Meeting characters with social anxiety

[Princess Hannah]

Hi! I absolutely adore the Disney characters and meeting them, but I also have social anxiety. It's much more controlled in WDW than anywhere else (one of the many reasons I love the parks so much) but it is still there, and meeting characters is when it flares up the worst.

I've noticed that a lot of them are surprisingly good at handling me. Some of them seem to be able to sense that I feel uncomfortable and are very gentle with me. They're so great I've actually begun to get more comfortable meeting characters. But it's still way out of my comfort zone, and I've gotten very panicky while waiting to meet them, no matter how sweet they are with me. And I've had some pretty painful interactions too.

On my next trip in February, I really want to meet Merida. She's a massive inspiration to me and I want to thank her in person for everything she's done for me. I'm really afraid to meet her though--I actually chickened out on our last trip. I was wondering of anyone any advice about dealing with this? Or just wanted to talk about social anxiety in WDW in general.

And has anyone else noticed how most of the characters handle nervous/panicky people so well?

 

[anonymousegirl]

I am not in your situation, but sometimes, as a solo adult, I feel silly meeting the characters. What I do is plan out a few remarks or questions so there won't be awkward moments.

I do remember meeting Beast for the first time at MVMCP (with Belle in her red dress and cape). Just off the cuff, as I walked up to the hulking Beast, I said, "Wow, you make me look thin and pretty!" I hadn't planned that, it just came out, but Belle and I ended up talking about how hard it is to find clothes for Beast, etc.

Sometimes a prop helps. For a MNSSHP, I went as Snow White and grabbed a red apple from the quick service at my hotel. EVERY ONE of the princesses riffed off that apple. Cinderella said, don't let Gus see that-he'll eat it!" Snow White shuddered and recommended I DON'T eat the apple. Rapunzel thought Maximus would love it, etc.

 

[AlexLovesCats]

I'm the same exact way. I actually never met a face character although I always want to!! I'm nervous that I would seem really awkward and it would end up being a bad experience. Just letting you know that you aren't alone in feeling that way

 

[practicallyperfect77]

I don't have social anxiety but I LOVED meeting Merida. I'm a ginger and love meeting my fellow ginger princesses. =) She was a hoot too. Talked to me about what I had for breakfast and told me what she ate too. As a PP suggested, I would think of a question to ask her to help break the ice.

 

[FLchick415]

I don't have social anxiety but I LOVED meeting Merida. I'm a ginger and love meeting my fellow ginger princesses. =) She was a hoot too. Talked to me about what I had for breakfast and told me what she ate too. As a PP suggested, I would think of a question to ask her to help break the ice.

YES. I met Merida and asked about her brothers! That was a fun little interaction.

 

[Princess Hannah]

I'm really afraid to start crying when I meet the characters. Does anyone know how they'd react if I did? I've gotten close a few times.

 

[Wendybird55]

First I think the characters will be very caring and gentle if your begin to cry and do what they can to make you comfortable.

Though I don't have social anxiety, a suggestion I have is have you ever tried a character meal? Again, the characters interact with care, but it may be a less stressful situation as they basically come by and say "hi"..There is really no stress in doing any more interaction then saying "hi" and ask for a picture and / or autograph. Being in a restaurant situation gives you easy things to talk about like "How's the.....tonight" Or "did you cook any of the food"...Also the characters do have a schedule to keep so their visits aren't long or if you don't want extensive interaction with them you can kinda just wave and say hi and they will move on.

It just may be an easier atmosphere for you as you may not feel put on the spot so much as when standing in line for M&G. I don't know, but it may be worth a try. Maybe if you get comfortable with characters during character meals you will be more comfortable at M&Gs.

Either way, the characters are wonderful and will do whatever they can to make a guests feel comfortable and at ease with them.

I respect your efforts in overcoming your anxiety. I know it can be a difficult thing to do and you deserve much credit for trying and not giving up.

