My dd2 was called a BRAT today @Walmart:(

[ols386]

I think I was also making an example of the prevailing selfish attitudes running rampant in the United States today, which is:

MY (fill in the blank) is more important than YOUR (fill in the blank).

This thread is a perfect example. It's a perfect example of parents feeling that their children (their blank) are more important than anyone else's (fill in the blank). I think that's probably why this thread has gotten as long as it has. People are getting sick of being told that their (blank) isn't as important as someone else's (blank).

But isn't that what you and some of the others are saying? That your (fill in the blank), is more important than someone else's (fill in the blank)?

Don't get me wrong, I understand that hearing a screeching child in a public place is annoying....especially if it appears that the parent is not attempting to control the situation, but there may be things that you or I do in public that is annoying to others around us....and I don't expect them to get in my face and tell me to stop doing whatever it is I'm doing. I probably don't even realize that I'm annoying someone else. I don't go around trying to annoy others in public, but I'm sure I probably have a time or two.

 

[Fintastic]

Kids aren't always perfectly behaved. DD has had some tantrums in her six years on the planet, and DS is two months old and wants to eat around the clock so it's going to happen where we'll be out in public and he'll decide he's hungry, so he'll cry. With either of the kids, I do my best to calm them as best I can and remove them from the situation as soon as I can. I don't want to be "that mom" in public.

But honestly, I'm not going to leave a basket full of groceries because I have a fussy child. I'll speed up my shopping, and I'll do whatever it takes to quiet the child. When DD was younger I would bring crackers or little toys to keep her occupied while I shopping, and at DS's age it's not hard at all to take a 10-minute break to feed him. But it seems like more work in the long run to have to come back and start shopping all over again, not to mention the store employees having to restock everything in my cart. I work full time and I don't have time to just leave a full cart to prove a point. Thankfully a little preparation beforehand goes a long way towards keeping the kids content during shopping trips.

 

[Carly_Roach]

Okay- so I just returned from Walmart.

Here's what I encountered-- a man, thinking that it was fine to turn up a stereo to decibels off the hearing chart, so that he could hear it. I couldn't just hear it, I could feel it coursing thru my body.

Then, he left it that way, while he stood there for a full 15 minutes listening to it. It was Metallica, BTW.

Now I'm all for playing Metallica, and everyone knows that when you play Metallica- it's got to be loud. Heck, I've been to afew of their concerts myself.
But seriously, I really don't want to hear it while I'm trying to decide Fuji apple vs a Red delicious. ANd yes, you could hear it alllllllllllll the way to the front of the store, b/c when he started playing it, I left the back and headed up front.

So- people who think it's okay to say something to a parent of a child that is screeching-b/c the parent wasn't "In control", would you have said something to this man who made the entire store listen to his stereo because it was in your opinion, rude?

Or would you have silently shook your head and walked off?

What if the parent of the child had of been a male? Would you have said something like "Control your child" to him? If not, why???


Just curious.

I think you just described why Walmart attracts the dregs. At any department store, or even a Best Buy, they care too much about their equipment and stock to let that kind of incident happen for too long. At a Walmart, the employees don't give a crap if their customers break the floor models.

If that music was blaring for 15 minutes, surely the store manager was out of the building or something.

 

[jrmasm]

Okay- so I just returned from Walmart.

Here's what I encountered-- a man, thinking that it was fine to turn up a stereo to decibels off the hearing chart, so that he could hear it. I couldn't just hear it, I could feel it coursing thru my body.

Then, he left it that way, while he stood there for a full 15 minutes listening to it. It was Metallica, BTW.

Now I'm all for playing Metallica, and everyone knows that when you play Metallica- it's got to be loud. Heck, I've been to afew of their concerts myself.
But seriously, I really don't want to hear it while I'm trying to decide Fuji apple vs a Red delicious. ANd yes, you could hear it alllllllllllll the way to the front of the store, b/c when he started playing it, I left the back and headed up front.

So- people who think it's okay to say something to a parent of a child that is screeching-b/c the parent wasn't "In control", would you have said something to this man who made the entire store listen to his stereo because it was in your opinion, rude?

Or would you have silently shook your head and walked off?

What if the parent of the child had of been a male? Would you have said something like "Control your child" to him? If not, why???


Just curious.

Maybe he was drowning out a screeching kid?

