My daughter won't stop talking!!!

[golfgal]

Occasionally we set a timer for DD and said "you can't talk to me or around me until that goes off". She would usually go to her room then. Hers is a constant barrage of questions so you can't really tune her out, although I do. It does get on your nerves!

 

[Bella the Ball 360]

My ears are bleeding! How do I make her stop????

I know that 10 years from now, I'll wish she was talking to me, but now, I can't do anything without a lengthy, all over the place conversation (one-way) from her. I've tried to play quiet games, set rules (no talking to me while I'm on the phone or in a conversation with another adult), redirected her activities (crafts, electronic games, computer, pretend play) but she just KEEPS TALKING!!

I don't want to punish her, but my patience these days is very thin. I try to tune her out, but she just keeps speaking louder!

And, it's not that I don't pay enough attention to her or don't talk to her enough. I'm always talking with her. There are just some times (when I'm paying bills or on the phone or trying to spend some time with DS) that I need quiet!

Any ideas?

You said it yourself, ten years from now you will miss it. Well that is totally true. Trust me I wish my boys would talk to me even if it is just to say hello! There are lots of worse things than having a chatty kid and I would trade places with you in a heartbeat! Take it with a grain of salt and let her run on ...then when you look back you can say to yourself, "at least I never stopped her when she wanted to talk to me".

 

[Imzadi]

I feel for you. I'm glad you are trying to nip this in the bud now. I run into many adults who have motor mouth & they are very hard to be around & no one wants to work with them. It creates difficulties for these people throughout life.

I think in some people, a lot of it stems from insecurities & the need to be CONNECTED to other people at all times. These people really can't be alone inside themselves - and in SILENCE. They need other people around all the time. And they need to talk to make their presence known, lest they "disappear". Talking is a way to soothe themselves, even though it puts an imposition on others to be polite & listen. This imposition is actually passive aggressive as it abuses other people's politeness to feed their own needs.

In others, it simply is that they weren't taught that not everything they THINK needs to come out of their mouth. They think each thought out loud, even when it has nothing to do with other people. They need to be taught that there is a difference in using words to verbally COMMUNICATE to another person & simply verbally babbling away aloud. That they can talk to themselves, just use their "inside voice."

 

[PooohBear]

yep. I know how you feel ! Mine still talk non stop ! even if I try and clean or do something else to have quiet, I get followed !

 

[golfgal]

You said it yourself, ten years from now you will miss it. Well that is totally true. Trust me I wish my boys would talk to me even if it is just to say hello! There are lots of worse things than having a chatty kid and I would trade places with you in a heartbeat! Take it with a grain of salt and let her run on ...then when you look back you can say to yourself, "at least I never stopped her when she wanted to talk to me".

Spoken like a mom that has never had a motor mouth . When ever I take DD anywhere she literally starts talking before we leave the house and talks NON STOP the entire time we are gone whether is is 15 minutes or 3 hours. It isn't that I don't want to hear what she has to say, it is just the constantness of it. I think kids do need to learn that it isn't acceptable to talk all the time.

At our first parent teacher conference for her in kindergarten the teacher made a comment about how she needs to speak up and talk more in school. We were floored. The teacher is a friend of ours and she KNOWS she talks non stop at home, lol.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I feel for you. I'm glad you are trying to nip this in the bud now. I run into many adults who have motor mouth & they are very hard to be around & no one wants to work with them. It creates difficulties for these people throughout life.

In others, it simply is that they weren't taught that not everything they THINK needs to come out of their mouth. They think each thought out loud, even when it has nothing to do with other people. They need to be taught that there is a difference in using words to verbally COMMUNICATE to another person & simply verbally babbling away aloud. That they can talk to themselves, just use their "inside voice."

Some of what you are saying might be true, at least with some people, but it would do nothing to explain my children. I think a lot of it is the nature of a person.

My oldest talked a lot as a young child, but in general was quite shy around others. Now, as an 18yo, she can sure talk, but is in general on the quiet side.