Good luck with meeting Merida.

 

[Jekyllcat]

If you are need some inspiration as to how to interact with the characters so that you can plan ahead and thus perhaps feel more comfortable, Google "Kenny the Pirate" and read his website. He has tips for comments/questions/behaviours to use to engage each character.

 

[Princess Hannah]

Though I don't have social anxiety, a suggestion I have is have you ever tried a character meal? Again, the characters interact with care, but it may be a less stressful situation as they basically come by and say "hi"..There is really no stress in doing any more interaction then saying "hi" and ask for a picture and / or autograph. Being in a restaurant situation gives you easy things to talk about like "How's the.....tonight" Or "did you cook any of the food"...Also the characters do have a schedule to keep so their visits aren't long or if you don't want extensive interaction with them you can kinda just wave and say hi and they will move on. It just may be an easier atmosphere for you as you may not feel put on the spot so much as when standing in line for M&G. I don't know, but it may be worth a try. Maybe if you get comfortable with characters during character meals you will be more comfortable at M&Gs. Either way, the characters are wonderful and will do whatever they can to make a guests feel comfortable and at ease with them.

I've had mixed experiences with character meals. I've been really panicky at them, and I've also had amazing times at them. On our last trip my mom sprung one on me and I didn't so very well with it being a surprise...it was a nightmare. But I've had amazing times at the Princess Breakfast with my sister too. It just depends on how I'm feeling and the situation that day I guess.

 

[Disney Khaleesi]

I had the exact same issue you have now when I went to Disney. I knew I was going to be meeting most of the characters alone or with my Dad (A very large 43 year old who doesn't appear to be capable of smiling) so I was nervous. I was with friends my 2013 trip so the few times we did meet characters I let them lead.

However, that being said, being at Disney just made the entire situation a million times better. I believe Gaston was the first character I met in April and my dad pretty much said "Jess! It's Gaston!" And he shoved me in line. I was really, really nervous about meeting a face character since I didn't know what to do. However he seemed to get that I was shy and it still went great. It was actually one of my favourite meetings of the trip! With a big personality like Gaston it probably helped, however I'm sure once you see how Merida interacts with some of the other guests when you're in line you can see how it'll go. The characters really do know how to take the lead if they need do and they will.

So don't worry about it too much, because I'm sure it'll be just great

 

[martinmont]

I have the same problem, I'm really shy as well. Planning to prepare some initial questions and just go with the flow

 

[TinkLoverSam]

I'm really afraid to start crying when I meet the characters. Does anyone know how they'd react if I did? I've gotten close a few times.

Not at the parks but on my cruise last week I was very upset as one of the excursions I was most looking forward to in Alaska was cancelled and we found out the morning of. As we left the excursion desk Chip and Dale were coming down to the lobby. I was crying and decided I needed a furry hug to feel better so I headed up to see them. Both gave me extra tight hugs and Chip wiped away my tears. It was kind of a great meeting even though I was very upset. (And we did end up going whale watching that day and saw some amazing whales!)

 

[OnlyDisney]

I can get quite nervous in public, especially when doing something I've never done before. I actually found the face characters easier to interact with. They would easily carry the conversation.
We ate at Chef Mickey and I would get so nervous/worked up about what to say or figure out what they were trying to say.

I found having a prop helps immensely. On our first trip I took blank notecards and printed an autograph card for the characters we would see at our meals. It was easy to show that to the characters and then they would ooo and ahhh over it. This last trip I took a character encyclopedia for them to sign. It was easy to have open to their page before it was our turn to meet them. I would pick something from the page to comment on and the characters took it from there so I wouldn't have to worry about what to say.

 

[jenniy122]

I have anxiety as well, but always want to meet characters (my traveling buddy doesn't care about characters, so we don't see to many). Last trip when I met Mulan I completely froze. I stammered out a "Hello" and then basically stared at her. It was SO awkward. But she was great, she asked me questions and tried to get me to interact with her. And I got my signature and my picture and went on my way. I still feel bad when I think about it now, 3 years later.