 

[Jennasis]

To be quite frank about it YES I would indeed knock someone silly over calling my child a bad name, you better believe I would. And besides who would REALLY, REALLY be so low as to come up to a parent and a child and have the nerve to say something like that to the child with the parent standing right there and then NOT expect to get flailed? Good grief, Ive actually sat here and ran that scenario through my head and to be honest I wouldnt expect nothing less than the parent to kick my butt from one side of the store to the next.
You may say, and Im sure you will from the looks of it, all kinds of things about me and try to twist what I say or mean into all kinds of pretzels, I honestly do not care one way or another but I stand by what I say because I mean it. You come up to me in a place like wal mart and say something to me directly you may or may not get a discussion about it. Depending on how I feel at that moment I may very well walk off and leave you standing there BUT you come up to my child and call him or her a bad name and there will be no discussion about it period, and I can assure you I will not be walking off and whoever said it wont be walking off either.
Now I may be the only person on HERE that is that protective over their kids but I can assure you that Im NOT the only person in the world like that so to anyone who will ever deem it necessary to approach a child (not necessarily mine) and say something, they might want to think "well how important is it that I say this; do I want to let them know how I feel bad enough to end up at the police station?"
You may get lucky enough to find someone who will mutter something and walk off but then again you might come up on somebody like me.
My kids are the most important thing in the world to me and I will defend them fiercely.
I know, I know, LOLOLOL
Now im not directing this at anyone here im just stating how I feel personally about a situation like this.

I'm shocked that you would assault someone over name calling. Mostly because if you truly DO care about your children, assaulting someone and being arrested and thrown in jail (which I assure you would happen) is probably not in your child;s best interest.

Just something to chew on.

 

[MinnieTink]

I haven't read this whole thread but got the idea of where it went.... Jeez. Just wanted to say to the OP- I sympathize with you. Kids are kids. The old lady was a dope. I don't feel you were going out of you way to annoy anyone and I certainly don't feel you were trying to say you were "entitled" to wheel your little screetcher around Walmart and too bad if it bothers anyone. I didn't get that at all. I got a mom who got her feelings hurt by some idiot stranger. Best to you girlfriend.....and don't sweat the old bag.

 

[sbell111]

... A bit OT maybe (and this is probably a whole other thread), but what is it about Walmart that makes kids misbehave there? Skimming through the thread, I noticed a whole bunch of comments about how people see this kind of thing happening at Walmart all the time, and that bewilders me. ...

People like to bash WalMart. It's a dis thing.

Here's what happened on my last two visits to WalMart:

Visit 1- I had told my staff that I would treat them to ice cream sundaes. On my way to work, I stopped at WalMart. I ran in and bought a couple tubs of ice cream and a bunch of toppings. It took me all of three minutes. The store was bright and clean. The cashier was nice to me.

Visit 2- At a recent childbirth class, the nurse teaching the class described how to make a homemade heat pack using a tube sock and rice. I was in the neighborhood and had a few minutes to kill, so I popped into WalMart to check out their tube socks. A few minutes later, I had found some pink and purple ones that I thought would make Cathy smile. A few minutes of wandering led me to the baby aisle where I spotted a plush Mickey made just for babies. At eight bucks, I couldn't pass it up. A quick wait behind a couple other people (one of whom offered to let me go ahead of her, but I declined) and I was out of there. The store was an older model, but it was clean and light and the cashier was nice.

I saw no freaks at either store. (OMG! I just realized that this likely means that I WAS the freak.)

But isn't that what you and some of the others are saying? That your (fill in the blank), is more important than someone else's (fill in the blank)?

Don't get me wrong, I understand that hearing a screeching child in a public place is annoying....especially if it appears that the parent is not attempting to control the situation, but there may be things that you or I do in public that is annoying to others around us....and I don't expect them to get in my face and tell me to stop doing whatever it is I'm doing. I probably don't even realize that I'm annoying someone else. I don't go around trying to annoy others in public, but I'm sure I probably have a time or two.

The old adage applies. One person's rights end where another's begins. In other words, the child's freedom to screech ends at the ears of the other people. Conversely, those people mere attempts at shopping posed no real inconvenience to the child.

 

[mill4023]

I'm a little shocked at how many of you think that people should immediately leave the store if their kids are fussy. Are you guys serious?
Sometimes you need to shop with kids, even when they don't really want to be shopping. If the kids starts getting cranky and throwing a tantrum and you immediately leave the store, you're basically teaching them that if they whine and cry when they don't want to do something, they won't have to do it. Seems like a bad message to me.

