New Year's Eve 2008 12/27/08 SEE POST#1 FOR LIST

[nskjerven]

thanks for the heads up on Aisling. I'll have them in my prayers. Please let us know if you hear from her and let her know we are all thinking of them sending good thoughts their way. Family illness can consume you. But knowing that you guys had my back during my time of need with this was ever so comforting.

Alcatraz is really cool. Jill, you would love it. I think it might be one of those things you need to have tickets for in advance, since it's a holiday weekend. I wasn't planning on seeing you anytime early on Saturday. Really there isn't anything great to see here in San Jose. I was going to give you the 5 cent city tour when I get you from the airport. Since our driving down together plans crashed and burned with Paul's "I'm not driving" mode...perhaps, you might want to rethink the staying here and maybe opt for a night in Monterey? That my friend is a beautiful place to stay. You could do SF during the day, come thru SJ for afternoon lunch/dinner/movie, then zoom to Monterey and have more time to really see that site. Okay, I've done it again Monkey Wrench!!!! thinking and talking outloud. There really wasn't any advantage to staying near us other than if we drove down together....

shall I shut up now?

 

[tiggerwannabe]

Thanks for the idea but I think we'll stick with the Pruneyard...

I can take care of getting tickets for the Alcatraz Tour, thanks for the heads up. I like the idea of having a fairly relaxing day in San Fran, head over to your area for dinner and a movie and some Skjerven company and then take a lovely drive down the coast.

Monterey will be the only must see on my itinerary, the coast will be a nice ride for us since we like to sightsee. Our sightseeing will be more driving than stopping and when we need to stop we'll pick nice spots to stop. I even got direction from a local on how to take 1/101 down the coast and even see a little of LA before we get into Anaheim.

 

[trinibjill]

I would definitely love to see Alcatraz. It might remind me of work since my prison was built in 1835.

 

[grimgrinnin]

Happy (late) Easter!

Haven't been around much, as the new job is keeping me busy. My current project is philosophy.com. I actually worked on the existing site in my last job. It's a Small IT World.

Ciao!


grim

 

[trinibjill]

I was wondering where you were.

That's a very philosophical site! I would have NEVER guessed.

Adorable (Miss Piper that is) What is holding her bow in? The first two teeth have shown up. Was teething fun?

 

[Aisling]

Hi gang,

Grim, thanks SO much for posting Piper's Easter pic. She's a doll!!! It really made me smile., and I can't wait to meet her.
After I post here, I'm going to check out your site. It sounds like your job is keeping you very busy.

I want to fill you all in on what's going on in my life right now.
Mel's 88 year old father is very sick, as Tiggie told you. On Easter Sunday, Mel's mom called and said daddy isn't doing well, and that Mel needs to think about going to see him. They live in the Philippines, and Mel hasn't been back there since he left as a young child in 1972. His parents lived here for many years, and 2 years ago they went back to the Philippines to retire. Mel hasn't seen his sister and brothers in 30 years (he has one brother here, in Florida, but they aren't close), so it's all a big emotional thing for him.

The factors in this equation are complicated. Mel doesn't show his feelings, and so it's hard to know what's going on inside his heart. If it were MY father, I would have been on that plane already. Also, his family is not close emotionally, even when his parents were living here, it was more of a quiet Asian respect relationship than open hugging and loving. So I think Mel is conflicted with his love for his father mixed with not really having an emotional bond or knowing how to express it.

Mel emailed his sister and asked her to tell him straight out, how bad is daddy. She answered that daddy isn't bedridden, but is very weak and declining rapidly. He has Alzheimer's, can't walk unaided, and has lost all control of his bodily functions, but refused to wear an adult diaper. He doesn't seem to understand that he's so ill. This is VERY upsetting to us, because this man was a practicing physician and med school professor until his late 70s, and was active, very intelligent, and independent when we last saw him 2 years ago when he came for a visit. The sister sent an email pic, and daddy has lost a lot of weight and looks like skin and bones.

Mel wants to wait for July, when he has his regular vacation, I know it sounds horrid, but remember there are bottled up emotions at work here. I thknk he's scared to go back to the Philippines. I told him no fear, I'll go with him, I'll be his rock, and it'll be ok. For his mother to ask him to come asap, well, that means a lot, because she has never asked this before.