Fur characters are easier, you don't have to talk to them if you don't want to since they don't talk, just give them a hug and kiss and move on.

Meeting characters with other people with you is easier as someone else can take the lead. Having an idea of what you want to say in advance is also helpful. As someone else mentioned, props!

 

[Priory]

I froze when I met Thor at DLR a few months back. I wasn't expecting that. I don't think I even said anything. I just stared blankly into the camera. It was awkward. Still, it's a fun photo and memory. Don't worry too much if possible. You can even just smile and say thank you knowing you'll have a nice photo memory of the event

 

[Canadian Disney Mom]

I have social anxiety too, but I also love getting pics and autographs with the characters, which for me can be sometimes uncomfortable and awkward. I think the face characters are very good at getting reads off of people. They recognize who is chatty and who is not and follow the guests lead. I tend to be quiet so it is normally a quick visit, which is great for me The best face character experience i ever had was Jack Skeleton at Disneyland. He is one chatty fellow but he was also very open and engaging so I did not have any social anxiety and it was wonderful.

Merida was great last time. She asked what Kingdom I was from, etc. She was very sweet

 

[Keebles]

As a 40 (something) woman with Social Anxiety Disorder, Aspergers, and OCD, character interactions are the absolute hardest thing for me to do at Disney! In all the years I've been going, I can count on one hand how many times I've actually been able to go through with it (although I do get in at least one Donald line every single trip...I just end up chickening out before I get up too far). I was well into my 20's before my first Donald interaction and the picture was ruined because I was red-faced and twitchy (but, if I'm honest, there was alcohol involved too, just not enough to cause the aforementioned issues and I don't recommend it as a helper, often it makes things worse because I'm even more afraid of showing out or doing something stupid).

It always makes it easier when my sister is with me and we do it together. She's social and has no problems with interacting with the characters and she adds that little bit extra "just shut up and do it" force that I sometimes need to hear (although it doesn't always work). Plus, I've found that her interactions with the characters tends to take away attention from me (which is always good). The characters know when you're uncomfortable (somehow...part of the Disney magic I always say) and are really good about not being pushy.

I have to agree with the others who mentioned about planning what you are going to say beforehand. If it wasn't for my OCD obsessing about every minute detail, I wouldn't be able to go at all and I've even managed to go to Disney World several times by myself (which is a HUGE feat, trust me, I can't even go to Wal-Mart by myself). Any area that I have issues with has been meticulously played out over and over and over again in my mind first and I still have to sometimes walk away from a line, sit on a bench for a while, or, worst case scenario, go back to the room (which I try not to do because I rarely ever go back to the park for that day and I've wasted many an afternoon sitting in my room). Disney is probably the only other place on earth (besides home and work) where I feel the most "safe" and "happy". I tend to find that, if I want to do something bad enough (aka meet Donald), then I will eventually do it, just in my own time and way. Obsession beats fear every time (but Xanax never hurts! HA!).

I sometimes will hang out at character spots and get pictures of the characters when they are in-between other guests. A lot of the time, they will wave at you and it makes for good pictures that way too. That is usually enough for me because I get a picture of them without actually having to interact.

One year after the forecourt show, we were inside the castle taking pictures when the characters exited the stage and came right at us! Donald waved at me as they were going into their exit door and I started crying (I couldn't help myself and I was about to panic, which meant I would have to leave the park asap). Eventually, the princesses came off stage, Aurora saw me and blew me a kiss which was a weird enough shock to stop the crying and the panic and I was able to continue on with my day, so crisis averted. Aurora is my all-time favorite princess (and made even more so by that whole fiasco), but I can't ever see myself having the courage to meet her (heck, even walking on the side of Fairytale Hall makes me jumpy!).

