Most awkward moments you have had at funerals?

[Spinneret]

Can be anything

 

[nw6675]

My first funeral I attended was when I was 11 for my best friend's mom who died unexpectedly in her sleep. I was considered part of the family so rode in the limo, sat with them, etc. I'm sure many at that time wondered who the little white girl was with the family since I was the only attendee who was white.

I often wonder what happened to her since she moved out of state after. She was such a great friend.

 

[amcnj]

The clearly and visibly distraught father of a brutally murdered co-worker, approached me at the service, thanked me for coming, then proceeded to go into some detail about what had happened to his child.

All the while another of his children, a youngish special needs adult, was next to him, listening and trying to hold themselves together during it all. As was I.

 

[MinnieFan4ever]

This was several years ago. Actually, several decades ago at my grandpas funeral. I was sitting with my brother and cousins during the service and someone behind us was on an oxygen machine And you could really hear it. One of my cousins whispers…Luke, I am your father. We all lost it trying not to laugh. From behind it looked we were all crying, which we all were earlier. To this day when I hear an oxygen machine it brings me back to that memory.

 

[loves to dive]

My brother and I had to get up real early and drive 3 hours to north Ga. for my granddaddy's funeral. As a result, we didn't eat breakfast. My stomach growled very loudly through the whole funeral. This got my brother, cousin and I to giggling. Not so much awkward for us but Granny sure was mad as a hornet. We pretty much giggled through the entire thing anyway since the preacher was going on about how Granddaddy was so proud of his 3 grandchildren. Obviously, he didn't know him at all since he had 9 grandkids. All us kids in my family were left out. My aunt-in-law was sobbing and going on as loud as she could, even though she and my uncle had been divorced for years. Then at the graveyard it was a cold wet day and the plot was sort of up a hill. Granny had picked the largest men/boys in the family to carry the casket (not either of my cousins or my brother). They slipped and slid all the way and, alas yes they dropped it. We giggled through that too. My granddaddy had the best sense of humor and he would have found the whole situation down right funny.

 

[superme80]

My grandparent's neighbor passed away. We had grown up with him, so we went to the funeral. It was our first Catholic Funeral. The priest kept using his birth name instead of his nickname, My sister and I thought we were at the wrong funeral. We started giggling, and my mom was furious. We giggled about it for years.

 

[RogueX]

A lot of them it seems.

My coworkers mother had died after several months of fighting kidney cancer. Everyone that I'm friends and family know that I don't go into churches, but I had been working with her for many years at that point and she was very close to her mom.

I arrived at the church and noticed she wasn't crying, was holding herself together...until she saw me. Suddenly the tears are all over the place and she's leaning on me, sobbing and saying "you actually came". It took 15 minutes, but I got her settled down.

Now, the next awkward moment was at my stepmother's mother's funeral. My estranged stepbrother, his wife and their son showed up to the church, even though they refused to even communicate with his own mother. They showed up wearing dirty sweatshirts and sweatpants. At the reception my stepbrother was trying to play nice to his uncle who was most likely the executor of the estate.

When I turned and noticed I was near the wife, I said a bit louder than intended that I needed vodka. Well, unfortunately my glass of vodka was too close to my glass of water and I accidentally chugged a very large amount of vodka. On a good note, it helped distract my stepmother from watching her son talk to everyone but her.

 

[cjlong88]

My mom passed in 2020. One year later my grandma passed. At my grandmother's funeral my dad tried to surprise introduce me to his new girlfriend. Super uncomfortable.

Homeboy didn't realize that funerals are not the time nor the place for stuff like that!

 

[DisneyHardin]

At the funeral for one of my good friends' father-in-law, her sister in law and longtime boyfriend stood in front of the casket and got married by the same pastor doing the funeral.

 

[HopperFan]

My Grandmother passed in her home state, had a funeral there (my Mom & her brother traveled there for it). I was expecting and did not travel there. I traveled to the other side of my state where she was being buried to be at the graveside service with family that lived there. It was done by a minister she knew, she lived there most her life.

As he spoke he said "I remember Rebecca as a boy." Wording and inflection are everything. And to think of my prim & proper dress wearing grandmother as a boy just started the giggles, even my Mom. I think it was something that let the stress go. I don't think the minister even realized what he said.

~~~

FIL was buried in a National Cemetery. They have these outdoor chapels spread around as they roll 3 funerals at a time. Across from our "chapel" was a section that had smaller headstones and they were placed very close together, like maybe 3 feet head to toe. I could see several of the nephews looking, talking and acting funny. I walked over to see what they were saying and they looked at me and said "Is that section just for "little people" ........... ......... no boys they are cremated remains there. These boys were all adults, young adults but really that was their first thought?

