middle school the students are splitting their separate ways and it is necessary to be placed in a more accelerated class.

Do you know what types of things they have the younger kids do that you mentioned they can do at home? I am clueless. I didn't realize DD may be gifted until doing some reseach about her highly sensative behavior. Then I questioned her teacher and found she was being considered for program.

 

[ceopamom3]

Well, I was gifted and have two of three kids thus far identified as gifted. Will they be towers of business and industry someday? who knows... I love seeing them smile and laugh. They are children, and this is the time to teach them the importance of a balanced and healthy life. Family time, play time, and work time are all part of that. My children know that school is their job, and we expect them to do their best. My middle son is so naturally geeky that left to dwell in books year round, he would likely loose all social skills.

It is so tough to be a parent and make decisions for your children. I appreciate the OP's dilema. I really think the family travel that we do makes my kiddos better rounded people. I take them out of school for vacations. They catch up in a day. Life is so short and precious, and the childhood years fly by... Being identified as gifted is wonderful, seeing your child giggle with Goofy is priceless..

 

[amykathleen2005]

Do you know what types of things they have the younger kids do that you mentioned they can do at home? I am clueless. I didn't realize DD may be gifted until doing some reseach about her highly sensative behavior. Then I questioned her teacher and found she was being considered for program.

Yes sensitivity to feelings, etc. of herself and others is a sign of being gifted. Another big sign is a higher sense of humor, like making witty comments. Also the desire to go more in depth. Obviously these do not always equal a "gifted" child but that is really just a number, if someone has an IQ of 130, 129 or even 80 they would benefit just as much from some of these exercises as long as they had the desire to learn (provided these are attainable).

Anyways, any parent can do home activities to expand the child's school experience, not just the parents of gifted children. However, excellent exercises that I did when I was in 3rd, 4th and 5th grade "gifted" included ALOT of critical thinking like riddles and brain teasers as well as creative thinking. Just taking the extra step past an obvious answer and finding another way of looking at things. In addition, reading books at a higher reading level and doing a more in depth project, like looking at a particular character and doing some writing there. Also, we did a project where a different school sent us a box of items which were clues to where their school was, and we sent the same. We had about a couple of weeks to do research into where the school may be based on the clues and eventually pinpointed the exact state, city and school without any mention of any of these names.

I think that younger gifted programs just focus on a new way at looking at things and going above and beyond. It also encourages a love of learning by making it more exciting and challenging than that in the regular classroom.

 

[hentob]

I guess education comes frist for me and my children.

Are you sure

 

[McKelly]

I am the mother of gifted kids too and am reading this with great interest. I am always looking for ways to challenge my kids in fun ways, the sending clues about where you live sounds great, would anybody be interested in doing this with their kids over the summer?

 

[IDoDis]

Me, me! Sounds like fun! I'd like to see a sample of they types of clues allowed and how many to give. My DD would have fun with that. PM me if you are interested.

Another fun activity that my DD loves to do, is we give two word clues and the other person has to figure two rhyming synonyms. For example, I might say "winning bird." Then DD would think about it and her answer would be "lucky ducky." Winning = Lucky and Bird = Ducky. Another example would be "overweight feline." The answer would be "Fat Cat." The answer words have to rhyme.

 

[WendyisDarling]

I was told today that my older son got accepted for a gifted program for next september, and to be in this programs means saturday, and summer classes for him( he does not know yet!) so there goes our trip what I would like to know how Disney handle refunds we are in the free dinning and I already paid the trip the dates Aug 26 / sep 3...

So, to clarify -- to be in this programs means saturday, and summer classes for him
If he doesn't take the summer program then he can't be in the gifted program? This concerns me. I wouldn't trade G/T placement for a vacation.

The G/T program has been extremely important to my child's education.

However, I am in the minority and would not take my kids out of school for a vacation. Personal choice for our family, but I don't judge families that do. I know a few kids that have gone during the school year and it seemed OK. The teachers just gave them all the work ahead of time.

You asked about refunds. You are still in the time frame to get your deposit money back, so far as I know.

 

[grlpwrd]

For some education must not be that important. Vacation this year or you can own the company in ten years? I guess education comes frist for me and my children.

Oh please... the OP's son is only 8 years old. I am glad they made their decision.

I have 3 kids (my daughters) who all have been tested as gifted. Two of them did not enroll in TAG classes while one did. I really want them to actually have a childhood. The formative years are definitely important, but I think high school and college are the years that really, really matter and they can "show their stuff."

Why rush it? Yup, childhood is really an adventure, not a race.

 

[Todd&Copper]

While I agree with what most of you have said about the greater importance of gifted education in middle/high school, you should also be aware that some middle and high schools are reluctant to classify a child as gifted if they haven't been singled out as such earlier in their educational career. I was always at the top of my class and once I moved to a district that had a gifted program (when I was in third grade), I tested in immediately. It was a breeze getting into advanced classes in middle and high school b/c I had that designation in elementary school. I never had to "justify" myself after elementary; my placement in advanced classes was automatic unless I protested or couldn't keep up, and that never happened.
That said, I do think summer school and Saturday classes as excessive to an 8 year old. At that age, I would think of it more as punishment than stimulation (especially the summer school part).

 

[Buzz's Buddy]

Our 10 yr old son is also gifted and we are curently working with the school district to make sure he gets the education he needs. The past 2 years he has been able to do the Johns Hopkins Talented Youth Program in school and at home. This school year he leaves class for 5th grade math while he is in 4th grade. Next year they will probably advance him for reading as well. It is possible he could skip a grade and manage quite nicely. However, some of his teachers as well as our peditrician have suggested that we do not need to add additional stress to his life.

My wife and I feel very strongly about education and my wife's family are almost all educators, however we also feel he needs to be a well rounded 10 yr old boy. He was offered several gifted programs over the summer and he asked that we not send him to more than one camp becasue he was so rushed during the school year. He plays travel soccer, basketball, baseball and is in cubscouts, cadet band and the spring musical. He just wants to be a kid and we respect that. Does that mean we don't value education or want him to succeed? No, he wants to cure type 2 diabetes when he grows up. He still has a drive to learn but it doesn't always have to be structured. We took him out of school 2 years ago to go to Disney and had him film the experience for his class. He even talked to the castmembers in the World Showcase area and asked them to say hello to his class in their native language. The whole trip was a learning experience.

I think the OP did the right thing by asking their son what he wanted. I know my son thinks about things in a more mature way than most of his friends and he would be able to understand exactly what we were talking about. As long as he is not bored in school he will excel. It is true that some gifted students become bored in school and then fail to succeed but I think part of that also comes from parents who fail to recognize that their children are gifted. One of the reasons we pushed for our son to attend advanced math is because he was becoming bored with regular math. You need to keep on top of their education and make it work for each child.


Sorry this is so long but we have been dealing with this for several years. Our daughter is a sophmore and never attended any gifted program but is taking advanced and AP classes now.