Need to vent about bringing family!

gracelrm

<font color=teal>Wow - you learn something new eve
Joined
Jul 1, 2002
Messages
1,757
I've noticed several posts recently about bringing friends/family to WDW and the problems or concerns that come with it. Well, now I'm posting! We have had a family trip for DH's extended family planned for about 1 year. Had everyone commit at the 11 month window(last July) and we needed 2 - 2BR and 1 studio to fit. At Christmas when we were all together we reconfirmed with everyone to make sure they were all scheduling work vacations at the correct time. About 1 month before the 31 day window for cancellations we talked to everyone again, and yes everyone was still on board. We sent an email out 1 week before and said we had to know of anyone not going by Wednesday, May 12th and explained how we'd be "stuck". Everyone still going!! We were so excited - it was really going to happen. Then Sat. May 15th BIL calls to say another BIL & SIL are cancelling out! He didn't even have the decency to call himself to tell us. DH was mad, but hey, it's his family. I was IRATE! We needed to put 134 points into holding with no real hope of using them before the end of our UY. Anyway, after a day or two of being angry, I thought why not just endulge those of us who are still going with the extra space and not be quite so cramped. We'll keep the extra studio and all have a little more room to spread out! Now, I feel much better, but if anyone else backs out - heads are going to roll!!!!!!!
 
Well, now you know whom NOT to invite ever again!!!!! There are several people on our "never again" list, although they just have no clue why we never invite them anymore :rolleyes:

There are also a few on our "you're welcome anytime" list, provided we have the points and they let us know far enough in advance so we can book the extra room(s). :)
 
It's almost impossible for non-members to understand how the DVC system works.

It's too bad that this happened. I'm sure that they'll be kicking themselves for not going when they hear about the beautiful accommodations that they missed out on.
 
Sorry about your situation. Been there, done that. Just don't invite them again, ever.
 

Yup, permanant residents of the botttom of the "not welcome" list. Don't let them spoil your good time tho.. and take plenty of pictures of the fun to share when you get back.. Have a great trip :sunny:
 
For my family and our friends, this topic isn't much of an issue but when we took my in-laws down a few years back we made sure they were aware of the cost to us, in $'s, if they chose to back out at the last minute. We didn't want to bring up how much it was going to cost us since this trip was our gift, but sometimes it's easier if the non-dvc guest has a reference to which they can relate.

-Joe
 
Originally posted by dvcreg
It's almost impossible for non-members to understand how the DVC system works.

I agree with Regina completely. No matter how I try to explain it, people still think of DVC as a time share with a certain accommodation being assigned to us. So they assume that you've got that accommodation whether they come or not, so what's the big deal?

I think it was pretty wimpy of them to not even call you to cancel too. I think they'd get crossed off our invitation list for future trips too.
 
Spreading out and enjoying the extra space is a nice solution. Somebody in your inner circle might also have a friend who wants to come along at the last minute. Anyway, just be glad it's not your own family, so you don't have to apologize to your DH. It's always better the other way around.
:smooth:
 
Gracelrm ~
Glad you were able to see a bright side to all of this---with the extra space. I would be very upset/frustrated with my family for doing this especially since you gave them consistant and regular head's up about the situation of the 31 day cancellation. The fact that they didn't even call themselves is what I feel is the insult upon insult. They owe you a night out for dinner at the very least. Try not to let this spoil any of the fun. I hope the remaining family members and yourself have a wonderful trip in your spacious DVC digs. -----> evil thought here-----> make sure you take lots of pics and video of all the fun you're having and make certain that BIL and SIL see it :earboy2:
 
Family is important to all of us and sometimes we have to forgive for the things that they do, i dont think anyone really understands the rules, how important and cash value of the points really are, unless they are a dvc member too.

maybe your BIL will call and tell you that they changed their minds and they are still going, in that event.....

take them to tower of terror and make them ride it all day and night and never let them get off!::yes:: pirate:
 
I had something similar happen but with good friends. About 5 weeks out all were still going--had rearranged the trip around a teacher's schedule and set up a 2 bedroom. Called them 2 1/2 weeks out to set up a "let's go over the map" visit as they were going to follow me in another vehicle and they said they weren't going!! No apology or anything. Then to add insult to injury they said they knew 2 months ago!! Gee, thanks for telling a nice lie when I called 5 weeks out. . . :mad: To say I was irate is an understatement. I scrambled around trying to find friends who would be willing to go and use the studio side of the 2 bedroom and luckily found some friends who would go on short notice. In the future, I will be calling people 33 days out and telling them if they back out less than 30 days they can pay me the rack rate in cash. I feel the lack of apology is an insult and these "friends" will no longer be on my "invite to DVC" list. It makes you think twice before asking people to go. . . And this is after family backed out late last year on the same trip!!

