OCD - Do you know anyone who has it?

[Tigger&Belle]

My 15yo son used to show some signs of OCD when he was younger (preschooler). He would have to line his toys up a certain way, could never eat if the coat closet doors were ajar, etc. Nothing major, but some things that were a little different. He did lose these tendencies, but did develop Tourettes by the time he was 6yo and ADD a couple years later.

My 6yo also has some tendencies. More in the orderly way he would like his life. He has to have a certain nighttime routine, with him saying certain things and us saying certain things. All kids are this way to a certain degree, but but he seems more this way than my other kids were. Not what I would call it OCD, but something that I will keep my eye on.

 

[luvflorida]

Yes!! See my previous post, but that is exactly what my friend's DD can't help and they sought treatment and that is what was diagnosed.

Did they seek treatment because they thought she needed help with perfectionism or were there other issues involved?

 

[saylormickey]

My Dad has it and is on medication. The older I get the more I seem to have silly rituals. I have to have everything even. That is not easy since I work in retail and i can not stand if someone buys something and throws off the balance.

 

[Goobergal99]

I have it really bad. I have had it since I was a kid but was never diagnosed until after DD was born and I had a horrible bout with post partum depression.
I can even tell you when it all started. When I was 10 years old, a year after my dad passed away, my cousin was murdered by her husband. He fled the city right after it happened and I was petrified he would come after us so every night I would check the windows everytime I heard a car go by, I'd run downstairs and check to make sure the door was locked. even after they found him and he was arrested, I still remained paranoid constantly checking the doors, windows etc.
Later after that anxiety settled (well really after he was given life in prison with no chance for parole when he confessed to planning the murder) I started to count things obessively, then came the obsessive list making, I was paranoid I would forget something so I would write lists over and over again to remind myself. I would check to ensure I had everything ready for school even after I had verified everything was intact. When I went to highschool things began to settle down and I didn't have any symptoms for a few years, then I had my DD and started college all around the same time. I was balancing a full time schedule, a part time job and being a mom in my freshman year of college, not an easy thing to do. About 6 months after she was born, I just became severely depressed, I started to wonder if I loved her and her dad and as I ruminated about it, I just got more and more depressed trying to fight it. I started to become a compulsive cleaner, just to deal with the obsessions. When ever I started to ruminate, I would clean to take my mind off of it.

Finally after a few months of this suffering my mom convinced me to go and see someone. I ended up spending three hours talking to my doctor about everything and after listening to me, he diagnosed me with severe OCD. At first he convinced me to try weekly visits to the office where I could vent to him, he felt it would help because he was removed from all of the things that caused me anxiety. he suggested I pick up the book "Brain Lock" and I must say it has helped me incredibly throughout the years.

I never needed to take medication for the anxiety and it has been 7 years since my diagnosis. I am still severely afllicted with OCD, but I have learned not to let it run my life. Now if I have a thought that causes me stress I remind myself that it isn't really me, it's the OCD and that usually helps. I do stuble sometimes and fall into that pit of despair where I think I will never feel happy again but I always pull myself out of it. One of the things I still continue to do is make lists and clean compulsively. I still can't leave my home unless things appear perfect to me, I also worry about things that will probably never happen. Like for instance, DH choking while I am at work and noone being there to help him, or my DD being injured. I know that it is just my obessive mind and I try and dismiss it, but every once and awhile it overpowers me and I let it pass. My DH has been extremely helpful and I love him more then ever, I have noticed that my OCD seems to come when I am the most content, I start to have doubts about the choices I made in my life and then I begin to ruminate but most times it is totally controllable. It's a nastly little disease but it's also a treatable one

 

[luvflorida]

Does anyone know if it's common for perfectionism to lead to OCD? Is it at all the same?

I seem to be fixated on this. Maybe I'm a bit OCD.

 

[CathrynRose]

Does anyone know if it's common for perfectionism to lead to OCD? Is it at all the same?

I seem to be fixated on this. Maybe I'm a bit OCD.

Im not a perfectionist, at all - and I have OCD. Weird goofy things too.

The way some posters mentioned numbers, I have those issues with colors. All my colors around me have to match. Small examples - The pen I use for the day at my desk, has to match what Im wearing, my undies have to match my shirt, my nail polish has to match what Im wearing too... and the nails and toes have to be the same, or I cant stop thiking about it NOT matching.