Before the breakdown:
2004-0245 by Keebles, on Flickr

Good luck to you and I hope you are able to meet Merida! You'll have to let us know! Stitch is my elusive character I really want to meet but haven't been able to yet. If you have to walk away a couple of times first, don't get discouraged, just try it again when you're feeling up to it.

Oh, and props to you for being able to do character meals! It's one of the reasons (well, the only reason actually) why we don't go to Cinderella's Royal Table anymore...the thought of the entire restaurant staring at me while the characters are giving me attention is just too much to bear (and I always loved that restaurant). C'est la vie I guess.

 

[eyehartdisney]

Oh, and props to you for being able to do character meals! It's one of the reasons (well, the only reason actually) why we don't go to Cinderella's Royal Table anymore...the thought of the entire restaurant staring at me while the characters are giving me attention is just too much to bear (and I always loved that restaurant). C'est la vie I guess.

Oh my goodness, no one stares at you when you meet a character at a meal with the possible exception of 1900 park fare with the Tremaine family who are loud and tend to involve the entire restaurant. But even then, they're staring at the characters, not the person they're interacting with. I find that there are far, far, far more eyes on you in wait lines for characters than in meals where everyone is trying to hurry up and eat before the characters come. If you're that nervous, I would assume you go to the blind wait lines for the characters like in the character spot in epcot, not the world showcase anyway though.

 

[BuzzinDownToDisney]

Very interesting topic and amazing how our brains work in different ways. I am NOT a fan of crowds at all and have panic attacks at times if I feel I am trapped by one, however meeting the characters is sort of my safe zone bubble that puts me at ease.

It is the one place in WDW where you don't worry about having your personal space violated. Just you, the character, and anyone in your party, while the rest of the crowd waiting knows to stand back a bit. Think of it as "breathing room" but it is a chance to slow down and take a minute to have a nice interaction with someone/thing that has meant something in your life.

 

[Keebles]

Oh my goodness, no one stares at you when you meet a character at a meal with the possible exception of 1900 park fare with the Tremaine family who are loud and tend to involve the entire restaurant. But even then, they're staring at the characters, not the person they're interacting with. I find that there are far, far, far more eyes on you in wait lines for characters than in meals where everyone is trying to hurry up and eat before the characters come. If you're that nervous, I would assume you go to the blind wait lines for the characters like in the character spot in epcot, not the world showcase anyway though.

And this is why I rarely post on the DisBoards anymore, you can't tell when someone is being nice or being offensive. Since I might be taking your post wrong, I guess I need to add a caveat (and sorry to highjack the OP).

I have Asperger's (a mental condition that falls under the Autism category). Along with many other issues, my perception of things is skewed from the norm and tends to be internalized to a fault. Most times, the SAD and OCD work with the Asperger's and keep me from doing anything that "normal" people do, other times though, the OCD is stronger and I'm able to function semi-normally (or at least appear, on the outside, to be). I realize that most people find my reactions to social situations wrong, but, it is how it is and nothing can change it (it's how I'm wired). I'm also of an older generation of mentally-challenged adults who were taught as children to 'hide your issues so that nobody knows what (and who) you are' and, 'if you can't do, then don't do'. I'm trying to fix that.

While standing in line for characters, I'm too focused on trying to make it through the line to notice others (and I've stood in many a Donald line in various locations throughout the years). Once I'm at the character, I'm too freaked out at being there and trying to hurry up and get the picture taken...I don't see or hear those around me at all, my pulse is racing, my ears drums are beating, and I'm two seconds away from a panic attack. I'm so focused on keeping it together that it helps me get through it. If I do make it through, then I have photographic evidence to myself that I can do it and it can be done again and I'm proud of my achievement!

I sympathized with the OP because I get how social situations can sometimes be the end-all, be-all. If you can do a character meal, you can do anything, IMO. Plus, if an Asper can make it through a character interaction, then anyone can!!