My friend is making a HUGE mistake......

Can't help you with the second issue, dioxide45 - but on the first, you could offer to change seats with the person in the middle. Yes, I realize that puts one of YOU in the middle seat - but at least you're seated together.

That's actually something a lot* of travelers do on their own: two people flying together will book the window and aisle seats, and hope that nobody takes the middle seat - giving them more room ;). Sometimes they get lucky, sometimes not (and then, sometimes they're fighting by the time the plane boards, and they each keep their seats with the person in the middle seat as a 'buffer' :)).

*Not many, not most, not a majority (although not necessarily NOT any of those things ;))

DH and I did just that on Continental flying WC to EC. We got lucky on both flights.
 

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