moochie neighbor

[disneygal2007]

I can't believe some people. I think the only thing I have ever asked to borrow from someone was motrin. I then went out and bought them a new bottle. I don't mind lending things out, but when it becomes a habbit and exspected it makes me so angry. Don't take kindness for weakness.

 

[crisi]

OMG!!!

College was the worst for this. I know there were times i forgot to pay someone back but I like to think I did something for them that lessened my debt to them, but I was the 'rich' roommate. Meaning i worked 2 full time jobs during the summer for my expenses (parents did pay for my tuituion and rent) and i budgeted. So becuase i was precieved as the one with money people felt they could borrow cds without asking, try to get my to pay for meals etc. the straw that broke the camel's back was i had purchased a CD for a friend at another schoo. I left it in my room, in the bag, under my bed. well, when i got home from class my roommate had opened it and was playing it. I was so pissed and when i told her it wasn't for me that it was a gift she meekly put it back in the case and gave it back. didn't offer any apology or anything. our relationship was never the same and we didn't live together again.

Lara

Shortly after college I was the one with a real job- and a real mortgage. The job wasn't great. I sure wasn't making a lot of money and it was a struggle to pay the bills each month. I was at a friends where an acquaintance was wearing a great pair of boots. Boots I'd never be able to afford with my obligations. At least $100 worth of boots. Back then (even now) a lot of money. I complimented them and was told they were new

Less than a week later I was hit up by a friend. This girl couldn't make her rent. Hadn't made it in a few months and was going to be evicted unless she could come up with this months rent. Since I was so well off, would I pay her rent.

My answer would be starred out, so I won't bother to type it

 

[timmac]

DxW and I (when we were still married) lived next door to some "interesting" neighbors, much like you describe. I've since moved out, and DxW has actually moved to the house next door--which used to be her mother's, so she's now two doors down from this family. A little more distance, but still plenty close for the kids to come by and visit. It's a woman, her mother, and her three daughters. It's clear that soemthing isn't quite right, though nobody knows exactly what specific issues.

Now, the younger two of the daughters would frequently be over to play with our kids who were similar in age. Sometimes even the oldest one would play as well. Inevitably, multiple times per week, it seemed like they mysteriously came around to play not long before dinnertime. And, you guessed it, they hadn't eaten dinner yet. Feeling bad for the kids (and knowing there was something up with the mother) we'd occasionally "invite" them to stay for dinner. Though on one occasion, when the youngest called home to see what time dinner would be, she got off the phone and told me, "Oh, my mom asked if I could just eat dinner here?" That was about the last time, and when we started sending them home before we'd even start cooking anything.

Now, apparently I hear that it's mostly the oldest daughter and mother doing much of the mooching. Asking for rides, because her vehicle is always "getting fixed", and the like. And apparently, the oldest daughter is over a lot to "hang out", but in the process "borrows" cigarettes; DxW also highly suspects that's she's swiped some prescription drugs, and her engagement ring. Impossible to prove, of course, but none of them have been allowed to "hang out" ever since the above went missing, of course.

 

[POOHsie]

Speaking of the outside water faucets, when we lived in Florida we were in a development of semi-detached homes that shared one common wall. We were on a corner lot. My DH, a very fastidious retired Sergeant Major, borrowed a pressure washer from the HOA and cleaned the sidewalks from our side yard facing one street, across our front yard facing another street, to the end of the front yard of the neighbor next door. Even though we had never met our neighbors, this is the kind of nice thing my DH was known for.

It wasn't long after that, that this neighbor accused my DH of running up her water bill by claiming he had attached the pressure cleaner to her outside faucet to do the work! Turned out someone at her house had left their side yard hose on for a whole month, and they had a bill for over $900. So she was trying to blame it on my DH, and stick us with the bill. I should point out that pressure cleaners use water thru tiny holes. They're about water pressure, not water volume. We ignored her accusation and the issue went away. BTW, the water bill we got for the time of the pressure cleaning, was no different than any other month's water bill.

