Moms with boys..a moment of your time please

[poohandwendy]

I think it is important for parents to allow their children to be individuals. That means letting them decide for themselves what activities they try and become passionate about. I don't see anything wrong with a boy being involved in dance/ballet, but I would hope any child would be involved in an activity because it was their passion, not their parents.

 

[TheOtherVillainess]

I think it is important for parents to allow their children to be individuals. That means letting them decide for themselves what activities they try and become passionate about.

Amen to that! With me and DSis Lizzie, my mom kinda let us just drift along..didn't 'make' us participate in anything but didn't really care what we were interested in either. My brother she pushed into soccer and football for years until he got into high school and told her basically to stuff it, he wasn't doing it anymore.

I don't want to do that to DS when the time comes. If, like his mother, he is passionate about cartoons, Disney, dancing and heavy metal hair bands...so be it. But if he likes classical music and is into stuff I don't like or understand..well..as long as it's not harmful to him or someone else or illegal...that's his choice and I'll respect it. After all, I was (and still am) into things my mother hates and doesn't understand and she's NEVER respected me for my choices. Ever.

TOV

 

[Cosmic_Charlie]

Perhaps he can get a gig on "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy 2024"

 

[LisaTx]

Originally posted by Christine
I'm sure he would love dance, but he is way to self-conscious about the "girly" thing, but if we had started him earlier, he might have really given it a try.

That's what I would recommend as far as dance. Let him take a class at age 3 or 4. If he likes it, he'll continue. Once they get to school age, there would be more peer pressure about the "girly" aspect. I find it funny though. The "macho" boys tease the "girly" boys about dance, yet the "girly" boys are the ones spending their time with a room full of athletic, half-dressed girls, while the football players are out on the field patting each other on the butt.

I doubt you'll have any trouble finding stuff for your ds to do. Most parents I know have to limit their kids activites. Just let him try lots of different things when he's younger. He'll let you know where his interests lie.

 

[Cruisin]

My daughter is 17 and is a dancer. She is taking from a teacher who has about a dozen or so male dancers. 8 or 9 of those male dancers are older teenage boys.

These boys are involved in all areas of dance, jazz, tap, ballet and hip hop classes. Some of those guys are big beefy guys, so I don't think they have to take too much ribbing about being dancers.

It probably helps that the dance teacher is young, about 23 years old, so she relates well to teenagers.

I agree that you should maybe try putting your son in a dance class when he is 3 - 5 years old and see if he likes it or not. If he does then he will be in before the teasing ages start and if he doesn't like it, then you have given him the opportunity to try it.

 

[shortbun]

Teach your DS to be what he wants to be and how to deal with
people who stereotype. I suggest you try to put yourself in a more positive place about him getting teased; it's going to happen no matter what he does. He needs to know that home is
a safe place, no sexists judgements there and you need to make
sure his teachers, coaches, ministers, friends and family members
know that pushing the "BOY CODE" is not ok. Boys need mentors
who keep them safe and free of sterotyping and bullying. If you
work at this, maybe your son can be one of the leaders and show
the other kids that this type of thinking and bullying is not cool.
Start reading now. Raising Cain and Real Boys are two good books you can start with. Good luck. My DS is 9, took gymnastics and ballet, plays chess competitively, is an honor student, a student leader, travels with a soccer team and also
loves and plays team basketball and football. The girls all love
him because he's not afraid to admit he likes pink and trys out
for all the school plays as well as writes poetry. We worked hard at finding emotionally safe coaches, leading teachers and assuring
DS that he could do whatever he wanted to do including having
a purple bike!!! LOL Have fun with your baby! Cherish every minute; they are 9 before you know it.

 

[shortbun]

Originally posted by spagheddie
As a father of a soon to be 2yo, if he came to me and said,
"I gotta dance", I'd help him start. That being said, I wouldn't push him in that direction. My interests are sports and music and he loves to play ball and make noises with my guitar.

I'll admit I'm probably hypocritical on this subject. We've given him a kitchen to play with and will be getting him a toy vacuum for his birthday, toys that are traditionally marketed to girls. At the same time I wouldn't be thrilled with him playing with Barbie.

Cultivate your son's interests. If it happens to be dance that's great. Will he be made fun of? Probably, but who here hasn't been made fun of at one time or another. As long as he has a great family and friends he'll overcome it and hopefully be very successful.

You sound like a great Dad! If I had a daughter, I'd try to avoid Barbie but....DS really liked that Tarzan doll. He had a baby doll
when he was 2 and 3 too. Gotta teach them how to care for
others at an early age or they will think it's not their job.

 

[janette]

The studio my DD attends has more boys than most studios. I've heard the guys love it, the ratio of girls / boys is great and they are usually very athletic. Some of them play football too, the cost for boys is less and they don't require as many custumes.

 

[dina7]

T-Ball was great for our oldest son when he was in Kindergarten and he was even in a soccer league when he was 4. It was so adorable. And none of the children had any special talent for soccer, it was just for fun. Even more fun for my son since myDH coached soccer and t-ball.