This is for dizzi -- an account of my very own banana boat adventure...
Two years ago, I decided it would be a good idea to go on a banana boat ride. My friend gave me a free ticket, her husband wanted to go, she didn’t -- I figured, “what the heck, I’m game”?! A mistake in the making…
When I climbed on with my friend’s husband, I decided the best place to be was in the far back for a better ride. HAHAHA HAHAHA HAHA
I should probably mention that a lot of the water activities on
Castaway Cay had been canceled that day due to high winds/choppy water…but not the banana boat ride…
When I took my seat on the banana boat, I noticed that the ride was mostly filled with a large family from NY. They consisted of several line backer looking men and several rather large women. Now, don’t get me wrong; I am not a small girl…but I was the smallest one on this ride.
We took off – about 10 minutes into the ride…we hit a rather large wave and whoop there I go – into the water…the boat stops, pulls around and gets me out of the water – took one try and I was back on the boat. This time, I gripped with my hands and my legs…
10 more minutes go by and whoop…there goes one of the large women from the MIDDLE of the boat. One of the linebacker men tries to pull her in…no luck. He tries again, still no luck. He and a buddy try – still she is not getting out of the water. Then one of her companions yells that there is a shark in the water (not the brightest of ideas). I look (the water is clear) and indeed, there is a nurse shark underneath her on what looked like the bottom of the ocean. Aaaack, she panics! A few minutes of her shrieking go by and the shark is gone (I would be, too). She is in tears.
The men pulling the boat decide to circle around her in the boat and try to get her to board the boat that’s pulling the raft. I should mention that there is a ladder on the boat. She attempts to board the boat with help from the men…the boat dips so low into the ocean that it begins to take on water. She falls back into the ocean and the men decide to try again – with the same result. The men radio the jet ski operator back at shore and request assistance. He pulls up on a jet ski a little while later (all the while the passengers of the banana boat are just sitting and waiting while members of her party taunt the lady in the water).
The lady attempts to board the jet ski with help from the jet ski driver – SHE FLIPS THE JET SKI AND THE DRIVER (yes actually flips). He laughs, shakes it off and tries to let her board again. SHE FLIPS THE JET SKI AND THE DRIVER, AGAIN! He apparently decided he’d had enough – he boarded his jet ski and left.
At this point, her party is shouting, “just leave her fat a**” and “tow her in with a rope, behind the boat” (those are the nice ones). She is exhausted, she is crying and we are ready to go back. We have now been out on the water for 90 minutes (for a boat ride that is supposed to take 30). She is frustrated, we are frustrated…The men in her party decide to give one more last ditch effort. All of the men on that boat join together and FINALLY, they haul her into the boat…losing her tankini bottom in the process. The get her in the boat and the men and women in her party press her into the bottom of the banana boat and SIT on her. The men hauling us around retrieve her swimsuit bottom. We all try to look away as she attempts to wriggle into it. It was one of the WORST, most awkward boat rides EVER!!!