To make things worse, my very emotional family (sibs and parents) are getting into it and making comments to Mel that aren't appropriate, but they mean well. They're coming down hard on him, with things like "he's your father for god's sake, don't you care?" This kind of attitude makes Mel clam up and retreat and become paralyzed. My dad keeps pressuring Mel to "go tomorrow", every day he's been calling and asking "did you get the plane ticket(s) yet?" Mel keeps saying it's too expensive for us all to go, and even for me to go with him, but we have the money, and even my parents have offered money if we need it. I think Mel is using money to help him stall, because he doesn't know what to do. It is very expensive, though, at least $1300 for one ticket, plus hotel expenses, since Mel says he'd be more comfortable at a hotel than in the family home in the Philippines.

Also, I'm nervous about the both of us leaving the kids. I really don't want to go, since the State Dept has issued warnings for Americans traveling to the Philippines, and I would stand out like a sore thumb and be a target. If it was in the tourist areas, it would be ok, but his family lives in the countryside, where people aren't too friendly to Americans.

So that's where it stands. When Mel comes home from work tonight, we'll talk more. He has to get malaria and avian flu shots before he goes, so I have that info ready for him. As it stands, I'm not going with him, even though I'm still feeling it out if I should pressure him into not going alone, only because in case he needs emotional support. Chad would go with him, but Chad is graduating from college next month, and this is a time when, if he misses any school, it wouldn't be good for him. He has finals and projects due at scattered timed for the next 4 weeks before graduation. Of course, in a family emergency, the college could work with him and figure something out for him to get it all done before graduation, but the question is should we do this?

As for Mel's brother in Florida, Mel won't even call him. They could go together. They get along, but haven't seen each other or spoken in years, not for any particular reason other than not being a close family, and Mel feels uncomfortable calling him. We're assuming mommy called the brother, too, but the two knucklehead brothers haven't connected on this.
Meanwhile, daddy is declining while we all dance around deciding what to do.

Other than that, we're fine here. My house is a mess, but hey what's new. I just don't feel like getting things done around here, but I should because when I start, I always enjoy the result, especially when it's spring cleaning.

As I type this, my mom is calling on my cell phone, and I know what her first words will be...did you get the tickets, what you're not going with him, why didn't he go yet, are you waiting for the man to die, etc...

Anyway, thanks so much for the prayers and support. It means a ton to me.

I have to run out now and get something to cook for tonight. Chad will be calling from the subway soon for a ride home, and I pick up Jesse at 4, so I don't have much time.

I'll get Chad's pics up tonight, it'll give me something fun to do. And hopefully Louise will write a trip report. Lou, are you reading?

 

[nskjerven]

Thanks for sharing sweetie. We are all here for you with big open hearts and arms. Feel my hug

Families can be the best and the worst things to have and deal with. I know you are trying your best to keep the peace between all of them. My prayers will be sent for your strength and support. Of course along with prayers for Mel and his father (mother & siblings)

LYMI,

Nan

 

[nskjerven]

Miss Molly on stage....

This is her during her scene in the play last month....she was a contestant in a Sacagawea look alike contest vying for the prize of marriage....I told you it was a strange plot, right???

After the performance with her best buddy Hannah

yes Hannah was also in the above mentioned Sacagawea look alike contest vying for the prize of marriage...

Fortunately for us, they lost, the contest.

Off to a birthday party. Hope you liked the pics.

Nan

 

[bride2007]

Aisling, you have such a lot on your shoulders right now. My thoughts and prayers are mostly with you, because as the stable force in your family you need them more. You sound like such an awsome woman and if you're not told that enough by your family, you can count on your DIS buddies to tell you.

I'm very surprised to hear that Mel's family isn't close. I come from a Philippino family (on my dad's side) and we are all very huggy, kissy and loving. I hope that Mel will get through all of this with few emotional scars. It's too bad that something like this can't bring he and his brother together again. Why do men have to be so stuborn!

BIG HUG

 

[tiggerwannabe]

Piper Looks soooo purty and happy!

Congrats to Molly on her Big Debut!!!

Hugs to you and yours Aisling, lemme know what you decide when you decide my friend~

A Big Hello to everyone else out there!