My 15yo son talks all the time, telling me things that I can't believe he is telling his mother these things. He can be very quiet at school, though, where he is more insecure.

My 12yo is very reserved, to excess. He doesn't talk much to anyone. He's shy with strangers and it's hard for him to mumble the basics, but at home he's too quiet in general. He can talk, but it's almost like he doesn't want to be bothered. Much like my brother was...

My 6yo is the one who I referred to in the earier post. He's not shy with anyone and as irritating as it can be to me personally, I think that he will have the easiest time of my children. He is known by all the kids in his class because he's the first one to see them outside of school and give them a friendly "hi"--my other kids never did this. Jake is very secure with himself.

So some of it may be how we are raising our children, but my 4 are all so different that I know that it has much more to do with the personalities that they are born with.

 

[weare6travelers]

I forgot the best is when she is in opera mode, she sing all her responses

Oh my gosh this made me laugh!! When my now dd13 was little she would do this all day. She talked all the time about anything. She still sings, hums and likes to talk. But know that she is a teenager she is a lot quieter. I kinda miss the days when she would sing "Please give me some juice" in opera mode.

 

[experiment626mom]

I ask my stepdaughter for the short version. Do that a couple of times and she might get the hint.

 

[Froggyswife]

My dd is the same way when she was little and now that she is a teen. I told her since she had so much to say why didn't she write it down .... I bought her a diary as soon as she could write .... Now she has written one book and she is starting a new novel at age 13. I would like to submit it to a publisher but don't really know how to go about it.... any suggestions?

 

[Mom-to-3]

We used to live about 10 minutes from the interstate and I had the rule that DD couldn't start talking until the car was going fast. She would lean forward as we entered the on-ramp and let loose as soon as we were going fast.

3 suggestions:

It is completely OK for anyone to say, "My brain is feeling rattled. I need you to stop talking while I do this task. When I am finished, we can chat. Why don't you go do (some suggestion)? " And stick to it. Don't let her talk in the same room with you.

At several points during the day, sit alone with your child, face to face, knee to knee and give him/her your complete intense attention. Come up with a name for it, eg, ""Knee time." If your child just wants to prattle about nothing and you are trying to do something important, tell him to remember what he wants to say and tell you at Knee time. He could even write it down.

Puppets. But with the emphasis that the puppets are for the player to have fun -- not to command audiences for 10 puppet shows/day.

And yes, years from now you will yearn for the sound of their chatting. Videotape it now.

 

[Ava83]

I kinda miss the days when she would sing "Please give me some juice" in opera mode.

I know I will miss it..my favorite is "Nooooo! I don't have to go potty!"

 

[luvflorida]

He would ask to see inside the houses when we were trick or treating, too.

I like this kid! I'm fifty and I like to see inside people's houses, too. Of course, I wouldn't ask, but I AM curious about how other people live. Okay, I'm just plain nosy!

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I like this kid! I'm fifty and I like to see inside people's houses, too. Of course, I wouldn't ask, but I AM curious about how other people live. Okay, I'm just plain nosy!

Me, too! I loved to see how other people had their houses decorated (always better than mine!).

As much as his constant talking can drive me up a wall, it's the arguing that really makes me crazy. I know I've told this story on the DIS boards, but one night during dinner he said something and I agreed with him. He then went on to argue with me! At least I know that I will one day miss the talking and his humorous take on life, but the arguing--no way!

 

[Lil_Tink]

She will turn out to be just like me

Which I think isn't a bad thing.

 

[Mom-to-3]

Regarding the arguing: Sometimes we have conversations with the rule that you have to find a way to contradict what the previous person said! My kids are really good at it.

 

[Lil_Tink]

Be glad she talks, lol. My brother used to never talk, I was his mouth. I knew what he wanted and was saying and no one else did. Lol. My grandma always yelled" Let him talk" but I was his talker. Now he wont shut up at family events..

Its the quiet ones you gotta watch out for.