 

[poohfriend77]

OP, I am glad you put a stop to it.
As I was reading all these posts I was thinking...wow...no one every borrows things from us then I was like..hey...they did (or used to). DD's old bff lives across the street and her mom used to borrow DH. DH is a computer guy. So he has spent hours over there cleaning up virus's from their computer due to the usage of their teen son. He warned them about it, and it happened again, and again. They once asked what restaurant DH liked, so I figured hey...they eant to get him a giftcard. Well nothing ever showed up. Now during this time period DH was self employed and he charged 40.00/hour for these services. Now the parents new this.

Needless to say I put my foot down. Whenever they would ask I would say, DH is busy working and gets home to late, and would repeat as needed. They finally got the hint when I saw the Geek Squad car in front of their house.

Now, his parents to it all the time to him and his brother...but they are parents so what are you going to do. My brother also did for my DN usually, but sometimes for his computer. It go to the point if we went over there for a bbq or party I said DH was sick, since everytime DH walked through the door, he was asked to work on a computer. I got PO'd. The straw that broke the camels back was when we were there sitting Shiva for our eldest brother. I mean seriously?? I really would like to have my DH sitting next to me and not in the basement for 4 hours!

Now my DH tells them to drop the cpu at the house and he will get to it when he can!!

Luckily there is an appropriate amount of borrowing/loaning going on in our neighborhood.

The computer stuff is very familiar. When we were first married, we lived across the street from an older Vietnamese couple. They found out DH was a computer guy and asked for help a couple times. He would usually catch DH when he was doing yardwork or something, so I would be searching all over for him, not knowing he had gone into their house. But they ALWAYS repaid him in the most awesome homemade eggrolls a day or two later.

A couple weeks after our DD was born, the guy asked DH for help with something. DH went over and was gone for about an hour. In the meantime, the wife saw me come out or go into the house with the baby carrier. They hadn't realized that I had the baby. DH said the wife started yelling at her husband to stop bugging my DH, when he had a new baby at home. She was so embarrassed, although DH really didn't mind helping (since it was not an every-week thing). The next day, she showed up on our doorstep, apologizing again, and delivered dinner plus an armload of really nice baby gifts. We weren't expecting anything in return, but it was a really nice gesture.

 

[Donnainnj]

Also have a computer guy DH, I feel your pain.

OP, I am glad you put a stop to it.
As I was reading all these posts I was thinking...wow...no one every borrows things from us then I was like..hey...they did (or used to). DD's old bff lives across the street and her mom used to borrow DH. DH is a computer guy. So he has spent hours over there cleaning up virus's from their computer due to the usage of their teen son. He warned them about it, and it happened again, and again. They once asked what restaurant DH liked, so I figured hey...they eant to get him a giftcard. Well nothing ever showed up. Now during this time period DH was self employed and he charged 40.00/hour for these services. Now the parents new this.

Needless to say I put my foot down. Whenever they would ask I would say, DH is busy working and gets home to late, and would repeat as needed. They finally got the hint when I saw the Geek Squad car in front of their house.

Now, his parents to it all the time to him and his brother...but they are parents so what are you going to do. My brother also did for my DN usually, but sometimes for his computer. It go to the point if we went over there for a bbq or party I said DH was sick, since everytime DH walked through the door, he was asked to work on a computer. I got PO'd. The straw that broke the camels back was when we were there sitting Shiva for our eldest brother. I mean seriously?? I really would like to have my DH sitting next to me and not in the basement for 4 hours!

Now my DH tells them to drop the cpu at the house and he will get to it when he can!!

 

[Zim]

Wow, this thread brings back memories. We rented the top half of a two story house / shack in a wooded mountain area. Short of a couple "hellos" and generic conversations we barely ever saw the couple living below us. Except for the time she brought my car's side mirror up to me saying it must've been the wind, she "found" it on the ground.... Because wind can rip three bolts out of the side of a car, right.