 

[Aisling]

Thanks everyone.
Debbie, cool to hear that you have Filipino family! And the huggy, loving kind. Sounds . Any pics to share of you and yours? I heard a rumor that you have gawgeous red hair.

Now about Miss Molly...holy flower-in-bloom, Batman!!!!! She looks like an official pre-teen! Thanks for sharing, Nan.

Tiggie, how's the allergy? I read somewhere that you were attacked by carpet dust! Be careful, lady! But I give you a ton of credit doing a job like pulling up carpet. Can you come over and do my front windows??

 

[tiggerwannabe]

The hives are getting better...I'm still treating them

Gold Bond is my saviour...not literally, but it relieves my itchies while I am at work and can't do anything else to treat it. My medz and a couple showers/baths a day also help.

Sorry honey, you'll have to do your own windows...it's hard enough to keep up with my regular housework being allergic to dust.

 

[BeLLaNoTTe]

Hi Everyone!

Grim... Piper is adorable

!I've been M.I.A for a while...been busy with work and such. I need to register for my Masters program but i have yet to apply to any schools.. Don't ask what i am waiting for...Ya know what they say "Why put off procrastinating when you can do it today."

Anyway, i hope all is well for everyone and Aisling you know we all love you and are here for you.

I heard that some WDW pics are wanted...but my comp is in the shop, so i took some off chad's facebook...so these are all i have:

Chad with talking trash can

Us at Cinderella's Royal Gala G.F

Characature

 

[Aisling]

My boy is wearing his crocs! How cute.

 

[tiggerwannabe]

My boy is wearing his crocs! How cute.

Complete with Jibbitz!!!



You two are a beautiful couple Louise~

Thanks for posting your pictures here.

I like your saying about procrastinating, I don't think I've ever heard that one before

 

[bride2007]

Good Morning All,

Aisling, yes I do have red hair and Miss Clairol helps me with those dark & grey roots about every six weeks. My Uncle Fred (who is our Philipino family historian), thinks it's great to have a token white, red head in the family. I look just like my mother and there have been times, that I have accused her of messing around with the milk man and that's how I came about. She just smiles. If I can get DH to help me, I will try and post some pictures this weekend.

I love the pictures of Chad & Louise. They are such a cute couple!

 

[tiggerwannabe]

Morning Cruisers!

Nan, the check is in the mail...thanx for the great idea. We get to experience another part of California we hadn't thought of, we get to meet our new friend Debbie and her new Hubby and we get to spend some quality sit down time with the Skjerven Clan!

I'm up early today, already dropped Penny off at the groomer, John and Brittany went to defensive drving school and after my shower I'm off to get my hair cut. Dad also told me this am that his sister is stopping by for a visit before she and her hubby head back to FL. In between all that I gotta get me some laundry done

I wish everyone here an enjoyable weekend. Nan, hugs to your friend. Aisling, let me know how the planning is going lady-enquiring minds wanna know how you are.

Mom, Grim, Dede and Piper, Chad and Louise, Bride and Ohiomom, and anybody else I missed...

Hi!!!

 

[ohioworkingmom]

Thanks for the well wishes. Hopefully this will be the last weekend for working, and the last week for REALLY LONG hours. Taxes are all due by April 17 for those of you who have procrastinated!! Mine is done and refund is already in a CD, saving up for the cruise You all have a great weekend too, sure wish I could head to California, never been there, and would love to go sometime in my free rotfl2time!!

 

[tiggerwannabe]

Rose and I planned this trip our last year as girl scout leaders together, 1999 I believe...

IOW, it's been a long time coming. Rose brought it up again about 6 months ago and I had to commit or not, so I did. The only reason we can is cause only two of us are going. I wish I could afford to take the whole family.

Maybe next time

What year does Molly graduate Nan, maybe we can pencil in a family trip for that year?

 

[nskjerven]

hmmmm born in '97...add 18 years to that 2015....but remember, Molly travels everywhere allready. she might want to go into outer space by then. we talked about Paris for her 13th bday, but oops went there last summer. we haven't come up with what to do for that one yet, so that's the next big thing to plan. Paul has been mentioning South America lately, might be there sooner than we think.