I also have Trichotillamania (pull my hair out...we talked about that, on the boards before) and I have a *thing* with holes. They creep me out - freak me out, and have me obsessing about them for days if I see them. (anyone ever get that breast-rash email? I was FLIPPING OUT about it. Couldnt get that image out of my head!)

But I'm not a perfectionist by any means at all. In fact I do most stuff half-butt and would be considered lazy by most of my peers.

 

[grinningghost]

Thanks for all the replies everyone.

Now that I've read them, I'm totally convinced this is what my dad has. We're living with my parents until our new house is built and it's so difficult to deal with his obsessive behavior.

I do believe he has severe OCD, but I'm sure he'll never ever admit it or seek treatment. He thinks WE are the ones with the problems.

I only wish I had thought of it this way when I was a kid - it would have made his behavior easier to tolerate, knowing it was disorder, and not just him being a jerk.

Now, my question is - how do we deal with him? Is it better just to ignore his rantings about orderliness? It seems talking to him when he gets like this makes him worse. I'd appreciate some advice, I'll be here for quite a while.

 

[Mom2Ashli]

I have to check light switches, locked doors, fans, stove, sinks and whatever to make sure things are okay. I just keep walking in circles around my house until I finally tell myself that is enough and leave. Than I worry about it all the time I am gone.

Normally I try to leave the house after a couple of rounds than make my DH go back and double check once for me.

I also have a ton of worry that goes along with it. Several time I have left the house only to return to double check everything again. The worry is the worst, I always end up sick to my stomach. It does help when DH does the finally check because than as we are leaving I just ask him if he checked this or that.

 

[MickeysMommy]

I'm a perfectionist and I have a mild form of this. I don't have to do things in numbers but everything has to be just so. I am constantly washing my hands. If I write something, even if it's just a scribble note and I make a mistake, I have to rewrite it. In high school and college, if I was taking notes and I made a mistake I'd have to rewrite it all over. At home, the pictures on the mantle are in a certain place and if they aren't in that place it drives me crazy. At work, everything on my desk is in a certain place. My desk calendar is all in the same color pen. I only use a blue pen for my checkbook. I could go on...Maybe it's not so mild

 

[shortbun]

My Dad is really bad. He has worn all purple for years. His collections are enormous. He was meticulous for years and now he does not bathe often. He swears he can not breath without this little tube up his nose. The doctors have found nothing. The tube is always up there. I can see him sitting and counting when people are around. It calms him. He used to be a social butterfly, now he is a recluse. He has always had to have everything JUST SO. We always thought he was a selfish, self centered s.o.b.; now we know he has a severe disorder. I think he self medicated for years with alcohol but stopped drinking abruptly and all the other stuff began. It's a weird disease. How do you deal with him? We just do our thing and let him do his. Family functions happen, he's invited. He does what he can do. We do what we can. My dad will not see a doctor about it. He can't see the forest for the trees. Good luck.

 

[ducklite]

I have two friends who have it. One has been on medication and therapy for it since before I met him ten years ago. He has to do things in threes.

The other friend is a hoarder/collector. Very badly. To the point that she had pathways to get through the piles of stuff that were over three feet high in her apartment, and her local Department of Social Services was called in after the fire marshall was called in by the landlord.

She's now getting therapy and taking medication for this.

Anne

 

[KimR]

The other friend is a hoarder/collector. Very badly. To the point that she had pathways to get through the piles of stuff that were over three feet high in her apartment, and her local Department of Social Services was called in after the fire marshall was called in by the landlord.Anne

DH's grandmother is exactly the same way. I suspect my MIL also has a mild form of OCD as well. She doesn't hoard stuff but she has a tendency to fixate on specific topics - weird things, too. For example, for the longest time she was completely obsessed over what my DDs wore to bed. It was very strange and she eventually got over it (after YEARS) but probably only because I became annoyed with it. FYI, she is very much a perfectionist as well.

 

[DMickey28]

I wonder if this is something I have in a mild form, or if I am just odd! I have a mild form of depression and was on meds for 8-9 months and just recently gotten off. I am doing well. I have anxiety... I can't stop worrying. About everything. I worry about money, moving, packing, grocery shopping, bills, school, work, everything. I am getting better at it though.

