Need advice on resort/family situation

[232271]

We are going to Disney with my BIL/SIL and their children.

We are flying on the same flights, there and back.

However, they have more "money" available then we do and booked a deluxe resort that we cannot afford.

I am really saddened by this because I thought we were doing
Disney together.

I want to see what you guys think about staying at different resorts and trying to meet up, how stressful is this?

and we have tried reasoning with them, but they seem set on
staying at the deluxe resort.

any advice is appreciated.



p.s what do you tell the BIL when he keep insisting we
try to stay with them? w/o upsetting them?

 

[bigbabyblues]

I think it would be ok to meet up with them and do things together. That also gives you some time with just your family. If you get tired of the big group thing, you can split off and do things on your own.

I'd try not to stress about it, easier said than done, I'm sure. Stay where you can stay, let them do the same, and enjoy your vacation.

Steph

 

[kdonnel]

We stayed at the All Star Sports one trip while my brother-in-law's family stayed at the Wilderness Lodge.

It seemed to work out fine. The only problem we had was the kids wanted to swim together. So we pool hopped the kids over to the WL.

 

[JandT'smom]

This might actually be better than being in the same resort. You can share some time together but also have your own space and family time.

 

[Del]

We stayed at PO now POFQ and my SIL stayed at GF. They had the money to do it--we didn't. We met up for some meals and then did evening park time together. The days were left to our own--I believe one day we may have pool hopped over there. It was great...we each our own down time. Just tell them upfront...we wish we could stay at your resort but it's not in our budget... and if they wanted to switch to your resort, they would have but want to stay at a deluxe...let them do it without guilt. i wish you luck...it may just work out for the best. have a blast!


Del

 

[HopperFan]

We've been grouped several times and we've done different resorts several times.

Once we were PO and friends were at BC. We met them at BC for ice cream one night and had reservations at Cape May Cafe together one night. We met them late morning in MK, we are earlier risers and it worked out great. We stayed together till closing. We went to MGM together all day one day and met at EPCOT for Illuminations one night. Super trip. On other trips we have been at AKL or others, while relatives camped at FW. We meet at all the parks no problem and hooked up for dinners when not in parks.

Really very easy to do - have very set meeting times and locations OR book PS together. Cell phones make it easy. I also think the quiet time with just our family was important too !

ps Tell BIL "We already have our reservations and we are very excited about our hotel too!"

 

[Lewisc]

Separate resorts works out fine. One day meet for breakfast and do the parks together. Another day you might just want to meet up for lunch. Try to use cell phones to keep in touch.

Just tell them you're unable to budget the more expensive resort.

What resorts are you talking about? Is there room for compromise? Might you be able to handle a discounted rate at S/D, WL or AKL?

 

[Disney Ella]

I agree with everyone else. I would like to be at separate resorts. A few days of constant togetherness would be too much for me. I think it would be nice to have a little bit of time each day when you can just relax and be yourselves. Not that you can't be yourself with your BIL/SIL, but it's always nice to have some time when you're not worried about how the kids are behaving in front of other people, or if you want to make some remark to your DH, you can. Why can't you just tell your BIL you don't have as much money budgeted for this trip as they do, and maybe next time you'll all stay together? Or if you don't want to bring up money, say you always wanted to stay at this particular resort and it just wouldn't be the same anywhere else.

 

[232271]

they want contemporary

we want FQ at nearly 1/2 the price! of a regular wing room
at the Cont.

 

[Lewisc]

Originally posted by 232271
they want contemporary

we want FQ at nearly 1/2 the price! of a regular wing room
at the Cont.

If it matters keep checking for discounts for Contemporary wing rooms and for WL otherwise stay with FQ.

You might meet them at CR for breakfast the day you're doing MK and just meet them at the parks the rest of the trip. It will be good if at least one of you has a car. It will make it much easier if you want to hang out at one of the resorts.

The only reason it would be a major problem if you were thinking of getting 3 rooms, 1 for the kids from both families and one each for the parents.

If you're going during the week you might look at renting points for a stay at WLV. It might not cost any more than FQ and you'd be a boat ride from the CR.

 

[kda]

I would run, not walk, away from the idea of "doing Disney together". Friendships have been ruined by people trying to vacation together who weren't able to lay everything out on the table and realize that different people have different preferences and it's very difficult to make plans that will work for a group. Yes, some people do it --- depends on the people and their ability to discuss things openly and honestly AND they usually decide that they won't be spending every minute together. At least that's been our experience.

There are many compromises that need to be made when traveling in a group (ie, meals, time to get up, when to visit certain parks, when to take a pool break). Have you discussed meals? If they "have more money available", are your BIL/SIL thinking of a lot of character meals and sit down resteraunts that might not fit with your plans?

Cell phones and walkie talkies make it very easy to meet up (as long as you're not spending a lot of time on the phone and have to pay roaming). Even without them, make a plan to meet somewhere at a certain time and then have a back up plan of when and where to meet an hour or two later if that doesn't work out -- especially if staying at different resorts and using different transportation. Then no one is wasting their time waiting around.

You might be able to get a WL discount room for just a little more than a moderate. WL is a 5 minute boat ride from CR. Or just stick to your guns and make a budget decision that's right for your family. Why should either of your families have to spend the vacation in a resort that they're really not comfortable with? FQ looks wonderful and kids really seem to like the slide. I'm not sure the CR pool has a slide -- maybe I'm just forgetting about it.

Hope it works out great and you have a wonderful trip with special memories!

 

[cart-mom]

My sister and I just overlapped our vacations at WDW. She checked in to ASSp 8/23-8/30 and we checked into the Poly 8/25-9/2. We never "planned" on meeting up - we just figured we would hook up at a park or have dinner together some night. We're regulars for WDW and this was my nephew's first trip. We spoke everyday but never got to see each other because we were doing different parks or it was our "off" day to stay at the resort. No biggie. Both our families had a wonderful time and got to do what they wanted to do.

Your BIL should respect your situation and not try to force you to spend more money than you have in your budget. DH would have been happier spending less money at a value resort but once I stayed deluxe with a CM discount I just can't go back.

I agree with everyone else - keep the two resorts and meet up / have seperate family time.

Good luck & pixie dust for you * * * * *

 

[CoolBreeze]

And then enjoy your time at WDW even more!! Trust me, you're going to thank heaven your relatives are staying elsewhere!!! You have no idea how you are going to enjoy your mandatory split up at different times during your vacation!!

We've needed breaks and down time during our trips and have actually been accused of blowing our relatives off when we don't meet up with them at a specific time, etc. I have even accidentally powered our cell phones down so nobody can find us!!

Seriously, taking the family to WDW is an awesome thing. But, it is not, by any sense of the word cheap. The cost of a Disney "moderate" is as high or higher than a Manhattan hotel any day of the week. Remember that!

So... In closing, let your IL's stay wherever they please and remember one thing, you're going to be really glad when you take that first much needed break from them to head back to "your hotel" for some time away.

Have Fun.

 

[232271]

Thanks guys for all your advice! I think staying seperate is sounding better and better. I forgot how "stressful" being together is.

and actually my SIL said, "maybe we could switch and be
right next door to each other" I nearly fainted as this is not
quite what I had intended!!

I told her to keep her reservations as we are so unsure of
what we will do once AP rates are released for March.


Whew, I am glad I have this board to "sound off" on!
You guys are great!