Mom angst

[Pidge]

Our family cruise is coming up soon on DCL and my teenage daughter, who went with just me on the Wonder last year was adamant about not going this time. She's a shy kid and didn't want to go to the Teen Clubs or make friends and basically was bored out of her skull. I agreed she could stay home and made arrangements for our in-laws to stay with her. So why am I feeling horrible about leaving her behind? I keep telling myself this is what she wants, but as a Mom, not having my whole gang on this trip doesn't feel right. I need a major attitude adjustment fast as the rest of my family has anxiously awaited this trip for some time and I don't want to be the big sadsack making everyone else miserable!

 

[kristieuk]

I suppose your reaction is perfectly understandable, but I'm sure it's not warranted. Has your daughter had any second thoughts or is she happy to stay home?


At the end of the day, you have taken the course that keeps everyone happy, and you should never feel bad about that.

We are all different, and just because your daughter doesn't share the rest of your family's idea of a good time doesn't mean you should all miss out. I'm sure it would have been worse taking a sulky unhappy teenager with you!

Just go and have a wonderful time, and don't feel guilty!

I hope it all works out for you.

 

[TJHutch]

I know exactly what you are going through and I feel your pain. My 2dd's could not join us on our last cruise. They are teenagers and could not miss a week of school and it was our anniversary. 1dd would not go even if we had offered. The other dd wanted to go. If you make her go against her wishes she may make the vacation miserable for everyone else (been there done that).
Bring her back some souveniers and maybe when you return and she hears how much fun you all had she will go on the next one. We have scheduled a surprise cruise in September and cannot wait for our dd's reaction when we pull up to the port. Try not to feel too guilty and enjoy your vacation.

 

[nluvwithmickey]

I know what you mean....Altough my DD almost 13 when we will cruise tried to convince us she didn't want to go and stay with my in-laws, I convinced her to try it once and see for herself.

She doesn't like to mix with other teens ( she mostly speaks french ) and she is unusually shy. But what I think worries her is the plane ( she didn't like it when we went to WDW in 2004).

I have booked a cruise for us in 2006. and we will see how the plane ride goes this summer when we go to WDW. If she still doesn't like it, well I might cancel before it is too late and just go with DH and other DD.

I think that she would still enjoy the experience, what I am also worried about is the motion sickness affecting her and freaking her out. She doesn't like the motion simulator rides at WDW.

I understand how you feel about leaving her behind, I felt the same way when my DD did not want to come at first. I tried to explain to her that this might be one of our last trips as a family before she gets a summer job and then HAVE TO stay behind. At first she did not mind at all staying with her grandparents, and then started to figure out all the fun things she'd miss out on while we would be having fun....she decided to give it a try.

I will see how the plane rie goes this summer and then we will decide together if she still wants to come along for our cruise in 2006. I might just have to make a hard decision and leave her behind if this is what she wants. It is very hard not feeling guilty at these times....

 

[BethC1952]

Don't forget that the DD staying home will have a great time with her grandparents! It's a one-on-one time for them with her, too.

Don't feel guilty. It actually sounds like everyone is getting just the vacation they want!

Beth

 

[LAMPSKIES]

Pidge, I can't believe your DD doesn't want to sail........My DDs are 15 and 12 and we have sailed 4 times and they can't wait to go again!! I actually booked a "beaches" vacation and they were upset that we weren't sailing again!!! I book them their own room and get the unlimited internet package and give them the KTTW card with charging privilidges and let them vacation.......

 

[daisy112878]

Wow, when I was a teenager and didn't want to go on vacation my parents put my butt on the plane anyways. I didn't ever have a choice. But I always was fine once I got there. You shouldn't worry. It was her choice and she has to live with that going. I'm sure yall will have a great time anyways.