MIL vent

[Freyja]

"D"MIL came for a short visit yesterday. She lives a 6 hour drive away but was here for a seminar and came over for dinner.

Obviously my kids were excited since she only comes 2-3 times per year.

Guess what she did!!!

She brought 3 of my 4 kids gifts!!!. As if that wasn´t enough, she even bought me and DH a gift each. She had giftbags with various items in them for all 3 daughters (almost 2, almost 5 and 10) but NOTHING for DS 12. She claimed she didn´t know what to get him

I know he´s at an age where finding gifts can become more difficult but he really is an easy kid when it comes to gifts. He´s very thankful and would have appreciated anything.

She even had the nerve to tell him she had been thinking of buying him a pair of socks!!! Well, then why didn´t she?

I hate having to deal with stuff like this .

 

[I Love Pluto]

MIL was wrong - very, very wrong. Tell this to your DS. Buy him something special in place of nothing. Explain that you feel bummed about this, too. You will never change MIL, but you can tell DS that you're not happy with her gifting all but him. Imagine how he feels being the only one left out.

 

[BoPeep]

That's just really rude. If she can't get all of the grandkids something then she shouldn't get any of them anything, unless it's someone's birthday of course.
MY MIL has done the same thing, but it's reversed. She'll get my son something and won't get my daughter anything. So rude.

 

[Freyja]

If she would fro time to time buy 1 kid something and not the others and would rotate so that eventually everyone would get a gift I´d definately be o.k. with it. But buying something for all but one!?! What´s up with that.

I think she was hoping he wouldn´t notice because he has a friend over from Denmark (he arrived yesterday). But come on, what 12 year old kid doesn´t notice???

 

[DISUNC]

Thats terrible!!!!

My mothers step mother (who lived in the same building as us) who we always called Grandma...use to just buy presents for her "REAL" grandchildren. And then SHOW what she bought them to me! Even at 7 I knew that was soooooooooooooooooooo ODD!

 

[shortbun]

edited because I reread the 1st post. She's thoughtless. Can she NOT have given him a $10 bill?
I would have said, "just give him cash, he'll love it!"

 

[MushyMushy]

I'll never understand people who do things like that. What are they thinking? Couldn't she have just given him a little cash?

 

[Mamu]

Being the MIL of 3 SIL and 1 DIL with a total of 5 GC ranging from 16 to 2. I understand totally your disappointment in her. Sometimes grandma don't think.

Yes older children are difficult to buy for, and I agree anything would have been better then nothing. I 'm sure your son was very hurt. Hugs for him.

To all grandma's if you can't purchase something for all the children, don't buy anything. I also agree with the other posters, my 16 year-old GS loves a card with cash.

 

[Mermaid02]

That was just a nasty thing to do to a kid. I'd tell her so.

 

[mickeyfan2]

This is so so wrong.

 

[powellrj]

My grandmother is back!!! Keep I mind I loved the woman when she was alive, but she was just clueless when it came to things like this. She thought nothing of taking the kids shopping and only buying something for a couple of the kids. Instead of giving a little money to the other ones, she would tell them she would get them something next time. Funny how it was always the same cousins that would get the gifts....

She would get what she wanted to give for christmas. Our most famous year was the flashlight year. I had a cousin who got a CB radio, my DB got a complete habatrail hamster system and I got a flashlight. Not a cool expensive flashligh, it was just a normal ray-o-vac $5 one. She knew I was a girl scout and thought I could always use a flashlight!

Gotta say it really hurt for a long time, but my DM just kept telling me that she means well and don't worry because its the thought that counts not the cost of the gift and she did put thought into it. 35 years later its a great learning lesson for our kids. When they are disappointed we always tell them "at least you didn't get a flashlight!"

Please give your DS an extra hug and if you have a couple of dollars to spare, put them in a card for him. While it may not make the hurt go away, he will at least know that you are on his side and you understand how much it hurt.

 

[Stitchfans]

So sorry that happened to your DS. Not that it makes it any better but that kind of crap isn't uncommon. We also have experienced situations similar to that with my awful MIL

 

[agnes!]

I think it's time for your DH to have a sit-down with Grandma. If I were in your situation, I would be tempted to say that NO gifts allowed unless ALL get something. Your DH could just hand them back to her if someone is EVER left out again.

What a nasty/thoughtless thing to do.
agnes!

 

[Pam]

That is just so, so wrong!
I don't blame you, I would be too!

 

[XYSRUS]

Go ahead and vent all you want...when will they ever learn? May we never turn out like them. Unbelievably (is that a word?) rude behavior. Give you son a hug and a kiss and let him know what a great kid he is!

 

[The Mystery Machine]

 

[momrek06]

Oh, that is just so unlike a "grandmother" to do something like that and then say she could not think of anything to get him ....how about $10.00 in a card!! He would be thrilled with that even though it is not an "item"!!!

to you Freyja, because I know this is probably bothering you more than DS!! AND good luck with the "visit"!!!

 

[C.Ann]

Ouch! That was not a very nice thing to do..

 

[AprilShowers]

Can she NOT have given him a $10 bill?
I would have said, "just give him cash, he'll love it!"

Perfect!

 

[Sherri]

I'm sure she could have given him $5.00-$10.00 and explained to him that she didn't know what to get him but to put the money towards something he wants.