Not to mention the fact that you might actually be at the store because you need some stuff and just giving up really isn't a good option.

Honestly, we're talking about a Walmart here. If a crying kid is really going to ruin your day, you probably shouldn't be shopping at Walmart. If it really bothers you that much, is it that big of a deal to just go to a different aisle and come back a minute later?

It's not like we are talking about a restaurant, where you are stuck at one table for a long period of time. It's a store. Unless you are following the crying kid around for some reason, you are only going to be near them for a minute.

 

[NHdisneylover]

I'm a little shocked at how many of you think that people should immediately leave the store if their kids are fussy. Are you guys serious?
Sometimes you need to shop with kids, even when they don't really want to be shopping. If the kids starts getting cranky and throwing a tantrum and you immediately leave the store, you're basically teaching them that if they whine and cry when they don't want to do something, they won't have to do it. Seems like a bad message to me.

Not to mention the fact that you might actually be at the store because you need some stuff and just giving up really isn't a good option.

Honestly, we're talking about a Walmart here. If a crying kid is really going to ruin your day, you probably shouldn't be shopping at Walmart. If it really bothers you that much, is it that big of a deal to just go to a different aisle and come back a minute later?

It's not like we are talking about a restaurant, where you are stuck at one table for a long period of time. It's a store. Unless you are following the crying kid around for some reason, you are only going to be near them for a minute.

If you went straight home and let them do what they wanted to I guess you would be. The couple of times I have had to pull my kids out of a store we went and sat in the car, doing nothing whatsoever and being bored (well not me, I got to read, but the misbehaving kid had no such fun) until the child had it under control and then we went back and finished our shopping. The kids knew if they acted up again we would leave again until they were ready to shop and repeat as needed. One of times it took me FOREVR to get my shopping done, BUT it means I now have two kids who behave well in stores. They learend that misbehaving only prolonged the whole shopping experience for them AND that other people have the right to shop without being disturbed by loud/rude people. One of those times was on a supremly cold day in January. Miserable. I cranked the car and ran the heat form time to time and we kept coats and hats on. It was a very big battle of will which I knew I had to win (BTW I fight precious few battles with my kids: but if I do feel it is needed then I stick to my guns).

 

[wvjules]

you folks are all reading into things the op may or may not have said or done at the actually situation

your creating scenarios the original op may or may not have been involved

your surmising the original said this or didn't say that

I say this thread should be closed!!! it has become harsh, mean and caustic and an embarrassment

Maybe if the OP hadn't taken her toys and stormed off then some of these questions would have been answered.

As other PPs have mentioned, she was going for sympathy, IF she were trying to console her DD I'm sure she probably would have mentioned it in atleast of one of her posts.

 

[Scurvy]

I'm a little shocked at how many of you think that people should immediately leave the store if their kids are fussy. Are you guys serious?

I thought I had read the whole thread, but somehow I managed to miss where anyone said that a parent should immediately leave the store if their child gets fussy. I did see where people (myself included) said that if you can't get your child to stop screeching loudly then you need to leave the store, but not where anyone suggested someone do so immediately when a child gets fussy. Maybe I need to go back and re-read the thread. . . unless you are exagerating to make a point. Are you?

If you went straight home and let them do what they wanted to I guess you would be. The ouple of times I have had to pull my kids out of a store we went and sat in the car, doign nothing whatsoever and being bored (well not me, I got to read, but the misbehaving kid had no such fun) until the hcild had it under control and then we went back and finished our shopping. The kids knew if they acted up again we would leave again until they were ready to shop and repeat as needed. Those coupe of times it took me FOREVR to get my shopping done, BUT it means I now have two kids who behave well in stores. They learend that misbehaving only prolonged the whole shopping experience for them AND that other people have the right to shop without being disturbed by loud/rude people. One of those times was on a supremly cold day in January. Miserable. I crank the car and ran the heat form time to time and we kept coats and hats on. It was a very big battle of will which I knew I had to win (BTW I fight precious few battles with my kids: but if I do feel it is needed then I stick to my guns).

You are a good parent. I wish everyone would do this!

 

[just4today]

I thought I had read the whole thread, but somehow I managed to miss where anyone said that a parent should immediately leave the store if their child gets fussy. I did see where people (myself included) said that if you can't get your child to stop screeching loudly then you need to leave the store, but not where anyone suggested someone do so immediately when a child gets fussy. Maybe I need to go back and re-read the thread. . . unless you are exagerating to make a point. Are you?

