MIL is dying! Things are getting worse!

[Credit Man]

That is so sad.

 

[C.Ann]

I'm not sure that I agree with the doctor's diagnosis of "depression".. It may just be that she's tired of being ill (I think one other time you mentioned she's been fighting this for several years?) and she's ready to "go".. My DH fought cancer and a host of other serious illnesses for a good 10 years and when he reached the point where he was able to accept that there would be no "cures" and things would just get worse as time dragged on, he decided on his own that he was tired, didn't want to fight it anymore, and was ready to meet his maker.. The doctors didn't like it - his family didn't like it - but the bottom line is that it was his choice..

I'd have a frank conversation with your MIL and ask her what she wants and then do whatever you can to support her decision..

Best of luck!

 

[Kristi1357]

 

[froglady]

I agree with Hospice; call them TODAY. Also, it may be time to tell her she can go. My father's doctors didn't think it was his time, but the social worker at the hospital suggested Hospice. We unfortunately followed the doctor's lead, so my father suffered more and longer than he had to. Once I told him that it was OK to rest and he didn't have to fight anymore, and that I would watch over Mom, he died within a few days.

 

[imsorry]

This is very hard for the family, but it comes down to being her decision.

My Dad had terminal cancer, and at first he went for radiation treatments every day. When they didn't help, we called hospice and stopped all treatment. They provide plenty of pain medication to lessen the suffering. He was unconscious the last week of his life; but when I told him not to be afraid to join my Mom (who passed 5 years before), he was gone within the hour.

It is so painful to lose a loved one, but prolonging their suffering is also painful. Let her decide.

You sound like a wonderful person and you will do the right thing! Stay strong - your Dis friends are pulling for you.

 

[EthansMom]

 

[snappy]

Prayers for your MIL and your family.

 

[SueM in MN]

Another vote for Hospice.
Another thing to keep in mind, that Hospice can help with is pain control. I don't know if she is having pain, but I do know studies have shown that most doctors don't do enough fro pain control - the patient gets depressed and doesn't want to live because all they can see in their future is more pain. If that's a problem, Hospice can help with that.

 

[BavarianPrincess]

Hospice has been an incredible help to my family too. They really help the whole family through the dying process.

 

[BavarianPrincess]

Hospice has been an incredible help to my family too. They really help the whole family through the dying process.

 

[BelleMcNally]

It's so comforting to see so many people suggesting hospice; it's been such a comfort to me and my family in the past. And I agree--this sounds like a text-book hospice-care situation.

It must be so hard on you to have to be strong and deal with all of this pain--my prayers are with you and your family.

 

[Mysteria]

Myst

 

[minniecarousel]

Prayers for your MIL and the rest of the family.

Hang in there.

 

[Tuffcookie]

Prayers that your DMIL will allow her family to take care of her in her final days, that God will give you strength, and your DMIL will not suffer long.
Hugs to you.

TC

 

[Dan Murphy]

Good wishes, Kitty, for your MIL. Do hope her time is good. My best for her, Gary, you and Lauren. You all are in my prayers.

 

[phillybeth]

It's so comforting to see so many people suggesting hospice; it's been such a comfort to me and my family in the past. And I agree--this sounds like a text-book hospice-care situation.

It must be so hard on you to have to be strong and deal with all of this pain--my prayers are with you and your family.

My grandmother chose at-home hospice care when she chose to stop treatments for her cancer. It is a wonderful thing. She was given the chance to die how she wanted- at home, in her own bed, no tubes, with her family around her, and pain-free. Hospice would have done everything for her- any social services she needed were right there, even volunteers to drive her to appointments, do her shopping, etc. Fortunately she lived with my parents and they took care of those needs. But she did request someone to talk to, so an older woman who was a cancer survivor would come over weekly to talk- and at the end just to sit and hold her hand.
Hospice arranged everything, from the medical equipment to the visiting nurses to the health aide to help her bathe and dress. And it was all covered 100% by Medicare. Wonderful caring people.

 

[mrsheppo]

My thoughts are with you and your family. Hope you will be able to look into hospice.

 

[Mackey Mouse]

I agree with contacting Hospice and get yourself some help.....these people are wonderful and trained to deal with the terminally ill..

Hugs to you and yours as you go through this and most of all prayers for your MIL.

 

[Sleeping~Beauty]

Prayers, love, and comfort to you, MIL, and everyone in the family.

 

[nativetxn]

I'm so sorry to read this. I just said a quick prayer for your MIL. Bless you for being so caring and for taking care of her. {{{HUGS}}} sweetie.

Katholyn