So I was shocked when they caught us on our way upstairs one day to ask us if we'd be the best man and matron of honor in their wedding! At first I was speechless, but then it was no trouble at all to say no, thank you. I couldn't even begin to imagine the expectations they'd put on two essentially complete strangers for their wedding day! No regrets there...

 

[disykat]

ARGH! It keeps double posting when I try to edit!

 

[disykat]

I don't have a borrowing problem with neighbors, but a friend of mine did. The kids used to ask her to borrow things all the time AND steal food from her garden. From what she could tell, money didn't seem to be the issue.

One place I lived, I had a "begging" problem. I honestly believed they weren't feeding their kids and so did my roommates. We were all approached by the kids for food - and they weren't asking for cookies! They always wanted a sandwich or some soup. We only gave them food if we were pretty sure the parents weren't around because we were afraid they'd get beaten.
We called CPS numerous times and even the police until they eventually moved. It was so sad. I still wonder about those kids sometimes and if we did enough. We didn't even ever invite them in because they seemed to have bugs, but we would sit with them on our stoop and chat over a snack. I can't remember the names of the kids, but I remember the names their dad used to scream at them.

 

[kathmzh]

OP I feel your pain, I had a neighbor like this, jars of peanut butter, laundry detergent, eggs by the dozen...funny story...she called me to ask for old clothes because her son was in a play. I thought really, you don't even have any old clothes? But I sent over an old plaid shirt of my son's. I asked the litte boy, so what's the play? "Stone Soup" -- the one where all the villagers chip in to make a pot of soup.
I then bet myself $1 million they'll be back for an onion or potato in a couple of weeks...and I won! He came to my door for a potato three weeks later. I should have gotten an invite to the play.

 

[TDC Nala]

After sending her off she came back and said her mom asked if I could run to the store since she needed something printed before tommorrow.

Uh, no. That's nuts. She can take her kid to the library...do libraries have printers? Or a Kinkos or something. And as for saying the OP can afford it because she doesn't have kids...since when is it the OP's duty to provide for the neighbor's kids, to the point where she's expected to run out and buy something the neighbor's kids need? I'm in agreement, it should all stop there.

I have co-workers who borrow stamps from me because they know I have stamps, but they pay for the stamps, so I suppose I should say they BUY stamps from me.

 

[Eastern]

I had a neighbor like that. She would borrow celery, a couple eggs, cream of tartar, shallots, fresh ginger, I always had everything she needed! But I would call once in a blue moon for a cup of regular old sugar: 'sorry, I'm all out'.

I eventually moved.

 

[marthachick]

We lived across from a divorcee (taboo in the mid-70's) and she was a little out there. She used to have men friends who came frequently. My Mom was always very meek and quiet.

The divorcee came to our house and wanted to borrow a blank check once. She was "going to just mark out your name & bank numbers and write min on it & use it." And she didn't even use the same bank we did. Oh, she assured my Mom, "I've done it before with other people's checks & it worked just fine." Um, yeah lady, I bet it did. She was pretty insistant, but my Mom stood her ground.

After that, she wasn't as friendly or didn't try to borrow stuff.

 

[Mickeyflower]

YIPES! Makes me LOVE my neighbors even more now!

I can't believe someone would beg a $20 off of a neighbor you barely knew! Even the homeless in San Francisco won't do that!

I did have a roommate who wanted to charge me to print one 10 page research paper in college (20 cents per page). I was funding my own way through college, my parents couldn't afford to buy me a computer, and I sure couldn't afford one. Her parents paid for her college, gave her a monthly "fun money" account, and paid all her other expenses. My other roommate gasped at her and said "You can print all you want on my computer, I'll even let you type"

I once had another roommate who took a pair of brand new short-alls-yes short-alls they were IN STYLE, that I hadn't worn yet. She BLED IN THEM AND HUNG THEM BACK IN MY CLOSET!!!!! Ya, I lost it on her a WEEEEEE BIT![/QUOTE]

OMG!!!