It would be so much better if people would actually READ what is being written here. Nobody is suggesting that a parent should immediately leave the store when a child is fussy.

 

[mill4023]

If you went straight home and let them do what they wanted to I guess you would be. The ouple of times I have had to pull my kids out of a store we went and sat in the car, doign nothing whatsoever and being bored (well not me, I got to read, but the misbehaving kid had no such fun) until the hcild had it under control and then we went back and finished our shopping. The kids knew if they acted up again we would leave again until they were ready to shop and repeat as needed. Those coupe of times it took me FOREVR to get my shopping done, BUT it means I now have two kids who behave well in stores. They learend that misbehaving only prolonged the whole shopping experience for them AND that other people have the right to shop without being disturbed by loud/rude people. One of those times was on a supremly cold day in January. Miserable. I crank the car and ran the heat form time to time and we kept coats and hats on. It was a very big battle of will which I knew I had to win (BTW I fight precious few battles with my kids: but if I do feel it is needed then I stick to my guns).

Everyone raises their children differently. I tend to believe that "sticking to your guns" means not letting them control your actions. By refusing to stop shopping simply because a child is whining or fussing, you are showing them that they won't get what they want(including attention) by whining and fussing.

But I balance that with trying to be considerate of others. It is very rare for my kids to have a tantrum in a restaurant. In fact, we often get compliments from strangers when we go out to eat. Usually older people who seem surprised that all 5 of our kids(1 to 14) are being good. But when it does happen, I take them out of the restaurant immediately. I don't want to subject other diners, who are trying to have a nice relaxing meal out, to the sound of kids crying or fussing.

But I'm not that concerned with someone having to hear a kid crying for two minutes, while they pass us in the frozen food aisle of Walmart. IMO, that's a lot different than a restaurant situation and anyone who is really that upset about it probably needs to avoid contact with the public in general.

 

[Hazzard101]

I'm assuming, since you said you aren't a parent, that you are coming to this conclusion based on things you have seen on the bus at WDW. I can assure you, not all of us have done this. Maybe you just noticed the ones who did because they were the loudest people there. And I still maintain that the bolded is the most important factor in this thread for some of us. A frazzled parent who is doing the best she can and feels bad for disturbing those around her is very different from a parent who can't be bothered to empathise with those she is subjecting to her screeching child

To clarify, I am a security officer in a school system and DW is a second grade teacher. We are no strangers to raising children and understand the in's and out's of raising children.

We have been to Disney with parents. I was not saying that all parents scream at their kids, what I was getting at is that kids are exhausted and over tired from being at the park and have at one time or the other taken there children out when tired or grumpy. Not all have tantrums. I was making the point that, being Disney people, we deal with a lot worse than the OP's situation when at Disney.

I also speak with the first hand knowledge of rude parents who take no responsibility for the action of their child or make the child take responsibility for themselves (older kids that is, not 2 year old's)

My belief is that many of the adults in this world have somehow gotten it in their heads that the "Me" has become the most important thing on Earth. And the "Others" can exist only if they don't infringe on them. We have forgotten that although people can be rude that is is even worse to be doubly rude and point it out.

In a nutshell, The mother should have made an attempt to hush the child out of respect of others in the area. The lady should have kept her comments to herself. Lastly, The Op should have ignored the old woman and went on with her shopping. We need to try to be the better person in situations like these.

I also understand that it is a hard thing to do when confronted by a tiny brain. Can't we all just get along.

 

[ols386]

People like to bash WalMart. It's a dis thing.

Here's what happened on my last two visits to WalMart:

Visit 1- I had told my staff that I would treat them to ice cream sundaes. On my way to work, I stopped at WalMart. I ran in and bought a couple tubs of ice cream and a bunch of toppings. It took me all of three minutes. The store was bright and clean. The cashier was nice to me.

Visit 2- At a recent childbirth class, the nurse teaching the class described how to make a homemade heat pack using a tube sock and rice. I was in the neighborhood and had a few minutes to kill, so I popped into WalMart to check out their tube socks. A few minutes later, I had found some pink and purple ones that I thought would make Cathy smile. A few minutes of wandering led me to the baby aisle where I spotted a plush Mickey made just for babies. At eight bucks, I couldn't pass it up. A quick wait behind a couple other people (one of whom offered to let me go ahead of her, but I declined) and I was out of there. The store was an older model, but it was clean and light and the cashier was nice.