I have to have things a certain way, mostly at night when I go to bed. I have to remake the bed before i go to bed. I need the sheets to be smooth and perfect. Drives DH nuts, and he drives me nuts b/c he bunches up the sheet and as smooth as I make it on my side it's always messed up a little. I have to have the closet and bathroom doors closed at night, I prefer the bedroom door shut too but DH usually opens it after I fall asleep. I am very picky about my dishes in the cabinets too... I hate emptying the dishwasher and that's DH's job but I always go in and "fix" the way he put the dishes away...

I think I am just odd...

 

[XYSRUS]

Everbyody's crazy...just to differing degrees. But, if a habit interferes with daily living then, I would say it is time for some professional help. Stay supportive and non-judgmental.

 

[BeNJeNWaFFLe]

I don't know if perfectionism can be considered an OCD, but sometimes I think it is. I am a perfectionist. When I was in school I would rewrite my homework a few times because it was never good enough. My desk had to be kept a certain way. Things have to be symetrical. I like things to go from biggest to smallest. Then I worry about color order and alphebetical order. My notebooks were pefect. Notes had to be indented certain ways, and there could be no crossouts.

I also have a slight OCD. I hate to feel dirty. Especially my hands. Greasy foods are the worst. The OCD doesn't stop me from eating french fries, but I will use a lot of napkins. I would eat a fry, wipe my hands, eat a fry, wipe my hands again. I never noticed I was doing it until DBF said something to me. It is not the germs that bother me, its the feeling of it. Greasy, wet, dirty, sticky, it all bothers me.

OP: I'm not expert but I think in most cases, unless the OCD is hurting their quality of life, it is sometimes best to leave it alone. If they are harming themselves or having mental breakdowns from disorder, then maybe medical assistance is needed.

 

[barbeml]

I think he self medicated for years with alcohol but stopped drinking abruptly and all the other stuff began.

I believe my DBIL self-medicated with alcohol for years, too. However, once he was diagnosed diabetic, he had to quit the booze and his OCD got MUCH worse. Unfortunately, I think he is about to blow his stack and he is drinking and eating lots of sugar again to deal with his demons, and his sugar numbers are through the roof. Sadly, although it is obvious to me and DH what is wrong with DBIL, he does not have a clue (he has learning disabilities as well) and is in denial about many things.

My stepfather self-medicated with food (he is in total denial that anything is wrong with him). Since he developed a heart condition and had to cut down on food, the OCD has escalated.

 

[lecach]

I have an even numbers thing - it doesnt really affect my life all that much. I dont like to get out of bed til the time is an even number. I wont turn off the tv until the time is even. When pumping gas it has to stop at an even number.

 

[grinningghost]

Update - the OCD-like thing has escalated to the point where I think we're going to have to move out. Let's just say, things got horribly ugly at dinner tonight (DD's BIRTHDAY dinner, no less). I am in a really sad state of mind right now.

Unless he offers to get some help, I can't see putting my kid through this any longer.

 

[mylilnikita]

My cousin has OCD. He and I used to work together at a department store, hanging clothes. He started with washing hands. It eventually got to where he thought his car was smoking and asked people if it was smoking, then what should have taken a 5 minute drive to work turned to 30 minutes, because if he hit a bump or whatever, he thought he hit someone and had to turn back and see if there was someone in the road. He is on meds, but doesn't drive and really isn't that self sufficient and it is so sad.

 

[goofy's friends]

Did they seek treatment because they thought she needed help with perfectionism or were there other issues involved?

There were other things too, but that seemed to be a primary concern. With the perfectionism was the constant worry that she wasn't pleasing--not pleasing her family, teachers, friends. She was going overboard saying Sorry and begging for forgiveness even for things that she didn't do, but thought she might do. She was erasing holes in her papers because it wasn't perfect and then would sit and stare at her paper and didn't want to start because she MIGHT make a mistake. She would apologize all the time that her teachers had to limit the # of times that she could say she was sorry to them in a day. She would have melt-downs about disappointing someone, thinking she disappointed someone, or might disappoint someone. She lost friends and her parents and siblings were at a loss on how to help her.

ETA: She has the hand-washing issue too and her room has to be perfect.