~~~

MIL's someone decided without input to have a dove release after the church funeral. Everything was running late because MIL arrived late. I know many do these and we only see the wonderful videos and photos but ......... not something I'd repeat. They rushed to get it done because our time was about up, hustled all the immediate family, grands etc to an arch and began running around handing birds to people ... several of them afraid of birds, some just didn't want to hold a bird. There were a few squeals & screams, some let go immediately, some didn't hear the lady give the nod ... there were just these doves taking off all over the place. They are supposed to fly in a circle over us and these birds were done with us and headed straight home. I wish we had video. All I kept thinking was I hope they get home and not hit by a car they were so confused.

~~~

When FIL passes there was already a HUGE family reunion planned that was very far from where we live. Most that family couldn't travel here for a funeral so it was important to them to do another in the town in which he grew up. They planned a BIG lovely event, had us bring special items of his to put on the alter since he wasn't there and we ALL traveled there. Well one sibling decided to extend their vacation/cross country trip and show up the day AFTER the funeral. So when we walked in to the funeral it was awkward and GLORIOUS that they set aside seating for them on the front row making their absence very obvious. After there was a big reception and all the town's people, relatives from there etc all came ... and they all knew his one child opted to not attend even though they were coming for the reunion part. I only wished I had thought of it.


I have found funerals to either be normal boring sad events OR a bit off full of awkward moments.

 

[nw6675]

Homeboy didn't realize that funerals are not the time nor the place for stuff like that!

All the better because of "homeboy".

 

[tvguy]

My mom passed in 2020. One year later my grandma passed. At my grandmother's funeral my dad tried to surprise introduce me to his new girlfriend. Super uncomfortable.

Homeboy didn't realize that funerals are not the time nor the place for stuff like that!

Well, the reality is there are people who go to funerals looking to find a date.

As a former co-worker put it, "funerals are an odd human ritual"

 

[BlueStarryHat]

This one was alllll me. My aunt took my late Mom's shoes after her viewing was over. No, I still don't know why she chose to do this, but we all got a laugh out of it. The shoes sit under the Christmas tree that stays up in our basement. Anyway, that's not the anecdote, but it explains it.

My uncle Charlie died in 2009, and we were all sitting at his viewing catching up with each other, making dumb jokes to lighten the mood, and laughing. The room was very loud. This is how my family operates. So my aunt mentions the shoe incident and we all laugh. Then I say, loudly to be heard over the din, "Hey, Uncle Charlie's wearing wingtips. You want 'em?" I had just gotten out the beginning of that sentence when the room suddenly hushed, and I couldn't stop the rest of it falling out of my mouth. So, the entire room, plus the priest who had held his hand up for silence, heard me exclaim, "Uncle Charlie's wearing wingtips! You want 'em!?" Mortified doesn't begin to cover it.

 

[mumto3girls]

At the funeral for one of my good friends' father-in-law, her sister in law and longtime boyfriend stood in front of the casket and got married by the same pastor doing the funeral.

This gets my vote for most awkward. As I read this I found myself hoping that the couple was trying to make the deceased (father of the bride?) a part of their wedding and not just looking for a twofer since the pastor was already there.

 

[Kathryn Merteuil]

I will never forget what happened several years ago at a visitation. My ex-husband's aunt passed away (she was probably 80-something). The funeral home was in a town, a good 45 minutes away. Since my ex's sister and her husband were also going to go, we rode with them to the funeral home.

While standing in line, the deceased's son saw us, and started yelling at us. You could say he "invited us to leave immediately". He phrased it a little less politely of course. We did not know (until the son announced it to everybody within earshot right there in the funeral home) that my sister in-law had borrowed money from the deceased and never paid her back. He was very angry.

I felt soooooooo embarrassed. I was like OMG.... I didn't say any words, but I was trying my best to be invisible and getting the heck out of there.

In case you were wondering....he was being truthful. She didn't even deny doing this, she just gave excuses for not paying her back. She had also stolen from her mother, my ex, she had "borrowed"from me and never paid me back completely.

 

[RUDisney]

My grandfather couldn't hear well and refused to wear hearing aids. At my GM's funeral, he announced, in front of her casket, that any woman who wanted him, could come and get him since he was now single. My Dad quickly told him that this wasn't the time or place.

Background story... my GF was a very handsome man until he died in his mid-90s. When he was president of a church group, some of the widows would come to my GM to ask if they could "borrow" him for an afternoon since they no longer had a husband. She would emphatically remind them that he was her husband and they didn't swing. These women were not looking for a handyman to help with chores... ahem...

 

[DisneyHardin]

This gets my vote for most awkward. As I read this I found myself hoping that the couple was trying to make the deceased (father of the bride?) a part of their wedding and not just looking for a twofer since the pastor was already there.

I think it was a being aware of mortality things. The sister in law and boyfriend had been together for years and years and never married.

 

[HopperFan]

As a former co-worker put it, "funerals are an odd human ritual"

And why in writing I am telling my people - I DON'T WANT ONE. Don't waste one cent on something like this. Take the family to Disney World.

 

[Forevermarypoppins]

Funerals are stressful and can bring out the worst.
I've seen 2 events that were just plain sad.
One, a huge fight between wife of decreased service member and his parents whom lived 1000+ miles away. Re: Wife was having him buried where her and her son lived and not 1000+ away.
Two, during Covid and the whole mask thing with so much paranoia that daughter (and her entire family )of deceased didn't even show up at the funeral luncheon. Never said a word at the funeral home to maybe 3/4 persons. (I am a relative)

 

[JLTraveling]

My mom passed away in New Orleans, and we had a small meaningful funeral here. But my dad wanted my mom's family to also have a funeral, and of course they wanted a burial (mom was cremated) so we traveled to FL with some of her ashes in a burial box. At the graveside service, my uncle was suddenly falling all over himself to be super nice to my dad and me (we were estranged for a long time). And he insisted on sitting with us during the service. It only came out after the fact that he (huge ex-Marine) was assigned to "guard duty" to make sure neither of us said or did anything embarrassing during the funeral! Um, what? The only embarrassing thing was the preacher who had never met my mom getting every single thing about her wrong. Not the most pleasant day.