I saw no freaks at either store. (OMG! I just realized that this likely means that I WAS the freak.)

The old adage applies. One person's rights end where another's begins. In other words, the child's freedom to screech ends at the ears of the other people. Conversely, those people mere attempts at shopping posed no real inconvenience to the child.

We don't live in a perfect world....and sometimes I think we just need to accept that there will be inconveniences in life and we just have to deal with them. And to fuss and whine about it, like some on this thread have done, is pretty sad.

If a child is screeching and crying in a store, and it bothers some, there really isn't anything they can do about it, unless they want to report it to management. Personally, it may annoy me, but it isn't a big enough deal to report it, so I'll just go about my business and try not to be concerned about it, and it if bothers me THAT much, then I can leave the store and come back another time. It isn't the end of my world.

 

[NHdisneylover]

You are a good parent. I wish everyone would do this!

Aw, thanks I have made my share of mistakes too--no doubt that I am NOT a perfect parent

 

[Jennasis]

To clarify, I am a security officer in a school system and DW is a second grade teacher. We are no strangers to raising children and understand the in's and out's of raising children.

We have been to Disney with parents. I was not saying that all parents scream at their kids, what I was getting at is that kids are exhausted and over tired from being at the park and have at one time or the other taken there children out when tired or grumpy. Not all have tantrums. I was making the point that, being Disney people, we deal with a lot worse than the OP's situation when at Disney.

I also speak with the first hand knowledge of rude parents who take no responsibility for the action of their child or make the child take responsibility for themselves (older kids that is, not 2 year old's)

My belief is that many of the adults in this world have somehow gotten it in their heads that the "Me" has become the most important thing on Earth. And the "Others" can exist only if they don't infringe on them. We have forgotten that although people can be rude that is is even worse to be doubly rude and point it out.

In a nutshell, The mother should have made an attempt to hush the child out of respect of others in the area. The lady should have kept her comments to herself. Lastly, The Op should have ignored the old woman and went on with her shopping. We need to try to be the better person in situations like these.

I also understand that it is a hard thing to do when confronted by a tiny brain. Can't we all just get along.

Finally, the voice of reason!

And now, can we just let this monster thread die?

 

[ols386]

Maybe if the OP hadn't taken her toys and stormed off then some of these questions would have been answered.

As other PPs have mentioned, she was going for sympathy, IF she were trying to console her DD I'm sure she probably would have mentioned it in atleast of one of her posts.

So what, alot of people on the dis boards do that.

 

[mill4023]

It would be so much better if people would actually READ what is being written here. Nobody is suggesting that a parent should immediately leave the store when a child is fussy.

I guess that depends on your definition of fussy. When my 1 year old gets fussy, sometimes he screeches. And lots of people suggested that someone should leave the store if their child is screeching.

You shouldn't have dragged her out to Walmart or anywhere else or be prepared for people not appreciating it.

While I would never think of telling someone thier child was a brat, I have to admit that I have been in Wal-Mart with a screechy whiny kid and have thought to myself "Why doesn't that mother take that kid home?".

And no, I don't expect a kid to be perfect, but I do expect that a parent will take control of a situation in the best way possible, which, in this case, probably would not have been by continuing shopping.

So have I. Screeching kids grate on my nerves (I wouldn't get nasty about it though.) And no, mine never did, or we would have left the store.

take children home when they become annoying, this includes teenagers!!!!

Come on people, yes, she was rude but you really should remove your child when they are acting up. Noise polution is really an issue for me too. Unnecessary noise from cranky children really sets some of us off.

And I have to agree, take the kid home or come back later when the kids in a better mood. Yes, I have kids and yes they have had temper tantrums. I have never left them in the store for everyone to continue to hear the results of their tantrum. I remove them from the situation.

Back in the days when our kids acted up in a store, we just left. Many times we just walked away from a full cart. But, they learned that to act up in a store ment we were going home, pronto.

Also, the world does NOT revolve around you and your screeching DD. You should have removed her from the situation.

 

[wvjules]

So what, alot of people on the dis boards do that.

So what nothing. I was just saying that if she were consoling her DD and trying to get her to stop screeching then surely it would have been posted as it would have been to her benefit to mention it.