Still, some friends who would not have gone are now getting an opportunity to see WDW from the DVC side so good did come out of this and I am going to see the glass as half full!! :sunny:

SimbaCub
BCV May 2004
 
I'll do the venting for everyone....

AUGHHHHHHHHHH!!!:crazy:

Does anyone else feel better? I love the "not to be invited again list" but what do you do when that includes your entire family:confused:

It is so annoying. Next time they need to get their own reservations, and you need to adopt a new family.:rolleyes:
 
Sorry to hear that. But...just think of all the room you will have and what a luxurious vacation it will be.
 
posted by rocketriter:

"Anyway, just be glad it's not your own family, so you don't have to apologize to your DH. It's always better the other way around".

LOL!!! SO TRUE!
 
I have the opposite problem. I invited certain family member 6 months ago to go on our Dec trip via email and they never responded so I assumed that they didn;t want to go and invited my friends to fill their spot. Then yesterday they sent back an email saying that they would be delighted to come and can't wait to see everyone again. Of course now I don't have the room and even if I borrow points at my expense there is nothing left at the boardwalk for that timeframe unless I pay cash for rooms whic is $$$$ dollars. Now I should just say sorry but I didn't hear from you and gave away the room but this is my nephew who because of a divorce in the family I haven't seen in 30 years until recently and I was trying to rebuild a relationship. I have also had people cancel on me last minute when I've paid for airfare so now I never get involved with the travel arrangements. They are less apt to cancel if they have paid for the airfare themselves rather than I'll reimburse you later and then you are stuck. Not all family are bad but the list is in place in my house too.

We also include on the list a SIL who has had a lovely beachfront home that she rents out to strangers but has never offered to let us stay there. when she sees me taking everyone else in the family she gets steamed but hey fair is fair.
 
When booking for extended family and multiple units, we usually try to book one of the units entirely on cash, and split the cost between all the guests. We heavily supliment the enitre stay, they pay a small amount for a great vacation, and we have the option of cancelling the cash room with no negative impact on our points.
 
These people would be on my "do not invite ever again" list, and if they asked me why I never invite them to WDW, I'd tell them that the one time I did, they screwed me, hence, they get no invitation, ever again. Their behavior is inexcuseable, especially in light of the fact that you kept everyone updated by e-mails as to the repercussions of cancelling after a certain date. I know there are people who don't know how the DVC system works, but if I got an e-mail from someone saying "after X date, if you cancel it will mean a loss for us,"well...unless they're stupid, that's pretty clear.

As another poster said, perhaps another family member or close family friend could come last minute. I also like your idea of being able to "spread out" a bit more though. There is something to be said about "space" especially on a trip where there are a lot fo "personalities"...you all can, at times, get on each other's nerves.

To the psoter who never heard from someone they invited, who is now saying they can't wait to go to WDW. I'd tell the truth. I'd say "we never heard a definite answer form you, and since we had to firm up arrangements, we invited so-and-so. Let's plan another time we can go and firm up dates so I can make arrangements." You are not responsible for someone else's lack of initiative in responding in a timely fashion.
 
I have the opposite problem. I am usually having to fend my family off from inviting themselves to join us. There were times I didn't particularly care for my brothers and sister while growing up and there are times they still try my patience. We all went camping for a week a few years back and about killed each other so to say the least I am not in a huge hurry to invite them along to the happiest place on earth. I now find myself having to keep our vacation plans a secret.
 
I'm reminded of the poster a couple of years ago that planned a trip with her family and mother, etc. Then her mother invited a sister or SIL that to planner didn't really want to invite. In the end the trip ended up leaving out the person who planned and originated the trip. I was truly sad for this person.
 
What do others do when invited guests are so worried about money that it may ruin the whole trip? My MIL and FIL are coming with us to SS at Thanksgiving. We are providing the accomodations, a rental car, and PHs with two days left on them. They are still complaining about cost (my DH would like to play golf, and I would like to go to the parks for more than two days). Any advice?
 



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