College was the worst for this. I know there were times i forgot to pay someone back but I like to think I did something for them that lessened my debt to them, but I was the 'rich' roommate. Meaning i worked 2 full time jobs during the summer for my expenses (parents did pay for my tuituion and rent) and i budgeted. So becuase i was precieved as the one with money people felt they could borrow cds without asking, try to get my to pay for meals etc. the straw that broke the camel's back was i had purchased a CD for a friend at another schoo. I left it in my room, in the bag, under my bed. well, when i got home from class my roommate had opened it and was playing it. I was so pissed and when i told her it wasn't for me that it was a gift she meekly put it back in the case and gave it back. didn't offer any apology or anything. our relationship was never the same and we didn't live together again.

Lara

She never had to share anything her entire life, and was not a fan of sharing anything. Personally, I didn't perceive her as "rich" just wicked stingy We are still good friends today, and she has since admitted her stinginess "flaw".

Between her and I we had well over 200 VHS tapes. After we lent out a couple that never returned, one night we sat down with a sharpie & wrote our names all over them. Next time someone borrowed one, we took either their room key, or their food card to insure the video's return! We never lost one after that! Weird

 

[superme80]

All these stories make me I had a roommate that used to borrow my stuff all the time. She would eat all our food and use all of our tolitries. When we ran out it was our fault? She was livid when I made her replace stuff she had used up, "But its so expensive!" she would whine. Uh yeah that is why I bought enought to last me a few months. I am paying everything on my own; you are the one who has parents paying your rent, tuition, credit cards, and still giving you spending money. Stop complaining and fork over the $6 tampons!

 

[hereyago]

lol, first I would have told the kid to emailed to office depot and print it there for 10 cents.

I have learned something new with the above, which I thank you for because you never know when the crazy printer(which I have one of those) will decide not to work. DD13 can email her school work if the printer is down, but if it's a project, not so much.

 

[scbelleatheart]

These stories are why I am glad I don't have many neighbors in close proximity.
When we moved into our house last year internet was impossible to get but we had to have it so we cut down several trees and had the dish positioned high on a tower. It wasn't cheap! About a week later the people across the road came over and said they could pull our wireless router. Could I please give them our access code?
They have since come over several times to see if we would hire him at our business. They also must watch out the window constantly because they mention which direction we leave the driveway and ask where we went. We're back off of the road and you can't see our house because of trees. When our drive gets blacktopped in the spring we are putting up two electric gates and an intercom at the end of each side of the drive. No more visits!

 

[wtrmlnlabs]

Also have a computer guy DH, I feel your pain.

I guess I should be thankful. DH is not only a computer guy, but a "he can (truly) fix anything" guy, but not "official". I bought him one of those T-shirts, it's says "RELAX, I can fix it". So when I have friends, or my sister, with broken computers, appliances, whatever, I have offered to see if DH can help, but they always go for the expensive repairman. This thread makes me think I should be glad I have decided to quit offering!

 

[hereyago]

hey also must watch out the window constantly because they mention which direction we leave the driveway and ask where we went. We're back off of the road and you can't see our house because of trees. When our drive gets blacktopped in the spring we are putting up two electric gates and an intercom at the end of each side of the drive. No more visits!

They are creepers!

 

[phred52]

huh. I've been reading this entire post with my jaw hanging open. I just can't believe the nerve of some people!

In my neighborhood, borrowing is rare but does happen once a year or so. If I give a neighbor a cup of sugar or an egg or two .. the next day a paper plate with a dozen cookies magically appears. That's just how it works on our street.

Once .... many moons ago a 13 year old neighbor girl ~ 5 or 6 houses down~ rang the doorbell 10 minutes after the school bus (my dd's were on) went by. She was trying not to cry & asked politely if I could drive her to school. ( +2 miles) I threw on a bathrobe and off we went. She thanked me profusely and told me she overslept all the while wiping away tears. Never happened again, but for the next couple of years every time I drove by that house and the kids were out.. I'd get BIG smiles and waves.

I