My 18yo ds doesn't want to go to his HS Graduation

[flipturngirl]

i would make him go.. it is HS graduation.. and there are people who die to be in his shoes that are in his class.. i do not see why there are people who do not want to walk. just stupid.. in my opinion..

 

[NotUrsula]

I really wanted to skip my own HS graduation, but hadn't planned to. I had had a blisteringly bad migraine for 24 hours at that point, and was sick as a dog. My sister had driven in from out of town to attend, however, and she essentially threatened me with eternal retribution if I didn't make it worth her while, so I went. I'm in about 6 photos from the ceremony in my HS yearbook -- if you look at them it is REALLY obvious that I was ill. As soon as it was over I crawled into bed with an ice pack while my family went out to celebrate. The next day I got on a Trailways bus for college, and I never looked back.

Personally, I'd let him take a pass. Finishing HS is really a relatively basic achievement; these days we take for granted that pretty much everyone will manage to do it. I don't rank a HS graduation as a big deal at all, and I don't see the point of even *having* lower-level "graduations" than that. He may feel embarassed at the idea of making a big deal out of something this basic.

 

[ZephyrHawk]

The answer is simple, the graduation is not just for him. He has parents who sacrificed, who worked hard with him all those years, who paid his way and loved him and were always there for him. They deserve to see him cross the stage in his cap and gown, and clearly they want to. He can consider it his last high school lesson to take with him into adulthood: it's not all about you.

 

[LisaR]

I've got a niece who's in an MD/Ph.D program, another in a Ph.D. program at an Ivy, a third who is senior managment at a major pharmaceutical company at age 28, two nephews with Ph.D.'s in electrical engineering and nanotechnology, and very high paying positions in chip design with IT companies.

Yeah, but just imagine how much better they could have done if they had that coveted private education.

 

[ckay87]

The OP said, her son has to attend the practice which was manditory.
In WI, practice is held during the school day, usually in the morning and graduation is either that evening, or the following Sunday. The practice is probably considered a school day yet. I know it is in my town. After the practice, the Seniors are officially done. So then they have the option of attending the actual graduation or picking up their diploma.

The quote you quoted me on was in response to another poster, not the OP. The other poster stated his student's graduation ceremony itself was mandatory. Which is a crock.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

Private School. The expectations are higher when parents have been shelling out thousands$$ a year for a quality education, I guess.

Today, in public school. it seems parents and kids do what pleases them.

WOW! Seems they teach the kids and the family that they are above everyone else that's not their own kind.

I feel sorry for the kids when they go to the workforce and be with the "normal" people.

 

[RN4Babies]

Private School. The expectations are higher when parents have been shelling out thousands$$ a year for a quality education, I guess.

Today, in public school. it seems parents and kids do what pleases them.

Oh my....I guess a "quality education" doesn't include graciousness or tact.

FYI...my son is graduating from a public school, and so far has been awarded five different scholarships based on his academic record, volunteerism, community service, letters of recommendation from several of his teachers and an essay he wrote for each one (not based on financial need; I earn too much money as a single mom/registered nurse for that ) What seems to please him, much to my delight, is thinking of others first, and making a difference in the world.

 

[MUFFYCAT]

I wonder if I should tell my DD's friend who got a scholarship to Princeton this Fall that she shouldn't even bother.
She's also valedictorian, but I guess that doesn't mean much coming from the public school system.

 

[Pigeon]

WOW! Seems they teach the kids and the family that they are above everyone else that's not their own kind.

I feel sorry for the kids when they go to the workforce and be with the "normal" people.

When you have a trust fund, you don't have to rub shoulders at work with the lower classes.

 

[RN4Babies]

He has said he'll go if I really, really want him to, but as I read the posts here, I find myself wanting to go less and less. All I remember of my high school graduation was that it was unbeliveably boring, and I didn't go to my college graduation (although I did go to my nursing pinning ceremony, which was lovely). I'm thinking maybe a weekend trip to Chicago would be a good idea for us!

 

[daisax]

Let him skip.

And comparing this with bridezillas? You could just as easily compare it to Mother of the Bridezillas, who take over and insist that things be done their way and hold the occasion hostage because of how it will reflect on them and what their dreams have always been, regardless of the desires of the bride and groom. (Not the OP, but responders who feel it's the kid's obligation to provide this for the parents)

He sounds like a fine young man to whom this is a welcome end to a long struggle. He has done his work, achieved his goal, and his greatest reward will be walking away and not looking back.

So take him out to dinner and have a blast.

 

[Serena]

He has said he'll go if I really, really want him to, but as I read the posts here, I find myself wanting to go less and less. All I remember of my high school graduation was that it was unbeliveably boring, and I didn't go to my college graduation (although I did go to my nursing pinning ceremony, which was lovely). I'm thinking maybe a weekend trip to Chicago would be a good idea for us!

sounds like a plan

 

[luvmy3]

Oh my....I guess a "quality education" doesn't include graciousness or tact.

FYI...my son is graduating from a public school, and so far has been awarded five different scholarships based on his academic record, volunteerism, community service, letters of recommendation from several of his teachers and an essay he wrote for each one (not based on financial need; I earn too much money as a single mom/registered nurse for that ) What seems to please him, much to my delight, is thinking of others first, and making a difference in the world.

It sounds like you have raised a wonderful son

 

[MUFFYCAT]

It sounds like you have raised a wonderful son

I agree! You should be very proud of him!

 

[flying_babyb]

I didnt go to my high school graduation and years latter It still dosent matter to me.

 

[HighClass]

The answer is simple, the graduation is not just for him. He has parents who sacrificed, who worked hard with him all those years, who paid his way and loved him and were always there for him. They deserve to see him cross the stage in his cap and gown, and clearly they want to. He can consider it his last high school lesson to take with him into adulthood: it's not all about you.

I agree with this.

Sorry, but I just never heard of skipping the HS Graduation-a proud milestone for the family and the young person.
No one skips at our school, there is no box to check if you want diploma mailed to you. I just find that option peculiar.-but it seems highly popular on this thread.

 

[Cantw8]

i wood rezpond butt commmming from the pubic scool sytem, who carez what i tink

 

[rie'smom]

Op, I you all will enjoy your celebration dinner!!!

Private School. The expectations are higher when parents have been shelling out thousands$$ a year for a quality education, I guess.

Today, in public school. it seems parents and kids do what pleases them.

There were kids at my sons' private schools and boarding schools who chose not to go through the graduation ceremony. Maybe what you meant to say is the schools you're familiar with don't give the students enough credit to make their own decisions about graduation. It's more about how it looks than it is about the student.

When you have a trust fund, you don't have to rub shoulders at work with the lower classes.

We have 3 kids-2 private schooled and 1 public schooled. All 3 are happy and well adjusted. All 3 are successful. All 3 have been taught by us that what matters in a friend is not what they have but who they are as people- are they considerate, are they kind,etc. BTW, my husband and I are both trust fund babies and we practice what we preach. Our friends are all over the socioeconomic ladder.

 

[HighClass]

There were kids at my sons' private schools and boarding schools who chose not to go through the graduation ceremony..

There are Boys Boarding schools in louisiana?

 

[rie'smom]

There are Boys Boarding schools in louisiana?

No there aren't any that I know of but he went to school at St. Stanislaus in Bay St. Louis, MS.
There is a girl's boarding school, Academy of the Sacred Heart at Grand Coteau ,LA where we considered sending our daughter but she wanted to attend the local public high school instead.